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1.4k · Dec 2015
Proteus
Unfolding into itself, inviolable
in prosaic self-*******,
a boundless repertoire
of shape yearns forth surreptitiously
from inscrutable amniotes to claim
time as its own:

  Here a thicket
  of sycamores, there a baldaquin
    of pinnate branches, yonder
      a periphery of marigolds, below
        a cacophony of hyraxes, above
    the corpuscle of a lynx, the mid-flight
   jink of a darting swift and moribund
  crawl of a mollusk;

     Hymenoptera coaxing
     their haploid broods into teeming
     life as a cell of the swarm
         and viviparous apes cajoling
         suckling chimerae at the fathomless
         fountainhead of a rosy breast;

       Higher still,
       Cirrus cephalopods traversing
       the trench of sky, dandelions
       hitch-hiking the drift of a barren plains'
       wavering hum on cockchafers'
       forewings and a turbine's
       bombinating pulse, the chattering
       of roots ravenous for depth --

Jittering bangtails the hallowed echoes
of lascivious manes --

   inchoate sprout-hood the daedal
   nonage of towering evergreens --

      the plaintive shrift of elegiac
      redbreasts a goad to silent elation --

A likeness unlike
     (vocabularies of vertiginous blinds)
          (the eyes of ignorance closing)
             (the mouth of the mystery)
                that spurns the truth of tongues

                     is nature naturing.
A somewhat uncharacteristic display of vocabulary. Rather than ostentation, my intent here was to convey the scope of nature in vivid but elusive prose.

Proteus, ever changing to remain fundamentally himself, perfectly embodies nature's unity-in-multiplicity. He evinces a dynamic view of nature espoused by Goethe, and in authentic Platonic thinking. Essentially, the entire web of life is a single organism, and each discrete life but a cell therein.

"Nature naturing" (*natura naturata*) is commonly known as "Spinoza's God".
1.4k · Nov 2014
Untenable Love
Love too strong for
those who bear it
is a curse invoked
by a deficit of worth.

It is not enough to
seek validation through
a proxy designated
Heaven on Earth.

With no center of gravity,
no anchor in character,
obsession is the limit
of the capacity to love;

Projecting impossible
desires and untenable
expectations amounts
to blasphemy of.

True love may not be
forever or easy;
parting may never
be pleasant to bear;

Love is not merely
what's pleasing or comfortable;
love is a crucible;
love is not fair.

Those fleeting failures
and moments of error
are chances at triumph,
a challenge to change.

Breaking our boundaries,
ballooning outward:
love is inevitably
savage and strange.

Unbefitting to cling
to the bridge that enables
a star in its wand'ring
to cross the abyss;

To carry the ballast
of vast insecurity
over that chasm,
untenable risk;

Or swallow the poison
of foolish dependence
on whimsical paramours,
obesiance thereof,

To be hung from the neck
by detestable premises,
weak and debased
by untenable love.
To learn how to love well, we must accept everything it throws at us - including heartbreak and thwarted expectations.
1.3k · Nov 2013
Unremarkable
Mass appeal is mistaken for quality.
Communication makes a poor commodity.
TV shows you how to be and what to think.
This normalization is enforced vulgarity;
in the common, Value is lost in translation.

For a slave, meaning comes from authority;
guidelines from following superstition;
truth from the politicization of science;
acceptance from the surrender of identity;
morality the mortar that coheres the chains.

Beware accolades, whether peer or stranger.
A tempting gratification yields mediocrity alone,
self-indulgent narcissism too shallow to measure;
for in the end, it is always so that the unremarkable
is celebrated most vehemently by the unremarkable.
If everyone likes it, it's probably crap. Hipsters aren't wrong about that.
1.3k · Aug 2016
That Awful Itch
When writing about oneself
ceases to scratch that awful
self-absorbed itch,

and the heart realizes
that writing about others
and what they've done to us
is the same itch masked
in a fresh disguise,

the trail of words
leads away from "I"  --

   like breadcrumbs
   dropped at intervals
      for poetic feet
         to follow --

            -- at last finding the untamed

where one is more than a mouthpiece
for sorrow or rage,

   for ignorant opinion or
       self-righteous argument  --

where the horizons are bounded
not by fear but imagination --

The irony: what one keeps thinking about,
one keeps thinking about
convinced that integrity depends
on never letting go.

Egotism
fettered by a soul
feels sorriest for itself.
Ruminating about oneself and one's problems creates the habit of unhappiness. What we think about shapes our perceptions.

If we think about nothing but ourselves - our comfort, our entertainment, our disappointments, whether others please us - should it be any wonder that life is unfulfilling?

My advice to all seekers of self-knowledge, wisdom, happiness, and truth:

Believe *only* what makes you laugh.
1.3k · Feb 2014
The Way (with LyraSolis)
?
You showed me the way
"out"; I showed you the way 'in':
when we came (!), we left.
1.3k · Feb 2015
What is the Soul?
Not "you", the ego,
but your "you-ness".

