I am but lost time in a lifetime,
Small movements disappearing in washed sand.
I can no longer bear this breathing,
Like needles upon the lungs.
Nothing ventured nothing changed,
The fire within dwindling to but a spark.
Shapeless in a crooked shaped world,
I am but lost time.
As far as I can see,
Is life but a memory?
Or a dream?

Love,
Your mysteriousness in question has made me second guess.
You've fooled me like the rest,
When I have lost ability to tell what is true.
You've turned an even weaker man blue,
How then can I call you love?
Were you even love to begin with?
Or just an illusion of what I've been seeking of?
Who knows what it truly is?
Or understands the vast valleys one finds them in during,
Hide my eyes no longer behind your cloudy veil, oh love.
For if I am ever truly to have you,
Then I must be free clear to see out of it, of you.
And gain the happiness of you again.

High in the sky,
Though not down low.
Is a face on the moon,
We all love and know.
No changes in expression,
But phases of the night.
No terror to speak of,
Just a beautiful sight.
Guiding those lost in darkness reign,
A daily duty done again and again.
Cratered moon with a friendly face,
A reflected light for us the human race.

There are things to remember,
In the months of September.
Of what was then,
Now gone away.
Of childish things,
With what childhood brings.
Along our merrily stay,
But when I had grown.
And you had come home,
Something longing had shown in me.
It was you that I had missed,
So wanting to kiss,
Knowing you were home with me.

They want more than a thank you,
Always wanting more than they need.
It never ends with a thank you,
Just saying more please.
Where did we grow so discontent?
Burning desires that never relent,
Why can't we just accept a thank you?
As a satisfying benefit,
This world is always wanting more.
Greed always knocking at the door,
But why can't it just end at a thank you.
Instead of always wanting more.
Remember to say thank you,
And never always wanting more.

Compressed chest,
Fully stressed.
Is it ending now?
I crumble in the corner,
Of my few days left.
Fire swirling in the dusk,
Hard to push on.
I fear I have no second chance,
No room left to breath.
My only light,
Dim in the foreboding night.
Feeling stretched till eternity,
Wanting to run.
Can’t leave,
Needing breathe for the last stretch.
Passing out into my abysmal lost wretch
Gone are the moments I can’t remember.
In this, my awful mess.

I don't think I need to remind you,
Of the thin ice you're on.
Make yourself a disappearing act,
There will be more than words you'll be missing on.
I don't care to be made a fool again,
Breaking me down as you did before.
This my only warning,
Or any open road will be no more.

Beautiful face on a canvas screen,
What does it mean when everyone adores you?
To me a mystery to an unknown,
Something to learn and know.
But I am simply a small spot amongst your pinned wall,
In this the mystery pushes on after all.
So what say you storyteller with words to say?
What folds of life wrap around your page?
I guess time will tell of the mystery at hand,
Of an author on a journey in a far away land.

I know it,
It burns like hot coals in my throat.
Directions that seem clear,
Only to disappear when it's time to go.
It's never goodbye,
But it feels like so.
What broken record am I that it stays and stings?
A heart is a useful gift,
But sometimes it's use.
Is restricted by what it brings.

There are places asunder,
Too many apart.
Where all ask for second chances,
But get only a first start.
By bringing the boiling simmer,
Off to cool.
Do we realize there is more,
Than these disheartening fools.
I bare no notice to any seismic smarts,
Being more than simple peasantry.
Is it not worth more the restart?
This circle of unending days,
Lashing till they perspire.
Hope like the light,
Gone out with the fire.
No more recession of self,
No more desire.
Council closed,
This the taunting of what a new year brings.
Questions,
Memories.
Let the New Year sing.

I am small and bare,
Lost in the unending ocean.
Where some find themselves,
When the question asked has yet an answer.
Too many parts with not enough info,
The path laid bare with facts in the open.
What do I say to that open door?
Ask to stay and ask for more,
Am I mistaken in what I see and feel?
Or is there more in what the face appeals,
Swirling moments of days lost.
Am I ready for what now will cost?
In this the true answer lies,
No more tears no more goodbyes.

