"sobering" poems
Like a hearth,
Her hair was inviting
And warm, red mahogany
Her deceptive eyes
Sensing danger
Betrayed only
by her quivering crimson lips
Back against the wall
Separated by arm’s length
Sobering distance
Maddening silence
She, reticent siren
Far from the ocean
Far, far greater than its depth
She, from the wild
A wolf’s howl
Far from the forest
Far, far greener than its leaves
She was shelter,
In the mountain
I found myself lost
Oct 9, 2014
Oct 9, 2014 at 6:05 PM UTC
Enchanted by spring’s
rustling whispers
... whistles swirl
in the pungent springtime breeze;
steeped with a bedazzling
cadence
heart dancing
to a hummingbird’s
whirs
waves of breath,
of little wings waft,
whooshing throughout
twining honeysuckle lattice
a
tiny manger
beset of hidden gold
precious speckled eggs,
silver lining of smallest hopes
fruits of fruition
continuum beheld prize,
concealed in interwoven rootlets;
potently perfumed flowers
while away
the waning dark hours;
swollen full flower moon
waxing yellow,..
heavenly fragrance
sweetly-scented suckled nectar
the one with eyes of a child,
wonder ― hidden inside,
marvel in the light of grateful eyes
imbibing an unholdable moment's
spellbinding elixir
... poetry alive
air so poignantly perfumed
with blossom
moonstruck
by spring’s frolicking cadency
a reverent moment's
edifying intoxication
a sobering beauty that just is...
someone ... May 2017
May 10, 2017
May 10, 2017 at 12:19 PM UTC
He smiled at me and said 'here, take this'
It was a happy little pill of his and it would feel bliss
I smiled and gave him a kiss saying, 'thank you baby'
But what happened next forever will drive me crazy
Next thing you know I was spinning in my head
Then he wanted to bring me to a bed
His friends walked in and wanted more
So they all called me a ***** little *****
My body was numb and I couldn’t move
I let out a scream but they didn’t approve
Everything went black but then again I woke
But to them it was nothing but a funny little joke
They locked me inside of a walk in closet
So if there was a stir I sure wouldn’t cause it
I blacked out again and woke in a different place
Treating me as if my soul were missing and my body were a case
Still I was unable to move nor speak
But he still said he loved me and kissed me on the cheek
I counted five inhumane beings on top of me moaning
One was even playfully groaning
I was disgusted and wanted it to end
But I knew that after this my mind would never mend
By now it would have been a little past three in the morning
Earlier I should have taken that adorable face as a warning
When they realized I was sobering up
They had an alibi saying they’d call this a hookup
When I could finally move my mouth again
I realized what had happened and felt heavy chest pain
They heard that I was muttering words that were incomprehensible
They saw me as nothing more than a body and that I was dispensable
They came up with a plan to hide my body in a ditch
I even heard one say, 'she deserved it, what a stupid bitch'
I hit my head when they threw me on the ground
I only saw black in front of me and around
I woke up to a woman asking if I were okay
I only said one phrase and it was that 'I was betrayed'
What happened after that is irrelevant at best
All I will say is that I was nothing but stressed
This is my story and it happened two years ago today
Nailing an image in my mind that I was a targeted prey
I know now that I hold so much more worth
And I love myself more than anything on this Earth
Just know that these words have come straight from my heart
No matter how vile and disgusting this memory is, I can never restart
So I tried to make it a poem so it seems like some kind of art.
h.m.w
Sep 28, 2017
Sep 28, 2017 at 5:57 PM UTC
#*A thrown flat stone skipped
across the snowcapped reflection
breaking the mirror glass surface;
rippling the glaring still waters
the way a trailing piano note
slowly decays to a sobering hush
A gentle puff of silence
segued into a fading
whisper's echo*
Jesse
Apr 6, 2018
Apr 6, 2018 at 10:21 AM UTC
I need rehab from you, and I’m sorry
but this isn’t healthy.
