What if all the matter you could ever hope to have
Turned you into something that was never meant to last
Who would then determine whether this could be reversed
Should you seek asylum from the kingdom of the cursed
When would be the moment you would need the help to come
Pick you up and pour you out and give you time to run
How could heavy feet even determine where to go
Buried in the kind of mud where nothing ever grows
I guess the only hope you have is underneath it all
Beyond another border where your feet are standing tall

Drip drip drip*
(to) flip the switch
Lay you out
remember this

Flattened lines
without a spine
Backbone gone
you're out of time

What to do
I'm split in two
Halfway there
we aren't through

Needle's cold
so veins can hold
Nothing more
than what you sold

Took what's free
atoned the sea
Running red
with all of me

I'm eaten up by everything that gathers on my skin
The taste becomes familiar just before it settles in
And as my concentration goes from weak to weaker still
I foot the path ahead of me but cannot find the will
To be another passerby to everything I see
Avoid the one who made it near impossible to leave
Undress me with your subtleties before I walk away
Before I tell you all the things you never thought I'd say
My lips are moving faster than my body ever could
A race upon the bone along the back of where I stood

I strike up conversations with the things I want to know
A glance can be enough for me to let my body go
It takes me only minutes to remember where I was
And soon I'm looking back on every single thing I've done
In time I am surrounded by the ghost I left behind
But only to be haunted by the creatures in my mind
I try to tune them out until I cannot anymore
Though they can't tell me anything I haven't heard before
And what a wretched cycle it can be to comprehend
To entertain the thought that you're a story in the end

Tell me where you're coming from so I can write you off
Then I will put a question mark in place of what you thought
The Darkness brings the sleepyheads together in the night
But only those who know the sun will wake up to its Light
I wasn't even listening to anything you've said
I thought you would've noticed I was every kind of dead
I guess the people talking now can do it in their sleep
And force the words to leave their mouths, developed tendencies
But somewhere in the time it took for me to move my lips
I took a breath and let it out before it even clicked

I'm always away I'm but never in bed
Never exhausted enough to be dead
Stuck at the edge of the breaths that I take
Nobody passes my way by mistake
I used to see what I purposely could
Stand at the grave like a tragedy would
When did my legs dig a hole in the ground
How do I sleep in the places I found
Tell me a story to summon my thoughts
Pull them apart and connect all the dots
Scribbles and phrases aren't easy read
Impossible only for those who deceive
Nothing is ever the truth when you hide
Pieces of fiction to which you subscribe
Finish the sentence and check what you wrote
Don't be afraid to let everything go

You force yourself to stay within the lines you didn't draw
I'd ask you why you're doing this but cannot be so raw
Instead I'll go along with all the choices that you make
And put the pressure somewhere else until it is too late
So when the ticks and talks become a voice you do not hear
Remember then that spoken time has said, the end is near
Asylum is for everyone but not for all the same
I think you understand it too, you see the patterns change
Directly interfering with the process undergone
Will neither make it easier nor any bit less long
I wonder who I'm talking to or what I even say
I've stepped away from every sense of sense I ever made

I've built myself a tower at the bottom of the sea
The water rises high as it envelops all of me
I've turned into a swimmer and the fish don't seem to mind
I wonder if they'll ever see that I am not their kind
Or maybe we become the things we choose to be around
With all of these dimensions who's to say that I will drown  
The point is if I do there's somewhere else that I can go
If everything is everywhere, we're always never *home

You carried me for many months and thus became my world
My hands are shaped like yours because I am your little girl
I could've let you go if you had said that's what you wish
But every word I heard you speak was opposite of this
I saw the life you thought you lost and held it close for you
Believe me when I say that's what I knew I had to do
I look at you the same today as I did even then
Before I ever breathed the air of everywhere you'd been
And there are times when all I need to do is go inside
To let the warmth of who you are wash over like a tide
The closer that I come to you the less I feel alone
I guess it's true what people say - some people feel like home

Tell me something more about the life inside your head
Where it is you go when every part of you is dead
Maybe I can come along so you won't have to talk
I'll see it with my own two eyes, I'll follow as you walk
And even if you set a pace that I cannot maintain
I'll make my way with caution like I'm falling in the rain
I'll read you like a story you have bound within yourself
And yours will be the only book I set upon my shelf
I'd like to spend my days rereading every single page
Let life into your words, they're not a trap, you're not a cage

I came to see the casket
An open heavy thing
And what I saw inside was
Decomposition's hymn

A song without a spirit
That never should have died
Remember when you killed it
Remember how you cried

The reoccurring nightmare
That shook you from your sleep
Had made its way outside of
The consciousness you'd keep

The ceremony's over
And now I must confess
My person is the coffin
The coffin is my chest

The winter wasn't cold enough for me to feel its chill
The ice is slowly melting now as I begin to spill
So what of this analogy and how does it compare
To what is really happening, I haven't been aware
That everything inside of me is nearly dead and gone
Yet I will never let myself forget where I went wrong
The purpose of a memory I've harbored all this time  
While years of every season passed, you never left my mind
I wonder where your feet have been, the soil and the sun
Have written on your skin with words that may have even stung
I want to tell you many things and hear your story too
I'll start with an apology for what I did to you
I let myself become the cold that I was breathing in
I let it stay inside of me for how long has it been?