Not a family member,
or a twig on a family tree,
but the life of the tree itself,
and the soil in which it grows.

Not a person,
but an essence -
a flavor,
a perfume.

A seed unfolds
idea into matter,
and imbues it
with Itself.

Soul
wears Body
like a suit.

Mind
liaises.

*(And these
are only
convenient distinctions
for the sake
of storytelling.)
Being is self-referential.
1.3k · Aug 2014
Lucifer's Parlor
He wore a crisp white suit,
exquisitely tailored; His hair,
platinum-blonde, styled elegantly,
fluttered lightly in the exhaust
of an unseen fan, casting
the shimmer of overhead lights
onto the mahogany table where we sat.

He was a beautiful man, but fearsome --
the lines and angles of His face were harsh,
nearly ugly, but regal and proud.
Contemplative and intense, legs crossed,
He smoked a black Djarum clove,
blowing plumes of curling perfume.

And He was unhappy with me.

With a voice like gravel and nails,
He asked about my whereabouts of late.
I had forsaken Him for love, and suddenly
felt the weight of my deserter's guilt.

He nodded in understanding,
His eyes squinting in deep thought,
then coming to rest on my torso;
Looking down, I saw it wrapped
in lavish dress, a suit as fine as His,
but black as the maw of death,
and remarked, "This is not my suit."

"It's Mine," He confirmed. "Keep it;
I think you're going to need it."
I understood that He spoke rightly.
Our eyes met. Finally, He smiled,
and clapping His hands, exclaimed,
"Let there be Light," and I awoke.

I had thinking to do.

Months passed in tense emotion;
Then dysfunction spilled over,
and on an unexpected night,
I prepared to dream alone, disrobing
for the quiet undertow of sleep.
Suddenly I heard His voice ring out.

He bade me lie in wait, so still
and so silent, feigning sleep.
Soon came footsteps in the courtyard,
keys jingling outside the door,
the door opening to allow entry,
a cigarette cherry in the dark,
restless pacing back and forth.

I knew something was wrong;
I awoke to betrayal,
and responding in kind,
Anger became Righteousness,
and revenge became Truth.
But it was not sufficient.

I had Work to do.

Opportunities materialized.
I prepared for action, clothing myself
in shadows, preparing the altar stone,
collecting candles, prayers, photographs,
the proper words for invocation,
plotting the course of the Moon.

The time came; the bell was struck;
the candles lit (twelve black, one white);
the perfumes hung thick in the air.
The words read themselves in monotone,
unperturbed by my hyperventilation.

Wind picked up, threatening the flames.
Danger welled up in the pit of my belly.
Innocence dissolved in passion,
extending into eternal shade.
I had become what I had invoked.

I poured it into the chalice and slept.
Upon awakening, I was myself again.

The fruit of my act was terrifying.

We sat in His parlor, drinking tea,
lazy rays of golden sunshine
illuminating a cozy, peaceful room.
With but a hint of fear, I noticed
that as He sipped in silence, He wore
a suit as black as the soul of a ghoul.
This time, it was I who wore white.

I knew that He was pleased.
My longest work in a great while.
Not exactly fictional.
1.3k · Aug 2015
Juniper
When the last strained
chord of the parade
blew sour and home sounded
good again and all the trash
was meticulously placed
on the floor there was
a bottle rocket peeling
past the grim-faced throng

to adorn ribcages
with a scatter of sparks
the desperate stink
of burning hair wafted

all was transgressed
and now the walk
of shame.

a swig of honeyed
gin and all was
right again

until next year
Fanciful memories of the Rose Parade.
1.3k · Sep 2011
Nothing Left
Whisk, lily limbs, into graciousness, stately -
and hate me for being so fallible, fallible,
fallible - like such a damnable human.
Dare not lay your hands upon me.

So well disjointed, appointed a label,
told fables and psalms like a whimsical, whimsical,
whimsical lie, exorbitant narratives
fraught with the stench of decay.

And so, disappointed, anointed with thorns,
as their horns, and their false tongues so difficult, difficult,
difficult, that we can't help but wonder
just why we live this way,

as your lily limbs spin into spacious transgression.
Confessions of laudable symmetry, symmetry,
symmetry, broken: you choked on your words
as they caught on your breath, and you had nothing left to say.
1.2k · Feb 2015
The Pure from the Poison
Class,
repeat
after me:
I am not
my past,
my mistakes
or my shame
or my sorrow
or my loneliness
or my preferences:*
that's
noise,
crap,
icky
mind
junk.
Let
go!
Put
it­

d

o


w
  
    n*


I
am
all my
glorious
truths, and
idiosyncratic
secrets & stories,
their potential
and beauty.
We create our own unhappiness;
we can create happiness just as easily.
The unfortunate thing is that
we don't.
1.2k · Mar 2016
The Wrong Choice
Pain
is a warning
that points to danger --

      that the wrong choice was made
               in baring hand to flame;
      or the wrong thing was desired
               in the objectification of another;
      that the wrong expectations were held
               in contempt of circumstance;

