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"mistreating" poems
The moment for us to say our goodbyes has come Our eyes will flood then we’ll be on our way A final farewell to what once belonged to both of us Times run out but we have plenty of regrets My brown eyed November You’ll never know what you were worth to me Even after the fights, the excruciating frustration I would walk on broken glass barefoot just to get to you To be honest there isn’t much I’d do for you But now I can’t do anything I gave you everything and you walked away I know, but you don’t Have a clue how much damage you’ve done to me I never told you my secrets I never told you everything My brown eyed November You don’t know how much you meant to me The moon fall and the sun rise Shine on our lies I knew you were treacherous Yet I still clinged to you hoping maybe it would all change Let’s end this, I want it I need to calm down My brown eyed November You are truly invaluable The ocean bathes us the sand dries Cleansing our lives You couldn’t care less My appreciation goes unappreciated If it isn’t and I am wrong Please, now is the time to tell me The karma Bad karma The cause of all of this The memories of you will stay even when you are gone Mistrust will linger but hope resonates We’re like summer in the fall, we’re leaving Mistreating, believing After all this I don’t want to be your one and only victim What do you care? You never believed in soul mates or in true love I can’t stay, even though I want to You gave false hope and empty promises Injected me with a tranquilizer and put me in a state of gullibility Was I dramatic or miserable? I know you can’t be replaced, why would I want another one like you? So good bye my brown eyed November
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Feb 20, 2014
Feb 20, 2014 at 10:31 AM UTC
My Brown Eyed November
The moment for us to say our goodbyes has come Our eyes will flood then we’ll be on our way A final farewell to what once belonged to both of us Times run out but we have plenty of regrets My brown eyed November You’ll never know what you were worth to me Even after the fights, the excruciating frustration I would walk on broken glass barefoot just to get to you To be honest there isn’t much I’d do for you But now I can’t do anything I gave you everything and you walked away I know, but you don’t Have a clue how much damage you’ve done to me I never told you my secrets I never told you everything My brown eyed November You don’t know how much you meant to me The moon fall and the sun rise Shine on our lies I knew you were treacherous Yet I still clinged to you hoping maybe it would all change Let’s end this, I want it I need to calm down My brown eyed November You are truly invaluable The ocean bathes us the sand dries Cleansing our lives You couldn’t care less My appreciation goes unappreciated If it isn’t and I am wrong Please, now is the time to tell me The karma Bad karma The cause of all of this The memories of you will stay even when you are gone Mistrust will linger but hope resonates We’re like summer in the fall, we’re leaving Mistreating, believing After all this I don’t want to be your one and only victim What do you care? You never believed in soul mates or in true love I can’t stay, even though I want to You gave false hope and empty promises Injected me with a tranquilizer and put me in a state of gullibility Was I dramatic or miserable? I know you can’t be replaced, why would I want another one like you? So good bye my brown eyed November
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46
Overcame just about everything in life Mothers death was the first Raising five younger siblings Clothing Bathing Cooking and so much more With God I stood strong. I was only 10 years old. Fathers abuse was second He really showed me what wasn't love but I felt in my heart I was showing grace by understanding his frustration over his deceased wife. The beatings (Slaps Kicks Punches Abandonment). The Blood. The sadness. His loud threats. Words that were mistreating. The pain. Yet I love this man but can't find respect for him. Relationships Started off as not caring for nobody. As I matured into this woman I started to want this thing called Love. I was afraid because I felt I didn't know how.   Come to find, that I love and love well but I'm receiving a cycle of being mistreated.. I'm still standing  Strong
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Oct 3, 2015
Oct 3, 2015 at 7:13 AM UTC
Strong
if i could scrub all the scars off my heart and body, i would in a heartbeat remove the disease that plagues me. when i was younger, i didn't fit in right with the other kids. i was always thinking about other things, reading books, drawing, and writing about things that were far too old for me. i would daydream of a world that was different, where magic lived and i could be an adventurer, all i would have to do is crawl through a door but there was never a door. magic isn't real. maybe i've become bitter as i've aged, my parents divorced the first time while i was in third grade and i watched my mother date other men and my father crumple in sadness. a year later, they remarried each other and i thought that true love existed and mommy and daddy were going to be together forever no matter what. my brother seemed happy enough, though i never saw him much because of our age gap but he would play games with me sometimes and yell at me and call me dumb other times so i assumed he was okay. though sophomore year mommy left daddy again because he was more of a best friend than a husband to her, which i understand that feelings change and it's okay and during the divorce both of them came to me in private to talk about what was going on, he did this, she did that, so upset. i had a boyfriend that begun mistreating me at the time but i was strong, i thought, i can handle this and help everyone at the same time and everything will be okay but mom left and dad got a girlfriend and i was nothing and everything just died in my hands. maybe i am bitter, my heart is breaking constantly. i remember how it felt the first time it broke, and the all the other times, what i was wearing and how my hair looked, where i was how i clutched at my chest and wailed in misery and now i just silently lie in bed on the covers listening to music. i feel defeated. i wasn't meant for this life, it's too much for me to handle. others can take moments like this in stride, get better and move on but where do i move on to what am i supposed to do i don't have any answers and i've been around for twenty years. i'm defeated. and bitter.
