I've taken to the wind that moves what I may never see
And yet I feel it close enough to shift inside of me
It's there one day and gone the next but never for too long
Exhaling truth and bringing us to right where we belong
I never would have thought to put my life into its hands
But nothing else can even touch on what its strength commands
I'm done with all the chasing and escaping when I can
No longer will i fight the kind of human that I am
I've given all I am to you, the breath of all the world
So take me where I need to go like I'm your little girl

It's possible to be aware of nothing anymore
and let yourself walk freely through the human you adorn

the sky provides for everything to grow and weather all
but people who uproot themselves can never take the fall

I see them lying everywhere, in piles and in droves
collecting like a breath of air inside a cloud of smoke

and every day they breathe their last, as least that's what they say
because of your anatomy you cannot walk away

So here you are a seventh time forgetting who you be
and every single chance you've had to faithfully believe

you talk about wanting to be without us
and cut me to pieces like nobody does
i won't be defended by anyone here
i've learned to accept to them nothing is dear
and all of the past likes to conjure itself
to hide in the body of everyone else
i cannot be bothered to know what they'll say
they change with the seasons, they change with the day
so why should i focus on judgmental words
when i can grow wings by the wisdom of birds
admire and watch the whole world from above
and come down when there is a shortage of love
reminded by evil and moved to restore
i lived like you once but cannot anymore

I think about the words that have been moving with the time
Directly intersecting at the center of our minds
To know that we as people will be couriers for life
Could have us feel a burden we would rather not invite
And that's when something happens to the rest of all the world
When sleep becomes elusive in the eyes of boys and girls
And just because they're open and the pupils are intact
Does not mean they are learning how to properly react
The fight to have a voice should not put blood upon our hands
And if you stop to listen you'll begin to understand
The universe's song does not belong to anyone
But if we sing together then our work here will be done

to grow apart and walk away
or tell you what I did today
my head is hot, my heart is light
so take a match and make it right
if there's a flame, a flicker still
I'll blow it out and wait until
the smoke is gone to look for you
and if you're there I'll start to move
remain the way we are and see
I'm what is you, you're what is me
and even though we'll never have
a road to run to take us back
the fear that was has ceased to live
and out of death comes I forgive
to love you once is all wish
to make it home, my hope is this

have finally decided
that i am letting go
i've just enough volition
remaining in my soul
.
.
.
.
.
.
cannot continue living
as though i need to stay
collect the shoes i wore here
.
.
it's time to walk away

I look at all the filth and see a beauty I'd define
As something only humans would be sure to recognize
A hand upon the skin and every nerve will seek its warmth
But there is just enough of it to leave you wanting more
I should've never done it says my hazy little head
I'm sick of being wanted and I'm sick of being read
Remember what I told you when you asked me what you did
I could regret it now but I can see we needed it
I've been beneath the earth, a disappearing kind of girl
And everybody knew it, no surprising all the world
But coming from the person I have met within myself
I've learned to understand I am to be nobody else
I haven't what it takes to put my body in the sky
So here is my confession: I am not afraid to die

I've taken to the sound of waves
a sea that carries me away
And maybe I'll return one day
I'll come to you without delay
but something else is pushing me
Toward edges I could never see
Been moving so unsteadily
For what seems an eternity
My blood is cold, my lips are blue
I need the sun to make it through
And if I don't, be seeing you
I do not know what else to do
It's either here or there for us
It all depends on who I trust
I will not choose until I must
The enemy - to be unjust
And whether I admit it now
or far along the line somehow
The waters rise, they break me down
to let me fight or let me drown

who is it that speaks to you when no one is around
when nothing in the world could ever satisfy a sound
it could be that a single word has lived inside of you
and hid itself from everything, protecting what is true  
we pull ourselves together by ignoring who we are
and look at all the faces we have worn to get this far
but don't you know what happens when you see yourself again
your character remembers who you are when you pretend
it may have taken longer for your senses to respond
than you could e'rve imagined it, the thought of holding on
the only things that matter now be clarity and time
you're given just enough of both to put away your pride

Have some water, drink the calm
I have been here all along
At the edge of all you are
you may think you've gone too far
One more step is all it takes
Turn around and feel the shakes
Breathing heavy, thinking fast
you will find your way at last
Not because you couldn't then
But today begin again
It has everything to do
With the body you will lose
Settle in to something more
Something that you had before
You are here and Love is now
Like the rain it's coming down

