As I call upon the night
To have a conversation
Darkness gives way
And night comes alive
Conscious mind at rest
Sub-conscious takes over
Memory box is brimming
So many anecdotes
Not afraid to emerge
Confident around the dark
Shying away from the day
Night has a life of its own
Feeling antsy and inundated
Quivering hands open the box
Full of pictures in sepia
A retrospective of events
Which were long buried
Sleep has abandoned me
Old memories keep me awake
since you looked
clenching your phone
as your knuckles fade
into the brightest of whites
& water droplets consume
your bottom lashes
71 days since
you told me
she wasn't going
to make it
since we sat in my car
tears crawling down your
outside of that place
they call hospice
& we call hell
since you called me from
school and begged that
i pick you up
so i did
and we drove
we drove aimlessly until
we found a diner to
a diner that held no
no memory of that
sweet woman you knew
you were about to
since you told me
"i want her to let go now"
"she needs to be free"
since you said your
you told her you loved her
and all she could
was a tender
squeeze of the hand
since your father fell
holding her cold hand
and within that
one hundred and eighty seconds
she slipped into her
dressed in white, i'm sure
leaving behind this
since my mother
watched a shadowed
figure leave &
my little brother's room
at four a.m.
as he slept
it was her, i'm sure
since i stood next
looking down at
a body no longer
draped in pink
holding your hand
all i could say
was i'm sorry
as i held your
soothing your rapid
swollen eyes that you
be held by her again
instead of me
dance with her in the sky
newest & most beautiful angels
beth ann bradbury
Here, passing lonely down this quiet lane,
Before a mud-splashed window long I pause
To gaze and gaze, while through my active brain
Still thoughts are stirred to wakefulness; because
Long, long ago in a dim unknown land,
A massive forest-tree, ax-felled, adze-hewn,
Was deftly done by cunning mortal hand
Into a symbol of the tender moon.
Why does it thrill more than the handsome boat
That bore me o'er the wild Atlantic ways,
And fill me with rare sense of things remote
From this harsh land of fretful nights and days?
I cannot answer but, whate'er it be,
An old wine has intoxicated me.
Tell me to smile, and you'll be blinded by an uncontrollably wobbling gorge showing teeth.
Tell me to draw, and you'll wonder if it's a tornado or my impression of three-year-olds.
Tell me to walk, and you'll be offended by my petty, measly stumbling.
Tell me to swim, and you'll find yourself saving my life.
Tell me to achieve, and you'll only make up for my failure.
Tell me to think, and you'll lose interest in my pondering of the already proven.
If what I have seen is what I have written,
Then the most beauteous blues of the seraphic sea are what encompass me.
And though my eyes green, not blue,
you can still see the waves that ebb and flow in my eyes,
into the doors of my soul.
If what I have felt is what I have written,
Then the blood that pulsates in my veins flows fiercely, awakening me from within.
And, although the heart that beats is tattered and worn,
light flows through the doors of my soul like heaven's glimmering luminosity.
If the words I have spoken are the words I have written,
Then I desire to ignite the fire of she, whom I admire,
with words honey soaked, and a love better lived with than revoked.
If there a time where I tell a story of a heart once broken in the words I have written,
Then I hope to prove to she, who loves me as I do her, that a soul once fragile, beaten down by deceit, and love found to be treacherous, still fights on currents flowing, filled with love like the waters beauteous and still shines like heaven's glimmering luminosity.
These two doors with love flowing and light shining through remain unlocked and unguarded, waiting for she who knocks on the doors of my soul with an open heart treasuring my warmth in a loving embrace.
I met a guy not that long when we said hi.
We talked and laughed and shared wonderful moments behind.
We're on the phone all night and sent sweet messages most times.
He told me I'm beautiful and said he loves me. I don't know why.
I'm happy and terrified at the same time.
He's not even mine and I love you?
We just met, I'm just scared alright.
Just three but powerful words can't you see it's not that easy to define?
Saying I love you, it takes time.
Get to know me and we'll see what truly is life.
'Coz it seems you're just playing with my mind. I know it's not just me who you trying to be nice.
Quit the game and be real this time.
I want you to find a girl who you'll truly love at the end of time.