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Sep 26, 2013
Sep 26, 2013 at 9:57 PM UTC
twenty
if i could scrub all the scars off my heart and body, i would in a heartbeat remove the disease that plagues me. when i was younger, i didn't fit in right with the other kids. i was always thinking about other things, reading books, drawing, and writing about things that were far too old for me. i would daydream of a world that was different, where magic lived and i could be an adventurer, all i would have to do is crawl through a door but there was never a door. magic isn't real. maybe i've become bitter as i've aged, my parents divorced the first time while i was in third grade and i watched my mother date other men and my father crumple in sadness. a year later, they remarried each other and i thought that true love existed and mommy and daddy were going to be together forever no matter what. my brother seemed happy enough, though i never saw him much because of our age gap but he would play games with me sometimes and yell at me and call me dumb other times so i assumed he was okay. though sophomore year mommy left daddy again because he was more of a best friend than a husband to her, which i understand that feelings change and it's okay and during the divorce both of them came to me in private to talk about what was going on, he did this, she did that, so upset. i had a boyfriend that begun mistreating me at the time but i was strong, i thought, i can handle this and help everyone at the same time and everything will be okay but mom left and dad got a girlfriend and i was nothing and everything just died in my hands. maybe i am bitter, my heart is breaking constantly. i remember how it felt the first time it broke, and the all the other times, what i was wearing and how my hair looked, where i was how i clutched at my chest and wailed in misery and now i just silently lie in bed on the covers listening to music. i feel defeated. i wasn't meant for this life, it's too much for me to handle. others can take moments like this in stride, get better and move on but where do i move on to what am i supposed to do i don't have any answers and i've been around for twenty years. i'm defeated. and bitter.
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52
I love too much, but not too often. My heart gets broken, but I keep going. I am transparent, iridescent like glass, So when you strike with the force of a hammer you leave more than a crack. My heart is fragile, a bird with a broken wing. I thought you would fix it and make it continue to sing. I stand tall and confident in all my feelings, Something that’s scary to you who is not used to these dealings. I feel shame for the way I am. Feeling love and passion for you that I wish I could bury in the sand. A treasure left for you to uncover, Not something I should have exposed to you undiscovered. I tend to frighten away the one my heart wants to hold, Do you see me as crazy, uncontrolled, too bold? I often take broken loves words and wear them as scars. Reminders of lessons unlearned and love unforetold by the stars. I try their words on as an outfit of choice. If I can change who I am, maybe for once someone will appreciate my voice. But often times it’s too late.' My true self exposed in revelations of hate. No matter how hard I try to mold and bend, I can’t change who I am, I can’t please every man. But for some reason I never stop trying. I can never give up my mind and hearts constant fighting. I literally drive myself insane for a chance at true love. I let my mind run wild for an ecstasy that will never come. Because if I am changing who I am to achieve what I was fooled to see as true, I’m mistreating myself and I assault my love leaving it ****** and bruised. It’s funny how the world can constantly build me high, But it only took you to send me crashing through the sky. And when I fell and hit the ground, The armor I built was shattered around. Underneath it all I could finally see, The only thing that remained intact was the original me. I, myself, am my greatest force of nature. And when I try to change who I am I’m in immediate danger. The second I wear a mask to fool someone I love, Is the second that my love is broken, recanted, torn up. It’s not love if I’m not myself. It’s not true if I pretend to be someone else. I’m done being a victim in your insecure schemes, But I’m also done pretending I walked away perfectly clean. Yes I am hurt, and yes I wanted our love to be, But I won’t sacrifice myself for you I’d rather let you go free, Because somewhere, out there, there’s someone who wants me. All my imperfections and everything you made me see as faults, I consider beautiful, rare, a gift to make someone’s world halt. I’m not sorry for the way I express myself. I’m just sorry it has to be for someone else. I love too much, but not too often. My heart gets broken, but I, I keep going.