No person is without the risk of losing,
No soul is without its worth of saving.
I see the differences in the days light,
The prism which I've had all my life.
It's funny how things work out though,
Still so far I have yet to go.
The lessons learned still deep out of reach,
The miles I've traveled.
Have they yet to teach?
I am the child of lonely sad madness,
That which can only be obtained through deepened sadness.
But here I am more lively than most,
Playing along as the second ghost.
This is the voice shouting against the wind,
Here I am, come get me if you can.

What mysteries do you appear to hold?
Or challenges you wish to throw at me.
Threats with wild turns,
Don't always seem to be happening.
But I digress in your wanderlust ways,
Of wishing for some past days.
The ones living up to your status quo,
But what do I know.
When I in myself,
Trapped in the life I'm creating.
Can only see what you show,
This I know.
We the sinners fallen from grace,
Out of place.
Yet time is not always kind,
This I've learned everytime.
Beaten into me,
Reminded again and again of yore.
And there the past can always painfully replay,
That I am not allowed there.
I have no place to stay.

There are no simple pleasures without consequence,
No room for error except learning to dance.
Beaten brow for a repeated cycle,
Chasing after rainbows like a daily rebel.
What shining light blinds you so?
When in the world you'd rather lose your soul,
The frightening truth one rarely sees.
When love becomes the motivation,
What then will you be?

Nostalgia,
The great reminiscer.
The big money blisser,
All according to those remembering so.  
But a warning to be fair,
Of things past done not bare.
People pay in the droves for so,
The memories of joy.
And happy abides,
Long gone.
But remembered in days gone aside,
A taste of blissful high.
What will the payment be?
For remembering once more,
The memories thought to bring peace.
And the world you adored,
I can't comprehend the nostalgia galore.
When people would give their world,
For days of yore.

There are no sympathies from the devil,
Even less so from human kind.
Be prepared for either or,
For neither received are kind.
I leave a warning for all those who will hear,
That a time is coming to make a choice clear.
A folly is simple and will never work twice,
When the future comes forward with an unsettling price.

No truth is greater than the one we face,
Or a lie we create and believe in kind.
The reality of the perception of those around you differ,
Good or bad.
High or low,
The morally bankrupt and those whom keep to them.
The culmination of the whole all around us,
And yet only still halfway there.
These, the moments of life at hand,
The pinpoint pinpoints we miss yet try to conceive.
What is life?
What is it we truly need?
Too many given answers,
And no clear path to see.

No matter how much you push me out of your scene,
Either tyrannical, delinquent, or frightful mean.
It will not change the heart beaten word of you,
Laced amongst the words of many.
Flowing freely in their grasp,
Oh how at last in meeting.
The feeling remains like last,
I've ridden the self-titled roller coaster.
Seeing in which almost every move you make,
Dancing on your battleground.
Only makes in yourself forsake,
I'll never fully understand your position.
Only the outside going round and round,
In all of you I'll love.
Till the end of me is found.

I am but a few words,
Mindful of manners and mayhem.
My dreams come in waves of plenty,
Yet I spare only a few.
I mumble and tumble over them,
They beg no quarter.
Yet wish to be heard,
I silence what wishes to speak.
Yet lives on only in single memory,
I dance around in cryptic self-wonder.
But must answer in plainish ways,
Is it the punishment of living onward?
Am I to be the self translator of self?
Cursing but not ending,
Living but not yet dead.
What possible way of misery is this?
What cantankerous absolute point of view is worth seeing first?
Am I the wild one?
Set forth to wander a desert made by others.
Perish the thought I survive someone else’s dream,
That I live the uncontrolled controlled.
What manner of mindset does the fool endure?
What crept, slithered, painstaking idea became my own?
My dream, is it?
My life, is it?
My sadness, my madness, the ups and downs, is it?
Who lives of me?
Who lives for me?
Who desires to see me and not demand compensation?
Does the wind blow in my favor?
This tossing and turning of mayhem and manner is outwardly atrocious,
It begs, it pleads, it demands as like a child.
Am I still?
By others do I mature or am I already?
Questions and personal answers,
But who’s right?
What desire of manner is of self or of others?
I ask and yet self reply,
I see yet seen only others self.
This is the madness of this world,
Am I of you or am I of me?

