my dreams
they are rekindled nightmares
of my most negative bits of life
they move like thick syrup along a cold plate
drawn out slowly with no resolution in sight
bringing me to the edge of madness
and then
I am awakened with a thud
as if I have fallen from the sky

perhaps a mechanism
or some caring soul slapping me into consciousness
to save me from the real dark stuff

I've experienced the other side in many ways
I've been touched
attacked
threatened
I have also heard the gentle voices of distant souls
allowing me a moment of connection  
I am not quite sure how dreams are intertwined
but I am quite sure that they are

are there shadows
behind that light
are there tears unseen
in pitch of night
do you awaken eager
to face the day
has your heart been taken
or led astray
talk to me
without the smile
set the shadows free
the moon is ours
for just a while
the Sun will always be

they dance on the edge of nearly
unperceived breezes
the sighs of dead men's final breath
that follow me to the edge
of the thickets
many lay at the feet of those who wish to taste death
but not know it
brothers in arms
who cross from the horrors often placed upon them by man
into a swath of light that holds no measure of time or space
or pain
they are free to walk from the remnants that linger in living consciousness
yet remain
tied to the moment of their crossing
the essence of their love for kindred souls

i bought a wall clock while at the beach
with a lighthouse on it
i put a battery inside before finding it a home
it's a bit noisy and i have it laying on one of my
dining room chairs
until a home becomes available
not sure how that will go
since none of my paintings
or other oddities
will voluntarily give up their spot
i really didn't need the clock
but i liked it...so i bought it
logical...yes?
maybe i should shop for a wall extension
i have asked myself 100 times
why i haven't removed the battery
today i turned it over so that the front is facing up
this fixed the noisy part of the problem
by muffling the ticking
in the cushion of the seat
i suppose i could just remove the battery anyway
since i never really use an unhung clock to tell the time of day
but something is keeping me from doing that
something tells me that the clock won't start again
should i remove the battery
and those ships depending on the lighthouse
may be forever lost at sea
but what happens when the battery dies?
i suppose i will find out
if i live that long

it is cold again
drizzling as he enters his building
clutching the 2 bags of groceries
the 3 year old stares from the upstairs
apartment window
wondering why the old man doesn't
play with him anymore
he re-heats and finishes off the coffee
from last night
throws a tv dinner in the microwave
and watches highlights of the games on youtube
since they dropped the local sports from Sling
he checks his bank balance again online
listens to his favorite ghost stories podcast
then wonders why he hasn't planned for
his burial
or cremation
cheaper to dump my ashes in the Atlantic
he decides
he ponders many things but mainly what the future holds for his kids
he does this almost every night
can't understand why they took the vaccine against his pleas...
to get along? Make things easier? Have that card for the cruises?
1 A.M. and a few hits to help him sleep
a final ****
but will hold off the flush until morning
so as to not wake the older woman upstairs
the ghosts are getting closer these days
they scare the **** out of the neighbor's cat
when he comes to visit
he's off the spirit box since October
when they scared the **** out of him
when he saw one go by and call his name
they know it's coming soon
he just wishes they'd let him leave quietly

rendezvous 502
made it through
is this happening to you?

on the stool the Mantis sat
I watched him for a good while
until he turned to face the piano
stretched his incredibly long legs and arms
and began to play
a version of colorblind so intensely beautiful
it brought tears to my shallow eyes
and warmth to my frozen heart
just after the final note echoed down the hallway
he snagged a fly that had fallen
under the hypnotic beauty of his play
he turned his head in that peculiar way they do
and gazed at me
blinked one giant eye and said
'never assume'

I want to live at half speed
to absorb more fully
your beauty
your laughter
your love
to allow the view to settle
the words to sink deep
but alas
I would fall behind you
tomorrow's sunrise would arrive without me
and I would lose you
to time

some dark
some bright
some come to light
during the wee hours of night
some crystal clear
some just out of sight
but all are real and all are right
as I slip into the fearless flight
of the mind's eye