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Nov 2, 2013
Nov 2, 2013 at 12:55 PM UTC
Changeling
I love too much, but not too often. My heart gets broken, but I keep going. I am transparent, iridescent like glass, So when you strike with the force of a hammer you leave more than a crack. My heart is fragile, a bird with a broken wing. I thought you would fix it and make it continue to sing. I stand tall and confident in all my feelings, Something that’s scary to you who is not used to these dealings. I feel shame for the way I am. Feeling love and passion for you that I wish I could bury in the sand. A treasure left for you to uncover, Not something I should have exposed to you undiscovered. I tend to frighten away the one my heart wants to hold, Do you see me as crazy, uncontrolled, too bold? I often take broken loves words and wear them as scars. Reminders of lessons unlearned and love unforetold by the stars. I try their words on as an outfit of choice. If I can change who I am, maybe for once someone will appreciate my voice. But often times it’s too late.' My true self exposed in revelations of hate. No matter how hard I try to mold and bend, I can’t change who I am, I can’t please every man. But for some reason I never stop trying. I can never give up my mind and hearts constant fighting. I literally drive myself insane for a chance at true love. I let my mind run wild for an ecstasy that will never come. Because if I am changing who I am to achieve what I was fooled to see as true, I’m mistreating myself and I assault my love leaving it ****** and bruised. It’s funny how the world can constantly build me high, But it only took you to send me crashing through the sky. And when I fell and hit the ground, The armor I built was shattered around. Underneath it all I could finally see, The only thing that remained intact was the original me. I, myself, am my greatest force of nature. And when I try to change who I am I’m in immediate danger. The second I wear a mask to fool someone I love, Is the second that my love is broken, recanted, torn up. It’s not love if I’m not myself. It’s not true if I pretend to be someone else. I’m done being a victim in your insecure schemes, But I’m also done pretending I walked away perfectly clean. Yes I am hurt, and yes I wanted our love to be, But I won’t sacrifice myself for you I’d rather let you go free, Because somewhere, out there, there’s someone who wants me. All my imperfections and everything you made me see as faults, I consider beautiful, rare, a gift to make someone’s world halt. I’m not sorry for the way I express myself. I’m just sorry it has to be for someone else. I love too much, but not too often. My heart gets broken, but I, I keep going.
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51
what makes a person worthy or worthless? murmuring burden and hearse certain curses first in the furnace for the hurt or the nervous on verges of searches for earthly purpose what makes a people deceiving and evil? mistreating their equal and beating the feeble bleeding of demons and beasts of the lethal there's a reason to believe in eden of peaceful what makes a person worthy or worthless? versus urges emerge first on the surface bird of the furthest turns and then merges on verges of surges of a worthy purpose
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Sep 21, 2015
Sep 21, 2015 at 5:27 PM UTC
burdened purpose
I wish you could forget, put your heart in a glove there is no such thing as to heal, no one from above no butterfly, no turtledove do not start mistreating, you need a little shove begin reheating, forget all cheating and just love
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Jul 31, 2015
Jul 31, 2015 at 6:45 AM UTC
To my heartbroken friend
Strange danger, awaits around not the corner, but within ourselves. The danger is present in every crevasse of our being. No we do not possess the danger to wreak havoc upon ourselves. It is as dangerous as a thunder storm in July. When fireworks should be booming, spelling out words, and making us dream, just like Walt Disney. There should be pies and pies and only pies, because why not have only pies. They should be of all kinds blue, red, purple, orange the taste of a rainbow should rest in our tummies. Everyone that passes by won't wonder how did they get so many pies, they will wonder, can I have some? And I will tell them, why are you asking, the pies are begging to be eaten, can't you see? Because in July when there should be Thunder storms, not this day, I offer you pie. There will be no mistreating, no mistaking, no one will pronounce your name as cobbler in this day. And when all the mighty and delicious pies that were never mistaken for cobbler, are gone. All will know this was some very special day in July.  Where the thunder storms stopped. Where someone just as special as those pies, but probably not as delicious. Came to give us all what we were craving, and represented it with pie. To those that weren't there, they will always think, pie pie pie I wonder what was so unique about this pie.
