But I must say
Petty looks good on you
Why don’t you make it rain
Since you think you’re so cute

I wish to tell you off
To tell your tainted truth
But I ain’t got the time
To waste my voice on you

Wake up to find it’s gone
It’s gone for good
The old way is gone
It’s a new neighborhood

Nothing’s quite the same
Same old rules
New twisted game
No feelings save for hate
No love to contemplate

I’m blind without what I need
Without it I’m all alone
I don’t feel safe
Can I learn to call you home?

Burning glory,
Of such I’ve never seen.
Warmth,
Of which I’ve only dreamed.
Such light,
To shine upon the sins.
Thick smoke,
To choke the loss to win.
Who wins?
They win.
White ash,
To remind of your decay.

Crows fly,
Their carrion play.
They clap,
A murderous parade.
They bleed,
Yet they don’t so who’s to say?
I say,
You say.
Who wins?
They win.
A pause.

The next day is still.
Marrow,
***** upon the hill.
Who knows,
What happened on that day?
The monument,
To remind the price to pay.
We’ll pay.
They’ll pay.
I say,
You say.
Who wins?
They win.
They always win.

They’re just walking by
Idle sticks and logs and twigs
Wayward trees passing to and fro
In their forests of isolation
The birds don’t sing there
If they do
Then each tree hears its own tune
My tree is cut
Just a stump
Just my luck
I have no birds to sing anyway
Accept for this one wayward jay
It’s less of a song
More of an ironic cackle
Laughing at my stump
Chained to this rusted shackle
There used to be a song
Sweet like sugar
Bitter like sole cinnamon
But harmonious
Lovely
Divine
Mine
Now I’m just walking by
An idle stick
A log
A twig
A wayward tree stump
Just my lonely luck

Go.
Pounce now.
Trap your prey
In jowls of fanged, dangerous mercy.
It's brutal.
Yet a kindness.
Your coat of reflection,
And piercing blue eyes of trepidation,
And legs of boundless lightning
With a voice of deep white thunder.
The envy of it all.
You stalk and watch,
and sing
Such a song.
Haunting.
Pure.
A calling.
Calling to home.
Lost in the snow
To the naked eye,
But not lost at all.
The cold greets you.
Like you, sweet and cruel.
Take form.
Take chase.
Claim the Winter Kingdom to rule.

Your music haunts my ears
And steals my soul
A staccato whimpering glow
The audience claps
Ovation
Relax
The show's over now
Go home to danger
And commune with your total stranger

So long, my heart, so long
If lies could heal
Spoken English would ****
Telling the truth
Never lasts for too long
Maybe someday you’ll try
And learn how to cry
Like you really mean it
Feel how I need it
It only lasts for so long

So long, my love, so long
If hands could heal
Calluses would ****
Emoting for you never lasts for too long
A hug
A kiss
Feelings I miss
Is it asking too much
Just to feel a real touch?
It only lasts for so long

So long, my trust, so long
Though you’re almost gone
Your shadow won’t linger
Next to me anymore
It’s been faded for so long
Return beyond
Throw in the towel
Never come back
For this day, I’ve been prepared
For so long
You’ve been gone so long

Help

I'm falling

In falling water

The lie is cold

And drives my soul

Sick irony takes a stroll

Down the black

I'm alone

In this winsome hole

That leads to the fall

To depths of icy gall

Monsters are at the bottom

They'll eat me

They'll maul

Help

I'm writhing

In the ice of the sun

But to me

It's a glacier

The falling water ends here

Oh no

I'll freeze

This is where I die

No


Longer



Me




Goodbye
I love you

They think I'm rich
They think I'm wealthy
They think I'm a saint
That I'm healthy
They think that they know
What it means to be me
Oh no
No they don't understand me
Not at all

They think I'm lost
They think I'm drifting
They think I've no cause
That I'm sinking
They think that they can see
What it means to be me
But they can't even see me
Oh no
No they don't understand me
Not at all

In denial of the homicidal
In my mind

Who did I ****?
Eternally enveloped in ectoplasmic ethereal Blood
That’s not really there
It returns to the air
There’s no body here
Oh no
I’m empty I
I
I
Wait
He didn’t die

What did I ****?
I can’t possibly be aroused by empty notions
That’s not really true
It remains in the air
And the pieces are here
Oh no
I’m full I
I
I
Wait
Those aren’t mine

I sit and shine
With a smile inside
Fat with the deeds that abide
So say it
Shout it
Scream

I killed myself

Double homicide
I can’t deny
It’s not what you think
The old me long dead
The new me is too
The only me is now
Morning
Night
And noon

Pause
One beat
Two beats
Three beats
Four

I’m empty
I’m bleeding
I’m carnal
I’m sore

Five beats
Six beats
Seven beats
Eight

My sins
Can’t win
But I’m already late

Driving up slowly...
Park across the street.
Nobody should know where we meet.
Walking up slowly...
Wishing I was drunk.
At least that would explain my funk.

