autumn mist rises
across the glazen waters
through the aspen grove

wee spinning spider
her webbing the line of time
laced with dew like pearls
the world magnified in spheres
I am caught in the beauty

Gust of wind;
so full of hope,
so full of promise.
A sickening sweetness-
turning up the dead leaves.
They catch in the cobwebs
of my idle mind.

green tea:
cool and mullen,
on my tongue,
reminds me to breathe

Midnight excursion
Streetlights of gold
So many treasures
The darkness unfolds

Silver leaves illumed
By the moons ghoulish glow
How many secrets does
The darkness know

Diamonds that shimmer
In the vast blackened sky
What next to this in
The darkness am I?

A little bug stares at me, eyes unblinking.
Should fear determine death be your fate?
I'd rather try to understand you.

Infinity is contained in a decimal.
Time speeds by,
and yet a moment can last forever.
The infinite within the finite.
There are a billion possibilities within you.

She, her,
Triggering a cascade
Of suicidal thoughts.
I am not enough.

in a mud pit.
around my ankles, saddled,
slowly advancing.
Moving is a lot of effort.
tired, I just want to lie yet
and let me sink.
low,
low,
low.
more into this swamp.
my body becomes numb.
extreme pressures,
now around my ribs
suppress breathing attempts.
this mist fills my brain and,
I cannot even whisper...

Being but men
what softness know we
tough it up
**** it in
let out not a peep

what do we know
of gentle
and fair

fear to be fair
how can it be fair
rip out your heart
strip your chest bare

Tender soul
what do you know
of grit
and glory
yet you make me whole

my river's run dry
eyes that can't cry
I need you so
help me to grow

being but (a) man
a softness I seek
hold me close
lie me still
let me be meek

Light runs the edge sharp.
A glance could slice your eyes.
The blade melts through air like hot iron;
with a deadly silence it glides,
until neck exposed, a head is claimed.
And the crows sing out their mockery

Thirsty waters,
lapping at the shoreline.
on those salty beaches,
of my sweet, sweet, Caroline.
The melting horizon,
pools in the bay.
From the grey clouds of storm,
sending down their rain.
Wet and heavy clothes,
stick against our skin.
But feet, light and merry,
running in the sand.

You read cheeper by the dozen once
and fell in love with a red head.
Now there are twelve of us.
Are you happy?
Is this what you really wanted?

I can't say childhood has been great,
knowing all you are is a number...
"hello I'm number 7"
lucky me.

They weren't ready for us.
I think dad hated me.
The neighbor next door seems nice.
He was the old grandfatherly type,

At least until he had you groomed...
Once he revealed his taste for children
it seemed too convenient for a little pig
to live next door to the big bad wolf.

Dad said I should have known better.
He told me that the wolf was
"too kind to a kid like you"
and that he
"gave out too much candy."
I should have known.
No one is ever that kind or sweet...

We moved,
and just kept moving.
Only ever a year in one spot.
I never made friends.
I had too many secrets,
and I was scared
they'd find out.

At 17 I got away.
And the secrets started slipping.
I was too tired to carry them anymore.
There wasn't anything to lose at this point anyway...


L
G
B
T
and a dash of
s
u
i
c
i
d
e
They say I'm hell bound...
Sounds like fun.
At least I'll get to live before I die.

Two faced,
You have no side.
Look in my eyes and tell me you care.
But that's just words...
Words, the tools of deception.
Use one to my face,
And another to my back.
Which of your words are sincere?

Deep blue waters.
The surface looms above.
Ever elusive, just out of reach.
A glint of light, blue-green,
shines down upon me;
like layers of thick glass.
  ∙
  ∙
  ∙
  °
  °
  °
I sit at the bottom.
Calm.