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Mar 17, 2013
Mar 17, 2013 at 8:21 PM UTC
What is Pie
Why is it I can forgive you For mistreating me. But not myself For staying.
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Jun 23, 2021
Jun 23, 2021 at 7:17 PM UTC
My own worst enemy
comparing, replacing, mistreating, misleasing. are just a few things youve turned our relationship into in such a short time period. loving, caring, baring, always daring, are just a few things we could acheive in our relationship in such a short time period. (a.b)
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Dec 9, 2013
Dec 9, 2013 at 10:18 PM UTC
Untitled
a girl so clever, prideful, a ego so large to fool you into thinking you were at fault and undeserving, the one mistreating her. She'd have in the corner as she told you your feelings and how you were to be,  and all you wanted was more. Blind to the fact she was drowning you with her presence,  walking you to deep waters of sadness, and twisted truths. She smashes souls and closes the door without a mere glance back, to bait another into the fog of disfunction Sadly she had my heart completely, she opened it, filled like never before and crushed it because she could in a matter of years Hearts mend, but the scars are permanent
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Sep 8, 2019
Sep 8, 2019 at 5:16 AM UTC
Twisted left shattered
Drip Drop That's my heart bleeding Why are you seceding? I thought you were the one Your lies stabbed me in the heart How could you say you love me But then depart? Now , I'm trapped Trapped by the voices in my head Telling me I ought to be dead Going from one another Mistreating the one that's unlike the others My heart is saying NO SANTE NO but... My mind is telling me GO SANTE GO BOOM There it is did something I regret I just knew that boy was a threat Drip Drop There's the tears Smearing my glasses "I learned my lesson" Now the voices are saying "Babygirl wipe those tears, LEAVE ALL OF THEM ALONE, JUST ATONE Stay low, keep your head up Don't let them know BANG BANG Let me out! Let me out! I'm now free
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Apr 21, 2015
Apr 21, 2015 at 12:13 AM UTC
Trapped
A glowing presence appeared before me; was I awake or was I asleep? I thought her first a stranger; she wasn't a stranger at all. “What is your name?” I asked. She answered: “My name is Photon.” I thought how weird a name to be called. “Who are you and where are you from?” …thinking how mysterious she was. “I was discovered over a million years ago, and abide by whomever gives me cause!” “You have known me all your life.” she exclaimed. “I am powerful, mighty, and transcendent. If not tamed, I deliver widespread loss and destruction.” “Only God is omnipotent and omnipresent!” I clamored. “That is true; but I was created that way for a reason. Mistreating me results in death; respect me, and you will rejoice. I can be a good servant, or a cruel master. It is you who must make the choice.” “Are you some kind of a god? Seemingly irritated she replied: “I am not! The power lies in your hands, not mine! You decide to use me for good or for bad. I must respond to both. I can be a friend or foe...bring darkness or cause a light to shine.” As her illumination began to dissipate, I  asked: “Where do you go from here?” “All over! My work will never end. My task is be a companion forever, to those who chose not to believe... but the true, righteous, and faithful, they shall never see me again.” “Just one more question,” I pleaded, 'before you go, tell me: who are you really, and when will you again transpire?' “I travel the world over and manifest wherever I am called. My name is Photon; but I'm mostly known as fire!” By Milton Lopez Delgado May 16, 2016
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Jun 2, 2016
Jun 2, 2016 at 8:51 PM UTC
My Name Is Photon
A glowing presence appeared before me; was I awake or was I asleep? I thought her first a stranger; she wasn't a stranger at all. “What is your name?” I asked. She answered: “My name is Photon.” I thought how weird a name to be called. “Who are you and where are you from?” …thinking how mysterious she was. “I was discovered over a million years ago, and abide by whomever gives me cause!” “You have known me all your life.” she exclaimed. “I am powerful, mighty, and transcendent. If not tamed, I deliver widespread loss and destruction.” “Only God is omnipotent and omnipresent!” I clamored. “That is true; but I was created that way for a reason. Mistreating me results in death; respect me, and you will rejoice. I can be a good servant, or a cruel master. It is you who must make the choice.” “Are you some kind of a god? Seemingly irritated she replied: “I am not! The power lies in your hands, not mine! You decide to use me for good or for bad. I must respond to both. I can be a friend or foe...bring darkness or cause a light to shine.” As her illumination began to dissipate, I  asked: “Where do you go from here?” “All over! My work will never end. My task is be a companion forever, to those who chose not to believe... but the true, righteous, and faithful, they shall never see me again.” “Just one more question,” I pleaded, 'before you go, tell me: who are you really, and when will you again transpire?' “I travel the world over and manifest wherever I am called. My name is Photon; but I'm mostly known as fire!” By Milton Lopez Delgado May 16, 2016
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I had a dream, There was a sunset, It's the end, It's time to rest, There was a playground, It's an escape from reality, It's meditation after a personal conflict, There was embrace, It's the need for affection, There was warmth, It's happiness for where I am, It's hope and unconditional love, There was a sorry, It's for mistreating you, It's for hurting you, There was you. And there was me.
