noir: Poems

1.4k · Jan 2019

ink

noir Jan 2019

ink

I feel like Ink

Ink soothes

Ink feels

Ink flows

Ink loves

I’m not ink

I’m so terribly far from being Ink

Are you Ink

Or are you just an actor

Either way

You’re beautiful

Enjoy your Ink’d days

.

<insert static text>

ok this is about ink. whether you believe me or not.

#ink #is #really #nice #smooth #and #beautiful #especially #when #you

1.1k · Oct 2018

relationship-ish

noir Oct 2018

relationship-ish

“Let me tear your heart out”
             “Why?”
“Why not?”
             “I think… I need it”
“Do you really?
Tell me the last time you actually thought about what was good for your heart?”
             “...”
“If you valued your heart so much you wouldn't be with me”
             “But I love you…”
“But I'm going to **** you”
             “You can't **** what can't die”
“I'm learning”
             “You're adorable”
“I know”
             “But did you know that I love you?”
“...”

Indents represent speakers.
I have a bunch of stuff on my Google Drive so I think I'll upload them here :D
Enjoy!

#relationship #love

952 · Oct 2018

umm....

noir Oct 2018

umm....

J ust as you are
U ‘re perfect
L ove is a thing
I feel it for you
A nd I’d love for you to feel it too

I …

L ove isn’t a word I like at all
O ddly enough
V ery strange I know
E erie of me but true

Y ou however
O ddly make me want to yell it at the top of my lungs all day
U have my heart
Do with it as you wish
:)

OwO
I saw someone do the thing with the sentence starts and was like... I gotta try it too
Didn't plan to use it for this ;-;

#julia #i #love #you #but #dont #know #how #feel

803 · Oct 2018

stage 2 (pt 1)

noir Oct 2018

stage 2 (pt 1)

Oh hey
It was a lie
There was never any truth to begin with
I've been living in my head for so long
Nothing was real
I just made it all up
I want to be sad
I want to me mad
I want to say I've been lied to
But that'd be untrue
I have no one to blame but myself
I lied to myself
Told myself I could make something
Told myself I was allowed to breathe
But that's a lie
I still have to die
And remain dead
Goodbye happiness
You were fun to have :)
**** love - TeZaTalks (Love)

I was quite upset when I found out what was happening so I wrote two "angry" poems to help at the time

#**** #love

798 · Dec 2018

beauty

noir Dec 2018

beauty

You
You shall be perfect
You shall be made beauty
Your blood shall be a composition
A composition of perfection
It would be easier if blood came in more colours
But it doesn’t so you will have to do
You shall be made fabulous
Take your place
Face the crowd
And bleed for them
This is your purpose
And you will perform
Lest you die a far more agonizing death
But that would not be beautiful
Wouldn’t you agree?
It’s not the pain that kills
Nor the wounds
But the beauty of the performance
They will dance
They will scream
They will die
And the curtain will fall

i spent 16 minutes listening to League of Legends' Jhin's voice lines and this is the first thing that leaves my fingers XD

#jhin #is #an #artist #and #i #respect #him

659 · Oct 2018

The Fields

noir Oct 2018

The Fields

I tried to be alone
It hurt
I tried being with people
Hurt even more
I remembered
In the fields
Me being alone
But not hurting
Except I wasn't alone
I was in that space with you
And I remember that you smiled
And that it was so incredibly beautiful
But I forgot your name
So I write this letter to the fields
And I have to let you know
I need you
Please.

This was a draft I... kinda just left here. I don't know why....
Enjoy... I guess
:D

#alone

659 · Oct 2018

weird

noir Oct 2018

weird

I'm weird
I know this
I live in my mind
But I don't care to leave
Just like you
The way you walk
And the way you glide
Without a care in the world
You're weird
Like me
So I was thinking
Maybe we could be weird
Together

I don't know. Another relationship poem
Kinda just happened :/

#weird #relationship

569 · Jan 2019

e.n.d

noir Jan 2019

e.n.d

I forgot how to breathe

Left my thoughts in silence

Died to stay afloat

I…

Being with you

Was the best thing to ever happen to me

But it was nothing more than me

Me banging my head against walls

Me bleeding static

This isn’t something that can be made to work

This is the end of me

Of us

<insert static text>

hey, you can't have ex's if you never date.

