Spill tears upon my letter
Remember me today?
Memories now salty drops
Crumple it and throw it away?

But pick it up, won't you?
As long as it takes
After your anger quells
To count my mistakes?

While your fingers touch
And your eyes scan
The edges of the letter
It will make me feel better

Is the paper damp?
Dry it in the sun
Read it under a lamp
About when love was young?

In the moon and sun
I have sent tokens
Of undying love
In dreams awoken

Keep one eye
On the road for me
Close them once
And hope for me

Keep them shut
and try to see
What couldn't be
And could have been?

I still remember when
Everything was ours
Except you were mine
And I was yours

I know your heart like I know the woods
Never getting lost but still left unexplored
I know your eyes like I know the moon
I see them every night as the distance grows

I know your thoughts like I know the wind
Where they come from and where they go
Softest breeze upon the tip of my nose
Carries smell of ashes and sometimes rose

I know your love like I know the desert
Without boundary and stretching endless
I know I can get lost but never lose hope
There are oases and roads leading home

I know your mind like I know the rain
The fresh expectant longing sprays
The yearning gets me through the days
I think of you after like petrichor stays

I know your fears like I know my own
Fear of loneliness while thinking alone
Fears clear as crystals and fears undue
I know them well because I fear too

As much as I love snow
I know it has to go
Melt away from me
Vanish into nature's keep
Dwell somewhere deep
Beyond the rockface steep
Also in my timeless sleep
Floating in my dreams

Will it hurt less and less
Every bygone winter
My thoughts are stressed
My heart is splintered
But sometimes I feel
Like the coldest steel
My missing snow
As the flowers grow

In spring water I drink
At the mountain's brink
Sometimes I feel it flow
In newborn streams aglow
Sparkling in nature's mask
Just before the dark
Hidden in evening mist
Escaping my clenching fists

And the wait is long
Time a distance strong
I pine for softness white
In the crisp chilly nights
Wait across the seasons
For unknown reasons
So I take some matches
And give myself to ashes

You are the ship in the desert sand
The linings engraved in my hand
With the fragile trust I used to hold
The fire that burns my naked soul

In that ship I've been to places
Been to places in my head
Hard places with alien faces
In the soft of my own bed

In my purgatorial with myself
You are the last battle I won
The constant war of withdrawal
Which I lost before it had begun

You are the moon in the morning sky
My white orb when the noon is high
My blazing tempest summer fire
My mind's last dying desire

The pain that no longer lingers
The sand slipping through my fingers
Nights spent in wishful thinking
Remembering tears and fitful blinking

But I thank God that you were born
My perfect floating blizzard snow
My poetry given flawless form
Of whom I so selfishly let go

Well now the sky might be sad
We cherish even the fights we have
The droplets are fretful tears of pain
Torn out with an excuse of rain

Outside the road is not wet
But in my heart it is raining
And all the love we have kept
Now like always; won't be failing

The sun is not creeping out yet
And the birds are not singing
Tell me darling have you slept?
Or is even your heart ringing?

Sing to me about your heartache
In a voice with a trembling shake
I know because even I lie awake
I know because even I lie in wait

And lover when the rains go away
Sit and count the falling stars
With me in the cold today
Bathed in the warmth of your heart

I've been to Heaven
and the Earth was right
Heaven is a broken lie
All things must wither and die

Fog and dew on grass
Stew left to boil
And night water mixed
With my homeland soil

His white flowing beard
And slight twinkle in eyes
Tanned arms and firm hands
And a deep, reaching voice

The faintest glow
Somewhat aquiline nose
His weather beaten face
And the strongest of brows

But I've been to heaven
And the Earth was right
Heaven is a broken lie
All things must wither and die

Choked morning with skies bent
With smoke and a sickly stench
And my grandfather's door
Which I didn't open anymore

I couldn't see him wilting
And catch his frame in decay
His cocoa eyes still beaming
As cancer took him away

And wouldn't it be biased
If I say it was untimely
And for such a pure soul
God and nature acted unkindly?

So what had to happen
Has happened and no change
Can be brought forth now
In God's ways so strange

And in the ashes beyond
The trees have taken root
On the windiest of days
Beside unripe fallen fruit

I've been to Heaven
and the Earth is right
Heaven is broken
All things must wither and die

Make that empty heart red
Don't leave it sad and grey
It takes one click you know
To make the rest of my day

Oh lovely woman standing still
In a trance at the window sill
Staring at a grave with deathly thrill

'Why at night do you stand alone?
Staring at rotten flesh and bones
With lifeless shine which since has grown

Ah-He was the one you loved the most
And now wait for his autumn ghost
With silvery tears you held him close'

'No, he was the one who broke my past
the one who burned my yearning heart
the one who carelessly tore me apart.'

