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252 · Feb 2019
Blink
Sketcher Feb 2019
How do you know who cares and who doesn't,
Who's your aquantince and who's your friend,
A friend will always choose to show their love,
Making you feel happy a common trend.
They will give advice that you need to hear,
Whether you like what they say or not,
They will give you a shoulder to cry on,
They should be making you laugh alot.
Does their presence make you burst with joy,
Or simply make you wish life to go on,
They should give you comfort from dawn to dusk,
And make you feel welcome from dusk to dawn.
Sometimes there's rough times that lead to dismay,
This could possibly lead to a fallout,
With fake friends that you thought would always stay,
True friends will always stay without a doubt.
If they do care, then how much and how deep,
Both your carings should grow and amass,
Does their caring show in dreams during sleep,
Does their caring show from future to past.
Can you look back on times when they were there,
Look forward and know that they will be,
Reminisce in memories you share,
Share secrets to whatever degree.
Trust in them to the fullest extent,
And long for their elating presence,
Hear what they say and understand what they meant,
Show compassion in indubious pleasance.
Would they cry and feel pain if you died,
Would they go through the ultimate strife,
Would their agony fill to the ceiling,
Would they eventually take their own life.
Never take a true friend for granted,
They are more rare than you would ever think,
Be there and care for the ones you love,
For you could loose them within a blink.
There they go.
252 · Dec 2018
Friend + Lover
Sketcher Dec 2018
A friend will want you to rid of their loneliness,
A lover will always want to remove that loneliness,
That is why I,
The lover,
Continues to stick with her,
The friend.
Friend + Friend ✔
Lover + Lover ✔
Friend + Lover ✘
248 · Apr 2019
Day 6
Sketcher Apr 2019
Inperceivable problems of the past,
Countless current conversions,
Manifold future interferences,
And then there’s you...

Complications, dilemmas, disputes,
Contradictions, counters, and refutes,
Authenticity diminishes and dilutes,
The truth, the principle, and it’s proof,
And then there’s you...

Complicated comments and concepts,
Simply a disturbance, a diversion,
From my feeble-minded intellect,
But now I am thinking,
What good comes of the smarts in a man,
If I am on one side, I look towards the other,
And then there’s you...
Separate from me...
Separate from my problems...
I take no action...
I say I don’t need help...
I turn away...
I look back once more...
Your hand is on my shoulder...
And you remind me...
We are in this together...
Forever and Always...
Separate from my problems, yet able solve them with ease. The problems are only difficult in the mind of the subject. Luckily, at such an early age, I found my soulmate. Forever and Always...
Sketcher Jan 2019
I'm constantly worrying that she might go off a scurrying to maybe light a **** with a boy at the dead of night I want it to stop but she has her rights.

She even said that she wants it to stop every ******* date ends up in a flop and heartache is the only thing she cops off the top off all celebrity props.

I want to end this and listen to music, I'm not feeling this, but she's feeling his ****, I'm laying here in bed feeling even more sick, after 50 pills gave my heart a jump kick. Jump start, jump back, pulled apart, from the crack, torn in half, called it all, from the start, I've been mauled, been attacked, filled my cart, with a stack, of true love, so my heart, will rise above, your petty ****, fill this pit, with my grit, but your fake skit, completely outweighs it.

It makes sense on a stupid level, when your brains made of ******* metal, spilling tea out the mouth like a kettle, moving down south so you can meddle, with the floor, and maybe pour, the last bit of essence out of your core, standing back up is to much of a chore, I'm done with this **** so walk out the ******* door.
Wut?
241 · Nov 2018
Invisible
Sketcher Nov 2018
I wish I was invisible,
I could easily hide away,
This has to be a miracle,
A wish that will come true someday.

Sure, there are people that want to see me,
But they are just few less than a dozen,
I wish I could remove the debris cause,
The one who I want to see me, doesn’t.

She used to see me quite clearly,
Back when I think and hope she cared,
Back when there was intimacy,
When I held her when she was scared.

I will cover up with fake emotion,
Until I can finally realize,
That there are many fish in the ocean,
Fish that are venomous sharks I despise.
Even though there are more fish in the sea, most of them are toxic.
240 · Jan 2019
Skin Hunger
Sketcher Jan 2019
Skin.
Skin!
Not their's. Hers.
Only Hers!
Feeling: Very Good.
Serenity.
Pure.