#what #the #hell #is #static #text #even

550 · Jan 2019

lose yourself

noir Jan 2019

lose yourself

Sink

Sink into me

Breathe me in

Breathe me out

Drink my skin

Love me

Hold me

Die with me

.

<insert static text>

a more desperate version of myself. sadly beautiful to watch

#its #kinda #about #*** #vampire #when #you #squint #at #it

476 · Oct 2018

current

noir Oct 2018

current

It's not like I want to die
But I'm not in the mood to be alive either
It's very annoying
I'm so alone
And cold
I thought things had changed since last year
But it was all a desperate faux
Conjured up by my mind
Making me believe everything was fine
But it was all but fine
Life was miserable
Sad
Lonely
Grey
Boring
And repetitive
And it still is
It's never going to change
No matter what I do
All that I am allowed to do
Is sit there and watch my life descend into nothingness
Powerless to control the flow
Just another fish
Swimming
For dear life
But that life already left
So what's the point in trying still
There is none
Sorry to say
But there really isn't
Goodbye

how i kind of genuinely feel about my life ;-;
i've tried so hard...

#help #butnotreally #sad #cold #andalone

464 · Jan 2019

wings

noir Jan 2019

wings

Wings

So bright

Soaring above everything

Everything that I knew

And everything I didn’t

But those wings have been caught

*******

And eventually

Clipped

I remember how we cried

Asking why

Why this had to be ours

And the only answer we got

Was an echo of madness

I wrote this one a while back (like a week ago). I'm not sure what it was about, but I know I wrote it with like... no sleep so... enjoy!

#i #think #its #about #watching #someone #fail #as #you #have

446 · Jan 2019

single

noir Jan 2019

single

I remember when you had the one wing

<And I wish to forget>

I remember when you tried to fly

<And I feel so far down>

Why did you have to be this way?

<We could have been perfect together>

But you couldn’t love me

<Especially not you>

We were supposed to be free

<But not this way>

So this really is goodbye

<I’m sorry>

Don’t be

.

<insert static text>

another dialogue set, thing. I also wrote this one a while back.

#our #wings #were #made #to #be #broken #and #yet #i

373 · Dec 2018

rouge

noir Dec 2018

rouge

Red
Rage
Love
***
Passion
Pain
Hate
Blood
Fresh blood
Use it as paint
Paint the town
Our love isn’t defined by time
But by a delicious shade of red
Love it
Love me
Bleed for me
Give me your everything

part two of three in the series i am still yet to name

#rouge #is #french #for #red

371 · Jan 2019

nothing

noir Jan 2019

nothing

I made another mask

I got too much blood on the last one

I promise to take better care of this one

<Lies>

To be honest

I’ve forgotten what I look like

Behind my collection

<Is that really such a bad thing?>

I don’t know

You tell me

<I can’t tell you what you are>

I am

Nothing

.

i have no idea who i'm talking to but it feels like my conscience.

#show #me #your #masks #and #ill #you #mine

371 · Oct 2018

the life of a program

noir Oct 2018

the life of a program

I am a program
I am a function
I cannot run without…
I need…
I don’t require maintenance
I am self-sufficient
But I’m lacking in a certain humanity
The kind that makes you feel alive
But this is no problem
Especially since I was designed not to feel
To feel is to be weak
To be weak is not to perform
Not to engage
To be weak is my greatest fear
And also my greatest truth
I am a program
I am a function
I am weak
Help

how i felt last year ;-;

#simulation #program

354 · Dec 2018

noir

noir Dec 2018

noir

Black raindrops
Dyeing everything they touch
In a delicious shade of sadness
Even the roses
Dead
Black
Fading
Drawing life from everything they touch
Recollections of the days we have lost
They’ve all left us
Alone
Cold
We too shall drown
Drown in our raindrops and roses
That’s all we’re given
And it’s all we have
The clouds
Watching
As we stand
Bullet in hand
Will I become the rose
Or will you?

part one of three in a series i´m yet to name
any ideas?

