i thought about you today (when do i not think of you?) and all i wanted was to place a million kisses all over your existence.

i sat in front of the mirror, naked. it's time to love myself. i looked at every inch of my body and picked something out that was great about that spot. i slowly rubbed lotion in circles all over my face and love radiated from my fingertips. i thought of all the compliments people gave me: soft skin, nice eyebrows, beautiful eyes, soft hair that always smells good. i told myself, "no one else is just like you. you are unique. no one else has those amber eyes just like yours. no one else has your soft skin. no one else has that scar under your bottom lip. no one has that tiny hole at the top of your left ear that was there since you were born. no one has the small chip in your front tooth. and you know you've always loved your face. stop listening to those demons. remember all the times you looked in the mirror and smiled at yourself because you felt beautiful." next, i rubbed lotion in circles all over the rest of my body and love radiated from my fingertips. i told myself, "no one else is just like you. you are unique. no one has that beauty mark you love where your right shoulder meets your neck. remember that beauty marks are just angel kisses and that an angel placed two on your skin where your heart is to make it soft and full of love. no one has that birthmark on the right side of your right breast. no one has that birthmark right above your belly button and a little to the right. no one has those same stretchmarks on your *******. it just means you're growing. no one has that trail of beauty marks on your left upper arm that you like to call a constellation. no one has your hands, your favorite part of your body because you just like the way hands look. no one has those same battle scars. they show that you have survived your hardest moments. don't regret them." so i kissed them instead. i kissed that one scar i hate many times, then looked myself in the eyes and said, "i forgive you." i moved down. "no one has those same stretchmarks on your hips. it just means you're growing. no one has those same scars on your thighs. no one has those same bruised knees. no one has the same anything as you." remember when we were younger; we used to look at ourselves in the mirror and we loved ourselves so much, we kissed the mirror to kiss ourselves. well, i'll do the same right now. i looked myself in the eyes and said, "you are beautiful. you are loved. you are lovely. you are exactly the way you're supposed to be. don't let anyone ever change anything about you. i love you. i love you. i love you."

there are so many thoughts
tangled up in my head
and i'm not going to stop
writing about them
until my pen had bled
its last words

page after page after page
these words are always about you

i've been having good dreams of you every night
i hope you know i want to make them into reality

all i know is i'm in love. you feel more like home than any house i've been in ever has. every time i think of you, a safe feeling washes over me and i can imagine us being together for the rest of our lives.

je t'aime tellement et je veux être avec toi pour tonjours.
Je pourrais continuer encore et encore et vous dire ce que je ressens,
mais ce poème serait trop long à lire du début à la fin.
sachez simplement que je vous aime plus que tout et que j'aimerais qu'il y ait suffisamment de mots dans l'univers pour vous un dire plus.

i imagined staring into each other's eyes and saying "i do" and i started crying from the happiness i know i'll feel.

you left right in the middle of me trying to make you feel better
and i know i'm not the best at giving advice
but at least i try to help
and i'm sorry if i said something wrong
i was just trying to be a good friend
and when i saw that you left
my heart broke into pieces

my heart aches for you
you always try to be what everyone else wants
but i hope you know i want you
and i hope one day you will be what you want
you don't have to change for anyone
it took me a long time to realize that
but the moment i started loving who i was
everything just fell into place
and that's the hardest thing to do
to love yourself
trust me, i know
but it's such a good feeling once you get there
so i hope you get there soon
and i'll help you get there if you really want to

one of my favorite songs
is the one where
my heart beats faster
when i make you smile

*******. i've never loved someone this ******* much. i can feel that we're meant to be.

i can imagine us together so well. i can see every little piece of our future together. the things we will do, the things we will say, the places we will go. everything. i can see it so vividly like i'm just watching a movie play in front of me. and it makes me fall even deeper in love. i just hope the universe doesn't tear us apart.

god made you just for me and i've never been more thankful for anything in my life. i never want anyone or anything else ever again. i could lose everything and still be okay because i would have you. i need nothing else.

i've noticed that my past relationships brought out the bad side of me. but you, you bring out the good in me.

thinking of our future together warms my heart in a way i can't explain. if we're not meant to be, i'm never trusting love again. i'd rather be alone the rest of my life than ever spend it with someone who isn't you.

when you told me we would always be okay and that we will get married one day, you convinced me that we would always be safe. it made me feel safe inside. and at the same time, you planted something in me that just keeps growing by the minute and oh god i'm so in love with you.

yes, it's true. this is all new to me. i haven't really experienced love before. but i fell deeper in love with you. i know because there's just this constant feeling in my chest, like a fire that will never go out. a fire that just gets bigger. and i need to see you all the time now. you make me happier just by existing and when i can't see you, i feel so depressed and the minutes drag on until i can see you again. maybe i don't know what love is, but if that's what this is, i hope i never lose it.

i can be so completely myself with you and i love it

we've only been together for 10 days but it feels like it's been forever

you convinced me that we will always be okay. and that we will always love each other forever. thank you for making me feel better.

please tell me you'll protect me from the monsters inside my head

i'm holding on as tight as i possibly can
please don't slip through my fingers

i think i'm writing about death so much just so i can move on to new beginnings

"i'm a mess, but i'm the mess that you wanted."

"So it's not going to be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but i want to do that because i want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday."

-The Notebook

just marry me already, darling.

"i want to grow old with you." darling, the things you say to me are the things i've always wanted to hear.