Admitting being a problem is sobering
And I hope you can recover from my withdrawal.
I’ll be busy detoxing myself,
For everyone after you.
But mostly for myself.
I hope you remember how great you are!!
As I try to forget all the poison you gave me
I'll be cheering you on from a far!!
& revising the scripts I tell myself
So that one day I'll stop playing the role
You put me in
And I'll start living
For myself again
Jan 30, 2019
Jan 30, 2019 at 12:04 AM UTC
*Though, should I
or have I begun?*
To feel the tussling
Of blurring bodies.
Transforming and dancing,
Through these very halls.
Where aching is thick,
and a embrace is a release.
*Should I begin?
How should I begin?*
Swallow the dagger,
stabbing from behind.
Let it sit deep in my stomach.
Push it further, where it can’t cut.
*Where will it end?
How will I begin?*
Under lock and key,
Just where I left it .
It escapes as it did just now,
conjuring a puncture to bone.
Blood flows,
Rushes out into the world.
*Is this a release?
How can I heal?*
Pouring out,
It tastes salty on the cheek
The color is dark,
cold to the touch.
Purging the night,
that stained blood black.
Sifting the chill,
of steel from bone.
Ringing out whats left of gore and fluid,
down the drain.
*I can begin now.
This is the end.*
Oct 28, 2016
Oct 28, 2016 at 11:13 AM UTC
Stuck
in a ***** two-room apartment
almost out of cigarettes ,
at one in the middle
of a sweaty Chennai night,
sobering up after two days,
famished
and restless
dreaming of mid-night
cigarette shops that never were,
dreaming of alcohol
(just enough to pass out),
checking and rechecking
the spent bottles
and giving up in the end
and settling to tolerate a night
with myself,
walking and babbling
and writing and thinking
and floating up on a great idea
and circling back to the floor
looking for cigarettes,
just waiting for the shutters to lift,
just waiting for this to end,
just waiting.
It was the best metaphor for life
that I've ever known.
Aug 26, 2014
Aug 26, 2014 at 5:10 PM UTC
Maybe it's been written
somewhere in the constitution
of the waning moon
― When somebody loves you,
you can never be lonely ―
But, appearances
to the contrary,
the moon is sometimes blue;
***counting stars alone
in a sky full of stars***
is just about as lonely
as 'once in a blue moon'
can be ―
Like when the night is yours alone
or feeling alone
in a crowded room
hearing Hank Williams moan within your silence
"I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry"
― When it's hard to say
you love someone,..
but it's harder to say
when you don't ―
• • •
A coyote's pleading howl
breaks the silent twilight engulfing trance
cast by the dappled moonlight;
like there's some kind of lonely madness
swallowing him whole,..
as
these two hollow eyes
gaze out through
the chilly,
sobering
refreshed
Autumn air
spilling
in through
the open window,
***counting stars ― alone
in a sky full of stars***
the crackle of the fireplace
echoes, startling the silence
of a feigned warmth
from the other side
of an otherwise hollow room
and i feel frayed as a hole in an empty pocket with nothing left to lose
the impending dark winter nights are lonesome
and linger longer than before ...
seeing the empty space beside me
I remember how it really really aches to just be ...
***lonesome as a blue moon ― ***
✩ ✩ ✩
✩ ✩ ✩
✩ ✩
☽
moonless ― rivers ... 2017
Oct 18, 2017
Oct 18, 2017 at 7:21 PM UTC
The shaking stops, numbness ensues
Restless nights take hold
Suppressed negativity rushes to me
Like a title wave of unwanted emotion
When will it stop............?
When will it stop.............?
Dawn breaks over the city
The temptation to reach for the bottle... ever growing
Shaking continues
But this time with rage
Sweat drips from my brow
Drink..........
Drink..........
Drink..........
The voices start chiming in my mind
Diving under cover the bottles clink...
clink.......
clink.......
Empty bottles surround me
Just a drop to relieve my pain
I can't bare this a second longer
The 4 walls of this room, my own person hell
Click!