I don't want to ask the question anymore
It's not my place, I've let it go
And even though I've said too much already
I've found the strength to tell me no
It's not like I control a person's seasons
The winter comes and then it ends
But as the snow becomes the melted waters
In you forever I've a friend
It took this long for me to get here
A place I should have always been
I guess it's time to let you speak now
I guess it's time I let you in

Perhaps it was a night you don't remember
When your soul indiscreetly smothered mine
And there in the middle of the moment
I waited for the sun again to shine
I thought there was a purpose to the madness
The way my life began to rise and fall
But realizing day and night are lovers
I came to know the meaning of it all
I wasn't here to mend your broken spirit
I wasn't here to write you like a book
I must've thought I stumbled into shadows
For you to give me such a heavy look
But ours are not the eyes of the assassins'
we may destroy but we could never ****
I'm certain there is nothing left to wait for
We've seen it all but we are breathing still

when people travel far and wide
Enough to make their way inside
a world that tries too hard to be
The definition of complete

I cannot help but find escape
In something not so far away
It's not above and not below
A place beside Abednego
The heat will burn but reassure
you came to be and always were
A passerby of life and death
And lungs that breathe the purest breath
There's nothing here for you and I
Except the time to say goodbye
And when the words prepare themselves
you'll need to look to no one else
your heart will be your head and soul
Derail the thought of human cold
The cover gone, the flesh undone
Recovery to Babylon

i used to toy with memories like children play a game
and let myself believe i wouldn't make it through the day
the sun would tell me differently, the moon would have me speak
and everything I couldn't say would shut my mouth for me
i put too many yesterdays beneath a bitter tongue
i conjured up the heaviness of all that i had done
without a sense of rationale i'd put myself to bed
and crawl into the corners that existed in my head
they're not like i remembered and i must've grown too tall
i can't believe i ever thought i knew myself at all

the days i am reminded what it is to be alive
i climb out of my body through the thoughts that i contrive
there's nothing but deceit when you believe you're on your own
that life is death, is coming quick and you will never know
but there is something humbling about the pressing on
despite the state of everything convincing you it's wrong
if you can let your screaming head's cacophonies fade out
you'll taste the peace you once forsook for bellow's heavy shout

You filled me to the brim with all your tendencies to fly
To put my head in places somewhere deep inside the sky
And maybe I'll return to you a bigger dreamer still
I'll whisper something pretty to forget that I am ill
I'm sick for all the moments I spent looking through your thoughts
When you would lay beside me and the world would be forgot
I haven't been this tired since I fell asleep in you
Enough with all the flying and with all the thinking too

Ive found the common thief to be inside of me and you
without a face to call his own becomes the people too
And when there should be nothing left your heart begins to fight
It looses all the spoils you had gained to make things right
And if it seems impossible - believe and give it time
It may take an eternity for you to never die

i think i will survive if i can wait a little more
i'll wait until
the last of you is walking
out the
door
the hours have been good to me
the miles
make it
clear
that life can still be beautiful
without you being
                           here
it's when i press my lips to yours
that everything
returns
and opens up a world with an intensity that
burns
enough with the explosives
i don't want them
anymore
the back of you in front of me, i'll run to close the door

you and I are made of something breakable and small
Reduced to what the masses say they cannot see at all
But when I let you in to me you're bigger than myself
You take up all the space I couldn't give to someone else
And down we go together - deeper faster, slower still
Remembering the moments we unraveled at our will
And all it took was one of us to make a move that day
Now look at where it's gotten us, we've fallen all the way

tooth and nail I fought for you in every way I could
Despite the empty feeling that I never understood
I am not really seeking any more than all of you
Though all of us collectively are either one of two
Allow the range of colours to distort what you have seen
And watch yourself forget the people holding onto dreams
If you are not a sleeper then you've woken up in haste
Perhaps there is a reason you accept yourself this way
But even if there isn't and you're living just to breathe
Then I suggest you slumber, give your body what it needs

To say it's just as true today as it was long ago
Would be the only truth I turned a lie to be alone
But you are still a picture framed so perfectly to me
Your colours be the song I sing before I fall asleep
The part of me that died with you I want to live again
I want to keep my arms around your love until the end
And when we've conquered death and time, forever will be ours
Reminding us eternally our love is who we are