I cannot remember the memories I forgot
I'm sure they are there somewhere
between despair and uncaring
un sharing them
thus
they have diminished
like unfinished furniture
left in the cellar
dwellers of the dark

Monk Taio Kaneta

In everyday life
we sacrifice our need to feel
without even knowing it

they came to check on me
room 222
I had tried to enter room 555 earlier
and the guest reported me to the front desk
who had, in turn called the Sheriff's office
the guest stated that she normally wouldn't have called
but I had such a menacing look that it frightened her
almost a look of...evil
it was 3:33am and the hotel was quiet
they knocked but got no answer
they had the front desk call the room
still no answer
they finally got a pass-key from security
and entered the room to find me passed out on the couch
they checked for a pulse
laughed it off and left me to my dreams
all of this save a vague recollection of being at the bar had left me

and what a dream
I was back in the bar
in the midst of a heated argument over religion, God, evil...
it was close to turning violent when a few cops arrived
they arrested me for drunk and disorderly
but let the other guy slide
I hollered and screamed on the way to the station
even threatened their lives
they just laughed...an evil laugh

I passed out before reaching the station
and in the dream I woke up in my cell
and then immediately and in actuality, awoke in my room
it was 5:55am and I wanted to hit the road by 6am
to get a jump on traffic
I got a quick shower, packed and was at the desk in 20 minutes

The desk agent, after wishing me a safe trip
began to apologize for the incident the previous night
and said it happens all the time
I asked what incident she was referring to
she said 'well, going to the wrong room by mistake'
I advised her she must have me confused with another guest
'oh no' she said...'I'm quite sure...room 222, correct?'
yes...but
'and so unfortunate for the 2 officers who took you to your room
and came back when you were found wandering in the halls trying to get into other guestrooms. Well, just a short time later on their very next call they arrested someone else who grabbed one of their guns and shot both of them. Isn't that awful. I forgot to mention...we dropped the charge for the drink you had just ordered before the officers arrived in the bar...so you have a credit of 6.66 on your card. Come see us again Mr Gates.'
That's Bates...

beyond the shadow of superficial words
lay the soul of a doubted hesitation
a great barrier stands between skimmed thoughts
and the core of the mind
the world is a falsehood of plastic glances
and mirrored sentences

through dismal days and longer nights
and the shielded minds that come and go
i've come to accept with lonely pain
only mine i know

and the voices come at night
from the sink
from the half light
of a half dream
from the phone unanswered
chapstick
echoes from another space
perhaps another time
to show us glimpses
clues
visions of apocalypse
do we wish to play
and what are we willing to sacrifice
roaches in a jar
this is your wake-up call

at the outset of self foundation
i am bewildered into self containment
for nothing i see is me
and what i am now
lay naked and reluctant
to seek the unattainable goal
contentment
which is in itself
confusion

you toy with me
distant friend
fingers through my hair
whispers as you dart about
our secret game will remain
our secret
but I must know if you are child or adult
woman or man
past lover in this or an earlier life
reveal to me the answer my spirit
so that you may walk in my dreams
and open the door to both worlds

I made my way
finally
to Point Pleasant
I crossed the Silver Bridge
and walked the blood soaked fields
where the Battle of Kanawha took place
I walked the streets and absorbed the energy
that hovered like unseen clouds
I approached an older woman walking her dog. She was very sweet and made me think of my Mom, God rest her soul. I knew there would be no harsh words or anger from this gentle lady.
I asked her with a friendly smile if she had a story of the Mothman she might share.
'Not the Mothman, she said...but I do have a story.
One from childhood that I've yet to tell anyone, not even my parents. I was maybe 11 or 12 and walking home after playing and it was getting late. I caught something out of the corner of my eye. When I looked, I saw a large plane losing altitude. It just came closer and closer until it leveled out and passed by very close. So close that I could see the passengers in their seats looking straight ahead, silhouetted against the light behind them. I could see their faces. It went by and then gained altitude again. The strangest thing is that I never heard a sound.
I'm not sure why I told you that story. I always felt that people would think I'm crazy. I suppose I can see that you are truly interested. So there you have it.'