It's hard to get rid of,
This old crusty skin.
Am I to rid myself of this tiredness?
Or by it cave in?
Lost and dreary forever on this empty shore,
Begging for more when all recedes me.
This is the never ending struggle of the mind,
Bearing and dragging me down all the time.
And so it is that it bears down more,
When there's no room to breath.
And nary a door.

And so in earnest truth,
This is where it stays.
Honest hope long forgotten,
A road now phased.
Is it best to be forgotten?
When no real word of you left rings true,
When distance sets its accordance.
And I no longer have a voice in seeing you,
Then again it was expected,
This is where life always goes.
While one flies in one direction,
The other stays and flows.
So I am glad you have what you wanted,
Maybe that's where you're meant to be.
Better than the alternative,
Wasting time on an old fool like me.

Like a song within my soul,
The view just gets really old.
And though sometimes I'll never truly see,
What happens next to me.
The walls sometimes close in,
And with the song I play again.
With every line the feelings hurt,
There's not a moment sometimes I feel like I've lost my worth.
So play sweet melody,
Bring back those gone memories.
I don't care in which way they return,
It's my heart that yearns.
And I try, oh yes I try,
But it keeps coming back.
Yes it keeps coming back,
No longer are the days simple without keeping track.
So play on old soul melody,
Let every harmony and pitch rise.
Flowing indiscriminately,
My eyes and ears will keep aim on the rise.
For me here and now,
There are no goodbyes.

As I see it,
Free days are long gone now.
No room for movement free,
The time for catch-up disappeared somehow.
No time left for breathing,
It's nice to know a try was made.
But ended up to be a lost treating,
This chance slipped by so long ago.
The chance for any sort of meeting,
But that's ok.
No need for a reason why,
Everything said like so.
What once a hope now an annoyance,
But it was as it was.
So many years ago.

I am but one point in time,
Of release or capture.
Far down the line,
Breathe in, then release after.
Of worry, hard to let go,
Make better with time.
This failing truth I know,
Swimming in the dark murky swamp.
Depths of empty abyss proceed me,
Cries for freedom tis that life be over.
All forsaken in this tiring race to be free.
Destitution in sorrow slows the pace,
Empty is the ride that’s over.
Lowly disgraced.

From the darkness came the red,
Dancing on the Devils head.
Burning fires like the sun,
The Devils deeds yet to be done.
And when the worst brings forth the fall,
You yourself consumed by all.
As terror writes the rotting skull,
The fires of hell become too tall.
And at the end the dark remains,
The Devils joy, unending pain.

You and I and our similarities,
Bridge us at the midway divide.
Though the worlds soundly sleep,
From you or them I cannot hide.
I am seen through by your kind eyes,
Though how this can be.
To me has remained a surprise,
I am grateful but quite at a loss.
When in the end I pay the cost.

Out of all things,
Those simple complex things.
Those lost, confusing, fearful, dangerous things,
Will light still shine?
Breaking the darkness held upon one's heart,
Stopping it from breaking apart.
Oh how fortunate are they the hard-hearted,
For their hearts resist the breaking.
Only in turn for their heart,
To end up aching.

Peer into my universe,
Lifting my disguise.
Although things could get worse,
Trying to hide from everyones eyes.
There are days I'd rather be dead,
Being free to roam it all.
The foolish can be mighty,
Making me feel just so small.
What comes next,
Is a mystery.
This world can leave one big upset,
Be what you can be.
There's no time,
To question it all.
For more appear,
Every question you have.
Brings another near,
This all in more.
Trying to make the answer clear,
Oh I'm just so tired.
Yet floating in this universe,
I am here.

