1d · 161
Take My Heart

The clock strikes
Confession time in my ink,
where I lay my arms down
with my veins full for you to see
what runs through them.

I admit my mouth is no river -
But you know that
I can think of a hundred ways
To get you closer -
To let my mouth run snakes
through your mind.

But I could think of
A million ways to make you smile,
And I would always much rather
See you happy -
But I choose to fall into your eyes
rather your arms -
As I can't separate my dreams
From my own reality.

Each day in Autumn I fall,
And each winters snap -
I will be bitten by your wit,
Then as Spring rises like the blooms
In your smile,
I will wake to the most beautiful
Of sun rise.

Her heart with mine -
Because I can't pretend
Or give anymore hints
whilst I lay arms down,
Tell me I'm yours
Because like you
I'm scared
To fall
Too.

You bottled your heart
Inside your gut, but then it
Festered and rotted.

Only to catch a
Single drop on my tongue I
Knew you had gone off.

I stopped checking the
Expiry dates, almost like
I grew accustomed.

To knowing I can
Never find a woman, who
Quenches my loves thirst.

3d · 177
Love On Clouds

Walk on the wind and ride -
Take my hand, we can dance
Through the night, we will slide -
Into cracks of earths trance
Finding a cloud to hide -
Beautiful raw romance.

We play with fire
In dark, hoping we both feel
burns on our hearts.

Torch embers fall down,
Descending into dust, we
Get lost in darkness

We got told love was
Foolish, so we both smiled and
Became bigger fools.

I was ready to
take the leap, but I choked on
fear of losing you

6d · 175
The Cure

Between us we are
Divine chemistry - ready
to take a hearts cure.

7d · 176
Cards Of Fate

I once wondered how it truly felt
to meet fate, to see cards that are dealt,
Inside deep down I know,
that matter how long
no matter how I show,
My love is forever
it will expand and grow,
and you will open up
regardless of before,
I need you by my side
in my heart I adore.

Loose lips - loose we sit,
rain drops - love birds kiss
Spilling emotion
accidentally
with rain that drips,
Hands on your cheeks,
Hands on your hips,
We dance in the rain
We share all our pain,
We fall and we trip
We clutch and we slip,
into ones arms grip
Then just like that
all of the love
held in was spilt,
with just one tip.

Nov 10 · 173
Hedgehog - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 10

Little thorn like spikes,
Rustle through my garden leaves
trying to catch bugs.

Ryan Holden Nov 9

Sharing her beauty,
Mother Nature wears flowers
In her sweet green hair

Glowing with wonder
Her aura breaths through the airs
Natural essence.

Unable to fight
Her petals taken away
Replaced by buildings

Yet remains patient
Waiting for a hand to plant
Primordial touch

One tree left standing
Each leaf blowing in the wind
People walk on by

Only to receive
A fur covered paw, wet nosed
Kiss and tenderness

Where memories of
beauty once blossomed, now part
Of yesterday's past

Because nature is
a giver, a mother that
we take for granted.

Collaborative Poem by Myself and the wonderful Donna Jones! Enjoy guys :)
Nov 8 · 154
Bunny - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 8

Pointed ears hop
Across the field, eating grass
Showing fluffy tails.

Nov 8 · 159
What she means to me.
Ryan Holden Nov 8

I feel all of this love I can never reveal,
So I'll spill my soul in my ink -
Just for you to see what you mean to me.

I've told myself -
"What am I supposed to do"
When her eyes are filled with stars -
Her smile butterflies,
nearly knocking me over every
Single time -
And this dream I keep dreaming -
Where we live forever and always
The ages we are now.

We still go around differently
Every single time -
And that's the beauty of it,
You pinch me - I pinch you back,
But you always seem to win.

Only because I'm soft -
I call her "Marshmallow"
I say she has a "Great Wall Of China"
But ha,
Prowess tells me it's only "Berlin".

You see -
she's squishy on the inside
for those times I get
a mere glimpse into her heart -
Inside her soul that shines
So bright.