Something aside of the things that have come
falls on your head and you're suddenly numb

Waiting for nothing, there's nothing in sight
no one can tell you to pick up the fight

So many voices are carrying words
even my own become lost, go unheard

It's taken me longer perhaps than it should
to let understanding wash over the good  

I need the water as much as you do
I'll take a sip and the rest is for you

the air put your head in my own
said youll never leave me alone
but when will it scare you to stay
you walk, you cannot walk away
i need you to learn how to breathe
undo what youve done to the breeze
the weight will be carried by few
but shared until nothing is true
is that what you want to desire
to make of yourself but a liar
ive heard all the thoughts you dont speak
theyre all too familiar to me
you dont have to hide in my head
it mustve been something i said

There came a night when everything I never knew I kept
Escaped my skin, a whisper's breath - you held me and I wept
And somewhere in the time it took for me to settle down
The simple act of being calm seemed all the harder now
From then a salty kind of rain would daily burn my skin
And multiply the passageways through which I'd let you in
I needed them to flood enough for me to let you out
Create the kind of waterfall that made a single route
And as you'd drift away from me, return the strength I lack
Return to me a state of mind I want to set on track
Within the absence you'd supply I'd shed my weary gaze
And take another step toward the frame for which I'm made

I can see your shadow coming closer in the dark
Growing like a tumor while I slowly fall apart
Nothing like a moment to remind you that you're weak
Grazing on the bits of truth you never fought to keep
Yet somewhere underneath the skin of what you have become
There exist the rudiments of silences to drum
But how do you identify a peace you cannot see
And put your trust in every part invisible to me
I am not the one who claimed your body as my own
So I will sit here ripping all the stitches we have sewn
And as the holes expose themselves the light begins to dance
Gradually consuming, letting go of what I can't

a touch of some humility may put you in your place
reveal the inconsistencies you thought you could erase
the kind of metamorphosis that colors on your skin
and turns it into something rather gossamer to spin

there  cannot be another you and nothing can compare
you're free to weave a web of what you want, as you so dare
the only thing that will affect the qualities you keep
is what you store inside your head from everything you see

the doors you close and open up are actually your eyes
the things you see make up the tree that either lives or dies
but this is taking far too long, perhaps I've said too much
yet isn't that the very thing that begs the human *touch

get down from there you little girl
'cause your escape is not this world
and when your feet touch earth again
release the fear that you will end
your flesh and bone does not define
a filter of a different kind  
on top of everything you are
exist'a mind, albeit scarred
like sap that forms upon a tree
your wounded head will bleed to be
and all the matter you once had
returns to you, do not be sad
'cause little girl there's hope for you
remember me, I fell once too

In living with my
apathy I've
come to know it well
A side
of me beside
of you, I'm
lonely but I fell
Remember
when you went
away, a
key was all
I had
I never
took it to
your door, I
wanted to so bad
And any
time it took
to put it underneath
the ground
Does not
compare to what I
felt when
you came back around
The ins and outs
of you and I have
always mimicked this
A paradigm we
couldn't
change, we sealed it
with a kiss
A salty kind
of bittersweet
is all that
I can taste
The rush in
wanting not to
take a
single step in haste

I know a man who melted in the layers of my skin
And I will call him Icarus, now where do I begin -

I met him in the middle of the earth and all its time
A moment I cannot recall, a true forever's why
The wax from every question mark his mind could ever draw
Had taken on another form, a vein he never saw
And so it was a pair of eyes much different from his own
Became a house he'd recognize and even call his home
The company he found within enabled him to wake
A kind of curiosity he fought but couldn't shake
For underneath the rigidness his character sustained
Was but a man alive and well with everything to gain

to mine -

for what is my flame to your fire?

My mother's eyes have known the things that move inside my brain
And if you ask her what she sees her answer will not change
Her voice is like a lullaby, she sings to give you rest
Enduring through the brokenness - my children, you are blessed
Remember where my father's been and what he gave to me
I tell you this because he too, once swam inside the sea
The thoughts you choose to follow out will lead you where you wish
But when the water disappears do not remain a fish
The air cannot accommodate the ones who need to drink
So recognize the time you take in every way you think

I don't know what the numbers mean, they float inside my head
I count them in between the ticks I try to put to bed
And if there's any logic left you will not find it here
Considering the apathy has made itself unclear

Or can you force the senses to appease another thought
To find a new beginning where you've tied a tighter knot
Suppose interdependency be vaguely unaware
Of any past security you swore was ever there

The case for explanations then, may need to be adjourned
In retrospect, the evidence has already been burned
So if you'd like to sup the ash, then turn it into bread
The stove is set, the fire hot, the recipe - regret

Beneath her ****** purple eyes the bandages unwind
Reveal the fruit of every hit she's taken to her mind
A stripe away from damages that cannot be undone
She whispers in her timidness, you are the only one
The seeker floats around the words she speaks into the night
And she can feel a quiet breeze solidify their flight
I'll be there soon, I'll watch the moon, I'll travel back to you
The bruises heal and she appears, she finds him withered too
I've missed the conversations we have carried through the years
A hope, a light, dynamic sounds surrendering my ears
I want to bounce until the day we reach the second stair
Repel the dark and sorry things that tangle up your hair
And so the strands were compromised, she let the pieces fall
Upon the fringe of sacrifice she floated through the wall

And so the world will spin inside a mind it never knew
To fill it up with earth and bone and even me and you
The speed of light above it all has noted every name
And used the dust of starry space as ink it wants to lay
I see the budding fingertips let go their feather pens
And rest upon the very heads of fever stricken men
The rain has come in many forms to offer some reprieve
But even now can only reach the ones who do not leave
The backs of those who walk away have turned into the mud
A looser kind of figurine devoid of human blood