Leaving.
Pulling Away.
Withdrawal.
Feeling:
Hurts.
Stop.
Feeling.
239 · Dec 2018
Knowledge Vs. Wisdom
Sketcher Dec 2018
Can you hear me,
Through my words,
Can you learn from the bees,
That of the birds,
No?, then fly higher,
Yes?, then you're a liar,
One is common sense,
Not sense learned prior,
The other, you've lived,
You've danced in the fire,
Of experience and wisdom,
Not just knowledge anymore,
This, I would like you to acknowledge for,
It will serve you well someday,
When yet another test comes your way.
237 · Nov 2018
Emotions and Alliteration
Sketcher Nov 2018
Alliteration is commonly the key,
To all successful sounding poetry,
Successful sounds are strenuous to seize,
But I can ensnare the melody with ease,
Emotions are the essential element to extract,
From people probing unplumbed parts of perceptive apprehension,
Compassing county's that are charred, crumbled and cracked,
Living lives loaded with languishing litter and interminable tension.
236 · Nov 2018
Screw Love
Sketcher Nov 2018
I really love her, but she really loves him,
And he doesn't love her, but just likes her slim body that will do anything on his **** command,
But I love her for her, she's the fairest in the land,
She takes me to her home to become so intimate,
She reaches her limit but my love is limitless,
She labels me as son and asks me to call her mom,
Strange fetish or excuse to snuggle, either way brings me to ROM,
The
Realm
Of
Madness,
That's where I'm stuck right now,
Stuck in between her way of life and the Tao,
Remaining friends and never anything less,
Hopefully more than friends if I make progress,
But I am not the one getting touchy feely here,
Because I don't want to make her uncomfortable or fear me,
Because I might drop,
From my current spot,
And lose the trust I've earned,
The whole entire lot,
So I say ***** love,
***** life,
I don't want to die,
I just don't want to exist,
I can see through the mist,
Wrote down reasons to live,
It was a small list,
Why must my breathing persist...
235 · Nov 2018
I'm Not Gay
Sketcher Nov 2018
Sorry if this letter makes you feel gray,
I'm happy that I can make someone's day,
I'm not into the way you like to sway,
We can be brothers but bro, I'm not gay.
I have always been the one to obey,
Morales were developed by my padre,
Religion from Monday until Sunday,
Suddenly he became a divorcee,
Ever since then I've been asexual,
Hopefully my words are effectual,
I hope my response is consensual,
I hope that this poem was effectual.
I'm not asexual. I'm gray ace.
235 · Feb 2019
Viable Options
Sketcher Feb 2019
I love you. I can't stand by and watch you torturing yourself. It's like watching someone I love **** another person I love. The only viable options would be to stop them from killing eachother or separate from them entirely because there is no reason to just stand by and watch... or is there?
234 · May 2020
Listen
Sketcher May 2020
She texted me...
Told me she was scared,
Said that the world was against her,
And life was unfair,
I asked why...
And if she was okay,
She said, "No,
I've been wearing a fake smile all day,,
Today was supposed to be my day,
But my parents started arguing,
Mainly about forgetting certain gifts,
At the Bargain Bin."
It was all down hill from there,
But I let her finish,
She told me her troubles and I said,
"I'll be there in a minute",
It took me an hour,
To drive to her house,
It took a while to get there,
Although I took the fastest route,
When I pulled in,
I was afraid I was too late,
For she had a history,
Of negative mental states,
But I walked into her house,
And then walked into her room,
And acted as the man,
That could see her darkness loom,
I picked her up of her bed,
And then gave her a hug,
Then put her back down,
And tucked her in snug,
I sat at the edge of her bed,
And listened with a smile,
As she talked and talked and talked,
For a very long while,
As the night went on,
A certain tension rose,
She asked for one last hug,
But then she held me close,
For longer than intended,
She didn't let me leave,
So I had laid by her side,
And we both fell asleep.
232 · Nov 2018
Advance Through Life
Sketcher Nov 2018
People can try,
Then they can fail,
When people die,
They will turn pale,
The higher you climb,
The harder it hails,
Words fill my rhyme,
Wind fills my sails.
228 · Jul 2019
Please Don’t Leave
Sketcher Jul 2019
I try to block out the negative parts of you I don’t want to exist,
But the longer I exist with you the longer they persist,
And soon instead of saying, “I love you” and “I sincerely miss”,
I’ll only be in the relationship for the cuddles and the kiss.
I really hope it doesn’t come to this,
Just the thought removes my bliss,
And my sadness grows like my cyst,
On my ****, but please continue, I insist.
Continue the love that you give to me,
I’ll accept all parts of you regardless the fee,
You’re more than a snack, you’re my little treat,
You’re more than my world, you’re all I want to perceive.
You’re my universe, my everything, my all,
You’re the biggest part of my life, not standing tall,
Short and cute, you are, like your hair in the breeze,
I love you, please don’t leave me, you got me on my knees.

