Memories
t w i r l i n g
w r a p p i n g
around my
i n s a n i t y
Why did you have to leave me
Why couldn't you give this a try
Why do I still care, cause I certainly shouldn't
After all you have done
After all the tears Ive cryed
Why do I still love you, the one person in this world that continues to hurt me, starve me, abuse me, use me
Just give me a reason
A glimmer of hope
But the question lies in the answer
and my thoughts continue to lie in the word
Why
After
Every
Little thing we ever were
Should I still love you.
My heart just sank,
Straight from my chest to my stomach.
What the fuck did I just do?
Did I really just send that?
He's probably sleep at this time of night.
He probably won't reply until tomorrow,
I mean, if he wants to reply.
What if he doesn't?
There's so many reasons why I shouldn't have done that.
But,
There also do many reasons why I should have.
Ok Kim,
Just calm down.
It's not like you put your heart on the line,
You're fine.
I feel lost on this earth,
people tease me,
people accuse me,
half of the time i don't here about these things,
I'm unwanted,
I'm disgusting,
I'm weird,
I'm insane,
Why can't I be normal?
Like the girls who everyone likes,
someone who people wouldn't make fun of,
I'm ashamed of myself,
and I wish to be gone.
At the first rumble of the thunder
You threw me to the grass
Kissing me deeply,
You knew you did not even have to ask
At the second dribble of rain
Your strong hands ripped my shirt
Stroking me softly,
I clawed at the cold, hydrated dirt
At the third strike of bright lightning
You smiled at my body
Thanking me sweetly,
Our bareness was anything but gaudy
Let me tell you about a place
where adults can come to play
It's an adult Disneyland of sorts
and there's no end to the day.
The fields are lined with vendors
providing meditation spots for free
I even found a tied died Jesus
twice in one day to save me.
I slid on rainbow water slides
rode a multicolored ferris wheel
I surveyed miles and miles of wonder
flying high on a pink seat of steel.
There's a strong sense of community
that serves one communal mean
to convey one's self expression
though art and sustaining green.
Sandalwood swirls through the air
and joins music's pleasing taste
That fuels the hungry thousands
to dance in an ecstasy filled haze.
Camps proudly fly their country's flag
and speak one universal truth
That art and music hold the key
to
life's
fountain
flow
of
youth.
Sad road trip home........
See you in '14
Pain holds my hand and won't let go,
I blister at his touch, walk weeping
by his side and wake to his embrace.
Pain holds my hand.
Pain holds my hand and won't let go,
I weep beside the river, step into its waters
begging for relief, Pain looks on, he
holds my hand.
From blisters ooze our blood and plasma,
down our hands, onto our feet. Pain says
to me: Do you wish now to escape? I know
not what to say. Mute, I hold his hand.
Pain holds my hand, he never lets me go.
I writhe and weep and finally look
into his bloodshot eyes; for he is weeping too,
Pain holds my hand, he weeps for me.
We walk three days through deserts dry,
Pain holds my hand. From my blood he draws
the poisons of my sins. Pain holds my hand,
he weeps for me.
I know that this is wrong, our bodies intertwined so;
But when my leg touches your leg,
And your leg touches my leg,
Even the sharpest strike of lightning could in no way
Ignite the fire that the friction of our skin creates.
Why must there be only twelve numbers on the clock?
For our time of now has been cut short, snipped by
The scissors of Fate, and only one thread remains to determine
If we shall ever meet again.
The tousled blanket and the pillow falling off the bed
Are the only remaining evidence of our existence;
Yet when I make the bed at dawn,
I will flatten the sheets,
I will straighten the pillows,
and I will bid you goodbye.
And as I sit here alone, the door locked until time persists,
I remember the volcanic essence of our nights together -
The way your touch sends shivers down my spine -
And the whiteness of your eyes coming at me from the darkness of your face.
Now that we have parted and the holy aura from our bodies gone,
My brain can only feel the chemicals left by your aroma.
Nothing remains but the memory of scorching breaths and sticky arms
As well as the feeling of your smooth bicep lying across my bare chest -
The story of two star-crossed lovers with a finale seemingly as tragic.