For she lifted me from the
Deepest depths -
Of my lowest self
Giving me strength
To take her with me
on my journey back up,
Only to flourish
Together - chasing both our dreams
no matter how bizarre,
No matter how far.

But

Every hand I throw
For her to catch and hold,
I chisel through nooks and crannies -
trying to find a weakness,
I make you whole -
You make me complete,
Yet no matter how hard I hit the wall
I can't knock it down,
I have merely
chipped my way into her heart.

But that's why "Berlin" is here,
Right?
To make sure I can't poke around
enough to let her see,
What she means to me.

Nov 6 · 578
Dreamcatchers - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 6

I would not want to
spend, a second away from
you against my chest.

Nov 3 · 269
Foxes - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 3

Pointed nose jumping
between shrubs, glowing orange,
Playing hide and seek.

Nov 3 · 276
Owl - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 3

Tooting swirling eyes
Watching and listening for
a little brown mouse

Nov 3 · 209
Gazelles - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 3

We leapt over the
River, with nothing but a
Spring in our step.

Nov 3 · 219
Fireflies - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 3

Fireflies dance through
The night, lighting outside with
magical aura

Nov 3 · 144
Mother & Cub - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 3

Thick brush brown shoulders
carry her cub up steep slopes
To rest at the top.

Nov 3 · 264
Howling Wolf - Haiku
Ryan Holden Nov 3

Howling fur shivers
Through the snowfall leaning on
A rock at moonlight.

Oct 31 · 242
Perfect Madness - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 31

I think I’m crazy,
I think you are too, which makes
Us perfect madness

Oct 31 · 261
Her Eyes - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 31

Her eyes glisten like
The drops on morning dew grass
Through beams of sunrise

Oct 31 · 166
Love Potion - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 31

Drip your ointment in
My flask, let it bind us both
Together as one.

Oct 27 · 166
Next To Mine - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 27

I have been waiting
For the day my hand will hold
Yours next to my chest

Ryan Holden Oct 25

Tip toe upstairs, creep
Into my bedroom and steal
My heart, thief at night.

Oct 25 · 185
Sands of Time - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 25

Walk through the sands of
Time, taste the desert air and
Drink my soul to live.

Oct 24 · 286
A Poet's Hand
Ryan Holden Oct 24

mark all my words
it's not absurd
to be deterred
from how I flirt,
if you prefer
lady, this stirred?
take this hand - dance with me my pearl,
deep breaths we twirl,
a voice unheard
unspoken birds
loose shoes, loose shirts,
loose dress, loose skirts,
and us poets
know which way - you would have preferred.

Just a quick silly write. Enjoy. 4-4-4-4-4-4-8-4-4-4-4-4-4-8.
Ryan Holden Oct 24

Whistle me a tune
Harmonically syncing
melody with mine.

Play me a chord just
so you can hear what I have
been keeping inside.

Oct 24 · 258
Gateway - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 24

She broke the gateway
to my heart, and let herself
flood all the way in.

Oct 24 · 164
Fragments - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 24

Fragments of your soul
Still make me flutter every
time I think of you.

Oct 21 · 296
Stallions In Dreams
Ryan Holden Oct 21

You don't have to be an eagle -
to see the white stallion in a field
of ponies - nor do I ever feel
like I was the person riding it,
like all of that power was mine -
to command.

But I was George Custer to your
finely edged arrow tips -
I was an easy target and I let myself
get beaten and bruised,
knocked from my mount -
Colliding with every single piece
of stone on the ground.

Cuts, scars, grazes, bruises -
But these stones do break bones,
and these sticks puncture my chest -
Yet this is a mere kiss on the cheek
to the words that cut me so, so deep.

I fell so hard into a bottomless pit
even the ocean hadn't explored
this washed out chest, praying to find
a person who's soul is just as kind.

Now I sit day by day - watching the stallion
in the fields, in all its glory, inside a story,
that I paint inside my proudest dreams -
getting just that little closer to what was,
I look forward to the days approaching -
for the day I get back on my stallion.

And to ride with you - in all of our glory -
inside our story - that we will paint
as we fade into the fields of our dreams.