#noir #is #french #for #black

287 · Oct 2018

cinder

noir Oct 2018

cinder

burn
don't think
just burn
light your soul
feel the pain
love the pain
let the warmth consume you

burn
burn everything
burn everyone
don't feel
just let the fire take over

burn
burn the pain
burn the walls that hold you
don't understand
just let your soul burn free
free of the cold that has tried to control you for so long now

burn
burn with me

if only it were this easy to feel how i'd like to feel

#feel #burn

284 · Oct 2018

what you are

noir Oct 2018

what you are

You
You are my pain
Everything that I want
But can’t have

You
You were everything
And you were just in my reach
Or at least I thought you were

You
I still want you
And if you might come around then I’ll still be here
And if not I’ll move on

You
You might not like what you find if you come back
So don’t say I didn’t warn you
That I might break

You
I wish you fortune
I loved you
And now I must let go

found out that things between me and her can't work out
;-;

#love #***** #and #yet #i #want #it #all

275 · Oct 2018

madame

noir Oct 2018

madame

Madame Death
She suits me
But then again,
Who doesn't she suit
Madame Death
Ever so flexible
With me all the time
I'd say you're the only one I can trust
You've been with me for so very long now
You've strangled me a little too tight from time to time
But that I can forgive
Madame Death
Always by my side
I hope you never leave me
And I can't wait to be in your sweet embrace once again
Madame Death
I must say
You look quite lovely tonight
Shall we dance?

...

#dance #tango #death

260 · Oct 2018

faux

noir Oct 2018

faux

A faux body
A faux mind
A faux existence
How terrifyingly sad
But we don’t mind
We take whatever we’re given in stride
But this in itself is a detriment
How unnecessarily sad
But the lack of reality could be fun
It’s a journey for all of us
The Midnight Ride
Unpredictable
Erratic
Thrilling
Draining
Keep your head and appendages tight
Or you’ll lose them rather quickly
But they’re not relevant really
If you’re on The Midnight Ride
Then you’re already dead
The Midnight Ride
You encounter strange things on it
The most discomforting being yourself
But we take this in stride
There’s no stopping on The Midnight Ride
There’s no sleeping on The Midnight Ride
There are no inhibitions on The Midnight Ride
Just come along and have a fun time
Or lose your head… again

another old poem
enjoy!

#ride #limbo

252 · Oct 2018

stage 2 (finale)

noir Oct 2018

stage 2 (finale)

I'm too weak to be alone
I'm too weak to be with others
But this doesn't stop me from tossing myself into fires
And I do so every time with a smile
A ******* smile
I'm too naive for this
I'm going to be drunk
I'm going to get even skinnier
I need to look out for me
I need to stop being so… me
This might make one or two people sad
But I don't care
Being hurt
It ***** so ******* much
I can't smile
I can't cry
I can't do anything
I want to drink
I want to get high
I don't want to live
But most importantly
I don't want love
Or be loved
So please
*******

the second and last poem of anger toward my plight
hurting ***** man ;-;

#**** #love #but #not #really

251 · Oct 2018

Jazz

noir Oct 2018

Jazz

Bathed in red
You're in pain
I can feel it as you dance
You won't let anyone in
Not even me
I've been chasing you for so long now
Getting ever so close
And every time
You glide just out of reach
Every time
Hiding in the colours
The ever-changing colours of your mind
Let me touch you
You need me
And I you
Stop running from our truth
Maybe then you can be free of mind
And we can dance like we used to

made this while listening to a swanky song called:
Pedestrians' Crossing
from the SkullGirls OST

#shall #we #dance

238 · Oct 2018

without you

noir Oct 2018

without you

I can’t live without you
I can't breathe without you
I can't see without you
I can't hear without you
I can’t feel without you
I can't run without you
I can't ride without you
I can't be without you
So please don't leave me

don't leave this good man... or boy
whichever you prefer :)

#plea #stay

238 · Oct 2018

words

noir Oct 2018

words

I can't talk
So I write
It's the only way I can feel...
Alive
It's weird how my words express me
Even without thinking
It would probably be helpful if I could speak this way
That way I could tell you how I feel
...
I'm not sure what this is
I wouldn't really call it a poem
But
I'm sure it's true
It's been true for so long
And I've tried to let you know
But
I love you
And I'd like for you to love me too
But I know that's a lot to ask
So don't
Just be
And that'll be enough for me
Ok?
Bye

My heart feels like mush. I don't like it ;-;
It's making me write the poems.
It's not upsetting but I wish I could speak in this way
Y'know?