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Mar 30, 2014
Mar 30, 2014 at 2:21 AM UTC
Interpretation
i would lay in bed most nights and think a lot. it happened when i was wondering what the hell i was doing. why i was still here. i thought of every last terrible thing i allowed others to do to me. how i forgave, again and again. how much hurt i further allowed. how deeply i knew that i was being treated badly but i still chose to not walk away. i wanted to hug myself. i wanted to sob. i broke my own heart more than others ever had for me. it took me so long to realize how emotionally unattached i truly was from myself. how not one drop of self-love existed. except on these nights, when the full realization would hit me, and i would weep for myself. over every last terrible thing i endured and accepted. the future mistreating i was currently allowing, and would allow to continue. i lived in such shadow of myself that it took years to realize i was good. that though i hate myself, i never deserved any of that. i am good. i lay here some nights with burning eyes and wetness upon my cheeks. breaking my own heart over and over thinking of everything. knowing i still don't have the strength to completely walk away. is this how i am going to live? in constant emotional turmoil and self-inflicted abuse? is this all i am? all that i ever have been? am i just going to remain miserable, allowing them to keep hurting me? i wanted to hug myself. i began to somewhat love myself, i guess. no one will ever break your heart as much as yourself.
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Dec 4, 2016
Dec 4, 2016 at 2:16 AM UTC
this is how i began to forgive myself -
You with him. And it appears you're happy. Until I heard the news. That according to them. He's mistreating you. I hope that's not the case. Cause in my heart. You still-have a special place. But you seem fair from my vantage point. Then your friends states that's the image he wants. Until I heard the news. I wouldn't have believe it. I just know. If ever you needs me. Here I'll be. Then again. Knowing how I feel about you. I might have to step in. If only to protect you. You deserves to be loved. And not treated cruel. Because you deserves more. Then what he wants for you.
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Sep 3, 2012
Sep 3, 2012 at 8:30 AM UTC
You Deserves More
You were all that I was not needing. You stuck the knife in my side that will not stop bleeding. I chased you like a high, fiending. Lies that translated to me believing. Looks are misleading, decieving. Kindness that always leads to mistreating. Words are said without any meaning. I doubt myself. I doubt what I'm feeling. I close my eyes pretend I'm not seeing. When I walk through the door just know that I'm leaving. Numb, no more feeling.
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May 19, 2013
May 19, 2013 at 9:57 PM UTC
Untitled
Nestled between the covers Are two stories unfolding, Unraveling in the mystery of How to detach from it. The stories and memories, Meshed together with an infinite tale. A wordless story, making its imprint on our flesh. Bound, yet boundless As birds that perch upon the edge of a wire. Potential for motion, A flight into a blanket of Love. Shadows follow, for once cloaked around our bare shoulders like a guide. Mistaken as us, and comfortable mistreating our views. A grim reaper of our own Creation. A once thoughtless prison, unshackled now in warmth of our presence. Recognizing a strand of Familiarity, creating an endless family from Kingdom to Kingdom. We are not what we think, And yet we think this into the now. This creative moment of backwards And forwards, as we sleep A sweet lullaby Of juxtaposition and paradox. Mirrors are doorways Into our Selves, Onto a great pathway of Questions that need no reply. Voiceless songs and melodic silence, Intertwining in the mix of Magic and Absolute Truth.