The electric meter cuts off
Change is hard to come bye
Just empty bottles
Rage flows through me
Smashing up the room I leave
Walk that'll help
People though
People looking
People everywhere
Eyes in every window
Looking.... judging
The agony of the sober anxiety, taking hold consuming my mind
Card rejected a new low
I find change for bread
Managed to pay
Sweating uncontrollably
I can see the apartment block
My head clears
Stumbling into the darkness
I look around the room
The sobering realisation
I have nothing, no one but these empty bottles
Oct 11, 2014
Oct 11, 2014 at 1:50 PM UTC
My conscience is loud
yet my voice never comes,
It's disarming what dependency can do, altering your character,
until you are simply a character,
weaving falsities into strands of fools gold, until you're living in an armor
of the emperors new clothes.
I swore to myself,
that I would never again be this person, the one with my finger
on the self destruct button,
but sliding down the hill
comes much easier than climbing.
And at the bottom,
numbness awaits me,
making me fearless.
I feel the cold wash over me,
goosebumps all throughout my being,
as the waves begin to rise.
She covers me,
salty yet sweet,
and everything makes sense.
The meaning of life in a pretty peach casing.
I am Invincible.
I am Oblivious.
She peaks and soon crashes,
repeatedly against me,
making me feel like the world could end and I wouldn't even think to care.
But what at first seemed exhilarating, wears on me to no end,
the buildup and constant let down.
She's lost her novelty,
and with that,
the numbness fades.
Sobering up for long enough to realize,
I am the definition of insanity.
Inviting you back in so often,
I no longer have defenses against you.
You snuck into my priorities without me ever noticing.
Like that song you hate so much but can't help to sing.
Will I ever get rid of your tune in my head?
Will I ever be able to say no when you call?
Jun 12, 2017
Jun 12, 2017 at 8:51 AM UTC
May 23rd, 2019
I first felt the ferrous fissures
Delivering shivering quivers
Down my spine
As each chime took the sight
Outside our present days
Then the shakes grew into tension
My naked, sobering suspension
Was left never to mention
Nor whisper what I needed to say
And when I asked you of this
You withdrew so quick
I only had time to trace the lines
Of your last escaping shadow
Holding on to tentative strings
And all the small things
You left for me to find
The same gray forests of signs
And plaintive silent ways
Designs you used to craft
And convey with clever ease
Laughter once beseeching my thoughts
Silence now haunting my dreams
These memories are now
Presently looming
Cold coniferous trees
It's not as if I can pretend
Like simply taking paper and pen
Could possibly remedy this
While I have to look down
At the ink staining my foot
Ankle and wrist
I'm convinced that I created this fate
Because in this picture frame
I'm the only one who made a mistake
*You carry the hate in your heart
like it's been privileged to you*
*My misgivings have adopted
the persona that I imbue*
*I faced the other way as we faded
when you withdrew*
*You suffered daily
and faced this struggle alone*
*Claiming everybody abandoned you
and did you wrong*
*-But you don't lose me
Like I've told you all along*
RE: August 23rd, 2021: - but now you've lost Me with the same old song
May 7, 2019
May 7, 2019 at 2:20 AM UTC
#
This depressive choreography
of flames
f i k r n
l c e i g
consumed in the geography
of bodies
b i c k e r i n g
Tongue's embers licking
the innocent cheek
words like poniards
P R I C K I N G
leaving this dance at its
pique
Now left a s m o u l d e r i n g
soloist on the stage
a dance so sobering
watch this fire's rampage
burn his own pyre
I gave into the rage
burn his own desire
another illegible page
tossed to fuel the bellowing fire
the end of our golden age
#
Aug 15, 2018
Aug 15, 2018 at 10:52 AM UTC
the same place i used to play with my toy trains i get drunk alone at 230 in the morning