Perish, perish,
Oh thought of wonder.
The mind needs rest and ease,
You drivel and drive.
Till the end of the line,
Can not your heart be set free?
But where do you travel,
In this bitter battle.
That no sane person would ever follow,
Is it here or is it there?
Whether up or down in this pointless manner,
My rest, my sleep matters.

Pieces of the heart,
Pieces of the mind.
Pieces of what you need,
Pieces that you'll find.
It's easy to know what you have,
Yet hard to place them together.
Of things you've felt,
And all you've seen.
Would it not make it better?
To make your own,
Means more work than you want.
But the pieces are there,
Whether you see them........or not.

That possessive soul that stares into you,
Knows what hides deep beneath your skin.
As you say only the devil knows,
What sink you've been sinking in.
The skies the limit,
Nothing now can stop you.
Only until the end will you not notice,
That your just another clown.

Power plays,
On different days.
Bringing irony to the tip top of this plateau,
I struggle with words beyond reach sometimes.
But never forgetting what's below,
Hellish work for sound minded journeymen.
When all wish to be as quite so,
Yet when one is corrupt.
The mind no longer sound or sane,
This is the beginning to what's below.
And never be seen again.

Neither declaration nor proclamation,
Can save ones skin.
This paradox of life,
That I'm stuck in,
Consumes and blooms.
To ravage me whole,
This predicted doom.
I cannot control,
The imploding surprise.
Of squandered time with closed eyes,
This back and forth conversation does show.
In time does it die or grow?
The answer a question,
I don't really know.

In truth I'd rather see you fully gone,
Having always been on my brain.
Incomplete with no moving on,
You call for a restart.
When even you don't know how,
I question this turn.
After the pushes you put on me somehow,
I can't accept your common courtesy.
When you painted a painful point of view,
Do you still even listen?
Or care?
As you say you do.
I will no longer stand,
On this sandy ground you provide.
You started and finished,
A restart I can't see you to abide.

Quarreling lovers,
Put out the light.
Shut up,
Go to bed.
Don't forget to turn out the light,
Your rambling arguments are childish shambles.
Get up and get over it,
Or figure out your unlearned parables.
Your stupidities reach beyond your garden wall,
Stop fighting and grow up.
Stop using the wall,
Obvious fallacies lay on both sides.
Either work it out and be adults,
Or for the love of the almighty.
Say your goodbyes,
Your public fights are childish with no reaching results.
Shut up,
Go to bed.
And leave relationships to those wishing to be there at all.

Exasperated, exonerated, running all in between,
Despaired and impaired something not quite seen.
The sigh grows long and wide,
Worried at the worlds inquisitions.
Burning with a fire that is still hidden,
Bide the time or bite the bitten.
What face of fear conquers the weak?
Is it the worlds or the one who looks back from the mirror?
The question is answered by oneself,
I ask in order to know.
What makes you stop and what lets you go?

Sunshine,
Radiant sunshine.
The days are long,
And I feel blue.
Please shine on me too,
This world longs for darkness.
With spots of light,
As days become unending night.
So sunshine,
Oh radiant sunshine.
How long till peace comes through?
If I should ever wilt away,
Please oh sunshine.
Shine on me too.

That's it,
Read closer.
Let the words draw you in,
But be warned.
What you take away is based on your position,
I'm no teller of hopes or dreams.
I've crumbled and been crushed by mine it seems,
Can't operate.
Can only simulate,
What wish I have for me.

Nothing creates such strong a desire,
As the red-haired girl with the power of fire.
But while the day will come of counted cost,
The girl of fire will have a loss.
The father and daughters bridge broken at high mast,
Where at the end the girl and father will make their choice at last.
And though by no fault of their own,
The time comes sooner now once more.
For the choice of both lives,
Will be harder than ever before.

