As I **** this cigarette
my life go's up in smoke,
in clouds of gray and white
some day I'll die of stroke.

If only I would quit
this habit that I have,
my lungs would never rot
all cancerous and scabbed.

And though I know this all,
to my love I still return,
for nicotine I crave for nicotine I yearn.

Take this poem to heart,
and let thy cigarette go,
for dieing of lung cancer
is the slowest death I know.

Annoyance from the brains relased toxins I can't control. Dominance over my mind and soul. Hearing through ears on repeat remembering each peice of food on record. Dieing inside the soul from ratched cycles. ADHD, ADHD, ADHD.
I have it do you?

for centuries they have been around in  every city, village and town
they was known under many different names and yet no two
were ever the same.
they are known as the angels of mercy, also te kind hearted souls
who helped the sick , the dieing , the old.
they see aches, pains and suffering every day while family members
may hide or run away.
they share with the sick , stories. pains and tears
and they wipe away their fears.
their faces may be the last faces that the dieing may see
as they bring them comfort in the life to be.
nurses don't work under doctors , they work as equals with them !
they give them meds and hold their hands to let them know they understand.
the nurses are the soldiers on the battlefields who fight the wars
they are the ones who know the score.
when they have to turn a patient on their side so
that they can clean their behinds and making sure
they have no bedsores before they  walk out the door.
they also have times of joy when they see the birth
of a girl or boy, and of when a patient can walk out the door on their own
because of the caring a nurse has shown.
they are the last stop between healing and dieing
and of this there is no denying.
(C) L . RAMS042715

What might the heights of the minds eyes see while the spirit is in motion of the purest emotion of intent and expression of love?


Is it such a state where false has awards and evening gowns picked out for the awards show?

Is it so fake that one might find it difficult to understand real from false?

Or might the fact that when a human being can truly  walk the line of life with grace and demanding ******* while gently caressing the absolutely overwhelming truth that love has ravaged the soul ,

Ravaged this soul,

*****, held, ravaged, run through, righted and scorned in the deepest of waters a soul has yet to express to the world for two thousand years, and all while  the captive ....... Soul,         is critiqued on the devastation wrot in such completeness that is is even to this day savoured as a prized  fetish even unto the sad would self.

Dare I ask simple a question of wondering curious eyes of windowed souls to cast a view into the dew of the greatness of being of truth and grace while respecting the very heart from which such torture pours from?

dare a truth be asked that such a human being be of a dignity in company with the child timid in him self torn, dashed , bruised, named and bolder than the soul that resides in you?

Dare a tasked truth be ever revealed of contemptuous  acts of ***** souls and privacy of ones tiny castles in the  oh so damaged and bitter sands. Of the wombs of mind that we all venture to frontier the very limit of the souls endurance, prestige while being undignified by the raw violence of the act of continued ****, or is a dared truth to harsh a fact for timidness of my self to have swallowed whole as the soul of mine self and mine eyes and mine teeth from which the vengeance did pour a pounding to seek, all to be driving back by the broken and horrorably disfigured child of me that many find more womanly.   For this Ugly Boy of me, this sad sot silly and ***** smaller to the vastness of the fridgidness of ******* through lies and manipulations while taking in the raw ******* of the common God's child , virus this not what we all are the now newly in question not so rarely ***** and sold like ****** in a new church for the dastardly and bastarded ******* that we have come to call complacency of decency?  

Any, how foolish, yes my dear friend , you are indeed a wiser worrier  wafareing wondering wizard of vast skills and frightful  ways and means to tame the beast of such hateful things , so costic as to reach deep into them and quiver their tiny tethers and frail feathers all a mockingly  to the tones and notes left after we vacated the dead crypts of self deprivation and hate as we all found the truth of the emotion as it poured through us when realizing this damaged, torn and frightened child , a man holding the depth of winter killing fields at bay, a man kindly swaying the stars to play a tune so as to grace all who broke his heart a stay of pain for each and every attempted and timidly bold and brazen sway and slanted ****** love or raw truth and powerful motions from which we all find the fancy to ****** the  tool as the goofiest  **** **** as hell fool we all choose to allowed the absolute grace and magesty to ******* Rule our Hearts for even just a fraction of a moment in this prayer of endless time, yet hold with the dared scary and walking naked and alone into the lions den while the wolfs and beasts all gathered their finest clothes, weapons and gold, silver, trinkites and shiny of the shiniest of the things they boldly and brashly slash all with as to command the fear to reside in the human spirit.