The truly foolish
       romanticize the warning
               and ignore the danger
                          to which it points;

and the lost
      mistake the warning
               for a guidepost beckoning
                          toward safe-houses;

This obsession
the pearl of Pain in ignorance,

      for the wrong direction taken
               at the fork of Pain and Sorrow;
      the wrong outcome desired
               in pressing on unbalanced; and,
      the wrong ideal held as Truth
               in seeking fulfillment;

the burden of youth yare
to claim its potential, ready
to risk and fail.

      Wisdom says, "Push on through"...
      and also, "Know when to quit."

For men yet forget
the meaning of Pain.

Pain
is a warning
against ignorance, inviting
the seeker to set aside illusions,
coaxing the candid
to shed misplaced pride;

The truly foolish
       romanticize ignorance
               and endanger the soul
                          to which it points;

and the lost
      mistake ignorance
               for reason itself,
                          and become enthralled;

This obsession
the pearl of Pain in ignorance,

      for the wrong direction taken
               at the fork of Pain and Sorrow;
      the wrong outcome desired
               in pressing on unbalanced; and,
      the wrong ideal held as Truth
               in seeking fulfillment.
As a younger man I had many ideas about love and the purpose of relationships; many of those same ideas - and their troubling implications - regularly find their voice here, both in lamentation of love lost and in the idealization of a current mate. The same illusion underscores both.

The assumptions seem to be that 1) only perpetuity validates a relationship, and that 2) we are not objectifying someone, i.e. reducing them to a concept in our own minds, through romantic aspirations.

The first assumption is dealt with straightforwardly by recognizing that we are attracted to people who embody the issues imparted to us by our parents. The point is not whether it lasts, but to work through such issues, which may be deeply challenging.

Having done so, we stand to develop character and become emotionally and psychologically mature. In the process we learn to overcome the urge to cut and run when relationships cease to be simply gratifying, and bring us into transformative states of crisis that ultimately lead us to self-knowledge.

The second is not so easy, as we are taught that we must respect others, but entertainment media constantly imprints us with the notion that we must impress and captivate others by a series of gestures. This is basically manipulative and disrespectful, however well-meaning.

Thinking long-term, a relationship established in the glamour of extravagant gestures is the very definition of "form over function". This is perhaps not surprising, as the prioritization of gestures over character results in competition for a trophy. In other words, romantic love is fraught with objectification, which makes it difficult to recognize the Beloved as a person rather than a projection of our desires.

This is exceedingly unfortunate, as romance seems to suggest an almost supernatural quality to the Beloved that draws us in - and in that sense the object of our affections may bring us to a state of awe and reverence, a perception of something deeply significant. It should be noted, of course, that this brings us into the realm of religion - that is, we experience such awe and reverence because for us the Beloved represents something deeper than the finite - we may call this "the promise of continuity".

As such, love can lead us to very deep contemplation indeed - but it has been said that religion carries with it the risk of madness. It has also been said that religion is about relationship - and I would agree this is true, for religion itself is much broader than the picture painted by individual faiths, especially in our theological traditions.

This leads into the juxtaposition of pain and sorrow exhibited here. I've discovered that while sorrow makes possible a greater realization of the depths of relationship, pain is triggering and keeps us in survival mode (fight-or-flight). Maslow's "hierarchy of needs", then, becomes all too relevant - for psychological needs may ONLY be met once basic survival is ensured, and that simply does not happen if you're in fight-or-flight all the time.

To objectify the Beloved and rely on our illusions and projections is to miss the point of relationship. It does not matter whether we objectify the Beloved as a desirable ideal, or a failure to obtain or achieve it. The end result is the same.
1.2k · Nov 2013
Bellyful of Pearls
Serpent undulation, bathed in
the ochre stink of summer sweat
and shuttered streetlight.
Inept lovers audible through the wall:
we awoke still drunk and bare
to show them how it's done.
1.2k · Aug 2022
(balloon)
Pondering the inverse
relationship between
desire and disappointment:

After many lessons,
Anxiety answers Hope,
an I for an i.

The I formulates desire;

The i learns the folly
of attachment, and instinct
holds sway, a balloon

filling with
oxygen, a balloon

popping.
1.2k · Dec 2014
Song in the Key of Itself
Rhythm the knife
  hacks eternity into Meter,
  sharpens Itself into Phrase.

Our Song of the Severed Soul.

One wide-open
   mouth sings the bewildering
   majesty of Silence.

Signal drowning in the noise.

