The colors
dance in waves
across the darkening sky;
a beautiful calm before the storm.
The kind of calm
the world only experiences
in the early hours of the morning
when everyone is asleep
before the weight of everything
comes crashing down on it.

My existence
Just
Feels
So
Heavy

Suddenly you transformed
Into a broken mirror.
All of the ugly, fragmented shards
Of my soul
Staring right back at me.

Leave it to the mind
Of a flower
To deny the beauty of
It’s own petals
Even though
It shares the same soil
As all of the others

I want to lay with you
Late at night
And exchange loving words,
The moon and the stars
Our only witness

Tonight
I stood in front of the mirror
Bottle in hand
The world as blurry as my feelings.
Someone please help me

You reached into my ribcage
And pulled out my heart
And the second it rested in your hands
It started to fall apart.
Everyone who’s ever held it
Broke it a little more
Leaving it more fragile
Than it ever was before.
My heart is way too delicate
And it has too many cracks
And the pieces didn’t fit quite right
When they were put back.
You took one look and made a face
And put it back into my chest
And said, “I’m sorry this will never work
But I wish you all the best”.
I wasn’t mad, I didn’t cry,
I was almost fine,
After all who could love
Such an ugly heart like mine.

As the smoke clears
I am left with the perfect image
Of the destruction I caused.
Here the air is heavy,
The weight of my mistakes
occupies all of the space in my lungs.
And tonight,
As I stand alone,
The urge to etch my flaws
Into my skin
Overwhelms me.
It craves the kiss of cold metal.
I am fighting a never ending battle
And my body keeps the score.

I am forever walking a tightrope
Between feeling nothing
And feeling everything.
I don’t know what’s worse,
Drowning in a sea of endless despair
Or never feeling the rain
Cleanse my soul again.

He leaves little wild fires
As he trails his fingers along my skin
And softly breathes life back into me.
Is this love?

He finds beauty
In all of the ugliest corners
Of my existence
And trails kisses on my scars
Sweetly,
Tenderly.
His lips plant flowers
In the cracks of my skin
Until nothing but beauty remains

It wasn’t until I met you
That I realized people
Are supposed to live
In your heart.
That’s why it has chambers.

I’m dying of starvation
For the love that I crave,
And the soul
That’s no longer mine

They say “eyes are the windows
To the soul”
And yours, my love,
Are made of stardust

In another life,
You’ll come home to me.
But for now I’ll just have
To miss you
In this one

And as I stand
Alone
In the dead of night
I will whisper
The immortal words
“I love you”
And hope a shooting star
Catches them on its way by
And brings them
To you.

I feel so broken
And alone.
My lungs are on fire,
The home you built inside my heart
Set ablaze
And my love for you crashes over me
Like waves.
Cold as they move through the space
In my chest that you once occupied.
And though strong and unforgiving,
Still unable to salvage the burning home.
And I am alone in the dark
Waiting for it
To consume me

The water rushes over her feet
And carries her away
On this dark
And stormy day
And her friends
They scream and shout and cry
As she tells
The world goodbye

And when your demons
Are stealing the air from your lungs
I will put my lips to yours
And breathe life
Back into you

I can distract myself
Long enough
To forget how much I love you
Until it’s 2 AM
And my restless thoughts
Echo your name.

I yearn for the warmth I felt
When I looked into your eyes
And for the strength I felt
In the fortress of your arms
And I search for the colors of the universe
That disappeared when you left

In you I found myself
And in you I lost myself

As I stand,
Staring out at the edge of forever,
Death approaches
Welcoming me home
With open arms
To a bed of eternal ease
And weightlessness.
All that’s left to do
Is let go

My scars run deep.
Memories of pain etched
Where the metal kisses skin.
Even though the pain
Doesn’t seep,
The guilt flows heavy
With the red waves
And shame wraps it’s arms
Around me like a blanket
As I stand gripping the scissors
Willing the world to just
Stop

She was an entire universe
In a single soul
But all he saw
Was a planet

The hardest part
Of letting you go
Is the fear that
I’ll lose myself too.

The rain is falling
And now I am falling too
All I want is you

The moon whispers stories of the stars
And I tell him tales of you,
The boy who stole my heart
And parted the clouds
To see the sun.

As I look at you
I fall in love with all of the things
I feared about my future
And for the first time,
I fell in love with the idea
Of getting there.

He was the kind of dream you fell into
And here I am
Wrestling many sleepless nights

My body feels
So hollow.
I never knew how heavy
Emptiness could be.

Like the summer rain, we fell.

Let **** go,
You can't see the world
If you're carrying it on your shoulders

I put my hand on my chest
Where my heart used to beat
The drum that it played
So soft and so sweet
Now it’s lefty empty
So hollow and cold
Just whispers of memories
Of the stories once told
The foundation is crumbling
The walls starting to crack
So I’ll just close my eyes
And let the world fade to black

The world has gone dark
No light to be seen
The best moments of life
Fade fast from the screen
The pain isn’t real
It’s all in my head
My body is living
But I’m already dead

Tell me,
Was my love not enough?
No, of course it was enough,
I loved you with everything I had.
You were just to blind to see it.
And now as your world keeps spinning on
Il be stuck standing still
Waiting for you to come unfreeze me

You beat my heart to dust
Then used it too make a wish
For the heart of another girl.

What happened to the little girl
The one who dreamed of fairytales
What happened to the little girl
Who played make believe
Who wanted to grow up to be an
Astronaut?
What happened to the little girl
Who thought the world to be a magical place
Who dreamed of reaching the stars and keeping
Them in a jar to light her way
Who dreamed of prince charming on white horses
Well she now lies in bed with tears streaming down her face
Begging to die.
She now paints pictures on her skin with a metal paintbrush
She's more broken than she is beautiful.
She no longer dreams of stars and fairytales
Now her only happily ever after is

Death

The worst part about it all
Is that it stings in the shower,
And I'm so sorry, if you're
One of the poor unfortunate souls
Who knows exactly what I'm
Talking about

I knew he didn't love me
But I adored him anyway
And even though my heart was screaming
I just couldn't stay away

I don't think my lungs like the taste of air anymore.

Maybe one day I can stop simply dreaming of happiness
and find it for myself.

Anyone else feel like they're
dreaming their lives away?

Anyone else sick of sleepwalking
through every day?

Maybe we were meant to fall together
Maybe we were doomed to fall apart.

Don't forget who you were
Before the world tore you apart.

Don't forget who you were,
Before the world told you
who you should be

In you I lost myself,
In you I found myself

His soul was as colourful as a rainbow
And I,
I,
Am black and white
With a little bit of grey

Without you
I can be me.
Without you
I can breathe.

You are the perfect song
I've never known how to write
And the melody
I have always been searching for.