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May 3, 2016
May 3, 2016 at 2:30 PM UTC
Melodic Silence
He's rough around the edges So I keep my heart protected He says he loves me But I have second guesses He says "You're a Queen to me" Then why is he mistreating me ? In my eyes , hes a King to be I treat him like peasantry To see if he can handle me I know im hard to please Really I like the simple things I wish I could maintain my mentality Of being used to the casualties Or the fact that he's blind to me I would change drastically But he's a man to me So hopefully he can handle me To conquer my insanity
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Apr 16, 2014
Apr 16, 2014 at 5:25 PM UTC
in•san•ity
There was a buzzing, woke me from my bed, (in the place between my ears) calling me to a place where I'm not alone. Dreams are fantastic in lovers arms instead, especially when you've been lonely on your own. Faint, just a whisper, forgotten; clumsily on the edge of infinity, ready to drop into a pool of what's rotten, you're lost in sweet serenity. Blissfully alive.                   But where is your buzzing?                                                    Where is your soul? Surely you would have noticed the subtle silence of a mausoleum, the clattered bones of yesterday only scatter when ya see em. And I'm too 'fraid to 'pollogize for my mistakes, misdeeds and mistreating you. I've seen the floor that you whip me with, and its not worth meeting too. So I've decided to surrender                          to that sweet sweet serenity. I've decided to surrender to that sweet serenity, running on dreams, standing alone on a crowded sea of enmity. (I just don't care anymore!) Its time to sleep. its time to open this door and find myself home.
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Jan 23, 2017
Jan 23, 2017 at 10:29 AM UTC
I Think Its Sweet (Serenity)
Are any of you aware of our estate, Where we stand as a nation of unreliable faces, The fabricated ambition ... Erases We vote for the lies because nothing is promised, Those dictators said they’ll try but how do we know they’re trying You with the eyes, whether you have 2020 vision, Or legally blind . You shelter your sights But where is your reality What about the young bloods who set out to be like Us. You shelter your trust, you agree to settle for lies. You’re always deceiving yourself and mistreating yourself. Don’t blame him or her, blame yourself If not blame me Blame me for not smacking your *** Blame me for not blasting your *** Blame me for leaving you ignorant to the fact that you Are sheltering the wrong things, Do better for yourself, or else nothing will change.
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May 14, 2015
May 14, 2015 at 3:29 AM UTC
Untitled
I’m not quitting, I will not… But I’m tired of visiting that market Holding pages that show others my worth, Constantly reminds me of my failures In not inculcating traits of brighter mind; Them alphabets and numbers mesmerized, My all happiness, every dream revolved around a wooden bat Father, always scolded me, saying; “Time never returns, returns only regret” My adolescent arrogance refuted it But now, I know the price. My life was straight I meander it with my mistreating, Of dreaming a dream that I couldn’t afford Of not confining them in the periphery of the countryside, Letting time to stroll away sitting on a pew Not making enough efforts to catch in the middle, Father, you were right How I long to go back in time And start again from the beginning, With all the cautions and advice of your’s, Accepting all that previously refuted; Those afternoon walk in the heat of June Shirt soaked in ‘rejections’ Clothing a dead Will that dies daily in Loo, All absorbed in counting failures I wait for a bus to come With an unknown number That could take me all the way to that ‘wish factory' place I heard in childhood, But the dust fly and settles in the eye To awake me from delving into another dream; “Those who take long ladders to reach 98,” the mother says “seldom wins without bitten at 99.” But my life turned out to be mazier Than the game of snake & ladders, How I abhor to go back home and confront her Whose trust in Gods diminishing by my defeats, Whose every prayer is going unheard I am the victim, she a sufferer; I remember the days of my college With immense dreams and a never-dying spirit And an age where everything seems possible Where every person looks beautiful An age with profligacy and extravagance And complete ignorance of the world, Later when I stepped my foot into reality; The clock’s hands had taken so many rounds That a fastest run could not chase them. I’m tired of answering the same question again and again I’m tired of waking in the morning anxious With the fear of rejection, That travel from bus to interview place seems infinite With endless emotions heaving up and down like a tree on a windy day, I’m tired of living a life that I do not control I know, after one hour from now I’ll exist no more, And this is not quitting I just want to start it all over again…
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Mar 6, 2019
Mar 6, 2019 at 6:55 AM UTC
Forgive Me!