As this silly little hill Billy with a **** nice *** *****, were wolf feet and all called out to the proudest and loudest of the tiny little spouts and softly said " what is all you foolish fuss about?"
"Have you lost you most precious toys, only to find victim the Dickson of my sorry and sad state of dieing from the oath and lashing of what you helped  rip from what can only be many peoples and communities and even many families?"

Dare a truth to truth this dare my dearest cud of a bear for a true beast of welcome verosity I be all the while giggling and prancing all about like a happy *** skipping fairy, and of this I most truly rather be for don't you know? , did no one tell you the news?  The horror is scaring but the truth is so amazing, turns out scar gardens are the softest things God has ever created, scar gardens are the hardest element that break far stronger , bold creatures of far fasters tested , cleeted, bust a mother up than most man has ever know to exist.
Scar gardens are the very  spouts from which the truth and grace of the living love of God pours fourth into this majestic ******, animal ,spiritual ,sacred, holy and magnificent place , a place that the very bashing of the flowers that dance you delight even in the pity, plight, laughter , and slight  has done nothing but cast us all from it loving embrace, yet, dear cub of a Billy bad *** nub of a cubbed couger in the final leaps to catch this timid and playful prey of me that you so think you will devour you see,  we, the ones whom truly felt and opened and dare that **** scary *** chance to dance with this devil in the pale moon light have found that they no longer must live in fright, that this very garden is theirs and none to own but to flourish and grow, thrive if you must, but lest get nasty for a real minute, animal to animal ,it ma thrive , sure but it will **** , love ,fight, rise , Smit , right the wrongs that have tortured us far to ******* long and in that moment of exstacy the human race may just finally realize ***, love, caring, kindness and truth of self are the face of God starting through your eyes experiencing all f his loving songs creations and getting ******* goose bumps and he'll yes this Billy Jack goofy *** bad  kat all **** knuckled with bad habits and a lust for loving full ******* spectrum and a lesbian trapped in this fugly *** mans body all crazy *** triple run *** marks the spot moon shine devil of mine were wolf feet and all does truth and whole love the Real Girl and is ,,,,, and most mother ******* who are real and real down with the truth that God is love and loves even your silly but as God loves mine silly *** and the rest of this star studded cast of human **** ups simply attempting to pass and go the **** home at the end of the school bell.


HUA,    I do love the Real artist  you speak of, she knows it, and may just know that I know she is not the one laying **** the silly hill Billy with a rather bad *** wi,,,,,,,, um sorry.     Where were we. Oh yes. Um. Only those who care to let go and allow the truest of flows and are true to self and the love that one finds in the being of anothers breath, thoughts , actions , decisions, and mistakes and graces to right ones self after horrors that tear us and embarrass us, these know the truth ,and my dear friend i love you too, but not like the love i expressed to you in hopes you to feel the love i share to her with out pushing it on her, so that what is rightfully hers to reject or except i gave it all away to all even those whom used it to fuel hate in mine own shape , form and name.  And i have done all of this and a dillion years of pouring stars into the hearts of that goofy *** girl by way of dancing crying and **** it dieing through the very core of you,  yes i got you high, horney, got you off, many times , i gave you memories of sparks you know, i gave you worlds of wonder and ways to flurish and grow, i gave you what you , well many of you , did not even deserve for it was truy meant to be for her, but i felt that the most good it could do and the best love i could show her is i can love all of you and even rock hear heart all the very same ways i moved you , and not loose one silly little drop of the tears in her pain, yet sip them and drip them into her so she may choose to live again, as she has done for me.....do you now see? For I C C I said this goofy eyed going man who has done all this in his true and real names,  For I Love You So.


And didn't even eat my wheaties wink , smile I a not mad at ya, just being me, and some times we all have a tax bit of  werewolfand badger **** in us , sorry to offend, smile in the end, we all just might be ,,,,, sort f friends..

I'm a better man for leavin'
Than just staying here decievin'
Myself into believin'
That we've something left worth fighting for

I couldn't stay here lyin'
Inside I would be dieing
It's best I give up trying
There's nothing here worth fighting for

I still must thank you baby
For showing me to stay'd be
More no instead of maybe
We've nothing left worth fighting for

It's time to get a move on
In the morning I'll be long gone
I guess you lose and I won
We've nothing left worth fighting for

The beauty of an insufficient dieing little thought
was once so strong and had potential
until in the mind web it was caught

The horror of an insufficient dieing little thought
could have stopped the world form war or the battl4e already been fought

Could have changed the world in fact it could have saved your heart
culd have stopped the last of seems from pulling loose, apart

The wonder of an insufficient dieing little thought,
How much it could have changed the world
the amaze it would have brought

The mind boggling distress of an insufficient, dieing thought.
What could have been what should have been
yet it went fling on the spot

Inflamed with thought of what a thought,
ever could have been
it could have been any thought, it could have been a sin

and even thought this thought may have
been one to change the world
it didn't last for long,
and now you must fully accept
the little thought is gone.

