what i have
is a wounded soul
but
my heart
is slowly opening again
to new things
to old things that feel new
i place my stale thoughts in a jar
and close the lid
i say "no more"
it is now
time for loving
and rediscovering myself
and redesigning myself
i let the pain hurt
but i don't let it define me
it's time to start living again

soft words
falling from your mouth like rose petals
surrounding me with a sweet fragrance
you make me believe in love

is there a place for me
a place where i am free
a home that i belong in
somebody to love me

feel the fresh morning dew
breathe in the crisp air
smell the blooming flowers
feel the peeling tree trunks
spring is here

lay with me
under the stars
tonight
they shine ever so brightly
for you and i

hi
remember me
the pretty red head girl
full of love
and fun
and laughter
and hope
i'm back now
and i hope to stay

i want to leave this world
start over again
somewhere else
with you

you tore a piece of my heart out
and carried it with you
as you wandered off
and found yourself a new lover
you cold man

there's calm in the storm
safety in its thunder
assurance in its lightening
it does not put asunder

the clouds gather
they darken
thunder rumbles
lightening strikes
the sky is angry today
throwing a beautiful tantrum
for the whole town to behold

you'd never know
we were once lovers
it doesn't show
we are merely strangers

what about them
the ones over there
the unwelcome
the unheard
maybe we should
start welcoming
start hearing
a little love can go a long way

his strength is his virtue
he carries the world on his shoulders
still his eyes are filled with light
he is at ease
in control of his weighted life
he does not collapse
ever
he prospers

slowly he made his way into her life
he didn't come zooming through
at the speed of light
flying
oh no
he was careful
thoughtful
he didn't want to rush
and ruin
something so precious
and perfect

take me away from here
out of this sad sad place
let's see new sights
let's run free
you and me

i hope you smile
when you think of me
you remember my laugh
our jokes and secrets and travels
you will always be a part of me
please don't forget me

but she's not all that she seems
oh no
she is much more
she belongs to the stars
magic unknown
a spectacular being
you just haven't looked into her eyes
they hold star dust secrets
she is a dream

her eyes are deep seas of wonder
always day dreaming
lost in clouds of thought
she's magical

if only you knew
you're all i think about
from the moment i wake
to the second i fall asleep
and as i dream of you all through the night
i hope someday i can let you know
just what you mean to me
i'm just afraid
you won't feel the same
and i'll be left
heart broken
again

today is a new day
a fresh start
new feelings
starting again
be bold
make today your day

freezing cold silence
teary eyes
no sleep

i hate feeling this down
every single day
i feel trapped within myself
stuck
i want to break the cage
run free
it's just hard for me

you always believed in the thought of tomorrow
trusting the hope of somebody
who never cared
love became twisted and dark
a blur of thoughts with no resolution
after all this time you are still so afraid
of being without him

i am trying okay
i try everyday
things just aren't working out
i am sorry

trying to mend myself
i have been told i must love myself
before i can love anybody else
i believe it, it's true
it is also very painful
being so alone
i try and take it day by day
sometimes even that's too much
at times i have some hope
at others i have none at all
but i do try

awkward silence
uneasiness in the dead quiet
tension fills the room
stale air
no escaping

i need more time
please wait for me
i promise i'll catch up
or maybe
you should move on
but no
that will hurt too much

let's travel
visit little french cafes
find old bookshops
wander through countryside
explore beautiful towns
you and me

kind of over it
feeling really gross
and like worthless
i am not good at anything
i am just really lonely
all the time
and yeah

suffocating
i am without good company
all alone
i want to breath fresh air again
feel free
i don't want to be trapped any longer

i don't know the person
that i once was
i don't know the person
that i want to be
i have no idea
who i am
but one day
i will know

who cares
who cares if they criticize
sure
it hurts
cuts deep into you
makes you bleed out
who cares
stitch up your wounds
keep going

cook up some bacon and eggs
brew a big ole *** of coffee
sit out on the back veranda
feel the warm sun
beautiful winter mornings

i wish things were better
if only i could change it all

he may come looking for you
he may move on
find another
leave you in his past
but don't you worry
you are on your own journey
with or without him

shut up
i don't want to hear it
i don't care what you have to say
you don't know me
you don't want to know me
i'm better off without you

we’re all fragile underneath
this coat of armor isn’t thick or deep
when we break it’s hard to hide
the way we hurt inside

when i come undone at the seams
my heart is on the floor for all to see
do that thing that i need
wrap your arms around me

we do our best to smile
fight the tears trying to creep from our eyes
when a smile just won’t disguise
we just crumble inside

so when i come undone at the seams
my heart is on the floor for all to see
do that thing that i need
wrap your arms around me

i can't make you love me
if you don't

you seem to know
exactly who you are
and i find that beautiful
but i cannot
find who i am
i don't know where to begin
to discover myself

don't push aside your desires
don't ignore the feelings screaming inside you
there is a reason for everything that happens in your life
nothing is just chance
or not meant to be
follow your heart
always

you're fat you're fat you're fat
get skinny get skinny get skinny
i hate myself
i hate not looking the way i want to
i hate looking into mirrors
i hate my reflection
i try to get thinner
nothing ever works
i give into emotion
ugh
what is wrong with me