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844 · Mar 26
9 to 5
one of my biggest fears is
that I'll work a 9 to 5 job
that I despise and drains me

I don't want to work a job that pays the bills
and is physically and emotionally draining
I want to do what I love and make good money

I know that that sounds naive
but I see the effects the menial job
that kills you slowly
taking everything out of you
with barely any energy at the end of the day
583 · Mar 3
tremors
tremors
the familiar anxious feeling
when I'm all alone
alone with my thoughts
the shadows creep in
gifting me tremors
tremors that capture my hands and legs
tremors that make my heart flutter and pound
tremors that terrify me
reminding me of that night
the night I tried to end it all
the memory gives me tremors
and terror
554 · Apr 9
Villains
Villains aren't born
they're made
they go through hell
they suffer and get beaten down
belittled and abused
abandoned and hurt
the pain turns into anger
the thirst for revenge
to make others feel the way they felt
I'm not saying it's right
just that I understand
I've been there too
but I made it out
and you can too
517 · 20h
soulmate
have I found my soulmate
it's too early to tell
but I know that I love him
maybe I'm rushing it
but I always fall hard and fast
it can be my downfall
but I experience unadulterated love
496 · Mar 18
Misfit
I am a misfit
and I'm okay with that
I mean, I have to be
I don't want to blend in
and be the same as everyone else
I don't like clean girl makeup
but it's okay if you do
I like bold makeup
and it's okay if you don't
I am unique and different
sure, it might be hard to make friends similar to me
but I'd rather have little to no friends
by being myself
than having lots of friends
by being someone else
I may be lonely now
but it's even lonelier being someone you're not
I'm a misfit
and I'm okay with that
430 · Mar 15
the sky's many faces
the sky so hauntingly beautiful
with all it's different faces
so pale and grey and somber
so vibrant and orange and joyous
so dark and purple and mysterious
so bright and blue and carefree
the sky has many faces
they change at will
with the change of the wind
the colors shift to show it's emotions
the sky so hauntingly beautiful
367 · Mar 25
Boxes
the day is approaching
faster and faster
the day I pack up all my stuff
put it into boxes
load it into the car
empty out my room
and drive for a couple of hours
I will unpack my life
into a tiny new room
that will be my home for a year
I'll look at my barren room
waiting to be decorated
and filled
I'll make it my own
no matter how I miss my home hours away
332 · Jan 31
cancerous
you were cancerous to be
leeching off of me
manipulating me
i'm not sorry for cutting you off
like a tumor growing on my skin
you had to go
i don't want to feel bad for getting help
but you made me guilty
i didn't deserve to hear you threaten suicide
im sorry i was busy
but i was helping someone in need
i cant talk 24/7
you made me feel bad for attempting suicide
saying you almost tried to as well
you never asked how i was feeling
you only cared about you
and the attention you got
so i'm not sorry for cutting you off
i need to be healthy
and you were not the kind i want to surround myself with
316 · Apr 29
crush
when I met you
I knew that there would
never be another you
I think of you on the daily
but alas
miles of roads separate us
my feelings are true
whether they're reciprocated
or not
there will never be another you
316 · Apr 7
Books
I love books
reading them
entering other worlds
filled with romance
and dragons
and magic
and anything you can imagine
so enchanting
the words transport you
into different dimensions
feeling what the character feels
experiencing what the character experiences
the words turn into images
that turn into a portal to the setting
when the book closes
reality slams into you
the rapid change in worlds is jarring
304 · Apr 7
How do I say Goodbye
how do I say goodbye
to my childhood
to a free roof over my head
to free food
to free everything
how do I say hello
to my new life
to adulthood
to paying for everything
to being even more independent
how do I transition from childhood
to adulthood
it seems terrifying
and exhilarating
295 · Apr 10
Introvert
I could be talkative if I wanted to
but I worry that I might say the wrong thing
or say too much
or be annoying
I don't want to be annoying or too much
I don't want to burden people with
spewing words out
I don't want them to feel obligated to listen
so instead I shut my mouth
and become the quiet kid
therefore I won't be bothersome
287 · Apr 11
love
obsessive or pure
deadly or wholesome feeling
suffer or embrace
282 · Apr 18
Summer
wet sand squelches between my toes
hot rays of sunshine beat against my skin
waves ripples in the lake
ice cream drips from the cone onto my hand
tank tops and shorts and swimsuits
sweet lemonade as the ice cubes clink in the glass
school's out and relaxing's in
walking through the cool forest
a relief from the sweltering sun
diving into the pool
and splashing your friends
refreshing breeze as the sun sets
282 · Mar 14
Uncertainty
I am uncertain
can I really do this
go to college
live on my own
make my own money
be an adult
get my license
I'm not ready
everything is happening so fast
I feel disoriented
will I ever feel capable
I can't do this
it's too much
just breathe
you can do this
anxiety captures me again
I don't know if I can do this
281 · Mar 27
New Beginnings
The noise in my head is getting louder
Blocking out the world
It’s an infection
Seeping into my veins
It increases my paranoia
Letting criticism push me down
I put on my “I’m fine” mask
And become a performer once again
My reckless behaviors that made me bleed
Are no longer me
I don’t want to die necessarily
I just don’t want to face my fears
And feel out of control
My soul is nervous
To be integrated into society
258 · Apr 29
to him
yes you're my crush
yes you make me blush
i love your smile
i think about it for a while
i want to hear your laughter
please don't let this end in a disaster
wrap your arms around me
let the love run free
i'm falling head over heels
you got me weak in the knees
you're so weird and quirky
and I feel unworthy
254 · Mar 20
Purple
Amethyst crystals shining in the sunlight
Violet skies in the dusky night
Lavender flowers arranged in a glass vase
Lilac clouds floating in the vibrant sunset
Indigo seas reflecting the dark sky
Plum fruits hanging from the sturdy branches
Fuchsia trees clustered in the deep forest
Magenta lipstick smeared across a smile
Orchid plants flowing in the cool breeze
253 · Mar 27
Spring Break
many people are going on trips
traveling to other states or countries
having a vacation
in the sun on the beach