thats a sobering thought
Dec 6, 2015
Dec 6, 2015 at 3:29 AM UTC
Under the mantle of this world
The thickness of the storm clouds
Perpetual, thorough
Meeting the foam crest of the waves
Dark enough to hide intentions
Walking along the tired rocky shore
A stretch common, tasteless to all but the vaguest sense
Some spray, felt deep along the sides of the tongue
The sobering corpse, I found
Still clawing at the stones
I can feel the tears well in my eyes
There is nothing I can do
Empathetic thoughts blow through my mind
Cold strains of tainted breath
His voice is cold air, so dissimilar
And with every trace of dogma
Such overused platitudes
Yet I hold fast to that stringent emotion
He knows me
He knows what I used to be, and what brought me to who I am
I watch him
He tries to pry, bone exposed at the fingertips
Why did this come to me
Remorse
Filled with pity, I bend down
I comfort him
The host burst
And now I feel it
Moving though the back of my skull
It's tendrils become rooted
The eyes see though my own
And it swallows what It will
The desperate remains inside me scream at it
But it's just rotten flesh
And there's nothing left for me
Now and forever
Mar 31, 2017
Mar 31, 2017 at 12:41 AM UTC
thinking in quiet
at the end of a busy day
about what you have actually done
can yield sobering results
Jan 25, 2019
Jan 25, 2019 at 7:10 PM UTC
At night my arms become yours
Not so much in a physical way
More in a viral way
You force me to push my pillow over my head
Like a helmet
Preparing for battle
You know my dreams could **** me
We battle on threw miles of dream
Years go by
Life times are spent
Loving and hating
Whispering and screaming
Planing our escape
Then I awaken
Pull my helmet off
And realize that you are somewhere els
Dreaming too
It is a saddening thought
But a sobering one as well
As I regain full control of my arms
I think to myself
Did people sleep on there sides before pillows?
May 1, 2013
May 1, 2013 at 8:45 PM UTC
I'm not addicted to the substance
I don't really care about the high or the low
I'm addicted to the morning after
I'm addicted to being able to tell you exactly how I feel
and to take it all away the next day
I'm addicted to "I'm sorry, I was so ****** up."
I'm addicted to "It's okay."
Because I'll never be enough.
I'm addicted to the aftertaste of our drunken kiss
I'm addicted to forgetting how you pushed me from your lips
I don't care for lightheaded feelings
I get enough from you
I don't need the acid rising up
but you hold me when I do
I don't need the ****** parties
The kids all passed out on the floor
I'm addicted to sobering up
I'm addicted to needing you more.
Sep 6, 2014
Sep 6, 2014 at 12:42 AM UTC
The coffee *** just signalled, Ready,
So I pour the cream before the java:
A cup of divergent thinking.
There are roads running
In opposite directions,
Sharing points of similarity:
A tree, a sign, me.
Inside or outside the box of thinking,
Using the lower and upper ladder rungs
To paint the same wall,
Prologues and epilogues to the same story,
Lawyers in clown suits,
Children using,
Kittens chewing slippers,
Dogs in litter boxes,
Earth cooling,
Healing and feeding the masses,
Elected monarchies... NO monarchies,
Sleeping in or getting up,
Cursory letter to family and friends
(Though this is coming to an end),
Making love while wearing gloves,
The moon moves east to west
In the blink of sleep,
Churches giving alms and unlocking doors,
Schools excelling,
Parents attending.
To juxtapose is divergent,
Like sobering up with detergent
(You may be clean, but are you dry?).
If insurgents were divergent,
We'd have more convergence.
Feb 10, 2015
Feb 10, 2015 at 9:25 AM UTC
Intake warm breeze
as chest expands
Like a tequila shot
Slammed
Top shelf tequila...
A more enduring
Sobering
Variety of elixir
Oxygen and energy ringing
Integrity intact
Confidence withstands
Through chaos and madness
I AM a glorious being
We ARE shining out
into the galaxy
Can't you see?