We all have dreams
And we all forget them
We all meet people
We can't say we met them

The Love is gone
We lost it again
In shapeless form
You knew me then
I know you still
Like raindrops rushing
To the windowsill
Our love is gushing
Like ****** wounds
It will dry out soon
We wear our pasts
Like secret masks
And talk in flicks
Of necks and wrists
We're finally done
And the love is gone
To be reborn
In shapeless form
To be held in scorn
Forever on and on

Far away, far away
Beneath a wraith of thorns
Not today, not today
I will never forget the scorn

Far below, far below
Under a bouquet of seeds
I must go, I must go
Where mother and son bleed

Not again, not again
The sky will suffer and hate
Far ahead, far ahead
There are ruins lying in wait

Far behind, far behind
Beside corpses twisted in regret
Never again, never again
Should we let the living forget

Sweet flower so far away blossom for me
Shine for me now with intensity
I will come and look at you everyday
My flower blossom for me far away

Flower sway in the wind for me gently
And dance in the rainstorm pleasantly
I will come to you in the afternoon
And look at you in your fullest bloom

When the sky is at its dying blue
And you are fast asleep by the brook
I will take just a petal from you
And keep it in my favourite book

Then under the ocean of stars
With the wolf in its lonely strain
My lovely shining flower afar
I will come and visit you again

'If a writer falls
in love with you
You can never die'
Even if this were true
I will **** you tonight
I will **** you tomorrow
Until I run out of ink
I will **** you
In each and every one
Of my rhyme-less poems
I will write
Of your death
In my blood
When my quill is dry
So when I die
You die with me
And you are dead
Even in immortality

I saw a lovely flower
in the desert sand
Its fragrance carried
across the arid land

And as I pushed
with my last reserve
Toward one gem
so lovingly preserved

My senses still
drawn to the scent
But then how
and where it went

I did not see and
still do not know,
it happened so quick
and so long ago

The flower exquisite
wasn't there anymore
it was not the petals
but the aroma I went for

The magic ends in a moment
Enchantment in an instant
Of tireless rage and passion
When at once the romance
Doesn't need another chance
In sudden moment attraction
Means nothing but a pull
Without the forceful fire full
Of moments heated in charm
Suddenly the love shared is sin
The furious desire from within
Is the piercing yelp of harm
That nothing will ever change
When everything's but the same
There is no magic and no fire
There are just silent hearts tired
And the agony of dying desires

If we were more honest
If we typed our minds
There'd be a lot more comments
And a lot less likes

Today I met a frail old man
A silver beard and golden tan
And he had the happiest smile
Said he left a good life behind

So I went and asked him then
What made him so content within
I asked what we needed most
For joy before becoming ghosts

''All we need is water and food
Some friends and a lover true
Time to think and read and ponder
Little solitude and time to wonder''

But then with a wistful grin
A sort of sadness and longing
He said in a trembling voice
''My boy I think you have a choice'

I only lied and pretended
I am not happy nor contended
It has been now long enough
Some can make do without love''

That night the moon
Ascended reluctantly
To its nocturnal throne
That night I steered
my eyes expectantly
To its corpse cold glow
Under a crown
Rimmed with stars
I saw a specter dance
A faded memory
In a bone white frock
Night wind and grey hair
Soundless voice and empty stare
"Is this just good poetry?
In the moonlit park
Or are these the laments
Of your broken heart?"
She shed a single tear
On the cool of my palm
I said the night fares fine
I cannot hold what isn't mine
She laughed out bitter tears
"Don't hold it for long
Pick up your heart
Cherish what is gone
Bit by bit, piece by piece"
A heart can only break
When someone tries to reach
And plays with it at least

There are no lessons and no morals
There are only stories for us mortals
Every story spun like a spider web
With the same lethal trapping mesh
And closer like an entranced butterfly
We all dive head first into life's fatal lie
And then in the ****** ruse we struggle
Until the lattice puts an end to our troubles
Strangles us in the network God weaved
Death is the life we live; the air we breathe
To roam with madness in this contradiction
Is the mortal soul's only essential addiction
Looking everywhere for a web to draw us in
We forget it is a trap of ruin and placid sin

Maybe someday you'll long like me
And then you will understand my poetry
When all your heart is bleeding out
And then has nothing to weep about

The empty chambers will scream the loudest
The heart which once sang the proudest
Looted and plundered and left with nothing
Nothing but words left for the shutting