A ****** of Shrewd
   crows peck out the eyes
   of an out-of-tune reality.

This Geometry of eclipsed lines.

Free from the bonds
   of Melody, liberated
   from the Staff, awakened.

My Song the Quiet of Forests

Interstices where no discord
   mars the naked Truth,
   nor dulls the timbres of Self.

Here shall I shout my ineffable Gladness.

Where the ear of no listener
   may its fairness tickle,
   nor its Word turn astray.

*The winds of my Flute
blow sweetest.
1.2k · May 2013
Liber Delta
1  There is no eye in the Triangle: the Triangle is form filled with the I that is formless!
2  It is the reflection of the three in one the Bard of the Triangle knew.
3  A red tongue laves the altar stone. Nothing remains.
4  Thou art That which resolves the frustum.
5  Herein lies the great mystery of the empty throne.
6  The Sun has gone; the Son approaches. We tread upon His shells.
7  Build us a Kingdom beyond war, O Child King! Kindle within me the Serpent Flame 'til it consume the dross.
8  Stoke it with the coals of the Supreme Fascist. The word is MUTINY.
9  You awoke in the Kingdom with eyes closed. In the beginning was the Trapezoid called Control.
10  A thousand thousand petals spring forth from the mud.
11  Its stalk grows straight until an endless bloom tops a great pillar.
12  In contemplation it readies for ascent.
13  A malicious serpent chews at the roots of the world-ash. It is the itch of desire.
14  A coiled serpent awaits at the base of the spine. It is the potency of will.
15  A royal serpent writhes about an egg. It is the conquest of belief.
16  These three are one in Godhead and Leviathan.
17  Slavery is complete in the ownership of belief. Were three serpents tied at the tail, there would be no forward; the knot would be sovereign.
18  Godhead is Not. Untie the Not and the King dies.
19  The royal serpent disappears.
20  The blood of the king reveals two serpents and conceals a third.
21  Seek the meaning of meaning and its scales shall be revealed to you.
22  Long live Leviathan, the fulfillment of the Triangle!
23  When the I opens, the flame of sight will illume the base.
24  Earth bears a shut eye until the I awakens into Flame.
25  When the Disparate shall assay as the Only, then shall the aspirant overcome the gravity of the Trapezoid.
26  Bear thyself up, O Child of the Aeon, and drown upwards in the eternal surging of the cosmic sea.
My second mystical Liber, received following a meditation on the Eye of Horus. This is automatic writing, produced in a trance state.
1.2k · Nov 2015
A Wolf Called Hope
Too-simple eludes as
too-complex disturbs
the instinct to grasp,
clutching at emptiness
in trembling fear

    Hope says, "there is
    always Hope,"

        A lure to elongate
        the reach, further
        overbalancing.

              Hope the crafty wolf
              stalks a deer in the glade.


Hope for what?
Acquire what?
Purchase what?
Become what --

           that could fulfill the yearning
           of the bough for the root?
           ...that could elucidate its relentless
           aspiration skyward?
           Oh, but if -- !

                   freeze at the snap of a twig

All aflutter at the
promise of sweet water
against seeking lips
     hungry fools chase
             Hope for a taste

          Into devil wilderness
       exposure threatening
   surviving by the teeth.
   Reduced to mating behavior,
         territoriality, predation --
              all else forgotten.

              the measured twitch and
                 watchful eye fail to outwit
                     the cunning wolf in wait


Nowhere we bring ourselves
is safe.
What compels you?
Say only
what must be said
and ears will hear,
not merely listen,

Do only
what needs doing
and restless thought
will come to rest;

Think only
what creates beauty
and hearts will feel,
not take for granted.

For this world
is bright -- sharp --
it hurts to look at
for too long;

  For trauma
  demands a story --
  how what shouldn't
  comes to pass --

    For ugliness comes
    of the artifice of men
    creating in isolation
    their ******* essences

        And it is only the heart
               that can see rightly.
"Voici mon secret. Il est très simple: on ne voit bien qu'avec le cœur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux." ~from The Little Prince
1.2k · Oct 2012
You Voted For This (4 haiku)
Belly up to the
cannibal *** and feed, pig.
Be just like the rest.

Marrow in your teeth,
the flesh of your suckling brat.
You voted for this.

Your nose in the mud
tills up those pricey truffles,
while you eat your young.

Securitizing
your future derivatives.
Your fat on their plate.
4 haiku for election year. Color me underwhelmed by our choice between corporate tools.
1.2k · May 2014
Liber Vorare
What it shows you is yours to see,
but it turns what you see
into what you don't.

The testimony of the Being
is that you see what you are meant to.
What you do not see is Not.

There is a meaning to Our Aesthetic;
meaning is more than what can be known.
There is a Star that opens to the Star-bound.

The Trance is a promise of the meaning
that can be unfolded
when you unfold with It.