#mush #feelings #desires

231 · Oct 2018

things to remember

noir Oct 2018

things to remember

We need to fix my posture
We need to get a mask
We want to get several masks
I want to exercise for at least thirty minutes every day
We need several acceptable clothing pieces
We need to draw at least once a day
We need to at least think about a poem everyday
At most write… several poems
We want to reach Gold in League of Legends
We need to go outside
Get some sunlight
But the sun isn’t going to be around for a while…
So I guess never mind?
I want to become a better animator
I need a part-time job
I need to become a more active friend
Hanging out with the people I consider… friends
I need to raise my *** appeal
I want a girlfriend
We need to be a better person
And most importantly
I must remember to die
Because there is no life without death
That’s about it
Good luck :D

Not that anyone cares but these are my current goals in life
...
kind of

#not #really #*** #poem #but #kind #of #is

222 · Oct 2018

my words

noir Oct 2018

my words

I want to cry
I want to scream
I want to break
I want them all to understand
I'm just a soul
A single pink soul
I'm far from perfect
I don't want to be ******* perfect
Perfection is boring
Uninspiring
Why is it so hard to understand
That I don't want what they do
I want to be me
I want to be free
I also kinda want to die
But we don't talk about that
So please
Don't pull
Leave me be
And maybe
I'll make my way back to you

family issues ;-;

#family #***** #but #we #need #them #usually

205 · Oct 2018

rose

noir Oct 2018

rose

I want to love you
But you make it so hard
With your shield of thorns and brier
But I don’t mind
Even as I bleed
I don’t mind
I’ll still keep trying to get close
Even as you ruin my heart
I’ll get another one
Even as you strangle me
I’ll be without air
Even as you eviscerate me
I’ll still see the rose
The rose you hold so tight
And I’ll wait
In pain
And agony
Until the rose blooms
If that is when you’ll accept my love
I’ll be here
Waiting
And if you are the end of me
I’ll die happy
Knowing I died loving you
But
Through it all
Through the cosmos
Through our fabric
Through it all
I want you to know a single thing
And this one thing you can hold as true
I love you

tbh i don't know where these love poems come from.
they kinda just... happen.

#love #pain #hate #rose

195 · Nov 2018

violet

noir Nov 2018

violet

Let me?
I don’t have any desire to run my systems
Especially my mind
It’s far too tasking
I’m so lonely
No matter how hard I try to be with… anything
I’ve failed
No matter what I do
I can’t escape my pain
I’ve embraced you
Left you to drain my body
Allowed you to do whatever you want with me
And yet
Every
Single
Time
You come back
And stab me
Could you at least embrace me?
I know I’ve said that stabbing me is fine
But it actually hurts regardless
Oh Violet
Dear Violet
Will you save me
One last time
Before I lose my mind
I can’t do this anymore…
No, not any of this
This pain
It’s far too great
It’s like my heart is not allowed to beat
Like the sun is running away from me
Like the tears are drowning me
Violet
Dear Violet
I need you
One last time
Please
Save me

overwhelmed by saddness. drowned in agony. panic attacks. just good old living.

#when #will #the #pain #end

194 · Dec 2018

valentine

noir Dec 2018

valentine

“How’d you find me?”
- “I could never lose you!
Not even if I tried.”
“Ok let me rephrase that
Go away.”
- “No
You need me
Even if you don’t want to admit it.”
“I am broken and empty
There’s nothing for you here.”
- “I don’t need anything
I just need to have you.”
“Please
I don’t want to see you waste your time
Go find something new.”
- “I can set you free
Let me save you.”
“Being in love with me
Doesn’t it seem like a bad idea sometimes?”
- “It does
Sometimes
But that doesn’t matter
You’re too perfect for me to let go.”
“Did I ever tell you
How beautiful you are?”
- “You might have
But it wouldn’t hurt if you said it again.”
“You’re beautiful
And I love you.”
- “And I
Love you.”

it's weird this one. was supposed to be sweet and beautiful but it wound up being a mutual need for someone. not necessarily a bad thing just not really what i intended. hyphen queues second speaker and quotations queue first speaker

#beauty #is #pain #and #i #cant #live #without #it

145 · May 2018

Hello

noir May 2018

Hello

We are alone
The wolves?
Just ignore them
We are all that matter
In this space at least...
I'll show you my mind if you show me yours
Unless you don't want to
Then we'll just sit here
In the cold
Unspoken
Unless you don't want to
Then we'll move
Move to the eternal melody that plays on in our soul
The one we made last December
Unless you don't want to do that
The we will breathe
And be.

My first poem for Hello Poetry. Hope you enjoy. :)

— The End —