Now I’m peering,
Peeling off my skin.
There’s no healing;
It’s a game you can’t win.

Now I’m driving up slowly...
And making myself go home.
The things I do,
To let myself roam.
Now I’m driving up slowly...
Two hours before I’m home.
All this effort...
And nothing to show

Writing silently...
The words aren’t coming
Like I planned.
I pray someday that someone understands...
Because I don’t.

Driving alone,
Driving alone.
Home is not so lonely...
When I’m driving up slowly.
So, I’m coming home.
Yes, I’m coming home.

The sun begins to rise,
Shining regret on a grown man's cries.
He knows he's irresponsible.
He wraps around the pole of knowledge-all.
There's a child who says
"I tried".
Regret on one shoulder,
Regret on the other.
A new day to bear new lies.
The ledge looks ever so tempting...

Stay where you are.
Locked in arrogant infancy,
You try to scream, but you stop.
You try to cry but drop
To your knees,
Begging to the unseen.
No more.

Hail the King of Fools.
The devils laugh and scorn.
Through chains, more fears are born.
You try to scream, but you stop.
You can't breathe.
Fighting the unseen.
No more.

Enslaved by your fears,
You try to scream, but you stop.
You cry.
You beg.
You breathe.
You squeal.
No more.

It never fails.
All hail Generation Tongue In Mouth.
Let them go.
For they don't want you now.
It's a shame,
A weak man's game.
Let them go.
Don't you know Generation Tongue In Mouth?
Go ahead,
Break connection now.
That's just how it goes sometimes,
Don't take it personal.

Vitality,
A color of light.
More blatant in the dark.
We all seek it,
But we can't see it.
It's listened for,
But unheard of.
So bundle up,
It's cold outside.
You will freeze in your stride.
The weight of your grin
Will keep you here.
And all that is dear
Will become folly.
I am folly.
I am your folly.
And I will see to it
That you will never see
The color of vitality.

Roses, bullets, and a Bible
Guided my life
A shine for my light
My happiness was never trifle
My smile was bright
My heart was kind

   Roses, bullets, and a Bible
   Blind my light
   Pervert my sight
   Not prepared for Blue
   Not by a mile
   But lost, through and through
   Youth's too cruel
      
      Roses, bullets, and a Bible
      Broken shards
      Build my scars
      Happiness is only trifle
      But maybe I'm still good
      I hope I can still be good

Perfectly imperfect
I’m that kind of man
Happily unhappy
That’s how I stand
Chaotically peaceful
That’s my jam
Jovial anger
Is that what I am?
Obedient resistance
It’s time for a renaissance

I am somebody’s son.
Isn’t that just
Unfortunate.
That I can bear the weight of,
The sins of,
The cries of,
A father,
A mother,
A sister,
A brother.
Someday, I’ll be something else.
Forgotten, perhaps.
Or remembered as a martyr.
How ironic;
Through my freedom,
My crisp clean kingdom,
I am trapped.

How dare you
Pillager
Plunderer
Robber
Vandal
Thief
Lover
Mine
How dare you reduce me to rage
White hot and safe
Safe for my plate
From which I consume mounds of animosity
For the atrocity
For on that afternoon
I died
And I'm still not alive
Because of you
Because you were mine
You were my lover
My thief
My vandal
You robbed my heart
But then plundered my dignity
And pillaged my sou
How
Dare
You

Mince your words,
You've done it before.
Bow like you're in the presence of Royalty.
He's royal.
Lording over you, after all.
But he's short.
They're all short.
Yet you...
The self-proclaimed miser,
King of the words,
You have nothing of substance to say.
What a plot twist.
What a change.
You weakling.
Confidence doesn't suit you.
It doesn't match your eyes.
Hypocrisy, a great design on you.
It brings out the color
Of your lies.

