I vaguely remember our car rides together
I wished they'd last forever
We drove around singing Queen
Imagine what could have been?
I'm nearly eighteen,
I'm beginning to forget

I vaguely remember us at Disney
I cling on to the memory fragments
Reenactments of my mind
I wish our lives where redesigned

I've been told you rocked me to sleep
Where are you now when I'm trying to fall asleep?
I vaguely remember your bad jokes
When I awake you're still not here

I imagine our little conversations today
We could play or sway or you could help me with an essay
Possibilities which will never be
Because you did not stay

It dawned upon me, I have spent most of my life away from you
That makes me feel so blue
I wish we could start anew
For I so desperately miss you

I am not just my fathers daughter
Please can we slaughter
This idea that we belong to others
I am not another's

I am not just my mothers daughter
Please can we alter
This idea that we are not whole
I am not a doll you can control

I am not just someone's girlfriend
This view must end

Why do I have to defend this dead-end?
I recommend you look again
My fire has awoken, yet
You lit your cigarette
Has my individuality become a threat?
Please do not forget
I am not just a silhouette

                                           I am **someone

Women should accommodate for men
Watch life through their lens
Follow the latest a trends
But most of all accommodate for your boyfriends

On men's magazines you see a body builder
A pillar, a vacuum, ******* in space
Toned and cloned
But women must have grace
On a women's magazine you see weight loss
Clearly we cannot be the boss
Go apply your lipgloss

My advice is reclaim your thrones and space
Apply your war paint
**** restraint
Do not let them encase you
In a glossy magazine
Do not let them erase your face
Climb up this staircase
Pick up your mace
Smash the glass ceiling

Do not accommodate for their feelings
Make them beg your forgiveness kneeling

Women should accommodate for their ego
Like a snake it wounds around your body
Tightening and restricting
Constricting your opinion
To give way for their dominion

**** them
**** all who stand in your way
Make them pay
For the way they made you purvey and obey
This is a new day
Today women should accommodate for the their own ******* selves
Not placed on bookshelves

I'm afraid

I'm afraid of being betrayed
By those who I love
So I stand in the shade
I dream of
Better days, unafraid,
Of being dismayed

I'm afraid of being alone
The grey unknown
Has been shown
The darkness is now my throne
My isolation is my crown
It rests upon my brow
I've become a clown

I'm afraid of my self
I sit alone on a shelf
Collecting dust
I want to combust
Who do I even trust?

My fears have moulded to my skin
Each inhale
Can cause me to derail

                                  My tale has made me pale
                                  For my fears are like a veil
                                    I have made my own jail

Drifting away from the stars

I watch my decisions sway 

Look at all this decay
I cannot make my mind

Drifting away from the suns

I am confined and resigned 

My fate is designed

When the stars aligned

I am just so blind
Drifting behind


I want to be reassigned from mankind 

Maybe one day I’ll find my mind 

Maybe it will be refined, defined
But today I’m drifting 

Shifting in this world 

A peal in an underworld

Drifting away from the cosmos

Maybe one day it will be clear

But right now it’s foggy and dark 

I just want to disembark

I may be quitting but right now I’m just

drifting

You ask me why do I cry
I cannot lie
my heart is shattered into two
You ask me why am I so blue
I'll tell you why my dear
I'm all out of tears from the years I spent crying over you

I value my life as much as you valued mine
If I die tomorrow my dear would you miss me
I sighed and cried, yet I didn't not see you

This strong willow tree is nothing but a shrub
This strong wolf is nothing but a pup
This rainbow has no luck
That swan is nothing but a duck
This strong woman is nothing but a fragile girl

You ask me why do I cry
I cannot lie
my heart is shattered into constellations
because of your creations
across the sky they lie
watch the pieces shine
but it is all lies
they're all dead inside

I look at myself and all I see is grey
I try so hard to pray it away
I know it's cliche
But I can't stand my own face

It's sad eyes
They see through my lies
My oversized thighs
My failure to revise
I despite this disguise

I look at myself and all I see is disappointment
Try harder I mumbled in exhaustion
What a collision
My own derision

One day, soon, I will look at myself and all I will see is joy
My reflection, I will enjoy not want to destroy
I will not be coy
As the sun dawns
All will be gone I vowed

I look at myself today and all I see is hope
For I am proud
I want to scream it loud in crowd
I am proud of me and you
And with that statement I feel so new.

I try hard to pray
I'm waiting for you to say or at least display
that you are here
I volunteer and adhere to all they say I should every year
Even when others sneer
It's all unclear
But I'm beginning to loose my faith

I don't attend church
Just trying to search
In a holy building I won't find you
But the truth is overdue
It must be untrue
For everywhere I pursue
Leaves me blue
I'm just asking for a clue
Because I'm beginning to loose my faith

Some say you're in the air
I stare in despair
Beware of the lies
Some say you're in the sky's
Maybe it's just a guise?
A disguise which denies me my eyes
I was baptised
Does that mean I get to share your Celestial City?
What a pity
You see I'm beginning to loose my faith

Just come down and denounce your scripture
It's all just a contemporary mixture
I can't see the picture
Maybe you're in my mind
Created by an unkind humankind

I am suddenly no longer inclined,
I am suddenly no longer blind
Never mind

I have not lost my faith, I never had it
It was never innate, I must admit
There are no big pearly gates
Just our small debates

For I have truly lost my faith.

Your good deeds are clearly seen
For you put them on our screens
By all means cause a scene
Your image is clean
Yet you're in between your mirror and your facade
The person in the mirror is a fraud

You've clawed your way up the ladder
Fooling everyone with your laughter
I beg of you shatter this sadder facade
Before it morphs your own reflection
Avoid perfection
Show me some affection

This person in the mirror is a reflection
Of your mask of deception  
Adjust your skin
It's become your twin  
It has caused wars
Not outdoors but inside the walls of your mind
You're so blind
Can you even find the person in the mirror

The explosions have shattered the mirror
Your soul is battered
Please remove the mask from you face
So you can find your place
Erase the disgrace you've become
The daily injection of lies has made you numb
Yet your reflection does not look glum
The mask so softly embedded in your face
I can't find a trace of the person in the mirror

The mirror is now a shadow of who you used to be
You ignored my plea
No longer free, an absentee from your life
What a strife

Endeavour to stay true to life
And you won't have to pay the ultimate price
And the person in the mirror won't be covered in ice
So heed my advice