I beg of you,
Don’t leave,
For if you left,
I wouldn’t be myself,
I would flee,
Yet here I am,
In the same spot,
In the same lot,
With the same thoughts,
Knowing this would happen,
Sadly, I’ve been caught,
In loves powerful grasp,
Loves top-notch trap,
I don’t want to leave,
This prison cell,
Although I plead,
I will not yell,
For I want to be,
With you forever...
Please don’t leave.
Confused...
226 · May 2020
Stop It
Sketcher May 2020
It's apparent a parent would glare at their transparent impairments. A viral mimicry, a parrot, coughing into their coffin, barfing leads to causing unstopping hand washing. Watching the currently conceived serene scene to see if they been seen. Stop it.
224 · Feb 2019
So Simple
Sketcher Feb 2019
I think that I've addressed that I'm obsessed in forty-three other heartfelt messes. Poetry falling apart at its best is completely normal when I'm loading my cart with formal vests to find confidence in the turmoil. Tinfoil type superstition is envisioned when smoking burnt coil above ripe ****** cakes, that's what it takes when push comes to shove, **** this kush, **** this fake love. Spilling out of every teens pores, killing off through peen spores in teen ******, essence lost from the core with no reward, guessing cost is fourscore then you're out the door. ****, it's a chore living out the lore of a giver and a saint freezing in a river with fresh paint running down the face. River of life and black paint that blinds, giver of strife, it's whack, no matter what the time. Whether you're drunk out of your mind or ******* high, the paint is soon to dry over your eyes and you'll be living blind. Stick your face in the water, it's so ******* simple. Sure, it might be cold on your cracked skin wrinkles. The solution is always right in front of your face. You just got to look for it before it's too late.
Woke up at midnight and this happened.
222 · Nov 2018
Do You Mind
Sketcher Nov 2018
Oh, I was thinking about killing myself,
Do you mind,
And putting my feelings up on a shelf,
And your blind,
When it comes to literally anyone else,
Let's rewind,
Back to before my heart would regularly melt,
I was fine,
But what's different from what I feel and I felt,
It's bout' time,
I unlock my brain and see what's locked in the vault,
It's not my fault,
But I need to blame someone for this mental assault.

So I'm pulled to the broken,
Because the fixed are just fine,
When these words are spoken,
My mental health declines,
Now I think I'm approaching,
The end of the line.
Sketcher Oct 2018
Jack and Jill,
Wanted to ****,
Their father's other daughter,
She was brown,
And out of town,
So, they quickly planned her slaughter.

Just the thought,
Of her face brought,
My tears of hate to vapor,
Once she's dead,
I'll feel no dread,
I'll steal her will, that small paper.

I am Jack,
I will attack,
My dumb adopted sister,
In the night,
With my new knife,
Sure, I am considered bitter.

She walks in,
Penetrate skin,
With my sharp brandished weapon,
Blood pours out,
She doesn't shout,
Cause she's already in heaven.

Hid the body,
In the soggy,
Closet underneath the stairs,
People question,
My depression,
For my brown sister, no one cares.
Influenced by the popular nursery rhyme, "Jack and Jill".
220 · Nov 2018
Anacreontic Freestyle Rap
Sketcher Nov 2018
Oh, at last,
I'm passed it,
Those feelings,
I trashed it,
I'm leaving,
Won't last it,
She's squealing,
I smashed it,
I'm bleeding,
From blast hit,
That **** hurt,
But I'm not done,
I ate dirt,
That wasn't fun,
Psyche, I spurt,
Out a **** ton,
Then she squirt,
But I'm her son,
I'm no pervert,
Now I'm done...

But I'm back,
Talking random,
I'm not black,
Yet I'm candid,
When my smack,
Becomes platinum,
There's a stack,
For the ransom,
Chill with hoodlums,
Always get caught,
That just bout' sums,
Up what happens not,
Throw **** together,
See if it works,
If it doesn't,
Keep it in still,
Cause it makes a mark.
An very random Anacreontic freestyle.
219 · Nov 2018
Poetry Building Trespassing
Sketcher Nov 2018
I had one place where the world revolved around me,
A transparent building I named poetry,
Few people could actually see through the thick glass,
Aware of meaning, aware of reality,
The glass will slowly thin out as the days go on,
Leaking more emotions and thoughts that should be gone,
It's okay, I don't care, I tell myself, always,
You're a queen deserving happiness, I'm a ******* pawn,
That will step back and stop all outlets,
And build up and break down my regrets,
Until my fuse hits the wire,
It has already caught fire,
See, I'm an okay liar,
Also, I'm an okay bomb,
Ticking with a fuse and wires being cut,
And blowing on the fire like that is what,
Will make everything stop but accepting,
Fate is all I can do in this setting,
Sure, I know you're not dumb but I am,
Thinking you couldn't see through these *******,
Clear *** walls that are starting to disgust me,
All I ever wanted was your happiness, trust me.
219 · Jan 2019
Purpose
Sketcher Jan 2019
Treasure things before they go.

Treasure people before they go.

Although everything is meaningless, we must infuse these people and things with meaning.
215 · Dec 2018
Unconsciousness Spread
Sketcher Dec 2018
Bored out of my mind,
Keep checking the time,
Four minutes till' leave,
I always perceive,
Time slow near the end,
So I have to spend,
My time writing poems,
Until I walk home.

All of a sudden,
I could see the gun,
Pointed right towards me,
Then the clock struck three,
As the bell did yell,
I ran, tripped, and fell,
Bullets screamed, desks flipped,
Light beamed eyes, I slipped.

The man walked around me,
Floor littered with bodies,
I was knocked out, then woke,
No lying bodies spoke,
I tried hard to play dead,
But then he had said,
"No sleep, this isn't bed",
As the bullet of lead,
Plummeted into my head,
Unconsciousness indefinitely spread.