I’m not quitting, I will not… But I’m tired of visiting that market Holding pages that show others my worth, Constantly reminds me of my failures In not inculcating traits of brighter mind; Them alphabets and numbers mesmerized, My all happiness, every dream revolved around a wooden bat Father, always scolded me, saying; “Time never returns, returns only regret” My adolescent arrogance refuted it But now, I know the price. My life was straight I meander it with my mistreating, Of dreaming a dream that I couldn’t afford Of not confining them in the periphery of the countryside, Letting time to stroll away sitting on a pew Not making enough efforts to catch in the middle, Father, you were right How I long to go back in time And start again from the beginning, With all the cautions and advice of your’s, Accepting all that previously refuted; Those afternoon walk in the heat of June Shirt soaked in ‘rejections’ Clothing a dead Will that dies daily in Loo, All absorbed in counting failures I wait for a bus to come With an unknown number That could take me all the way to that ‘wish factory' place I heard in childhood, But the dust fly and settles in the eye To awake me from delving into another dream; “Those who take long ladders to reach 98,” the mother says “seldom wins without bitten at 99.” But my life turned out to be mazier Than the game of snake & ladders, How I abhor to go back home and confront her Whose trust in Gods diminishing by my defeats, Whose every prayer is going unheard I am the victim, she a sufferer; I remember the days of my college With immense dreams and a never-dying spirit And an age where everything seems possible Where every person looks beautiful An age with profligacy and extravagance And complete ignorance of the world, Later when I stepped my foot into reality; The clock’s hands had taken so many rounds That a fastest run could not chase them. I’m tired of answering the same question again and again I’m tired of waking in the morning anxious With the fear of rejection, That travel from bus to interview place seems infinite With endless emotions heaving up and down like a tree on a windy day, I’m tired of living a life that I do not control I know, after one hour from now I’ll exist no more, And this is not quitting I just want to start it all over again…
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Treating my feet to the beat I leap from my seat despite the sleet, take my heat to the streets the concrete is freeing from: the deceit which we deal in the obsolete (which I'm fleeing) the people we're mistreating which we repeat and repeat and it's all self defeating when the elite just replete despite our attempts to delete or just maybe deplete... so I retreat to the sweet beat of the blues as the pavement meets and greets my shoes down the lanes and avenues just hoping for something nice on the news
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Feb 13, 2016
Feb 13, 2016 at 8:41 PM UTC
This Beat
bird on the wing perched in the sun begins to sing bunny on the hop mistaken substitute hubris while mistreating others we elevate ourselves the science behind personality testing the theory of motivation the fact that a certain trend will occur to satisfy a need behavior is driven by an internal state of disequilibrium this lack of balance is the source of all conflict, large and small achievement, power, affiliation and intimacy are described as secondary needs and our personal reaction to these states determines our personalities when you pass a person on the street remember to pay attention to the fact that they are filled with desires to fill their secondary needs the gaps add up to the person
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Apr 9, 2014
Apr 9, 2014 at 12:01 PM UTC
no title 1
There’s a flame Lit with in A flame that burns for one purpose There’s a life Two souls meant to be one, But Split in two There’s so much pain Heart ache, for the souls that are lost A pain meant to keep the souls apart There is an emotion Love an emotion that is meant to be pure, but instead is manipulative and deceiving Only because many souls have given up on meeting So they began hurting and mistreating Those who are naïve Until it becomes a cycle of misleading But there are those who keep on fighting For that one who is meant to complete them The one is meant to love them like they need them to And at first it might seem strange Because we don’t understand how someone Could know what truly love is That love is supposed to Burn like the flame Hurt like the pain That you’re supposed to feel that way Because that’s what love is meant to do This emotion connect so many things Not just lovers, but also friends if you opened you heart and not your mind You’ll find that love is very simple it’s not a technical complication or logically correct It’s supposed to come with scars and bumps But only because you’ll never know what’s good until you’ve dealt with bad Love is not just a breeze it’s a hurricane of emotions But after its all say and done You’ll find yourself in a place you’ve never been . . . next to the one
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Jul 9, 2015
Jul 9, 2015 at 2:18 PM UTC
There's a flame
Soldier on, In war they cried. Blood battled till beaten, They fear the terror. Created in stride, Of their own horror mistreating. I fear the race is already lost, No sound mind is speaking. When fear is created by oneself, Lost is the logic of reason.
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Dec 13, 2015
Dec 13, 2015 at 11:32 PM UTC
Soldier On