Only by running on
Spiritual fumes of evermore
Can we truly be
All we were meant
Without a penny spent
The universe expands
Fills up every pore
of pink lung
Feeding blood as
it wraps around
My heart squeezing out
Every ounce of
Stamina and love
Exhale air of hope
So grateful to it
Swirling up
My being bowed down
in reverence
Indebted to it
the atmosphere
The same breeze
Engulfs birds in the trees,
Who drink it up,
Singing sweetly
Sure beats man-made
Intoxication any day
of the week
Don't you think?
The best highs
of this life
are beautifully
Intrinsically
Deceivingly
Free
Go forth!
Spread your wings
Spanning from
Past to future
Fly to sights unseen!
Soar the currents of today
Right up to the heavens
Dear friends!
I'll be perched
Waiting for your faces
in the branches of Serenity,
Chirping hymns of Love
Jan 15, 2015
Jan 15, 2015 at 1:25 AM UTC
My like for you has turned into love.
its uncontrollable, pouring over the edge love.
love that makes me uncomfortable
but so comfortable at the same time.
You are the rough yet gentle waves
and I the sobering sand.
washing over me,
taking some of me with you after every wave.
Oct 18, 2012
Oct 18, 2012 at 5:15 AM UTC
The light knocking
on my window
from the rain's tiny fist
may be the single,
most relaxing,
contemplative sound
in Mother Earth's
long and sobering life.
Oct 6, 2013
Oct 6, 2013 at 10:46 PM UTC
we did what we could that night
and a supernal being is ashamed.
this is the drift of thought
in the vast ocean of gilded gold
frothing at the edge of rotund:
giving back a silenced enigma,
spewing the answer in an exhaust
of white rancid smoke
dharma burns plastered to cigarette.
burning and burning, afloat are the high-pouncing embers looking for fleeting shades and dagger-ambulations
of a shadow's swagger in tectonic soiree.
we did what we could that night.
like a flash of lightning at the back
of hoarded hills,
or say, something brutal and brash with
modern sensibilities we never jell —
we come not with softness or life
peering out of our eyes like little girls
serenaded by mad men in the eve of
forlorn nights. we did what we could
and some god cringes, winces away
like the erratic dance of candleflame.
the leviathan black spreads its parasol
and we are no strangers.
when our veraciousness starts to pierce
the veil, the populace should start
to worry of their trapped conditions.
we came here for something:
be it flesh, be it wisdom, be it plain inebriations — we will never flinch
at the squalor of tomorrow's sobering.
keep in mind, kaibigan.
it's all levitation and transcendence.
the darkness wept as the car
groans near the end of its immaterial life.
i flick the last cigarette into the grey-faced pavement.
all oceans drowned,
all shadows burgeoned,
all fires emerged plump,
this silent radio rivers
through the wave of this ephemerality,
the onomatopoeia of strangeness,
the thud
of the senseless head of metal
on the body
the clackety-clack
of hours thereafter!
ayeayeaye! the streets sing no mild
appendage. the solstice is lost
in the length and precision of all things.
bringing ourselves to the brink of absence,
our pallid selves set ablaze, emblazoning
the quick life of matchflame or rumble of
thunder — the steady phoenix of
that night! this is learning
to breathe again, o, what currents purloined in vicious swarth as we keep
this river flowing into our throats,
jamming our souls to compelling music.
remember kaibigan,
it's all levitation and transcendence.
Oct 28, 2015
Oct 28, 2015 at 8:03 AM UTC
“Keep your nose clean”
His intent was momentous.
An ant like phrase,
with mountainous exorcism.
“Keep your nose clean”,
His voice like Zeus,
thunderously subtle.
Echoing and vibrating,
through regret, sin,
and fueled debauchery.
This phrase kept me true,
on-course through,
dark seas.
A map to navigate,
knowing when,
to steer away.
“Keep your nose clean”
I hear him still,
his voice sobering.
“Yes, grandfather.”
“I will”
Sep 9, 2021
Sep 9, 2021 at 9:36 AM UTC