me on the other hand
what am I going to do?

I will lay in bed all day
binge watch tv
cuddle with my cats
stay up late

I may not be doing what others are
but I will still be having fun
I'll enjoy my spring break
but in my own way
244 · Apr 10
Commotion
age 5-6 eating my dinner
mac n cheese with carrots
served on a Minnie Mouse plate

these was a commotion from my parents
a few feet away from me in the kitchen
screaming and yelling filled the house

I silently ate my food
then suddenly
she grabbed my plate
and threw it at the wall

shattered pieces of the plate
litter the floor
more commotion from them
childhood memory from the past
I no longer live with them dw
243 · May 6
shades of rainbows
deep red blood dripping onto the floor
bright red roses swaying in the breeze

orange prison jumpsuits walking in the yard
orange carved pumpkins on the porch

yellowed skin as kidneys fail
yellow sunshine streams through the window

dark green mold spores entering your lungs
vibrant green grass freshening the air

darkening blue ocean water pulling you under
clear blue sky calling peace to the turmoil

purple poison dart frog toxins seeping into your skin
purple flowers in bloom decorating the garden
230 · May 4
the road's pain
day after day it is the same thing
the cars drive on top of me
and the humans walk all over me
it hurts so much
the pressure and pain dig deep
until I crack and bleed
the working humans patch me up
but it does nothing to relieve the pain
the long expanse of body cries out in agony
it's the same thing
but I never get used to it
the cars yell and jeer at me
as they run me over
they take pleasure in my pain
why me
what did I do to deserve this
unless just existing targets me
for the torture I endure on the daily
224 · Apr 11
Friends
I have no idea how to make friends
I don't know what to say
or to talk about
I don't know if I talk too much
and will scare them away
I try my best
but I'm not sure if it's good enough
I want more friends
and I'm trying to put myself out there
advice is welcome
223 · Apr 21
loneliness
the loneliness glides over my skin
burrows deeps
and settles into my bones
no matter what I do
it never leaves
I could talk all day to everybody
I could have a million friends
but I would still feel the same
lonely
soul chilling loneliness
never ceasing
220 · Mar 14
why I do this
I have these complicated feelings
they unfurl in my chest
begging to be let out
I release them from the ribcage
with a pen and paper
my poems are their escape
it makes me feel lighter
like happiness can fill me
instead of the dark curling tendrils
of despair
220 · Apr 23
reality
reality is very jarring
it's so different from my books
I love the escape
all the different worlds I can experience
so much better than reality
218 · Mar 14
day by day
take it day by day
there will be ups and downs
but soon enough there'll be more ups than downs
life gets better day by day
one day might be low and sad
you might contemplate death
then the next day it will be a joy to live
so excited to do things and see people
take it day by day
things will change
it will get better
you just have to make through each day
216 · Apr 29
what is love
love is like a flame
it can make you warm
or it can burn you
love can caress you
or throw you to the wolves
love can find you your perfect match
or it can find you someone
who'll never give you their time of day