What of the words that have rolled off your tongue, tired and heavy in sound
Can they still puncture a heart that is worn, waiting again to be found  
Telling the people what they want to hear does an injustice to speech
If they all say you are gone without hope, they've put a limit to reach
It's like a drill that is carving a hole, making it harder to hear
Voices of those who are fully aware, able to speak in the clear
Time between pauses will soon disappear, leaving your mind to the buzz
But if you can focus the quiet will come, settle the head that once was

I use my words too mindlessly for anyone to be
Affected by the air I take to give my voice a beat
And when I swallow all of it my silence wakes again
To give my thoughts the company I haven't in a friend
I roam the quiet corridors and try to find a way
To speak without depending on the flesh I wear today
But all I see is nothing when I open up my eyes
I'll say this off the record - we are whole if *nothing dies

what would happen if I walked a thousand miles a day
   And put myself in places where I do not have a say
It's nothing but the soil and the monsters that I see
They're crawling out of spaces somewhere deep inside of me
I want to leave them everywhere and write about it too
But know they're coming back for me the moment that I do
  So if you want a story have my words fill up the page
It doesn't matter anyway, the monsters know my name

I've holes inside my body no one's ever even seen
My skin is made of something that is thick enough to be
A layer of confusion in the eyes of me for you
But if you want to want me there is nothing I can do

I'll separate the years and cast them out upon the sea
And watch the salted water move, collecting our debris
"There's nothing left to carry," said the wave as if it knew
That we are not each other's, time has split us both in two

So what is the extent to which you killed yourself today
That minor slight incision - did it carry you away
  And if it’s not the pain that makes your body like a drug
Then what is it that causes you to seek that kind of love
You thought it would be easy to detain what you could see
But something else has happened & your mind is not at ease
  I know you want the answers but they never seem to come
At least that’s what you think with all your patience going numb
And now the only remedy you seek is gone before
your limbs can ever feel it, ’til you’re lying on the floor
  Remember you were someone ‘fore you gave up on yourself
The kind of hope you carry’ll never leave you in your Hell

Tonight I want to speak until my voice does not exist
a word is only worth the breath a speaker gives to it
absorbed into a tongue where comprehension has a name
Where everyone is part of what makes all of us the same
and you can dot the eyes to keep the pressure in your head
The movement of the earth around the sun above your bed
But in the windy cities there is nothing you can do
To open up your lungs enough to permeate the truth
My teeth are falling out but I can mumble what I mean
The syllables enough to take this matter to extremes

if we had our own vein in the place that we share
I think I'd give you my all
Although I'm uncertain of so many things
you are the grace in my fall
Not in the way that the people connote
Time an illusion to them
Deeper than indigo purple can go
I am the shade in your realm
Stop the mechanical hands that I hold
Tell me the cold is a dream
Tell me the taste would be bitter and stale
Skin cannot claim you and me

What is it that lingers
in the corners of your breath
Something like a cancer
or the things you never said
And if it is a tumor
do you know what you have grown
A burden of hypocrisy
for you to call your own
It's not about the masses
and the tissue you've destroyed
Those things become so trivial
the moment they're enjoyed
But that's when all the heaviness
begins to cut away
At every single part of what
you didn't stop to say
You want to know the answers
but forget to mind the time
And that is where the disconnect
begins to realign
The days that you are living and
the days that you have ceased
When night is like an enemy
that you yourself released
And you have hidden nothing, says
the terror in your voice
I guess you should've spoken like
a man who made a choice

So what besides the voices can your talking undercut
you'll minimize reality until you self destruct
And you may try a thousand times to justify your words
But if they have no merit they'll forever go unheard

So I appeal to you, the people telling me to speak
I will not go in circles entertaining what you seek
And if I've been a puppet on a string I didn't make
I'll sever every limb and let myself completely break

a fool of curiosity
      i never understood
          why medicating mentally
   was questioning the good
cannot explain it more than this        
                   except to also say
that who you are can walk with you        
      but also walk away

So how did I become the kind of person that I am
By changing every part of me I couldn't understand
I wonder what I'll find inside the skin that I suspend
Or maybe what I've lost is more apparent in the end
And where is all the evidence I carried on my back
The weight of it has turned it into something inexact
A haziness pervading what I once believed to be
The only inconsistency I wanted to perceive
Secure in all my shakiness but never unaware
That I was going down a road that wasn't even there
And maybe in my head I thought I'd save a place for you
Until I came to realize that's something I can't do