Been ******* ova a thousand times
Result of that is trust isnt on my mind
Thats one thing i dont have
So i kno any relationship i start wont last
I try to believe that your not like my past
But after you gave it all its hard to redo that
I have put my heart on the line
Covered my eyes to lies i played blind
Closed my ears to gossip in the streets
Of her cheating and not claiming me
Who would of thought the one you give your soul
Would trade it for what they thought was gold
Make you out to be the fool when time of approach comes
And i loved her so much i believed her how dumb
So now you come in singing a song i have heard
How you would love me forever and my heart you wont hurt
Sorry to be the barrier of bad news
But i must be real and say i dont believe you
Yes i heard you when you said you'd love me on dieing knee
And your promise to never cheat
But your words are oh to familar
I have dejavu with your words this is a bad delima
Trust isnt something i can give easily
As well as my heart my mind cant you see
Take it slow with me i cant go fast
I refuse to get out of us what i did in my past
I be ****** if i get hurt again
Having to hear gossip from my friends
I will not hold the sign of pain any more
Before i go thru it again i will show you the door
I dont want to wait up at night for you to walk in
Or get scared when i see you around another woman
I want to be free of playing the fool
And to be honest i just want to love and be loved without trust issues

What does it mean to me;
She asks as she looks into me.
My reponse, a tied tongue
As she kisses me and relaxes me.
My proverbial tongue does as it's asked

"It's all about perception you see,
And what context it's been used in.
It can mean the endless cycle that is Saṃsāra,
In where karma is responsible.
But rebirth in my eyes
Means something closer to home,
Rebirth isn't about physicaly dieing
It's about letting the old you die
So that a greater, better you is born,
Like in religion when you are born again
You didn't physicaly die but rather
You opened a new set of eyes
And that is what rebirth means to me,
When you let go all of that which holds you back
And the person who held onto all that dies;
You are set free as you are given new life and new eyes that aren't blinded by past actions and experiences."

Thousands of years I have lived
And now I feel like little bacteria
My heart is filled with pores
And people call it ostia

The night's are glazing with pleurobranchia
And thank God I didn't get ******* hemiplegia
Solitary I feel in my animal kingdom
I wish I could do something with my boredom.

How amazing are these euplectellian shrimps
Dieing together imprisoned
Symptoms of true love they show to me
Together up to death they are known to be.

Maybe I am the class imperfecta
But by birth I am a mammalia
I wish we could both be mycorrhiza
And get hallucinated with amanita.

Someday we would make a synapse
And get into the love with mitochondria
And there our nervous system stops
And there the impulse will walk .

No special organelles I have
I'm just 70s ribosome
My heart is incipient
With foldings of mesosome