In emptiness and longing there is fulfillment
Infinite motion in the abysmal stillness
I've seen men become walking corpses
Seen men jump willfully into losses

And seen men become bankrupt and spent
Watched them distorted, decayed and bent
All this naught for love yes only love
Making hearts bleed for fruits unplucked

Everyone will someday long like me
And then they will understand my poetry
They will hear the noises still unheard
Their hearts will bleed the unspoken words

The happy mask, the happy face
The only one with love and grace
The lonely heart, that empty place
Still had no room for sour distaste

To put up an act they asked of him
To delve in hate and partake in sin
'If you don't dance to our squalid tune;
darkness looms, there's danger soon.'

His soul was pure and spotless clean
He'd never go where they had been
But he couldn't lose, he couldn't win
He was giving up, he was giving in

The curtains then came crashing down
The forewarned pitch dark all around
Those cruel cads, those savage hounds
Ended the broken story of the broken clown

Sometimes I feel like weaving a tale so tragic
A blade which would make even Death nostalgic
Make people stay wide awake through nights
In mute ways of terror and endless fright

Underneath insides of men stapled to the sky
And silence offered to screams as hopes die
A crowded song of panic where they keep
The most vivid of their fears in restless sleep

I ask the winds to make the night cry for me
I ask the shadows to make the light die for me
I ask the branches to crackle and tell a secret
Into ready ears and also tell them to keep it

Drifting in darkness I make them try to touch
The rotten corpses of their own dreams and hopes
I whisper with certainty that they've run of of luck
Tell them that the magic blade cuts to the bone

So in desperation and alarm they finally scream
That merciless secret into nothingness unseen
The secret of their souls in ignorance pretending
Knowing nothing about the night never ending

As my soul danced in farewell
With my life ebbing away
Unto the gaping gates of Hell
With utter shock and dismay
In my last bitter flight
I saw His dreadful scythe
It was the only thing I liked
About the infamous Grim Reaper
And all of Hell's keepers
The only thing with shine
Glinting with dire beauty
That scythe in fading light

My words dissolve on my fingertips
My poetry runs across my palms
Onto your hands held in my grip
Then flows up to the slender skin of your arms

And shivers and dances in a way
I could not have imagined before today
Although this vision I have seen so often
In day dreams and ill timed thoughts
Of this time which cannot be forgotten
Even after my ashes are left to rot

All my dreams seem to lack the lustre
Against the freshness of your eyes
Where my verses are hot and flustered
And fly blushing through the afternoon skies

And replay how I held your hand
And think of how it stopped our time
How we halted the hourglass sand
When you with love held onto mine

I left my poetry dancing on you
When the sun was setting all too quick
Let us meet and be together soon
And make our time unflowing thick.

I am that faint dream you had
The spark of the unlit match
Long ago on a summer afternoon
The scent that leaves too soon

Like the faded dancing flame
Of the early morning light
In frevour and fury untamed
I die with the departing night

The flash flood in the spring river
Needing only a moment to deliver
Lasting pain and unending harm
I leave quick but take the calm

I am the thunder that struck
And burned everything to dust
In an instant I come and go
You know I am fatal though

For the heart that loves; life will always end

In life and death there is no calm ease
But the truest love, can it ever cease?

Glitters among the brightest of stars
It blossoms through the coldest winters
Shines somehow from distances far

Lives on between words never spoken
Sings a song from lips never parted
Thrives on beneath glances never stolen
And hurried looks when it all started

Love is quick and real in dreams we forgot
Love deepest in nightmares of fear and loss
And the most lonely places on the chart
Surviving in the most silent of memories
In the quietest corners of a broken heart

Out of darkness a stiff rule of compassion
The colours suggest that black is perfection
The more you try to remember faces tonight
They slip and fall into the pit of your eyes

Shields and walls are weapons in this world
Trembling hands upon the bloodied hilt
Shivering arms gripping the bolt action rifles
Shaking fingers on triggers wet with sweat

Progress needs the sacrifice of the innocent
This fire needs the fuel of the undeserving
The flood needs the tears of the blameless
Tonight everything we ever won is burning

Wings without feathers over towers of steel
And flowers without petals under metal feet
Now we stand weak at the forest gate
Planning to light up the woods in a blaze

The sins of our past might get burned away
And the tired eyes will finally get rest today
But we forgot that in these vengeful embers
Hearts heavy with guilt only ooze and fester

Run from the smell of the charred bodies
The stench is fingers pointing to blame
Crafted like the war flower made by God
With petals of beauty and thorns of shame