A quick poem I wrote today. Just about how recent events and past few years has affected my confidence and I feel I can't give my whole self to people. But I see myself getting much more confident recently!
Oct 20 · 320
The Calling
Ryan Holden Oct 20

She was born to be the only
woman and saviour just for me
Taking twenty three years to see,
Me laid alone,
hand near my phone
waiting for her message
in a bottle of notes.

Just praying my dreams
were all that they seem,
As we intertwine,
Love bursts at the seams.

Capturing our souls as we fly
over the humid moonlit sky,
Being able to wave goodbye
at all the other times we tried.

For you to finally be mine -
In heart, and in mind,
With joy, and with time -
Because this ink comes from my soul,
my princess, my life,
Can you still not see
we were destined to rise and shine.

Oct 20 · 203
It's About Time
Ryan Holden Oct 20

Imagine the unimaginable lights -
that shine down upon me,
getting caught in my dreams by an angel,
a saviour, a guardian -
''twas a gift so unforeseen
the equilibrium still shakes me.

Because on this particular night
I was answered by a gentle touch,  
a gentle hand -
to finally become in sync with mine.

it was the day that wind stood still -
she captured it all, in her first breath
just so she could sweep me off my feet,
like tranquility had never seen
The big bad wolf.

Yet - the only thing I wanted
throughout the seasons,
was to capture the first winters snaps
from her nose -
I wanted to kiss her under the mistletoe
and steal her as my Christmas gift.

I want the summer sun to weld us together -
capturing unwritten memories like The heat that stirs between us is molten, bound together to set into stone.

I want our spring days to bloom -
Because the flowers weren't enough
beauty to see me through the season,
so I had to pick you from the fields -
stealing the wild flowers from your eyes.

but most of all,
I need you in those autumn months -
So I could get swept off my feet
only to be picked up by your hand,
Then placed in your heart,
For me to look forward -
to the rest of our days.

Oct 16 · 399
My Sleeve Is Clean
Ryan Holden Oct 16

When the giant sleeps
he lays dormant, never to be heard.

He sleeps like a baby but breaths like a lion through the caves as it echoes.
But to the surprise of those glaring,
waiting for a beast to emerge from
this,
never seen reputation he has built.

'Tis only the gentle touch of his hand
that gave him his second reputation.

A soft one, a push over - but ha, I laugh in the face of unlaughable emotions, kind notions and love potions.

But that's just not me is it...?

I said to the wall in front of me
I needed to pass but,
to my amazement,
I could never even see,
a wall, a mere
mirage to the retinas deception.

But I question why I ever mention,
my thoughts and perceptions
like the worlds in one convention.

Despite being mouth to horse -
I always got stared at,
trampled down and taken for.

Ironically I'd say for granted,
but I'm left stranded, demanded around then commanded - like this sleeve hadn't already,
seen the washing powder one too many times.

All the lost faded faces I left on my brain,
all the sleepless nights,
I thought my help could turn me insane,
But as the day repeats,
I'm thinking... "Not this Again"
Not another sleepless night,
Just waiting the next day.

But at least I know
before I take my final breath,
It was all just a test,
until death,
And I don't live a day,
with a shard of regret.

A poem about me personally. Always getting called a push over or soft, because I live my life as "that guy" wishing everyone a good day and making sure I put a smile on others before myself. I recently sat and assessed people around me, who was bringing me down, who used me, and I cut loose ends. For once I was selfish - yet I still help them despite breaking. Even if I hate - I give kindness. I live with no regrets, and despite my pain I always wear a smile! Live to the fullest, love, laugh and share dreams, that could never be written even in your mind. Enjoy the read!
Ryan Holden Oct 13

Once our lips collided
The ground beneath shook,
Unmeasurable richter scales
Never mind the after shock.

Tension gripped between our fingertips
As our hands clamped tightly shut
The vice grip pulled us closer in,
Pushing us up against one another,
As our hearts beat in one dreamy rythm.

Looking into each other's lost eyes
We looked down at each other's lips,
Seeing the moist on hers I licked my own,
But she caught my tongue on the way back.