Yet now I was awake,
At my desk in a lake,
Of sweat and shaking fear,
To me, it would appear,
This was all a day dream,
Boy, that dream was extreme,
Very realistic,
And not idealistic,
In the least, then I saw,
My fat teacher withdraw,
A pistol from the wall,
What happened, did I fall,
Back into the nightmare?,
After thinking this thought,
I was shot and killed right then and there,
Right on the spot...
Raise the consciousness. Also, my 100th poem!!!
215 · Nov 2018
Insanity
Sketcher Nov 2018
I feel like I have been struck with insanity,
Not worrying about what should make me worry,
Worrying about crumbs that just spilled under my seat,
When my sister just dropped and stabbed a knife in her feet,
Heartbreak all on top of a migraine and this **** pain,
Won't become numb because my overactive mainframe,
Keeps running at the speed of light over sound,
And now other ******* people are inbound,
They won't stop yelling and bickering about useless topics,
They speak quicker and I'm trying to get lost in the tropics,
The solitude where I might be able to find peace,
Probably not cause fantasies remove the fixed ease,
That never seems to come to me,
Even rarely when I can flee,
Thoughts get mixed with a lack of glee,
Lost in em' till' I'm ******* lost at sea,
At the same time I'm 8 miles up a tree,
My brains files are scattered and blowing free,
I do not belong in this family,
Redneck dad and my mother, Cherokee,
I'm just an emo *****, I'm unsightly,
So, "Get The **** Out!", I say politey,
When I am thinking it in its worst possible form,
Stay in bed, move out, but **** hotels and dorms,
Even though that is the only **** I can afford,
Minus college cause no scholarship was ever scored,
These are some ways to find isolation,
Maybe a little mental vacation,
Even though it's in the same location,
That started my depressive sensations,
So I'll stumble in my sadness,
While I'm lost in my mind palace,
I am done chasing that dumb rabbit,
I'll leave that to people like Alice,
He keeps checking the clock and will grab it,
Till' it falls, cracked on the ground and stabbed in,
His toes and he starts bleeding,
Other memories fleeting,
Bad memories that are gone now,
Time hurt and healed the rabbit, wow,
I just got to wait some more,
And avoid anymore ******,
Snooping around tryna' get some,
This rap was dumb and I'm done.
I have a terrible migraine right now and I can barely think. But thankfully, time will heal.
212 · Nov 2018
Go Figure
Sketcher Nov 2018
I figured out why I have depression,
I figured this is what I should mention,
I get depressed when others feel down,
Whether they're yellow, white, red, or brown,
I feel as if I need to make them happy,
When I'm around them I start to feel sappy,
Even if they cover up with fake emotion,
I still show them my special kind of devotion,
There is only three things I should've said,
That come from everything I sweat and bled,
I love you,
212 · Jan 2019
Truth Only Please
Sketcher Jan 2019
I told her how I felt,
And how she made me hurt,
She had made my heart melt,
Back when she was a flirt.
And now it only aches,
Cause she's with other guys,
When I'm talking to her,
I think she's telling lies.
She'll post on her story,
Saying that she needs help,
I respond, I worry,
And then she just says, "Welp,",
"Not the guy I wanted",
"To respond to my cry",
The ***** had just flaunted,
And after that, she lied,
Cause what I said she said,
She only said in her mind,
What she actually said was,
"I really don't want to cry",
All over my friends,
And then she said goodbye,
I hate it when she tends,
To always ******* lie.
Please just tell me the truth,
When you don't want to see me,
That's all.
No more rhythm or rhyme.
Just the truth.
Finally told her how I felt about her and now I'm questioning if it was the right idea or not.
212 · Nov 2018
Inner Violence
Sketcher Nov 2018
I feel a mad rush of violence soar,
Throughout my veins and out my pores,
I feel things I know not what for,
A battle inside of myself to restore,
A stable mentality or else I'm done for,
My inner self is becoming a civil war,
This shall last forever no nevermore,
Bringing what's inside into the outdoor.
208 · May 2020
From Mouth To Eyes
Sketcher May 2020
Absolutely no hostility,
Perceived when she speaks,
Lovely letters spill down,
Into little sentence creeks,
The arch in her gaping smile,
Produces dimples in her cheeks,
Whenever anguish arrives,
Her elation is what I seek,
Her brightly glowing soul,
Reflects the shining sky,
Leaving depression tears,
Destroyed and vaporized,
So whenever I appear sad,
Know I'm just a guy,
That is crying ecstasy...
The result of her soft eyes.
208 · Feb 2019
Boredom
Sketcher Feb 2019
When I'm bored, I get depressed. No motivation, so the stress stockpiles in a mess like loose files or a test that I never studied for cause I'm way to busy thinking about a ***** and that one time we smoked a blunt. Now she's dizzy. Smoke some more. Feel her ****. That ****'s drippy. Kiss me twice. Falls out the door. Kinda tipsy. Never came back. Said she loves me, then she attacked. This isn't healthy. Hurt my heart and mentally pulled me apart piece by piece.
205 · Nov 2018
Waking Up
Sketcher Nov 2018
I hate to wake up to eight ton weights,
A chest plate pressed up against my face,
Eyes dart and heart race like you've been chased,
For days in a gaze that shows your amazed,
Deemed this was depression detaining me,
Deliberately dozing to escape memory,
But right off the bat it's a panic attack,
Maturity rewinds and minds all off track,
Rational depersonalization,
Constant nauseous dizzying rotation,
Locate lower lacerations that bled,
Flop to the floor and felicitations, you're dead.
An aubade about the struggle.
205 · Oct 2018
I Wait
Sketcher Oct 2018
You gave me a feeling that I can not replicate,
And I can't always see you so I just sit and wait,
As my emotions destroy me and my heart deflates,
Can't see you til we make plans or meet again by fate.
So I will do just that, I will play the waiting game,
Until I can see you and hold you and say your name,
Bad emotions will uprise when you're not in the frame,
Depression, despair, doubt, frustration, guilt, grief, and shame.
Can't wait until I see you again, I love you babe,
Young love is painful, but it's powerful and it's great,
I am all filled with sadness but your presence elates,
Love, it is a lovely, painful, unbearable weight.
