When you look at me
Just what do you see?
Do you see someone beautiful
Loving and free?

Do you see an intelligence
Witty and smart?
Or someone creative
And gifted at art?

Or perhaps, perhaps,
Perhaps I'm a failure.
Maybe I'm stupid,
And ugly, and bland.
Maybe you hate me.
Maybe everyone should.

Or maybe,
If you hate me,
I'm misunderstood.

Even if you love me
If we get along
You still might not,
Likely don't know me at all.

#love   #hate   #misunderstood   #mystery   #me  
4 hours ago

These past few years you have made me forget that I am still fire
I am still strong and powerful and capable
You have done your best to take all the best parts of me
and turn them into something useful only for you
but there is still that roaring heart inside my chest

For awhile I forgot that I used to be hell on wheels
miss independent with a kick in my step
ready to take on the world with an iron fist
I used to be the girl who rolled over men like you
put them in their place and said forget it

I am a volcano erupting
An ocean of feelings that are okay to feel
The loud parts of me are what make me burn beautifully
The parts of me you don't like me to show are okay too
I shouldn't have to be quiet about my flaws
because love is supposed to accept them anyway
if love is even what we can call this anymore

When my insecurities come out you leave welts on my skin
from being so hateful towards my most fragile pieces
when I am breaking you only help me shatter
by throwing stones big enough to break down whole buildings

All of me that makes me who I am is not appreciated by you
it is NOT fair for me to live hiding and walking on eggshells
to make sure you are happy, the only one of us who apparently matters
supposed to be partners in this life instead I am your servant

but Oh you are never wrong, you never want to hear it when I am bleeding my heart out all over the floor
I am a mess you just step over because heaven forbid you get your shoes wet

#poem   #feelings   #truth   #life   #hurt   #relationship   #real   #me   #angry   #powerful  
4 hours ago

To whom I hate:
If I truly knew you
I wouldn't hate you
Such is life.

#love   #self   #life   #hate   #you   #me   #myself   #knew   #truly  
4 hours ago

You never see how I live off coffee and sweat
while you sit and do nothing
complaining of how tired you are from a day of work
like my problems do not even come close to comparing to yours

you speak to me like I am supposed to be who you want me to be
and if I am not, I am nothing
if I am not this idea you have of who I am
you get so angry
you spit vile at me in your words and hit deep in my bones

You dismiss the parts of me that are beautiful
you only take for granted the me I share with you
not knowing there is a mountain of girl underneath
this shell I dont feel you deserve
You wouldn't appreciate her anyway

You have used me up and hung me out to dry
and still expect me to give to you when you want
whatever it is you selfishly want this time
ignoring the fact that I NEVER get what I want
let alone what I deserve

#feelings   #truth   #sad   #life   #relationship   #me   #selfish   #personal  
9 hours ago

The great fear
that I have is,

that one day
my loneliness

#alone   #leave   #night   #me  
Delta Swingline
Delta Swingline
14 hours ago

Day or night?
Video or audio?
Wake up or keep dreaming?
Move on or turn back?
Tomorrow or yesterday?
Now or never?
Too much or not enough?
Lifted up or put down?
Shut in or shut out?
Step forward or step back?
Forgive or forget?
Ahead or behind?
Real or fake?
Control or chaos?
In your head or in your heart?
Off beat of in sync?
Accept or deny?
Save or sacrifice?
Together or alone?
Yours or theirs?
Blood or water?
Everything or nothing?
Beginning or end?
Taken or given?
Live or die?
Your fault or mine?
Your choice or no choice?
Surrender or fight?
Different of the same?
Run back or run away?
Anxious days or sleepless nights?
Shining in the spotlight of hidden in the shadows?
Say something or stay silent?
Inner strength or outer strength?
Keep or abandon?
Bitter or sweet?
Cut off or connect?
Cooperate or compete?
Relief or risk?
Jump or fall?
Stay or go?
Preserve or burn?
Cold as ice or hot as flames?
Relaxed or on edge?
Listen or disregard?
Pride or concern?
Public or private?
Adventure or reward?
Save my life or leave me here?

Found this in my music binder. Wrote it 2 years ago... man some of this stuff is really nostalgic.
Delta Swingline
Delta Swingline
19 hours ago

This state of limbo is the calmest and scariest place to be.
Where all of these decisions seem to matter long before they've been made.
And here I am just staring down the possibilities...

I can stop you know.
I have self control and that is something I can be sure of.
But even now, what are we supposed to do?

I'll start with saying this:

I'm not going anywhere.
I am not a guarantee for what you might want, but I won't leave.
I can't.

So here's what I propose:

Stop. Think. Act.

And sure, that's brutal honesty, and it's not easy.
But you've got an iron will do you not?

For now...
Just watch some TV with me.


Whatever happens, I'll be sure to be here. You know that.
20 hours ago

Beneath this stone there is a heart, it does not beat when we're apart, it does not move, to you I'd prove, my heart remove, its yours to take, but for my sake, to dull this ache, to fill this space that i did make, exchange me yours, there is no clause, there is no test, in me invest, you're heart bequest, our souls coalesce, our love confessed,

                      Forever blessed.

christiaan barnard was the first person to successfully perform the first human to human heart transplant on December 3rd 1967
#demon   #me   #complete   #christiaan   #barnard  
Danielle L Cook
Danielle L Cook
22 hours ago

I think I need a therapist
someone with experience
I feel like an experiment

how can I know if something is the right thing, when I've tried nothing else? when does someone know they're on the right path? are these questions my answers? am I running in circles?
#poetry   #life   #me   #experiment   #therapist  
Ben Jr
Ben Jr
1 day ago

If there is to be an end,
Let there be a rose in my hand,
A kiss upon my lips,
And silent moment before I break,

If there is to be an end,
Let it be quick,
No words to be said,
So I'd have the best memory of you for me,

If there is to be an end,
I want it to be like this,
A day, out in the world,
The wind upon my face,
Tell me all I need to know,
And leave me to my peace,

#love   #silent   #you   #me   #breakup   #rose   #moment   #darling  
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