I saw the museum, the ammo bunkers and TNT plant and went back to the hotel. I awoke the next morning to find two odd looking drops of blood on my pillow...still fresh. It startled me and I got up to see if it may have come from my ear. As I headed to the bathroom, I noticed more blood on the foot of the bed. In the bathroom there were 2 spots of fresh blood on the floor. I checked the mirror and found no blood in my ears. No nicks from shaving. No nicks on my arms, shoulders, neck or head. I have no idea whatsoever where that blood originated. And here's what really spooked me. They look like 2 very strange faces.

There were no phone calls from Indrid Cold. No prophecies of planes crashing or bridges collapsing, but I left Point Pleasant, West Virginia with a distinct and clear sense that I had tapped into an energy, peeked behind the curtain of Oz and maybe, just maybe I got their attention.

she looked upon the tree
as i looked upon her
charcoal shades
distant Sun
she filled the space
with her imagination
her emptiness as real as my own
how i wished to fill that space
quell her sadness with my own
but i had promises to keep
false dreams to carry out
i approached to ask she wait for me
so that i might clear my scripted day
and invite her in
but i turned away
and became a shadow neath her distant Sun

the words are few and fleeting
they hide outside my door
my poet's mind retreating
a hollow empty roar
i turn to quiet nights
and share old words with the dead
these lost and passing spirits
whisper kindness in my head
the sleep it comes sporatic
the Sun no longer beams
to light my inner sanctum's eye
to capture poetic dreams
i yield to blank submission
the flickering screen and stare
i feel no sense of mission
the poem tree is bare

Following the release of 'Moving Pictures' in 1981, I saw Rush in concert. I never missed a tour from that point on until they retired in 2015. I took girlfriends, buddies, then my wife and then all 3 of my kids when they were old enough. Neil Peart was to me the greatest drummer of his era as well as one of it's most prolific writers. Never seeking notoriety or acclaim, he remained in the shadows and continued to lead Rush into quiet immortality. Perhaps in death he will attain the accolades he avoided in life. I am devastated to hear of his passing, but happy for him that he will now reunite with his wife and daughter who preceded him. Rest in Peace Neil, and I hope you realized the joy you brought to the millions of fans who knew and will never forget your humility and immense talent. Fans who never met you, but like me, feel they have lost a dear friend.

I had a dream
but this wasn't the typical
awake and forget dream
I remember everything
and as people in the dream were reacting
I knew exactly why
I knew their motives
their plan
It involved a military style evacuation
of a large office building
appeared to be the Middle East
I entered the building and walked through a long corridor
I came to a family of 5 or 6 that were standing at a side exit
afraid to leave. They finally exited and I saw what they feared...
a man who appeared to be American with a rifle about 20 yards ahead on a hill looking at them. He let them leave. I lied to him as I thought he might **** me since I wasn't quite sure who I was in this dream...who's side I was on
It concerned my Grandfather
he had asked me what day I was born
and the alcohol of choice at my birth
I replied that there was no alcohol due to the fact
that my Grandfather died from alcohol poisoning
In fact, my Grandfather died of pneumonia and refused to
take alcohol to help his condition. Why did I lie? How did the lie help?
Instead of killing me, we became friends and took a walk
we came upon a large home with a number of people
sitting on the porch
Two young teenagers, totally out of place began chatting about
an American cd they had purchased
The boy had buzzed blonde hair and a blue eagle tattooed
on his cheek
The female looked very close to his age and chatted non-stop
about her cd
An older female with long dark hair in a long dark dress pulled a rifle from under her side as she was laying on a bench or possibly the ground and pointed it at my friend
Not sure why they let me leave, but I told him I would return...
end of dream
the entire time I knew I was in a dream and reacted as I would, thought as I would and felt as if I was viewing the entire dream through a pair of VR glasses...or was it a dream?

any ideas?

when things slow
the cheetah after a futile chase
lay in the grass and ponder
gathers his breath
I watch the ice form and quiet
the rushing river below
or the Sun
retreat
submit to dusk
it is here I find the corridor