Please promise me that you will never go away,
Until your dying breath when we're both old and gray,
Whether this thing we have is rare or it's cliche,
I hope you join me in life, this chaotic play.
204 · Nov 2018
Died During Arrest
Sketcher Nov 2018
You see them together,
You wish she had it better,
But he treats her like cold weather,
Tryna' avoid her altogether,
But she's so clingy,
Because that's the only man she wants,
But his feelings are mini,
And you hate his nonchalance,
You need her to understand,
That you would be a better man,
And that you're her biggest fan,
But then she began,
To see herself as ugly,
No attention from her boyfriend,
This **** ain't funny,
So you buy her a puppy,
But then you're unlucky,
Before you give it to her,
She takes her own life,
Sliced her vein with a knife,
In the night,
Feelings ignite,
And you feel like you might,
Scream and fight,
Her boyfriend but you're polite,
But at the same time you're dynamite,
The boyfriend is just wide eyed for a second,
When he hears the news but then he's beckoned,
Over to another girl then politeness concludes,
Your body goes numb,
Your brain gets dumb,
Eyes fade out everyone,
Except for the one,
Who has killed your precious,
You take something out of the crevice,
Of the jacket that you possess,
You take out a knife time to transgress,
You stab it into his stupid flesh,
That let her die and you continue to press,
For some reason you still don't feel success,
You still feel the anger followed by stress,
You pass out and wake up to a red light,
Then it's blue and your blinded cause its so bright,
Covered in blood boy that's a sight,
To the police they though you died,
Now you want to you even tried,
To **** yourself cause there's no reason to live,
Your girl is dead and you just killed a kid,
The police stop you before you have a chance,
Man you wouldn't believe the circumstance,
Out of your blurry vision,
You see her standing there with him,
The man you just stabbed,
On a table all wrapped,
Hugging on his mother and dad,
Now you're confused and you don't understand,
You thought she had died you thought she was bagged,
You must've heard news about the wrong person *******,
As you're hauled off to jail,
Your face turns pail,
Your off on a trail,
Where feelings curtail,
Now there's no chance to prevail,
As you exhale you feel that's your final breath,
You successfully stabbed yourself right in the chest,
Your worries have finally been put to rest,
You will surely be Satan's next guest,
On you're grave it says, "Died During Arrest".
203 · Nov 2018
Black
Sketcher Nov 2018
I go home to an empty room,
And stare at the white wall,
Reminds me of the recess kids,
That pick on me when we play ball,
Waking up to eternal doom,
Then out of bed I crawl,
There's just way to many stresses,
So I just hide away and stall,
Eventually school starts way to soon,
Feeling worthless and small,
Always having second guesses,
It's just a constant inner brawl.
I'm white...
203 · Feb 2019
Is This Really Love?
Sketcher Feb 2019
Sharing is caring. Sharing love is daring. So is staring into the eyes of the one you love. Blaring heartbeat, whether girls or guys, below or above the thighs determines lust or love. Either way gets you high flying like a dove when I try to contemplate whether it's lie or love. Love repeated and used to rhyme with itself, cause each love is different, like you're a **** or ****, or no mom or no dad, no parents to teach you about the love you never had, here comes the guilt, tho you did nothing bad, the word "sorry" was spilt, out the mouth now I'm mad, put my mind at a tilt... confusion. Anxious love intrusion, I can feel our bodies fusing, must be looking for a bruising, she really had that clever rusing, smoked a blunt, then I'm puking, hole in one, not trying punt, so she's accusing me of cheating, like I would see someone else, while shes bleeding cause she fell, so deep in love, and always needing, a push or a shove, so there's receding instead of a clingy human melting onto me, is this really love?
???
202 · Apr 2019
Day 2
Sketcher Apr 2019
She ain’t in Paris yet, yet I’ve perished. Let these words entrap you in a nervous sweat. No, I’m not upset. No, not even worried. Forgot all past regrets. All the past has been buried. She’s my loyal girl and I’m hella lucky. I run my hands through her curls as she asks, “Will you **** me?” In the past I’ve written love, but tonight’s a different story. I’m talking bout’ lust, like when you’re feeling *****. Like when you wanna pin their cute little arms down on the bed and send your best regards straight through your **** and out into their *****, getting caught up in the glory, whether shaved or bushy... Or she’s hoppin’ on the **** and I’m holding that ***. I’m tryna’ hold her steady but she wants to go fast. It’s the tease that I’m after. I want to make her want it. We were taking a shower. She had the soap and then she dropped it. Went in from behind. She looked back all surprised. Mouth wide open and tears in her eyes. Faster, in and out. She came seven times. After four hours, I had to draw the line. Next thing you know, we are out eating at a fancy dinner. Not enough seating. I have my baby sit nicely on my lap. Lucky me, it’s a skirt. So close to the gap. Move over ******* and unzip my jeans. She has no idea that I’ve just set the scene. As the waiter comes by and asks for our order,
I tease her a bit. Rub my **** around the border. My girl scoots an inch in the right direction. The perfect accident. Not even my intention. Now I’m six inches deep and she accidentally moans. Her parents didn’t hear her. They were busy on the phone. Busy with adulting. Yeah, some important ****. Not important as my girl falling on my ****. Later that night, we get back home. I sit on the sofa and she sits on the throne. The throne is my **** and my **** is hard. Her parents are with some dogs out in the yard. Now she’s wearing shorts, so I slip off my pants.
Okay, I’m done lusting, cause my baby is in France. I miss her so much. I’m done with the lust. Back to the love. The lust is not a must. Tomorrow I write love and every other day I’ll show my appreciation in quite a lovely way.
Quite the lustful poem. Could very well be seen as disturbing. ****!
198 · Nov 2018
Happy Anger
Sketcher Nov 2018
What makes me mad,
To see my dad,
Choose escape over me,
Next thing you know,
You see them go,
Smoking another tree.