Splash
What’s that?
Splash
How’s that,
Splash
Possible?
Splash
Plausible?
Splash
Splash
Downpour.
­It rains here,
Yet the sky is clear,
And the ground is dry.
No spots in the sky.
Yet it rains...
It rains.
It rains.
Red
Black
Thick
Red
No...
It’s blood
And I feel
Drained
It’s my blood
Falling from the sky
Coming from a monster
Previously slain
Yet like this ground,
I feel so dry.
Run
I run
I run faster
And faster
He’s behind me
He’s gaining
He’s in front of me
And he says
Smile.
Flash
The ground is gone
I fall down, down, down
And upon my head
Appears a crown
With the inscription
“Little Reprobate”
He flies above me
He says Hi.
Tells me to smile
And I fall
There are shackles on my feet,
Pulling me into the sea.
Shards of silver,
With broken glass,
Litter the sea floor.
Stop.
He swims like a shark
Stop!
He reminds me,
In the cold I’m coming for you.
STOP
I should have known
There’s no peace in the pond
STOP!
The broken glass glues as one
It forms a door,
To another shore,
With a doorbell
DING ****!
DING ****!
DING ****!
I ring frantically
He opens the door and says
Die.
I SAID STOP!
You little fool.
Flash
I’m back,
I’m home
In this prison of innocence known.
Here he has no Red Throne.
For I’ve seen with my own eyes,
Dark places are my reprise.

Who died and made me king?
Who burns my Icarus wings?
I can't afford such dreams.
They take,
They steal,
They seek.
Well, I'm no king.
Specifically, not your king.
But I dare to dream.
And I strive to sing.
Through wingless flight
I gain my stride
At altitudes high,
As the shackles start to sink.
I'm no king.
I'm no king.
But still, I dare to dream.
I need those things

Why do you hate me
Only to hurt me
You’re incapable of painful feelings
You need to love me
You need to need me
Convince yourself that I’m the love you seek
You shouldn’t see me
You shouldn’t know me
Like the earth you quake as you’re shifting
You need to want me
You need to need me

Because

Your broken soul
Has become infested
Don’t force your way close to me
Just because you’re
Socially rejected

No?
Yeah.

You’ll never hear me
You’ll never steer me
You parasite
Without me, you’re nothing
But you’ll never forget me
And you’ll always regret me
For I’ve become a better you

I AM the river that roars
And razes lost souls
I am hard
Cold as arctic ice
Yet free running liquid
I will teach you

To live for yourself is free
Others need not impede

I AM the sound that rings and screams
And sears your ears
But your screams are silenced
By my vicious jeers
I will teach you

Live with fruitful abandon
Bury those who disgagree

I am the darkest most vile maw
My breath fresh
My teeth unseen
I will teach you
I will disappoint you
And then, I'll smile

I know your soul
Worst and best
I am vengeance
Stray, and you're next

Ding ****!
I’m home!
Let me in!
Out here, it’s cold as sin.
I’ve missed all of you.
Hello?
I see you...
You can’t hide through!
Ding ****!
Ding ****!
It’s cold out here...
Clouds come from my mouth.
I’m sorry I’ve been away.
I’ve been gone
So long...
But I’m back now!
Ding ****!
Ding ****!
Ding ****!
This isn’t funny anymore!
This game has quickly turned to bore!
This is my home for
goodness sake!
I see you all in there!
Why can’t you...
Can’t you...
You can’t.
You can’t see me.
You can’t hear me.
You forgot me.
I’ve been gone
So long...
But I’m back now!
I’ll help you remember me!
We’ll be reunited family!
Ding ****!
Ding ****!
Ding ****!
Ding ****!
Wait…
Oh no…
It’s him!
He’s found me again!
Behind the rock!
Behind the tree!
The Red Man still follows me!
He’s staring at me!
You can’t let him take me!
I lament for all the wrongs
I’ve wrought.
I repent for the false treasures
I’ve sought.
I’ve been gone
So long...
But I’m back now!
Let me in!
Save me from HIM!
DING ****!
DING ****!
DING ****!
DING ****!
DING ****!
This house is so pristine.
So perfect clean white.
And I the lone smudge as the first
Sign of blight.
But if you’d open the door...
Just open the door.
Save me before he comes!
I can be clean!
I’ve been gone
Too long...
Oh no he’s coming!
And I can’t keep running,
Running from red.
Don’t leave me to waste.
Please open,
Make haste!
DING ****!
DING ****!
DING ****!
DING ****!
DING ****
DING ****!
DING –
…
..
.
gone

Breathe
In
Out
Again

You’re safe
You’re warm
You’re home again

You’re safe and sound
You’re still around
Your soul is found

Bent low on the ground
Your face became shroud
But the water
Her water
His water
Their water
It loved you
It cleaned you
It sailed you home