killimportantmodernlikemrwarbombgotdirtylovecaredirtbeautifullife­secondgodreallightknowtimenakedtearjustworlddieheartdeaddevilhuma­noidvladmomentwanteyesmusiclonelyrespectnewssaygoodwordsburnheave­nbighateairdeathwhiteyearsfreecaught machine guess right blood human night lost town bad burning hair born wild black car eat ate likes democracy planet pope newton make hands forever way live look alive thinking end oh work old living sick sun drive song bed tears cold clean police blind fat spit men pop law tells boring moral religion religious child's it'll soul thoughts intelligent tell cause flesh lips feel dying kiss ****** trying self history course justice pure deep **** try leave broken mountain brain owns child dog universe bleeding going lights insane build makes runs imagine stupidity bright stupid rich children quiet worry bite nothingness monster hell image exist crash millions **** holy terror satan hungry thousands ******* behave sentences tv nation ****** christians believers banality quack leprosy psychopath collider bono let's hard-on million turn shot silly face stone away maybe little **** breath taste tongue dance left pieces single charging red impossible fear fears america money wrong truth sea calm ***** fact cut meaning evil flaw hole laugh matter wasted hope talk new think feast stay questions wearing able head true stars swallow clowns queen art hard getting order floor flame missing felt door simple strong laws politicians tongues faith freedom tree flows gold lot space great happy **** streets sad mention poor species fake watching emptiness falling shame drugs lines rivers idiot late rise goodbye waste faces answers committed atmospheric birth games flood biting creature constant organic street witness stinking press large dressed glowing mass floating crimes morals dinner screaming nonsense deadly velvet laughs guts lord cries compare pressure fame superior oil spiders poetry views starving desires avoid genius web coded rights ape principles ideas possibilities priests creeps american sensitive jews humans reset americans **** genetic dna diapers ******* muslims idiots optional companies ******* ******* christening jihad imbeciles reincarnation ***** who's what's teeth's self-righteous inside jeans gone **** hello goes smile seconds walls does minutes fun lies lick wet things score dreams thirst hold cheeks taking pull forgot secret dust soldier skin finger son pocket long star shine moon fast earth day stand year sleep peace house need spend comes mind help lie reading count fall hips close disappeared thing rude rust stir sky power family crave surely grow angels truly helpless smell hand driving nail thought created suppose believe personal tune feelings sharpened building messages paper worship word lunch force souls future kind times trail path days record open means perfect distant thousand youth write attention figured famous dj fly offering promise gently high excited enter ecstasy endless faded laughing dreaming short boy sure rain ice bond lip loves man humanity genocide wars food water families corrupted fool gun sorrow ghost buildings wonder step suffering roam bones stained knows delicate suicide catastrophe lab completely marry kitchen read secrets circle grave hunger waters inner filled suffocated ending veins crying deeper stopped insignificant slip non throat explodes gloom stare burger drown mirror endangered cup ears bear shirt voices sins saviour birds sorrows treat selling young crack necessary ego historic symbols travel volcano game scratch ******* confuse spill scream melts following *** known mama speed dress smelly highway speeding washed coat drop absolute intelligence mountains speech wheels father wants rip stains ground save pale surrounded swimming final miles motion sing confused sons sprayed wall swallowed road poets nightmare ***** brains commit possible language golden key useless bombs sake raw john changed takes animal replied stories content track locked drives pit soaked honest everybody horrible gates hall worked understand control meat miracles sheer fed message goodnight split commitment claim knife fur folk madness monks tricks holes creatures terminal idea cracks books diamonds smashing stripped pleasures flowers utmost openly grim bare monstrous weaker everlasting drank banks weather raven hang birthday scar gravity ******* ******* sunny snake yeah square serve sewer odd stiff stem shiny knocked noses duck troops chinese necks uncle stark dig service faster prince bold public utterly plane layer seriously powers strike heroes seven disaster slice trash eternally lawns sowed wife issues lasting kings crawls event diamond significance swallows prisoners bleeds russian friendship oceans matters piled dish cell ******* dieing trains milky haunted fuel lumps seats owned pollution systems vanity champagne degree pump command daughters fortunately talent carpet foolish leg carrying virgins hosts lump dangerous license cleaning crucial cells wedding musicians greater genitals china responsibility knot jet weapon rottening slaughtered decent stolen goat absolutely tool limit possessions snakes righteous ozone happens illusion bounce shabby producing tumbled equal neurons insect biscuit notion link staircase fulfilled chewing ordered gadgets transporting craves stunned strategy damage fragments borders insurance jerusalem panda lasted cultural sluggish ****** member coins eyebrows contains buddha pointing clever virus overwhelmed acts solve classical fluid media mcdonalds widow cloths russia reported babys collapsing tom homeless nearest calculated humour ravenous boiled depend reject phones earthquakes discuss **** ****** misconception prodigal social jane nasty eats president sipping propaganda super electricity fathom spilled carrots liver bored behaviour fault similar ethics commercials sells boiling mortgage donald tons directly apes gruesome civil french passers theory construct crashes abnormal pleaded hack clan eaters delusions flaunt gonorrhea vegetarian taxes rockets leash ripping rational pirates embarrassing dolphin nationality shipping ****** thanksgiving goods deals hopefully nephew flounder kennel ****** communists erupting haircut gays ku klux chins justin draped cerebral usa ***** puke ***** fraction neutral warren fornication belive batteries stoning chopped buddhism tolerate enlightened antibiotics dependence mae apocalypse irrational vise pets comedians sympathies somalia crises terrorists breakdowns peppermint biological ***** disobedience ****** vandals hippie fakes mac bombing nosebleed mafia infamously lesbians berg stylish pr dubai burgers production cruise commander embryos presidents clones gluttons chock ******* illegitimate iphone philosophical yucatan refuges celine inclusive spam dion sanitary waddling mullahs nationalism karl ***** remix sensationalism psychopaths techno disney www punks bombay pomme rappers stucked elixirs bjork mutilations allright lagerfeld enormously elton rabies damien hirst capitalists ravers idealism salaries allready freddie zeitgeist dictatorships invoice asmile berlusconi scarified subjectivity riped ozzy snobbish bnp mcdonald we're you'll we'll beethoven's god's men's arseholes queen's feet's elizabeth's putin duck's einstein's poppop puppy's pig's buffett warhead self-satisfied post-human poo-poo 15 2000 fannie pictorial laundries ****** mahmoud caliphate woodworks biebers frites wonderfulmeaninglessness mujahedins fwarhols pseudo-subjectivity anti-document exstraordinary ahmadinejad behavelike muthafukas somethingeverybodyreally yourlanguage crucialenemies sayevil alicense yourselfwear thatyoudon'tlike someheavy reallymeancontrol andindulge swastikasneversayaword oneincludingyourself yourselfagunandplaywithknifes eraseany heartace parkistan bashra iq's entertanier 28000000 märsk mc-kinny möller onepays isharshand muthafuckasdrop representingallthat toyesor ifno hintsaboutyour tosmallviolentgroupsin societylet andbeseenamongsymbols ifasked cremaster nothingofthisworks andstrangereligiousbehaviours automaticgunandpoppop getdrunkand oddpoint friendswithodd spreadrumours notunderstand ofviewspicksome intosomeviolence yourselfintooblivionaboutyour surroundyourself behavioursand disrespectfuland dotcom