Silks shed, losing strings between delicate
Sewing - still sharing our words through touch,
We both inhale sharply as we meet our passion
To fall in between the lights from the moon outside.

Oct 12 · 241
Head Over Heels
Ryan Holden Oct 12

Deep down I know this path was chosen for me, whether I play with cards and deal myself a new deck, or if I decorate my life with glitter.

I know what ever has happened has gone - put behind the curtains and closed for no one to see again.

Then even as the stars burn completely across the sky like drips of lava onto the icy surface, one by one descending into the faded night.

We still search for the sky that once was - but remember the coldest nights in December, were only made for us to hold each other close.

We remembered the only stars that we needed were in each other's eyes the whole time - only to glisten once more.

Knowing I would fight for you until my dying breath - whether you want me too or not, because you've already stole all of the air from my lungs - snatching at the last sharp piece of air I had to offer.

You pulled me into a vortex of uncontrollable emotions - and I fear I will spiral out of control as I don't know what to do.

But oh how I've forgotten what it was like - to be switched off from the irony of social media, and to talk the hours away like we didn't have enough.  

The laughter that's trapped inside our stomach - alongside the excitement of knowing the ins and outs of each other's purest souls.

Knowing I have you to dine, knowing I have you as mine.

knowing our souls are one design, written in horoscope sign.

All of these little things you seem to do, stealing my heart like a crime.

Makes me remember why, I fell the first time.

Oct 12 · 314
Don't Think - Haiku Poem
Ryan Holden Oct 12

I don't want to think
about what could be, I want
you inside my arms.

As each day without
you in my presence I turn
To my minds penance.

hoping you are with
me, before I can even
finish the sentence.

Oct 12 · 250
The Fall - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 12

It's not the fall that
breaks me, it's knowing I have
no arms to catch me.

Oct 12 · 219
If - Haiku
Ryan Holden Oct 12

If I whispered in
your ear, what you want to hear
Would you stay, my dear?

Oct 9 · 265
Fogged Clarity
Ryan Holden Oct 9

So again I made a fool of myself
only to fall at the last hurdle
scraping my heart on the way down.

It's funny really...

Like I should have known how it felt the last time.

ha, I never learn.

What's to say this blistering
heat that burns day by day will kill me?

What's to say I let it just because
I've become accustomed to the pain?

Because if I'm not clear, despite the eagles eye of cupids arrow that was a direct hit, I'm afraid I'm out of arrows.

I was a fool...

I couldn't give myself, to anybody else but you.

So I threw the rest away, I was almost certain, I had finally marked your skin, with the only heart I had to offer.

A story about a man who loves a woman very much but she doesn't believe him.
Ryan Holden Oct 7

Even as I freeze.
I don't drop to my knees,
The cuts from the knives
The self inflicted disease,
The unspoken words
eyes filled with tears,
closed mind,
closed blinds,
closed ears.

But as the waking leaves
curl towards new light,
the blanket opens the horizon
like a million glorious stars,
glistening the dew on the leaves
of the grass over the hill.

His consciousness had awoken,
enlightened yet frightened by the past,
remembering the pain and resent.

But I can't do this just yet
I can't be broken,
I don't want to be hurt anymore
I have nothing to give,
but I have everything to give.

Only in time will I give you my all,
I'll fall, deeper than I've fallen before.

Like the precipice wasn't the problem -
just the sheer drop below, into an ocean
of love potions

To swim with the dolphins, and to rise above the surface of the solitude.

To be able to not drown in a sea of emotion
because your eyes alone are the ocean,
and I was just a wave skipping by.

I've found the trail I want to follow
and even if I tell myself I have nothing
to give,
I know I have every single piece to give
it's just,
I've only just collected the pieces.

So please,
if I give you my all
don't shatter me, it took too long
for me to rebuild myself.

The truth is,
I want to fall deeper than I've ever fallen
I want to dive into your eyes,
to get lost at sea,
to get a call from you,
For you to say you're missing me.

Ryan Holden Oct 2

You broke the last thread
When you told me you didn't
Love me anymore.

All of the woven
Pieces of what got sewed in
Place, just fell apart.

