some days I miss my layups
people break my ankles
some times I miss my cuts
and lose all of my respect
Most days I'm kind of trash
so go ahead and laugh
you should do it while you can
I'm about to come back
I will train my best
until theres pain in my chest
fight for that ball
until the very end.
And in my wake
quietly I will wait
to shoot in your face
in front of all your friends.
so watch out for you shall see
theres nobody better than me
for i am the queen of the court.
and winning is my game.
To which demons it may concern;
You know me. I'm your worst enemy.
I'm the sunshine that breaks your attempts at drowning her.
I'm the flower petals that infiltrate the scent of your rot.
You wish me gone.
But understand in turn that is what I wish of you.
You have no right to push her over any cliffs of your choosing.
You have no right to make her feel as worthless as she does.
You have no right to play upon her heartstrings like an overplayed violin.
And if you ever lay a single claw mark upon her skin again, you'll wish you were back in hell.
Because that's way nicer than where I'm gonna send you.
Wondering if it's selfish of me to hope for relief?
I keep thinking today is the day
I'll end this grief--
yet each new day brings something new
and now we have more fears to look into
a suspicious spot taking root on my love's right lung
and this after having chemo and the bell had been rung!
We were supposed to be getting the words, "you're all free and clear!"
Instead we're looking at scans in disbelief as we hear,
"It might be a new cancer, but most likely it's not--
it's that same damn colon cancer" -- trying to rob and rot
and steal the healthy tissues inside of my true love
and I want to shout and rant and rage to all above
and wonder why, oh why must we now face this????
Am I not allowed even a few moments of bliss???
We've been talking of marriage, but waiting to hear
that my true love was finally free and clear--
but now we're back into yet another fight
and don't misunderstand, I'll go after this cancer
with all of my might
and he will too---I promise you that right now
and let me say this, (my solemn vow):
We're going to win, damn you cancer all to hell
and once again, we're going to ring that huge chemo bell!
We'll walk away intact and rejoicing in our love
and you angels and gods up above?
Just get ready to see what determination, love and dedication can do
and know that my true love and I will most assuredly make it through!!!
©Pamela Rae 03.23.2017
Please send positive vibes for Round 2 of this fight...
(thank you from my heart) ♥
Hope is a sparrow on the deck ledge,
Praying her chicks will fly off the edge.
Hope is an old cat in an animal rescue,
Longing for a compassionate person like you.
Hope is a child wishing for some friends,
Once the game of freeze tag ends.
Hope is a poor man on the street
With a desire to hear a song so upbeat.
Hope is what most people want and gain,
Even through trial and storm and rain.
Dig your grave
You wanted to dig
It's too steep
Your in too deep
No room to stumble
You gotta climb them walls
If it cost nails
You have to dig those fingers
Into the blood lubricated crevices
Found in the gritty walls edges
Should there be a rope at this point
Your ground up nubs could no longer grasp it
As you wallow in the self pity
Wishes of swords swallow
You refuse mercys beggard exist
Pain encouraged weakness leaves
Body and conscious hope
One last effort for the wall groped