i want to find love
a love that is reciprocated
a love that is gentle and passionate
a love that picks me up
a love that is the one for me
who can laugh at my dumb jokes
who can see me for me
who can show me the good in the world

i always seem to find the love that hurts
a love that beats me down
a love that hates me for me
who only loves the idea of me

maybe this time will be different
211 · Apr 11
Happy
bright
cheerful
delighted
blissful
ecstatic
elated
overjoyed
glee­ful
i made a friend!!!!!
199 · Mar 20
Dear Younger Self
You've gone through a lot
that much is true.
You've attempted to end your life
the outcome never as you wanted.
But soon enough you'll appreciate life
and the joys of being alive.
The road to recovery is a tough and long one
but it's one you're willing to take.
You haven't self-harmed in over 80 days
I know you can't fathom that.
Self-harm was your lifeline
in the awful house you lived in.
Yes, past tense, lived in
you escaped that hell of a house.
Your siblings have not
but they were always favored more.
You don't have many friends
but the ones you do are amazing.
Sadly, those friends live far away
but when you see them,
it's like you were never apart.
You still struggle with mental health
but you're getting better and stronger.
Life is more enjoyable now
even though we never wanted to be alive this long.
Maybe it's a good thing I'm still alive.
- Liam
199 · Apr 15
Trigger Warning
the night I tried to end it all
replays in my head
every single **** day
it tortures me
makes me relive it
I don't want to remember that night
the pounding heart
and the heart ceasing beating
the puke
the shaking and trembling
the hyperventilating
and the not breathing
I relive it everyday
I just wish it would leave me alone
I don't want to remember the misery
the dying
the pain on my parent's faces
it terrifies me when I think about that night
199 · Mar 15
Hello Poetry
I write my heart out
my feelings I was beginning to doubt
then I came here
filled with fear
but came my way was not abuse or hate
it gave me the motivation to create
so kind a community
my heart no longer performed an emotional mutiny
I bared my soul to this place
your kindness shone onto my face
you have all been so nice
and it didn't come with a price
I finally found my community
198 · Apr 17
Words
the letters form in my head
colliding to form words
but they don't make sense
and the page stays blank
just when I think I've got it
it wiggles out of my grasp
and writer's block wraps me
in its shackles
191 · May 5
healing
I am the flower growing in between cracks in the sidewalk
185 · Apr 8
Home
they say home is where the heart is
then my heart must be a nomad

my heart is with my mom's ****** jokes
with my dad's infectious laughter
with my mom's kindness
with my dad's dumb humor
with my cats and their spunky attitude
with the sunsets setting the sky ablaze
with every word I write
pouring out of my soul

they say home is where the heart is
then my heart must be a nomad
because I find something to love in everything
184 · Mar 13
soulmates
one day I'll find my soulmate
I'll marvel at their eyes
so blue and deep like the ocean with waves that brush up against the damp sand
or so green and mysterious like the endless forest with echoes of birds calling out to each other
or so brown and bright like the earth that brings forth life and beauty
I'll write poems about their smile and their laugh
like the sun shone from their lips like the sound of ecstasy
I'd write never-ending ballads about their heart
so abundant with love
a kind word to say about everybody
one day I'll find my soulmate
and I'll love them like they've never been loved before
182 · Mar 26
Eyes
eyes
the window to your soul
such gorgeous objects
that hold onto my heart

the beautiful deep abyss of darkness eyes
the enchanting sea blue of the clear sky eyes
the gorgeous forest green of nature-loving eyes
the captivating honey-colored sunshine eyes
the stunning earth-toned life-breathing eyes

all eyes are beautiful to me
no matter the color
178 · Apr 18
Spring
morning dew coating the fresh grass
pitter pattering rain showers
green foliage growing on trees
flowers budding in gardens
sun shining in a cloudy sky
the air chilly and warm
nature rebirth
dancing in the rain
jumping in mud puddles
basking in the rays of light
177 · Apr 29
invisible
sometimes i feel invisible
either like everyone looks through me
like i'm not there
or like they see my appearance
and don't look further