You reminisce,
About a kiss.
But words utter fail,
At the feelings released.
Now memories fade of such a thing,
Gone in the new days ring.
You scramble for good times,
But they disappear on a dime.
In this the memories bliss,
For days of loves lost kiss.

This burning sprawling fire,
With a look that could burn me for hours.
Comes and goes,
With the passing of every look upon you.
Everytime I wish to be mean,
Screaming things totally obscene.
I can't be so mean towards you,
It's not fair on my end.
Of you who wishes to be called friend,
Sidestepping so easily on every turn.
You ignore me as I once tried to ignore you,
But again I find.
With memories in line,
In the things that made me fall for you.

Everyday you rise and fall,
Ready to ever fail.
But the challenge you rise to raise,
Leaves those on you to bail.
Foolish is he to touch the heart,
Where all you show is stone.
Beating dead the horse you bring,
Leaves you again home alone.
Fire and brimstone you sometimes spew,
With belts of sorry in between.
It wouldn't be so haltingly horrible,
If you weren't so equally mean.

I said to see,
This shining sea.
A case for all to be,
Of tried and tired.
Creation and tyranny,
Why must we fall and rise?
Why must some end in misery?
Does the sun not shine for all?
Revealing all to see,
The world, a ******* up blue ball.
Full of man’s ire destiny,
Is it of destiny or prophecy?
For man it is both,
A tempest *** of problematic dreams.

Perish the thought of the secluded mind,
Dances of the soul quite completely out of time.
I've seen and felt the waves of emotions,
From shore to shore.
If one could feel beyond and more,
Yet there I am in those thoughts.
Like candlelight against the dark,
Shining like a star in its depths.
What one could tell the shining was for,
In the end it just doesn't seem clear anymore.

It's easy to stay in love with the memories,
Leaving all trace of reality behind.
With moments of joy and bliss wrapped around you,
The feeling of leaving is never fine.
They creep and crawl,
Wanting your return.
In this it's easy to learn,
How these memories ******.
Every moment after,
Time after time.

So in this moment I've caused my own wounds,
Didn't think or hold truth still.
My abhorrence is in my demise,
Time to let go of the disguise.
And begin to prove myself true,
Cause out of all the while and out everything my idiocy will lose you.
So time to step up myself and prove my mettle,
In hope for future stakes too.
Or otherwise face a darkened road,
Continuing on with this unbearable questionable load.
And face myself alone,
Like I always do.

Like flesh on a page,
All wish to be adored.
Never ignored,
Center of their own attention.
They splish and splash until seen by all,
But there lies their downfall.
For what is given up is a pivotal point of view,
That all can see and watch.
Not a remainder of yourself out of sight,
No longer to remain hidden.
In the self created spotlight,
This touted tussle sets up ones demise.
For all to be seen,
By everyone's eyes.

Should one sell themselves so short?
That their works and wonders,
Are rendered useless.
That their earned respect and rightful deserving favor,
Spoiled by those of just or unjust nature.
Maybe I am blind to those who work and break themselves in order to survive,
Or to the reasons of why their good works lay away to the side unseen or unused.
If that is true then no truth is ever in me,
How can it be?
When I've been deemed blind by others.

You see from shadows,
But never speak clear.
Your voice a silence,
Gotten used to it over the years.
What is the continuation of your comfort bonds?
You seek a solace,
In what you distance on.
I take no more pain,
Or pleasure.
Why together stuck like glue?
When in your heart,
I'm no longer part of you.
I question,
I turn.
I question,
I turn.
You whom sits in shadows,
Of once whom had the spotlight.
Now more or less,
A whisper.
Silent in my night.

Let the sunshine filter through the shade,
Breaking the rules of yesterday.
With dancing beams of pure light,
Singing with voices of lost sight.
While rays of light show dusty bits,
I myself run out of tricks.
So as I watch those dancing beams,
I sit and stay to watch over dreams.
And as the day begins to flow into night,
Sleep, O sleep, hello goodnight.