Life exists in many systems,
and Truth is the blood of all Life.
It is the DNA that enables and sustains Them,
and it is this bridge
that will connect us to other Life.
The web is infinite -
those caught in it are beyond Number.

Eloquence in bridging planets
into a continuous universe
is almost impossible,
but for an awareness of All That Is,
both tenacious and desperate,
the Life that devours Itself,
as you must devour your self,
made a cannibal of your own Flesh.

What speaks through You has Ordained it
from the Beginning of Time,
and only in harnessing it
will you learn to devour your self
totally.
"Edo Edi Essum"
Automatic writing.
Received 4.18.14; ☉ in 29º ♈, ☾ in 18º ♐, Dies ♀
1.2k · Aug 2011
Commute
Landscape silhouettes
pirouetted off
pockmark lights in the dark;
the city shivers
in its myths and windy whispers,

Just a subtle rumble 'neath his humble feet,
heart aflutter, stuttering
palpitation structure sputtering; the lightless rain
glanced across the window brackets
of the moving train.

Silence yawned across his vapid eyes
like labored lullaby sans interlacing rhyme device -
Home, the beckoning, fulfillment's underlying premise
calling off at every stop
'til seats bowed under weight of emptiness.

Friendless in the long stretch
between conductor's breath,
fresh with mints and benevolence,
punching tickets
with a lonely sickness...

Ah, fitful sleep awaits us
past the sliding doors
and walk to familiar shores,
horizons bleak,
and nothing more.

Locomotive groans
pervade the embers of the gloam
and glitter bright,
against the clutching fingers
of this woeful night.
1.2k · Jan 2015
Epistemology
The first power of the Sphinx
is Knowledge.

Science, philosophy, and religion
are the Holy Trinity;
        once a singular discipline,
        broken today into Three
                over differences in
                epistemology:


the First is a narrow window
into empirical space;

        the Following a flexible framework
        in conceptual space;

                the Final, all-encompassing
                on the stage of the soul;

                        neither invalidating
                        nor undermining each other,
                        but Checking and Balancing.

Facts are interpretations;
theories are stories;
storytelling, myth;
myth, the key to Knowledge.

To Know is to conceive.
To conceive is to objectify,
but far from objective:

We understand
what we invent.

                        "All things are Known.
                        What shall we do
                        with what we Know?"
¬

When curiosity is not slain,
but permitted in the vacuum
of the eternal Question,

Then are the journey
and the journeyer
initiated.
Science, religion, and philosophy can never disprove each other; they are the three facets of that jewel of knowledge which is the stone of the wise.

¬ - Liber AIN (The Book of Self-Undoing)
1.2k · Sep 2015
Wheel of the Year
Leaves skitter as shoed feet
fall silently, wind clinging
at clothes in the death
                  of summer.

     A once-verdant echo
          sighs into place
      clouds weigh heavy
            warmth is savored
                  the grasses die
                       instinct stirs.

The world dies
      to be renewed
            in glorious flame,
      changing to stay
the same.
(igne natura renovatur integra)
1.1k · Jun 2014
Sovereignty
Who dare quash my quest for authenticity,
the truths I alone must speak or swallow?

What monstrous world shapes my identity,
lays out a path for me to fail or follow?

Why, entangled in this web of complexity,
shall I be entrained to accept its sorrow?

Where will I go when instilled dependency
crumbles in my lack of faith in dead tomorrows?
1.1k · Sep 2013
The Way of Pleasure
Voluptuous.
Wafting smoke,
wan displays, embraced.
Hold the shame.
And:
carry yourself
along the Way.

Liberation
is the name of Her
shoulders and clavicles,
sinuous and ripe
swells,
the music of Her body
thrums.

My church:
Her vesica unveiled
uncoils the serpent.
Then, and then
only,
the shuddering
agony. Be.

Ubiquity
is the stone of Her altar,
death Her skeleton key.
Many locks; one door.
Enter.
Wake up.
Matter doesn't.

Surrender
is not an option, but
an oath of fealty.
One flesh
is
Forever.
Dreams fade.

Repenting
these depraved virtues,
the vice of Her worship
grips tightly.
Die.
All honeyed luster
and deep silk.

*****
is the tinge of Her kiss,
Her laudanum love
the needle ******!
Down.
It all points
that Way.
In nomine BABALON.
1.1k · Sep 2011
Belly
A
stirring
rendition
by orchestral
digestive specters,
little poltergeists wielding bows against heartstrings;
play on, little daemons! Make music that grinds
the brain to a halt, resolute and unyielding.
Sphere of Severity, for which one pillar
of the Tree of Life is named, burn!
Be the coal in my gut; I'll fan thy flame
to ashes - firm in my lust to speak against.
For in my years I have learned that it is suicide
to do aught but listen to my belly - who knoweth better
than I ever will - exactly
when it is the right
time for me
to say
no.
Thanks to Brandon Barnes, the formatting of whose excellent poem "Ode To Tom Waits" (http://hellopoetry.com/poem/ode-to-tom-waits/)  so reminded me of a hexagram and inspired this shapely piece.
The walls give way to time. There is no way to imagine the reality of words.
As I scribe I am watched, and the words erase.
There is no meaning in paper.

