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Rosie 1h
At fifteen, the reaper came, silent in the night,
Stealing me from youth's warm, calming delight.
****** into a world where heartbreak resides,
Where innocence withers and hope slowly dies.

No more laughter, just echoes of pain,
Sorrow's lament, a relentless refrain.
Gone are the dreams that once danced in our sight,
Replaced by storm clouds, obscuring the light.

Now, I linger by your grave,
With flowers wilted, their colors all grey.
I mourn the loss of innocence, the childhood's decay,
In the quiet, I kneel, with so much left to say.

Grief marks the end of youth, a bitter pill to swallow,
and builds a home for loneliness to wallow.
It's been almost ten years now, and I still can't move on from losing you.
Show me the drought,
I'll turn it into rain.

Show me the world,
I'll tame its fear, its pain.

Tell me a lie,
I'll turn it into truth.

Give me your death,
I'll give my life to you.
Here it is once more
- a dark form looming -
A shadow from Before,
A storm's mark, dooming.
.
Invisible vise grip,
the weight on my chest;
Marble-heavy crypt,
A thornbird's nest.
.
This hunter is slow,
patient, though relentless;
with no arrow, or bow,
or trigger to press.
.
His footsteps fall monotone
- finality's beat -
Like soot on a wall of bone,
the last defeat.
.
Although he'll stay
out of sight, a dark drape,
Know that his prey
might never escape.
.
When no one's around,
When comforts are few,
In the scent of moist ground,
He could find you too.
.
04.03.2024.
(Halloween is only 241 days away, lol)
step to the threshold
love is pulled away with the door
       into the ice night
replaced with mewling horror
exposure   invites my death
..tanka style

Original Version -

threshold
step
     into the night
and love is pulled away with the door
replaced
       with a mewling wall of horror
step out and meet winter
  exposure    invites my death
                                with a snarl
Everyday I walk in the rain
The rain of tears from endless pain
Hiding the pain behind a smile
Not seen the sun in a while
Morning brings the rain again
Only the storm is hidden within
No cuts or bruises to show as symptoms
Everyday the internal pain beats like a drum
The only symptom is not wanting to live
From hidden pain no one can see to believe
I was a dead body, decaying in decades of wreckage, buried in my tarnished land. Shape shifting into a muse that acquires its sunday best to stand tall, relentlessly.

And yet life is much wiser than to all of my whims, molding my heart as a vessel of my misadventures, and veins that bears my broken dreams. I still dance on a hard wood floor, memorizing the creaks on it; memorizing the fear of falling.

My skin and bone grows in unfamiliar love, shaped into a misery, it is morphed on my own garden of heaven and abyss, relinquished its life in romanticism and death.
When I see a man
sitting in the corner of the street,
I say: Wake up! I know you can!
Don't waste your life on an unimportant things.
In the end, they will let you down.
Wake up, please!

And he looks at me in disbelieve.

When I see the youngsters
smoking **** in the park,
I say: It's time to wake up! It's the highest time!
Don't waste your life on an unimportant things.
In the end, they will let you down.

And they look at me like 'what the f*ck'.
dead friends on the mantelpiece
to scripture over our lives
salivate and dictate from the sidelines
        - as i grow a family -
they become hidden behind a build up
                            of favourite greeting cards
                  too pretty to let go of
I am counting my blessings,
one, two, three, four,
five...

I will not live forever,
though I will never  
die.
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