The clearest water you’ve ever seen
The perfect temperature so keen
Your thirst is gone

The familiar man in the distance
Clad in Red
You’ve escaped his vengeance
His game is dead
Dead by the wondrous sword

You stare at him
He stares back so glim
Then he bows
Accepting your win
Then he’s gone
Gone forever
Happy endeavors

If the beat of the drum
Is the rolling thunder,
And the lull of the flute
Is cheap defense,
How does the music keep me
Asleep inside?
Perhaps the conductor
Is a wicked protector.
And the orchestra summons
The wayward ******.
So look me in the eye
And sing the songs.
My own civil war was right all along.
Because only on the inside,
War is song.

The cleansing
The clean clear cleansing
It’s necessary
The heavy of the day is gone
Pushed down by soft swift hands
The breath is warm and inviting
Such sweet warm encompassing breath
This breath kisses the glass gently
And it kisses me
And I’m covered
And then
And only then I know
I am clean
And I am free

I did this
I let the monster in
I let the demons win
I am pain
Void of gain
Leave me
Hate me
Loathe me
****** me

light

If I deserve life
Then Monster wouldn't have touched me
Monster would have let me be

light it

But instead
I am dead
Monster is merciful master of misery
How lucky

light it up

LIGHT!
IT!
UP!

LIGHT IT UP!
LIGHT IT UP!
LIGHT IT UP!

FLASH

what?
what's that?

A ship in the night?
Did it hear my wet cry?
It sails back
Back to the sunrise
Back to me
Don't ****** my pain
Don't ****** my misery
Let it be
Let it be
Let them be
Let them see

I need
A break
To just be

I didn't do this
All monsters come in
And sometimes
They will win
But only the battles
Never the wars
YOU own this ship
This voyage is YOURS

If I'm to survive
I'll stay in MY ship
I won't drown again
On this night, I live

It's so cold
Here
In this dank wet prison
Where the Blue-Haired Monster
That fiend
That monger
Loves me with grave danger
Trapped in an unstable manger
My own maelstrom brought me down
He killed me
And He revived me
Then He'll **** me again
He doesn't talk
He speaks in giggles
Cold
Wet
Giggles
... no
With cold
wet
spindly fingers
no
and a tongue
of vile
vanity
No
The vanity drips
All over my face
Such a horrid taste
NO
NO!
DO YOU HEAR ME?
I
SAID
NO!

boom

NO!

boom

NO!

SET!
ME!
FREE!

clap

Thund­er and lightning
My Angel of Blue sings
A song that parts the sea
The rain of my pain
Works for my gain
A hurricane
The Blue Man can't see
My Angel of Blue wasn't dead
She was waiting for me instead
Through the waters
I rise
My salt water cries
Bring me to distant shores
His maelstrom traps me no more

Draw the curtain
I’ve learned my lesson
To keep little dreams
In plain sight
Spin the clay wheel
And find your real deal
Keep little thoughts
In your mind
Of Little Heaven
Family, star-side

Pick up on your textbook grace
Install your happy face
Remember life is both for sinners and saints
Go on, put your white dress on
Sing with your purity song
Too delicate to string along

Wear long sleeves and hide your face
Don't squeal on the man to blame
It's not your fault, you did nothing wrong
Go on, put your red dress on
Dance with your impurity song
Don't be ashamed to cry all night long

Pick up on your textbook grace
Roll up your sleeves
Fix your face
We always sin while learning how to be saints

Remember your textbook grace
Remember your happy face
Don't let a stupid boy define your fate
Please don't put that black dress on
There's no solace in the dark
The dead tell no lies
Please choose to stay alive
Choose to stay alive
Stay alive

What’s hard is easy
What’s easy is hard
Just like slitting a finger
On a wayward shard

What hurts comes easy
What comes easy hurts
It comes clean to us all
Like a secret to blurt

What hurts can be hard
What can be hard hurts
It’s a long tug of war
And it’s never your turn

You have a choice
Make it
Either way it will sting
I just hope it’s the right one
So we can hear you sing

Excuse me, Good sir
Excuse me, Kind Lady
But a piece of me is gone
Have you seen it lately?
I can't describe shape
Nor for
Nor feel
Without it I'm lost
No steering
No wheel
Perhaps you have it some
Though not quite like mine
Everyone has it
To avoid dark decline
The darkness is friendly
Now that I've lost it
I don't like it
Yet I do
Bittersweet like dark chocolate
But wait
There it goes
How it's flown so far
To catch up to it
I must collapse like a star
I guess then they'll see
I guess then they'll know
What happens when you lose
The untouched part of your soul

I have nothing to say.
No words to write;
My brain is blank.
No rhythm to recite.
Why?
Why can’t I talk right now?
I’ve got so much to say.
And yet, I can’t say enough.
The old words have no meaning.
The new words have no value.
Besides...
Words can’t say much;
Actions talk so much more.
And words today have no final say,
Actions stage the show.
But I know you’re too close.
You’re too close.
What can I say to make my heart stay?
I really don’t want to know.