With nothing but loose
Ends to play with, and scissors
To cut all the rest.

Oct 1 · 221
Destiny Sails
Ryan Holden Oct 1

This Mental torture is like a flame on thick ice,
just not enough to melt through my core
yet just enough to leave a mark.

But...

I can't tell myself -
what should this wandering mind do?
Because I keep telling myself,
what will this wandering mind do?

My arms reached around you
sweeping you up like a cave.

But...

My grasp was loose,
as was the howling winds that blew
the air from my sails, plummeting me,
into a nearby whirlpool of blanked out, blocked emotions.

As the course is set and our paths align,
no matter how much paddeling I did. Attempting to steer myself to the safety of the shores but missing it by my fingertips.

I was merely brought back into your arms
despite my previous attempts
to pull you in closer and losing
You to a wrong turn.

Then...

As the second wind hits our sails
we got lost at sea - never to see the shoreline again.

Sep 28 · 216
Kindled Love
Ryan Holden Sep 28

Love is kindled like a fire,
you need to create your spark,
your flame
and then your fire,
then the rest just melts,
into place around it.

Sep 15 · 329
A WW2 Soldier's PTSD
Ryan Holden Sep 15

It was the coldest night
Since this bee brain could remember.
These frozen vignette windows
Reminded me I was still here,
The wind screeched through the
Tiny gap in the slightly open window,
Just enough to make my lights flicker.

I swallowed my whisky on the rocks and choked on my tongue in fear.

The air was sharp, cutting the breath from my lungs. Seeing my own breathe reminded me of the years I'd spent in wilderness.

I was sat with my ink and pen jotting my notes, reflecting my lapse in time,
thinking about what came to be and where I had arrived.

The peaceful yet sambre sound of the weather gave me shivers through my body,
"Somebody just walked over my grave"
I said to myself.

But nothing could beat the fear, nothing would let this heart stay inside my chest,
leaping out onto my page, smearing ink and blood spelling out "I see you".

And just as I looked into my wives makeup mirror, it swallowed the night into a wisp of wonders, soon to be captured once again.

I haven't been on for a while so I thought I'd write something different! Tried to capture an image. Enjoy :)
Sep 6 · 207
Awakening - Rap
Ryan Holden Sep 6

This world is so broke
The earth wrapped in smoke,
So I rapped just to cope
Throw glow to a soul,  
Gave birth to adapt to the rap then I show,
Embrace my worth to grow l, then I sew,
Puffing this smoke blow away the fake hope,
Chasing my dreams til my dreams come home,
Spitting venom every sentence from a tongue of deception,
I question their method of self protection,
Adding dimension to this world I'm cutting tension,
Need a new invention for a cure to this infection,
I'm punching through-a-void, empty noise destroys,
I'm clutching to annoy so sing a-pray-a-boys,
people roun' me acting koi, like false raid on Troy,
actuality boy, shine the pain hide the joy,
so when I look right in the mirror I know I see me,
again, I took flight trial and error my guarantee,
I live daydreams writing schemes to be alone,
wearing baggy jeans no clean t, no phone,
a drone, figurines no family tree tired to roam,
singular road, my brains so fuzzy I'm bout to implode,
I'm the youngen in the runnin out gunnin,
I'm the one that's becoming too cunning,
I see your bluffing but your mind is numbing,
fallen in the system, it's your homecoming,

I didn't edit the lines, grammar doesn't count in rap ;). I decided to preach it through music. This is a verse I'm rapping on a collaboration with 2 American friends. The audio link will be up soon :). Hope you like my rhyme schemes ;)
Sep 4 · 250
Wander - Haiku Poem
Ryan Holden Sep 4

Wander around my
Mind, get lost and find my heart
So I won't forget.

What it felt like to
Lose your own ability
To control yourself

Aug 25 · 693
Her Dreams - Haiku
Ryan Holden Aug 25

Her smile caught my eyes,
Whilst her dreams alone captured
Every piece of me.

Aug 25 · 522
Bees - Haiku
Ryan Holden Aug 25

Yellow and black stripes,
Vibrating ear drums, buzzing
Around my garden.

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