We're living in a world like the matrix. All we can do is try to make sense of one another's actions and be patient. Reality truly is only what you make it to be. Everything you see is energy, neither created, or destroyed. When we deployed our troops overseas did we ever see the underlying reason. Too many of us are more concerned with the shifting of seasons (The news.) Sometimes I believe it's the eye in the pyramid, then I remember that evil is what you make it, that's why I became a Mason. Its ironic that Saddam was going to sell the oil for Euros. Then Bush came into power and the federal bureau blew up the towers only hours later, we as a nation received confirmation that Iraq was our target for invasion. But how can we blame them as we fuel our cars with the blood soaked tar sands from this foreign land that none of us care to know. Why should we show compassion for fallen soldiers that gave their lives so we would have automobiles that drive. It seems that our demise was prophesied way back in biblical times. I don't find it likely that we'll open our eyes to the lies fed to us from birth. This is my home, this is planet, Earth.
Like the fog that rolls in,
blanketing the coast.
My doubts surround me,
a ever present ghost.
Confidence is a mask
I only take off at night.
Longing for some hope,
a little presence of light.
Acting like I am strong,
when I feel oh so weak.
A loving, helping hand,
is all I really seek.
Someone to share
and understand my soul.
Together made stronger,
Complete and whole.
Would that these sounds inside my head stop, for the briefest of moments,
for if it was so that I could just hear your voice one more time,
I would listen like a child in incumbent solitude,
as if to a mothers soothing voice,
as she reads never ending stories,
and if time would hold back these autumn tears,
I would breath again, feeling the cold, crisp air enter my lungs as a soothing balm,
healing my wounds and making me whole.
The sun shines brightly in the sky
But I see it not, nor do I feel its warmth.
I try to see my future; I fail
All I see is gloom and darkness,
Like my world has just been destroyed
This pain I shall never forget,
Nor the joy I had before
I have to find a way to heal,
Or the wound will become sore
Right now I feel depressed,
And in my head I'm all messed.
Love can be painful, as I know now.
Just a day ago, I was blissful
But in the last few hours,
I experienced more pain than I ever did before
My world right now is kind of like this:
Dark, lonely, depressing
And devoid of any bliss.
persisting mists keep paralysis
locked upon these lips
priority checklists insist
there is much more to live for than this
but a pack of 20 is gone long before
the night arrives
to heighten my hollow feining core
eagerly willing to endure more
if it brings an end to the internal war
then moved onto 100's
it's the percentage of how certain i am
that all corruption
is never ending
these invented coping methods
-lists of pros and cons with cigarettes-
are not getting me any closer
the mending process
of which i wish i was commencing
i bet instead
i'll keep pretending
that this demise is intended for me
still I know i'm only guessing
and growing further away from
the social structure
that has been made,
but made to rupture
missing you comes in breezes
memories reside in the back of my mind
not daring to come start replaying
because they know my fragile heart
is not ready to see what we were
what we've become
missing you comes in hail storms