I have lost myself. At some point I’ve forgotten who I was becoming, letting my Self slip through my finger tips where my essence once did reside. My childlike curiosity seems to have faded away with the castle-like clouds… it has changed its shape, again and again. Morphing from one creature to another, unconsciously, without my permission. This has been me for some time - a chameleon; changing with the backdrops strolling across this stage we call life. Folding my slices of thoughts into clichés of paper mache … fly away little crane, fly away… I have been the bystander of myself. All along, standing beside my Self. I am there though, just blind.. maybe even deaf and mute sometimes, but I am there.. I am here.. I simply just am. Though, as complex as I may make it, it is simple: to just be. This is what I have forgotten. This is what most of us have forgotten. I am realizing this more, as more Suns rise and more Moons fall, that nothing else really matters. These shadows casted upon us all, they do not exist. They cannot exist. Dark cannot exist when there is light.. and light is what we are. Unless there is a brick wall blocking our light, forcing its shadowing umbrella onto our hopes and dreams. But light is what I am, and dim I will no longer be. So today I start by opening a window for my shine, so tomorrow I can open the door, letting more of my light to leak. So soon I can walk through that doorway, one step at a time, further and further away from this dark shadowy wall until it disappears behind the horizon forever. Until finally, I am my true Self shinning vibrantly as the Sun does, becoming who we’re all meant to be - found and free.
A little journaling from my innards haha.. really just writing honestly and vulnerably without looking back.