The written battles...

I cry, inside.
I scream, on the other.

The feeling of separation from that which I should not have been,
has me feeling more alone than I'm used to.

The feeling of lostness and anger transpires in my bones and
flows its way through my already pained veins.

This, I suppose, is my reality.
To find my way in the place I've never belonged.
And might just never do...

I lost the only one who had a mind anything near my own,
The only one who knew my pains...

But even she left me behind.

On the days that I don't mind,
It's as if it had never happened.

On days like these...
It tears me apart like no one ever sees.

What does "family" even mean...

~Robert van Lingen
The day I wept,
Today I slept,
I swept aside that which kept me awry,
And I breathe a sigh of relief to those who listen.

The days I wept,
Long passed,
Long avast are my tears, the yearning and the burning,
Fears abound.

A year's past and I have found that which I thought I had all along.

Yet, today I am not blind to agony, the fight,
I remember that which I lost of myself,
Now regained in a new light.

Her name?

-Robert van Lingen
Written and Published on Wattpad 01-26-2016
When I give,
Everything I have and more...

My sleeplessness' solace,
Is buried in my dreams.

My world away from the world,
Where there are no more problems to solve.

In my dreams,
Life, is just a flow,

The effortless stream of events,
That I never have to think about again.

The blissfulness of the temporary,
Escape from my woes.

~Robert van Lingen
Once in a day I wake,
And once in a day I fall away.

Once in today I looked inside myself to find the ways I used to be.
Once in one day I still cannot see who I will be.

Once in two days I fall astray and I forget what I've meant to forget to remember.

I sway to the sounds of my approaching sleep,
Everything goes away.

One, in this way,
I slip,
I fade away into the peace I wish I'd find,
Every other day.

~Robert van Lingen
Just when I thought I was ashore,
My waves ***** once more,

Here I stare at the walls above,
Lying, aware of nothing more.

Just when I thought I was home,
Just when I thought I could be alone,

You came,
You grow,
In, and out of my fleeting realities,

I fly athunder'd by this reckless mind,
I fly, blunder'd into the past I'd thought I'd left behind.

Quiet, I say.
There's nothing left to say but,
Just wait.
There's no need to cry,

I'd merely thought I'd lost my way,
I just have to remember,

My yesterdays,
Will never be my tomorrows.

~Robert van Lingen
Curiosity killed the cat,

But a cat has nine lives,
And I have none.

What can we lose but time?

I've already lost my mind

~Robert van Lingen
Never let anyone make you think you're anything less than amazing,
   This is how we fought.

Think thoughtfully about why we're here.
  Why we are.

   Take me by my most scarred hand and I shall guide you with the lessons that burned me,
So you are spared.

   Welcome to my heart,
It is a warm place,
  But rather quite small.

I will guide you with my wounds,
  For reason only so you should not receive in kind.

Be brave,
  But be kind,
I will show you,

That a love is not consuming,
  So breathe easy.

I will teach you the love,

   Of the truest kind.


     Of the heart of a friend.
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