Morning comes and finds me hiding
Mercilessly optimistic fingers of light
Poke and prod my resistance to the day.
You’re so quiet
So long since the happy voice called me
Years ago, the singing in the kitchen,
The bright face saying get up, up, up!
I don’t want to open my eyes
See how it will be one day
All grown up now
If I could, I would buy you the world
Tear down the sun to warm you
Make a treasure book of all those plans.
We had so many
Ships of dreams to build and set sail
Now tomorrow is an anchor in my chest
Life is an unmade jigsaw, missing parts.
I don’t think you’ll be here
For your birthday telegram...
Please try, mama
Now I’m crying again and I can’t show you
Rivers of pain waiting to burst free
But this day is precious, you’re here
And you’re singing.
You still know me, my name, my face.
You’re still there inside that frail shell,
Today is a promise waiting to be kept.
Give me just another minute
There’s no need to hurry
It’s gone too fast
Let me listen to your voice
Even though you stumble
Please, sing me one more lullaby.
For my mother, who has Alzheimer’s. I love her, she sings the best...and rudest, most hilariously twisted...lullabies. For you Mum xxx