Or maybe the current can take me away.
For upon this stiff plane,
I don’t know where I’ll stay.
The path is familiar,
Yet still it is long.
A recluse come true.
A lonely man’s song.
The trees aren’t foreboding,
They welcome me home.
This is the real peace that I’ve longed to know.

Come
Come one
Come all
Gather 'round and gather here
Listen close and settle near
For on this day
Authority is interrupted

I've come as close as any man
Can get
To stealing his own shadow
What?
Divine throwback
A crime so small
It's never shed

Come
Come far
Come wide
Sit on grounds of moss and stone
Observe sinful musings to atone
For on this night
I disrupt authority

I've gone as far as any man
Can go
To shatter down my broken soul
What?
Opaque treasure
A ruse so slick
it's never seen

Come
Go
Be broken
Be whole

You want to go where the cool kids go
You covet that old time rock and roll
Make a difference
Build a city
Run right to the top
And get rich-filthy
But if you think you represent high society
Allow for me to serve you some reality
When you think you'll finally have resting time
Hang it all, you'll be stuck with five ex-wives

You crave to go where celebrities go
Something us poor kids will never know
You want to make a difference
Change history
Something new of yourself
A new kid to be
But if you think success will raise you up early
Life will move right through you, thick as it can be
If you think you can make it home on time
Find your light
And shut it down.
You'll be alright

Blank
Dark
Path
Silence
Where am I?
What is this box?
It’s black
Black as pitch
Yet with a mounting sense of dread
I can tell its true color is red
Red like Him
Help me
Somebody help me
Please

Yesterday you took the morsel not for you
Only now do you see your mistake
Underneath lies years to recall your fears

Blank
Dark
Path
Can I be forgiven?
When by sin I am smitten?
The Red Man
On his Red Throne
Laughs and scoffs
Taking no pity for me in this box

Listen close, my son, and know
Indeed there is one true way home
Take the sins left in your wake
Take the faults you try to forsake
Lift them high above your head
Enable your soul to no longer be dead

Blank
Dark
What’s that sound?
The box is closing in
The Red Man’s wicked grin
Frightens me to know
This box is mine and mine alone

Flee this place and never look back
Only a deep few have realized their lack
On this my voice you’ll be free of this place
Learn your lesson or stay in Red Space

Blank
The Red Man’s vile smile
His face inches above mine
In this box
I can’t move
I can’t cry
But I do

Silence
The silence is broken
By my woeful wails
Forgive me, my family
I deserve this Red Jail

Path
I can see it
The path’s been made clear
The Red Man has lost
I’ve beat him this year

Dark
The box shines
The Red throne turns to glass
The darkness is gone
The Red Man is last

Blank
Blank
Blink…

… I’m free
The box is no more
The Red Man unseen
On this luminous path
I travel along
There’s room for me now
So I travel in song

Whoosh...
Whoosh...
That dastardly devilish deviant wind!
It blows on my face
Without my permission!
How can I humble my mediocre mission,
When I have no space?
**** this horrid wind!
And then int he tunnel I choke!
I'd cry but it's dry.
There's no way that I can cope.
All I can do now is mope!
Or maybe I could just rescind,
And live in the name of the wind.

And on that night he learned
Never look towards the storm
Unless you're ready to give your fiercest battle cry
And charge right inside
And **** it through its eye

Some grow old,
Some die young.
Some favor the moon,
To the warmth of the sun.
Few live it through,
To cold temperatures.
But all can burn,
All can burn.

What do I tell
About the blue deep inside me
Deep
Inside
Me
Outside
I smile
But inside
I'm indigo
But few know
Few can know
I can't take their pitchforks
I can't be ostracized
At least not tonight
I can't tell you
You'll find me a fool
I can't tell them
They won't comprehend
I can't tell them
He'll abandon my sins
I can't tell her
She'll see me and swerve
So...
...Who do I tell?...

Everyone coming and going
Right past me
Not realizing
I pay attention to everything