i am a person too
my identity matters
see me for me
see me in the room

i feel like an outcast
a social pariah
like i'm a wallflower
171 · Mar 5
12 year old me
Staring at my reflection
Thinking that I’m dumb
And picking out every flaw I own
Staring into the distance knowing I’m wrong
Tearing myself apart and not eating a crumb
Trying to lose weight and walking endlessly
To try and scare the pounds away
Disappointing my bio mother and not making her proud
All I want from my parents are love and acceptance
But instead I get backstabbed
Blocking out reality and staying up ‘till midnight
Writing stories and leaving them unfinished
I wish to be heard but I’m left in the dark
Crying in my sleep and being abandoned
Complaining that it isn’t fair won’t make it better
168 · 5d
anxiety creature
the anxiety creature
made up of slime and ooze
with sharp claws
that dig into my mind
trying to drag me down with it
whispering in my ears
making me tremble
and ruminate
i try to run and escape it
but it always catches up
i won't stop running from it
soon enough it will tire
and i will be free
166 · Mar 16
suffer
as I travel along my healing journey
a thought nags in the back of my mind
what if my poems suffer
because I'm no longer suffering
what if my pain made masterpieces
and without it I'm nothing
what if I lose my writing ability
because I lost the agony
I don't want to suffer
but poetry is such a big part of me
my pain made it flourish
but what if I cannot do that any longer
I want to be known for my poetry
what am I without it
my pain helped my art
it made the words fly
out of my mind
but I will not let pain be my only motivator
I will find beauty in the world and in myself
164 · Mar 18
a poet never a poem
yes, I'm a poet
and I'm proud of it too
but reality sinks in letting me wallow in self-pity
I'll always be the poet
never a poem
I'll write about their eyes
their laugh
their perfect imperfections
but no one will capture my laugh
my smile
my beautiful flaws
I will always be a poet
but never a poem
I will write about beauty and grace
about love and heartache
but no one will turn me into a poem
I am stuck giving people words
and never getting any in return
163 · Apr 10
Graduation
the day is nearing close and closer
the day I wear my cap and gown
and walk down the stage
and get handed my diploma
the day I no longer attend high school
the day I leave this town behind
to start my new life
and new beginnings
162 · Mar 26
sadly, just a dream
I tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear
you cup my jaw
and bring my lips to yours
our legs intertwined
I kiss you like my life depends on it
our breath becomes one
your warm body presses against mine
then I wake up all alone
in my bed
the room dark
loneliness creeps in
sadly, it was just a dream
single af sadly
161 · Apr 30
save yourself
i cried out for help
my head bobbing up and down
as the waves threatened to pull me under
no one heard my pleas for rescue
my body grew tired
and i started sinking
water filled my lungs
and my vision began blackening
i floated at the bottom of the ocean
then suddenly
a rush of energy surged through my limbs
i swim to the surface
and fresh air never felt sweeter
before i know it
i'm at the shore
i flop onto the sand
and relax
with the knowledge
that no one will save you
save yourself
161 · Apr 11
Talking
at school not a word leaves my mouth
but if I decide to talk
I end up regretting it
my anxiety flares up
my face feels hot and prickly
my back heats up
my hands begin to tremble
my heart pounds in my chest
my breathing quickens
my surroundings don't feel real
so I press my lips together
and let myself stay the quiet kid
157 · Mar 15
Goodbyes and Hellos
what if I'm so anxious
because I'm focusing on all the things
I'll say goodbye to
when I could be thinking about
all the things I'll say hello to
I'm saying goodbye to lots of things
but I'm saying hello to even more
156 · Apr 9
listen
sometimes when I talk
my brain moves faster than my mouth
leading to jumbled up words and stutters
most people don't care what I have to say
so I stay silent
barely a word slips from my lips
you can say I'm shy
but what do I have to say
if nobody listens
155 · Feb 27
Him
Him
why do I think of you still
it feels like you control me even when we're no contact
I don't miss you I tell myself
you were evil and violent and controlling
I don't miss you
I miss the idea of you
the idea of comfort and romantic love
but that isn't you
I want softness and gentle love
you cut me with your sharp edges and your harsh words
I won't go back to you, I can't
yet I still think of you and it's torture
I'll admit I'm lonely
but I need to keep my standards
a violent lover is no lover of mine
not anymore
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