My feelings are yours to play with,
my friends are yours to take,
my dreams are yours to turn to nightmares
and my words are yours to fake.
There's no reason for it, it's just all yours.
You're entitled to it all
Break me, hate me, manipulate me
and bring out every flaw.
You're not my brother, I won't let you in
I'm so much stronger now
I won't let you have this power,
Watch me make myself proud.
But I know you'll consume me again with guilt
and soon I'll drown with concern
that your disease is taking over
and all you've done to me was deserved.
All she could do was laugh as she slipped into the tub,
her make up long smudged and her hair undone.
The water filled up along with iridescent bubbles cornering the rim.
All she could do was laugh as the searing hot water rushed onto her,
but she was beyond the point of caring.
But the laugh was not happy you see,
it was filled with pain.
All she could do was laugh as she touched the faint white scars on her body mumbling,
'my skin is much too clean'
All she could do was laugh as her slim fingers fiddled with the knife,
and she slowly brought it to her fair skin.
And she laughed and laughed until the water went dry and her body was almost as red as the blood starting to circle the drain.
But she could care less.
For that laughter was merely a cry of help,
to save her from circling the drain.
So take me out
I don't care to abuse
My heart this way
There was plenty time to have used
So make your excuse
As I make my way
May hands stand accused
And I'm sorry
Time will make things right
Make things lost
To bring my world down
So take me out
I don't care anymore
I just need to ignore
I need to find myself through the waves
And be okay
Time will make things right
Make thing lost
My world down
I guess he loved the face
crinkling her nose,
as if she could ever look silly
I guess he loved the smile
when she caught him staring,
she always caught his eye
I guess he loved the excitement
she brought with her
everywhere they went,
always shining from her
I guess he loved the way
to hold his hand,
it always got him laughing
I guess he loved her too much,
because time was not enough,
and stole what they had
I guess he forget the tears
she easily cried
over simple things,
too fragile and weak
I guess he forget the nightmares
every night without his comfort,
always longing for his embrace
I guess he forget the mask
everyday of her life,
the only person to see her without it
I guess he forget he loved her,
because time was not the problem,
and what they had just
We like to think we are hard to understand
Intricate mazes with twisting chaotic paths
Leading to numerous outcomes
Mysteries woven within our stories
Constantly changing and always anew
We like to believe we are elaborate structures
Constructs of pure ingenuity
Winding corridors with infinite knowledge
With mysterious doors holding plethoras of secrets
Darkened halls to shroud our true motives
Stairways up and down, leading anywhere and everywhere
We like to fool the world
Building these zig-zagging stories
Losing the truth the farther we burrow
Forgetting who we are in the labyrinths of our minds
Forever lost in what we have become
We lied to ourselves
With broken confidence, striving to be who we want
Rather than who we are
Living in a world of other grande designs
Trying to keep up against time itself
We doubted ourselves
Unable to look at the mirrors which spoke the most truth
Turning away and hiding in the lies we fortified around us
The barricaded conscience, locked away and ignored
Emotion took hold and there you sat
We all sat and wondered
Where would "I" fit in this broken world
Of towering deceptive motives
Glimmering pedestals of deceit
Trick rooms and evil men
We all asked ourselves "Where will I go"
When people see the place I've hidden myself away
Calling us out, asking to venture, deep through our halls
We felt simple opposed to the world
Far greater stories, fascinating, colorful
And our structures crumbled
And there we sat
Alone, where the world could see what we ignored in that mirror
But we understood
That Truth can set you free
Despite the lies we make ourselves believe
For simplicity is truth itself
Hope is dangerous
Perhaps that's why it hangs around on street corners
And in doorways
Waiting to waylay me as I pass through
To get my morning coffee
I've been fighting with Hope
But it doesn't fight fair
It has a shiv that cuts deeply into my heart
And the parry fractures on my ulnae
Say more about its victory over my defenses
Than these inadequate words ever can.
Hope has a rap sheet a mile long
And when it comes knocking,
Part of me knows it would probably be better
To turn out the lights and pretend I'm not home
But I'm recklessly unafraid.
And the danger excites me.
And I climb on the back of Hope's motorcycle
Not caring that he's taking the curves too fast
And I let hope sneak me out of the house in the middle of the night
Running away together into the night
Knowing full well that when the morning comes,
He will be long gone.
Hope has me sitting in this car in an abandoned shipyard
Waiting for the drop
Believing, against all sanity, that you will show up
To make the exchange
To continue the deal.
Hope is reckless and fearless
Hope is the explanation behind every one of these scars
I haven't seen you in a long time, but
Foolishly, I still believe in your promise
And soon, the court date with Hope will come
And my love for you will stand trial
Though it's never been anything but innocent,
I know I would be found guilty, time and again
Hope blasphemously sits in the judges chair
Feet up on the railing
As he waits for you to show up and swear in.
Hope brokers back-door deals with me in the passenger seat
Leads me down dark alleys at 2 in the morning
Making promises nobody could ever keep
He keeps my bank account at an all-time low
He holds the gun to my ribcage in the tattoo parlor and asks, one more time
"Will this save you? Will this make you free?"
Hope is an exercise in flirtation with disaster
Except that Hope doesn't know how to flirt,
Doesn't do anything halfway -
It becomes an exercise in falling in love with disaster
Finding beauty in the broken things.
I'm begging you -
I know Hope is dangerous
But please don't tear him away from me
Dear god, please.
Because if you leave this time
If you fail me now
If you walk away, he walks with you.
Despair becomes my only company
And though dangerous, Hope is exciting
Despair just hands me the bottle of tequila
And shaking his head knowingly, tells me
To drink until it's empty
To say goodbye to you and Hope
The only way I can