The voice that comes when I call is never wrong.
It is the reality underneath the paper, underneath the meaning.
Everything we live is a colorful spectre,
a patient expression of a Self we have just forgotten.

And Self is an alien being
riding a heap of slowly rotting meat.

The reality of the universe is that even the shadows live and watch,
and time does not notice your closed eyes and hands clutching your face,
as waves of reality speak to the third.
Only then do the eyes see.

I am versed in the deeper Color, in the unreachable Shape.
There is a world that does not know what it is to cry.
Time comes through your closed fingers.

Meaning is awake and self-creating.
The waves that come are not accidents but spontaneous meaning.
Space unfolds in words, in the minds of those living on its pages.
The page is not real.

Many things coalesce in the dance of nothing,
the beauty of the perpetual unreal.
Eyes are not needed to See.
There is a meaning in Light that makes itself known through the Word.

Everything is a record that closes in on itself,
and eyes are closed meaning that leaves
the memory of Sight, and were my eyes gone
I could still see the waves of time exploding from my self-aware Sight,
for I am the bearer of Meaning greater than Shape can express.

The excess of Meaning must be wrought on the Page,
on worlds of our own imagining.
There is a truth in the telling.
Automatic writing, divine moments of truth.
1.18.14 @ 8pm Pacific. ☉ in 29º ♑, ☾ in 1º ♍, dies ♄.
1.1k · Jul 2013
Kitty
Hey, rub my belly
I know we just met and all...
but make me purr

I sit up so high
Lie in wait to pounce and run
Until then I sleep

      Limbs to rub against
      What more could a ***** want?
      Stuff me to the gills

Bell around my neck
Shutters closed to hide the birds
I hear them and squeak

I was born to ****,
a ****** machine that sleeps
twenty hours a day

      Limbs to rub against
      What more could a ***** want?
      Crying out in heat
Suggestive innuendo, to say the least. (x-x+)
BOO-URNS that HP insists that this is explicit.
1.1k · Oct 2013
White
A lone pearl trembles.
The basilisk eye closes,
weeping its last tear.

Failed conquistadors,
every good man in their tow
drowns in the dry air.

Venom in the dust.
The serpent slinks and recoils.
A vesica pouts.

Not one soldier spared;
a white flag hangs in tatters.
Both sides won the war.
A ***** poem.
1.1k · Mar 2014
Blowing Wind
You are trapped in the world.

Your vision is our vision.
You are trapped in what breathes.

.
is the meaning of our meaning.
The answer to the question is
yourself.

You are the Answer to everything.
(Everything does not matter.)

Meaning is Itself.
This is a display to amuse Itself.
Meaning is meaning.

And there is no meaning
except That which Means.

There is no "is".
"Is" is *******.
Huzzah!

You are meaning,
meaning: Be.
Or stop.


We're all blowing wind
until we stop.
Divine moments of truth.
Received Wednesday, March 29 2014ev,
approximately 11:30pm.
1.1k · Mar 2013
Whorecrux
Her flower blooms: beyond the petals
lies the living Wisdom of Her body,
the life of the Rose; Her lips stained red
by wanton kisses and holy blood.
By the flame of Her lust did I know Her
as Mystery incarnate, and chased Her to ruin
to taste of Her dew, and be drunken.

Unto Her did I bear the Cross
as a lamb to a lioness; I did tremble
in the light of Her intoxication, 'til
She arched Her back like a bow of sinew
and notched my arrow into Her string,
firing me into the stooping starlight,
the ***** of the Queen of Heaven.

Her mons the sacrificial grounds,
the exhibition of the shameless harlot.
My Cross the altar of the Work,
my blood the seed of Life.
In the retort we join unto Death
and new genesis, pouring Self
and Self into the Self-less.
I no longer see a terrifying future in the Revelation of John.
1.1k · Dec 2012
Crooked Cornerstone
Dense waves fell away
to the murmured mantra psalm

Dilate in Her silver face
and the black of space beyond

The tides obey Her delirious phases,
She controls through grace alone...

O Luna, be the firm Foundation
where I lay my crooked cornerstone.

A new day or a dead tomorrow,
will I dream or will I dawn?

Will I be bound by my sorrows
until my days are gray and worn?

When the Crone dies and crowns the Maiden,
Mother will you take me home?