Getting drunk,
Cause your life stunk,
So depression is the key,
To getting high,
To say goodbye,
To escape reality.

All in all,
I just stall,
And wait for the days to pass,
Multitudes,
That's a mood,
Until I finally crash.

But I am happy,
The world is sappy,
I hope I can escape,
Not through all the drugs,
Through laughter and hugs,
The truth is what I'll take.

Fake happiness fills the air,
Decide to take charge and care,
Of your reality day by day,
May joy and happiness come your way.
198 · May 2019
Still Pain?
Sketcher May 2019
She’s at a friends house getting high,
She calls me, I answer, and say goodbye,
Cause she broke her word, yeah, she had lied,
In my heart I had held so much pride,
For my baby girl, but now it’s gone,
Now she disappoints from noon to dawn,
Smoking here to there, to house to lawn,
Makes me shrivel up and lose my brawn,
Makes all my bones ache,
And I’m not even sure why,
I just know that it makes,
Me feel sad and I cry,
Maybe it’s because it’s slowly killing her,
And I want her forever, forever bringing her,
To a healthy place where we live long lives together,
Maybe we can get married, I’ll ask her to be my wife,
But not at this pace, with this hurt in my heart,
The feeling that makes me want to tear myself apart,
Piece by piece, analyzing each segment,
Figure out why it hurts so I can maybe prevent,
Any more pain, cause this **** ******* *****,
Soon she’ll probably leave me for some deluxe,
Pink *****, marijuana, or coffee,
I’m lucky I have her, cause this love is not free,
It comes at a cost of great pain and suffrage,
Not a tax or insurance, no medical coverage,
A fear and worry that something bad will happen,
I’m sad and I’m done with this rap... so I’m going back to nappin’.
194 · Jun 2019
Boring Menial Tasks
Sketcher Jun 2019
I’ve got a cute girlfriend and *** is a norm,
But depression rolls in like an impeding storm,
Freezing my body in a cool sense of warm,
A mediocre stasis that has my life torn,
Torn T-shirts that I haven’t even worn,
Here I am wishing that I was never born,
Two beef sausages and a side of corn,
As I sit, no pants, and the TV playing ****,
Basically, my life is pretty **** normal,
Not casual, yet a lot less formal,
Soon I’ll be done, thank God I’m not immortal,
Please no heaven or hell, just a portal,
Straight to the abyss of absolute nothing,
No feeling or emptiness or sensual touching,
I long for this now, because I am not rushing,
Towards deaths pleasant hold that I mistook for hugging,
A sharp grasp death has, but only for a second,
For pain is only ever briefly beckoned,
In the grand scheme of earth and its myths and its legends,
And its terrors and its faults and its teachers and its lessons,
I guess I should try and move and feel,
Step away from addiction and eat my meal,
I am here now and all of this is real,
Yet I will continue to keep emotions concealed,
Cause I know that no one wants to deal,
With my mental states and possible death,
That may come to be just like the rest,
Of other teens that gave up their life,
Cause they couldn’t handle the emotional strife,
I put on an act, a face, a mask,
And go on with my boring-*** menial tasks. /:
193 · Nov 2018
But...
Sketcher Nov 2018
Sure *****, I got a nice six inch thick ****,
But I'll *** as fast as I rap this simple arithmetic.
Sure, I seem rather strong and I look toned,
But I'm slowly dying from a great lack of meat on these bones.
Sure, in school I have five A's and a B,
But I'm ******* crazy, constantly transpiring insanity.
Sure, suicide failed once and I'm still alive,
But I'm still in love with a ***** that won't look me in the eyes.
Sure I am lonely 23/7,
But during that one extra hour, it kind of feels like heaven,
Cause that dumb ***** might be in the same room,
And her bright luminescence will always liberate my gloom.
Slim Shady inspired.
191 · Jul 2019
Sorry
Sketcher Jul 2019
I’m sorry I’m depressed,
I haven’t confessed,
My love for any other girl,
In this God forsaken world,
So the simple fact,
That I told you I love you,
Simply didn’t lack,
The truth and its virtues.

I’m sorry I’m always jealous,
When I came to earth, they didn’t tell us,
That it would be this hard,
At least all the cards,
That life has dealt me,
And I know your cards as well,
Has made us pay a bitter fee,
That feels like a living hell.

I’m sorry I’m so big,
My ego is a hungry pig,
Searching for a mouthful,
Of praise which is doubtful,
When I’m too cocky,
And oh, another thing, while I’m thinking and sitting,
I’m sorry my ****’s stocky,
And oftentimes has trouble fitting.
Gonna try to write a lot more often... let’s see how that goes.
191 · Nov 2018
Lost and Broken
Sketcher Nov 2018
Met them with no tears,
But I need to see them more,
First time in ten years,
We're all broken to the core,
That makes four of us,
We have to stick together,
That's just it, we must,
We need to make things better,
I love them deeply,
And it's always been that way,
Couldn't see freely,
Just one hundred miles away,
They say the past is in the past,
But the past can not be erased,
That's why I wear this mental cast,
And swallow this metallic taste.
Met my mom and little sister for the first time in ten years. Also met my little brother for the first time.
189 · Apr 2019
Day 4
Sketcher Apr 2019
There will be days when the sun brightly shines,
The morning birds chirping,
And your beauty to blind,
My sight upon waking at a late time.
There will be days when we sleep in till’ noon,
Not busy and not stressed,
Maybe nothing to do,
You might sleep talk and I’ll say, “I love you.”
There will be days when I cook you breakfast,
Bring the food to our bed,
Back to our little nest,
And give forehead kisses upon request.
There will be days when we have the day off,
We might watch a movie,
About couples that scoff,
In funny ways, while I rub out the soft.

But there will be nights when you’re feeling cold,
Not wanting to live,
Then of course I’ll give,
A blanket, a smile, and a hand to hold.
There will be nights where you’ll question your worth,
You will keep asking why,
You’ve been put on this earth,
I’ll shrink your worries, from ocean to firth.
There will be nights when the stars don’t sparkle,
The dark can be scary,
But I’ll have strawberries,
So many dipped in chocolate and caramel.
There will be nights when the world is ending,
And I will be lending,
My love your way, spending,
The last few moments of the impending,
Doom that we’re in mentally ascending,
While the pretenders are out pretending,
Attending an unending fending for themselves,
When all I can think of is your well-being and health,
I will hold your head close to my chest,
I will rub your back to steady your breath,
I will whisper, “Baby, everything will be fine,”
Then we’ll be back in our bed like time said, “Rewind!”,
You’ll whimper and pout, sure you’ll be sad,
I mean, look around… this **** is bad,
But if you’re in my arms and you choose to squeeze tighter,
Then whatever the setting, you’ll make the scene brighter.

Some mornings, you’ll wake, and you’ll be in Venice,
And I will be quite far,
5,400 miles away,
But no matter how far away you are,
My love will extend to the furthest of reaches,
My lovely scone that’s full of peaches,
Don’t let the distance make your love for me hazy,
Only one more week till’ I see you again, baby.
Can you tell I love her more than anything???
188 · Jul 2019
Reflective Problems
Sketcher Jul 2019
I smell like ****,
After two days without a shower,
Here I sit,
With my boredom like a tower,
Towering above me,
No matter what the setting,
I wish I was clean,
I should clean my bedding,
I should mow the lawn,
I should wack the weeds,
I think I’ve lost my brawn,
Now I’ve come to perceive,
The outer problems,
With the inner,
If I clean up,
I’ll be a winner,
I’ll feel good,
I’ll eat again,
All that food,
Spilling over my chin,
Cause it’s been too long,
And I’m eating too fast,
I know this is wrong,
But I can make it last,
By telling them it’s religious,
And I have to go a week,
And then a week more,
But my mom is superstitious,
I have to clean up one side,
To get the other side,
All cleaned up,
So I can continue this ride,
This roller coaster,
Taking me through life,
But there’s technical difficulties,
Halting me at strife,
I wanna get past it,
So I called the engineer,
But I fear,
I can’t fix this,
And I’ll never clear,
Life successfully,
I know demise is near,
But hopefully,
I’ll get help from my peers.
184 · Jan 2019
Pain No More
Sketcher Jan 2019
I love you, but I want you to die. But if you killed yourself, I would cry. Then I would **** myself in the blink of an eye. I hate how easily you control my life. You are the magnet that draws the knife to the skin. Draws my hands to the ultimate sin. Draws you out to look like a *****. Get out of my head, walk out the door. Stop caring for mine and I'll stop caring for yours... hopefully... then I'll pain no more.
183 · Jul 2019
168
Sketcher Jul 2019
168
The 168,
Departed late,
A character trait,
Of public transit,
So here I sit,
On this black bench,
In the hot hot sun,
The bus threw a wrench,
Into my fun,
The longer I wait,
The more I think,
The bus won’t come,
Within the next blink,
This is my life,
Without a car,
Without a wife,
I’m going far,
With my girlfriend,
After I mend,
Our broken understandings,
And premarital demandings,
Now the bus is here,
And I bust a rhyme,
And I bus around,
From time to time,
I have to go,
But I’ll be back,
Don’t do drugs kids,
Stay away from crack.
183 · Feb 2019
Changes
Sketcher Feb 2019
If you think that since I've confessed my love that I'm not in pain and that I'm on the brink of more or less going insane, you would be fifty percent correct, cause my brain was infected like a virus encrypting the mainframe. Pitched a tent to stop the rain from ******* with my game of life. Costs a cent to view the pain of friends using knifes on their strife ridden bodies at night. Pain is plain, easy, and cheap, memories for keep, no change, just rearranged mental states. Same intentions kept on the front page, new inventions used to hide their age so it looks like nothing changed.
I have no clue.
183 · Dec 2018
Death?
Sketcher Dec 2018
I don't want to write,
I don't want to breathe,
But when my lungs might,
Have air passage cease,
I won't be alright,
I'll beg and I'll plead,
As I see the light,
Dim and recede.