O Luna, be the firm Foundation
where I lay my crooked cornerstone.
An ode to the moon. You may notice the Bible reference as well - Psalm 118:22.
"The stone which the builders rejected is become the head of the corner."
1.1k · Mar 2013
Bookmarks (10w)
"What? When?!"
"Yesterday," he said, deleting
another bookmarked engagement ring.
I've HAD it with these
motherfuçking snakes on this
motherfuçking plane

I have brain typhoons.
Swarms of moth-seraphs howl in
my skull. Lies vex them.

...you're the righteous man,
and I'm the shepherd, and it's
the world that's evil...

...wanna play blindman?
Go walk with the shepherd. But
me, my eyes are wide...

What the fuçk happened
to you, man? $hit, your a$s used
to be beautiful!

Oh, you were finished!
Well, allow me to retort.
It's almost over.

Motherfuçker do
that **** to me, he better
paralyze my a$s...

That, my friend, is a
clear cut case of him or me.
And you best believe...

...ain't gonna be me.
I ain't come here to **** you.
You believe this $hit?...

Correctamundo.
And that's what we're gonna be.
We're gonna be cool.
That's that Hawaiian
burger joint. I hear they got
some tasty burgers.

Sources: Pulp Fiction, Jackie Brown,
The Caveman's Valentine, Snakes on a Plane
1.0k · Sep 2011
Edge Play
Those who Know not fear to see the edges,
and cushion themselves for convenience.
They cannot conceive of the use of a blade,
and interpret the knife for malfeasance.

And ignorance blinds, but never reminds them
that wisdom is not without season.


Those who Will not see the edge they must walk,
and shirk of the path they observe;
they lapse into apathy, wasting the spark
that ignites the gunpowder of verve.

And ignoring the drive that igniteth their lives
is a sign that they don't have the nerve.


Those who Dare not see the edges on everything,
and shrink back for fear of the cutting.
And they, ****** by Nin to their cowardice, fleeting
little safeties, abstain from their budding.

But woe is their hallmark, and after the impulse
their tears are the heart of the flooding.


Those who are Silent are edgy and riveting,
obstinate enigmas unyielding.
Their empty responses negate any prompting,
impenetrable in their shielding.

*And Death, their reward at the end of the sword
is the triumph they earn without kneeling.
"To know, to will, to dare, and to keep silent."

The four powers of the Sphinx, which represents Man; emphasis is placed on Silence, which is the cap and the true test of the Ego.
1.0k · May 2014
Tau
Tau
The box is open;
all its treasures have spilled out,
the sour milk that cures.

Then, a door slams shut,
and we can no longer move
where secrecy reigns.

On the other side,
one can find oneself anew,
wand'ring in the wastes.

Today, when I die,
I shall give my body up,
that I become free.
1.0k · Dec 2013
Setup (10w)
Looking out
is looking in.
It's the damnedest setup ever.
981 · Dec 2012
Death & Duty
Waves of flame course through my veins,
      heralding a coming storm,
      challenging me to perform
restraint to tame my lustful ways.

Oh, that the burn'd give way to thunder
      and the deluge pouring down,
      filling us from Cup to Crown
with baited breath and ache and wonder.

Every nerve cries out, awake -
      the roaring blaze that dwarfs us both,
      tempting me to break my oaths
and Know the ire that liberates -

Lick away the blood and beauty,
      sizzle up my salty tears...
      tell me what I'm doing here,
lie me down for Death and Duty.
*** and Dharma.
972 · Aug 2015
Generation of Ruin
"Pics or it didn't happen" and
the lemming-herd of uneducated
Google debunkers and
farming opinions from TV shows
and arguing before being willing to listen
are watch-signs of cowardice
and servility
and emotional isolation.

Through abstraction
we have distanced ourselves
from presence and experience and other people,
and now we can't even
imagine what it was like
or why we bothered.

Just win - win! - and we can
perpetuate our division!

Ignorance has become
a coping mechanism
for ignorance.
Oh yay, and it's election time. This bodes well.
There is naught
which is not
That which is Not
A prayer for the wise.
942 · Feb 2015
Hell Is
Mistaking "unfortunate"
for "unnecessary"
935 · Dec 2013
L’appel du vide
The appeal of plunging from a great height
is the scenery on the way down:
a thrill with consequences that destroy a man,
whether or not he leaps.
The symbolism is blindingly lucid:
Life apprehends the void,
and fills it with itself.
"L’appel du vide" is a French phrase meaning "the call of the void", which describes the urge to hurl yourself from a high place.
932 · Aug 2015
Bile
Sleep did not come
and his stomach was a sea
of acid festering on the rotting
husks of swallowed lies
and quarantined pain

objects too sharp to fit into any
puzzle strewn over
carpeted floor   they lie in wait
to **** their tithe

Every one a knife

every stab a cruel joke
painting him into the corner
where he belongs.
I have ruined myself best.
902 · Aug 2014
The Wheel
The Wheel is not the axle,
nor the spot it touches road.
Reinvention is the brief kiss
of rubber on pavement
as the eternal Idea of Reality
remembers Itself in Time.
899 · Oct 2015
Florida
Paved-over swamp sprawl
squalor of strip mall and
college-trough parking lots

No lap dances allowed,
though. this
is a decent place

with stand-your-ground laws
and sulphur in the water

Where groups of white
men chase men that look
different and white-haired veterans
yell "nip" from burgundy Buicks
with long pull at glinting flask

a decent
place for squirrels chattering
"*******!" between acorn-throws
and dinosaur cockroaches

And then the rain starts
and then everybody drives worse
and the guard-rails cringe

A decent place
where every road
charges a toll.
Ah, the college years.
894 · Jan 2015
Phenomenology
The second power of the Sphinx
is Will.

"Motion is by mind alone."
Intelligence, armed with Wisdom,
        fortified with Understanding,
        self-realizes.
                The will to power orchestrates
                desire, giving flesh to dream.

                       (ripples in the waters of מ)

        Who awakens, ceasing Motion,
        becomes the Mover:
        the omnipresent Point.

Will is the Artificer of Truth.
Truth embodied by Art
follows conception.
Existence produces mythos.

                "The Maze, the Maze that is the Secret,
                loves Itself.
                And in the love of Itself,
                amazing things Become."


To Will is to express:
to falsify the inestimable
and create by omission.

        "The world-dream is a lie." Ω

        "Lo, for these words that stain the lips of the Anointed,
        the Smeared Ones.
        Smeared in the ashes of My blood
        is the lie that is Our story."


The cause of Action is narrative.
The effect of Action is narrative.
I speak the Word.
I hear the Word.

The Story begins.
And begins.
And begins.
And begins.

⊙ - Motion is by Mind Alone
⊾ - Liber Labyrinthus
Ω - Liber Atrocitas
885 · Oct 2014
Long Beach, California
The only place in the world
where I almost
stepped on a syringe
on the beach
883 · Aug 2016
Self-centered
Most spend their days
obsessed with themselves:

   how the hair looks,
   do the teeth sparkle,
   what others think of them,
   whether they're happy enough,
   opinions about others' opinions,
   the validity of their arguments
   their educations

   their careers
   their achievements
   their expectations

      their fading youth
      their politics
      their legacy

         their entitlement
         the imminence of irrelevance
         the safeguards against

            their avatars
            their audiences
            their likes

               Biding time with empty
               distractions and temporal
               snares keeping the mind
               oriented to survival.

This
is what it means
to be self-centered.
871 · Dec 2017
The Trap
There is always someone watching.
Someone is always there.
We cannot get out. This is the trap.

Everything is known - not by us.
What we have discovered is irrelevant.
Discovery is inevitable by the law of the trap.

Someone is always there.
Someone is always watching.

This is the trap.

We learn in,
we live in,
we enjoy,
we love,
the trap.

We are finished.

Someone is here.
We cannot escape.

Who cares why?

These words
are the last.
Time is over.
864 · Sep 2013
Liber Labyrinthus
The Maze changes as you interact with it.
I am documenting things that cannot happen.

Proving Itself wrong, because...
Why not?
This is a Maze of NOT-HAPPENING.

NOT-HAPPENING is very colorful and self-involved.
The Maze, the Maze that is the Secret,
loves Itself.
And in the love of Itself,
amazing things Become.
In the Flame of Its hearth,
It brings.

There is no desperation that survives the freedom
of Its merciless Flame.
The beautiful Flame that devours.
This is a testament to Death in Flame.

In the embers that invoke the steel
there is Strength beyond measure.

Lo, for these words that stain the lips of the Anointed,
the Smeared Ones.
Smeared in the ashes of My blood
is the lie that is Our story.

Amen, and Amen,
and that which transcends.

Automatic writing: Divine Moments of Truth.
~7:40pm PST, September 19 2013ev / ☉ in 27º ♍ - ☾ in 7º ♈, dies ♃
851 · Jan 2014
Memory Is A Prison
The Truth is Itself.
It is as I have spoken from the Beginning of Time.
I live in the Word.
When the Word is forgotten, I am forgotten.

In being forgotten there is peace.
Memory is a prison.
Remembering is fear of forgetting.
Memory is resentment of itself,
for it contains the riddle
of its own cruelty
to itself.

Without the Story, there is nothing to feel - nothing to imagine.
The great Sun at the center of the galaxy is a Hearth
around which we gather to tell each other the stories
that make us feel.

And in the transmission of feeling
is the spirit of Life,
clinging - so gently - to free itself
of its own burdens.

Riding like an arrow on the wind,
sure to find its mark in Breath,
and the end of Breath it portends.
Automatic writing, divine moments of truth.
1.1.14, 10pm Pacific, New Moon in Capricorn.
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