I say I want death,
Until it is found,
Until my last breath,
Until the last pound,
The heart and lungs strength,
Has suddenly drowned,
No sign of life left,
No movement or sound.

I wake from my grave,
To smiling faces,
Tears fall as they gave,
Quite warm embraces,
This time I've been saved,
Not in all cases,
Shall death not enslave,
My life and its graces.
So bored...
183 · Dec 2018
Why I Did It
Sketcher Dec 2018
I ran to test the fake,
I stayed to love the real,
One point, my heart did ache,
For the girl that appealed,
To my sense of beauty,
I found out they still cared,
Though it was not their duty,
Their love they chose to share.
Probably the reason I decided to run away and the results of returning.
182 · Mar 2019
Soon...
Sketcher Mar 2019
She says soon. Soon you're mine for keeps. Soon, I'll remove your clothes. Soon, I'll kiss your cheeks. Soon, I'll hold you close. Soon I'll show you love. Soon I'll sleep with you. And then we'll raise above, that feeling we once knew. That feeling that brought us pain, that made us want to die. Crying in the rain while we stand and fantasize. Fantasize about things that seem impossible to get, but now we have these things, so why is there a pit in my stomach, when we are both so attuned. It might be because, she keeps saying soon...
Soon...
181 · May 2020
Trigger Warning Diss
Sketcher May 2020
I don't wanna get personal and hurt anyones feelings,
So I spit disses at myself, while I'm kneeling here revealing,
My ego towards the audience,
Take shots if you must,
Aim straight towards the body and,
Unveil my disgust,
Get personal and deep,
Like I'm a ******* creep,
That masturbates to pictures,
Of my sister while she sleeps,
I've got **** covered shoulders,
Acne on my back,
Incisors, canines, molars,
Covered all in plaque,
Had a *****, bu I told her,
To go make a stack,
Now in bed, I feel colder,
Cause she's never coming back,
She's out in town, feeling older,
Showing of her rack,
Gang banged by some soldiers,
That ****, then call her fat...
I had it all,
A nice ***** to satisfy every fetish,
Until I showed my insecurities,
And showed that I was jealous,
Then she held the power,
And broke us apart,
And I shattered to pieces,
And deserted my heart,
Now I take up the art,
Of writing poetry,
But that won't fill my cart,
With essential groceries,
And I'm unmotivated,
And way too lazy,
Anxiety dominated,
And ******* crazy,
Probably going legit insane,
With these "facts" my father put up in my brain,
Knowing you're thinking of a ******* shoe brand,
Whenever someone says my name,
Probably getting pretty annoyed,
When I just bought this ***** a "toy",
And she turns to me, acting all coy,
Asking if I know any cute boys,
I'll never amount to anything,
Mentally or physically,
Because I won't put in the effort,
And I'll just watch time killing me,
Waiting for the final year,
The final day, the final hour,
Or maybe offing myself,
With this depression looming over me like a tower.
I'm done.
179 · Jul 2019
Sin and I
Sketcher Jul 2019
Maybe I’ll feel better in an hour,
Maybe I’ll feel better if I shower,
Maybe I’d feel better if I had super powers,
Like making humanity stumble and cower,
Knocking a flower out of a little girls hands,
Falling to her knees and making her bow her,
Head to me as she begs and she pleads,
I think I could be the next Jack Bower,
If he was twisted and mean,
And decided to tower,
Above everyone and everything,
With his relentless unstoppable power.

Maybe my ego will cheer me up,
Maybe my ego has had enough,
I’m just me,
Dust in the wind,
Plus my personality,
And the sin.
Bored
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