Babe I'm slowly dieing inside, even when my heart cries. The only name it calls is yours all through the night. I try and I try all for you but I'm still hiding in disguize. Afraid from hurt lingering on my past. So blind from hatred, pain, agony. I forget you're right beside me. Baby I know you want me to trust you and trust you I do. But sometimes its hard when I've ran for so long. Ashock and astonish she's so perfect more pressious then the rarest of diamonds. She's my all, slowly driving me to the brink of madness only to find out its because my love for you causes my heart such madness.

With a smile the martyr ascends.
Killing for peace.
Dieing for peace.
Thrives for peace.

With a smile the martyr ascends.
Paradise in eyes they die.
Tears in eyes they die.
Twisted ties of us all seem to die.

With a smile the martyr ascends.
As he ascends he lives on.
Everyone mocks the martyr and where he will live on.
Some claim he will not live on.

Martyr martyr I believe you live on.
Your cross can carry you,
Into the caressing arms of your dreams.
Martyr martyr can you take me?
I've wanted to be happy for so long.

With a smile the martyr ascends.
They all laugh.
Shunning him they all laugh.
Mocking his one hit or miss chance to finally find peace they all laugh.

With a smile the martyr ascends.
They all think less of you I am sorry.
They all hate you for your sacrifice I am sorry.
Your god will reward you because it too will be sorry.

Martyr martyr I believe you live on.
Your cross can carry you,
Into the caressing arms of your dreams.
Martyr martyr can you take me?
I've wanted to be happy for so long.

plasticized packaging of ******* another supermarket shelf.
give me another reason why i should give a **** to reason with myslef.
alone and i'm dieing, crippled self. beat and im broken another discarded self.

together we're dreaming, dreaming of dieing, set us free, alone and i'm dieing, liberty.
give in, give up, wasted space. thoughtless protrusion, it isnt me.
giving and taking always mistaking. forgive and forget, I hate myself.

endless illusion, sanity. believing and defying, alone and im crying.
heartless conclusion inflated contusion
lets just breathe.
give it away now, insanity.
bringing it back now, releasing me.
holding my hand now, unity.

In the twilight night
That casts shadows to the day
The cold creeps at the October edges of my single pane windows,
And seeps into my cheaply heated home with newspaper insulation
It catches my toes, and walks up my white hands and grabs my face and nose
The cold grasps firm and goes deep

And in the chilly dieing light  
I found a picture of you laughing, tucked into a book I was going to give you
Suddenly I am dragged back to the moment when I fell in love with your soft native eyes.
And your freckled cheeks drawn in an eternal smile
I loved your black hair and your carefree way

The cold is not cold enough for this,
I open a window and the back door.
I finish my drink to the whiskey sharp bottom,
I cast off my blanket and sit as wind comes in.
The cold is not yet cold enough

I add ice and ***** to my glass
Hoping for Russian absolution
But in the freezing flesh core of my sad meat suit,
As the temperature drops to negative numbers  
My stupid heart still beats for you
And the cold is not cold enough for this.

Sunrises are beautiful
a beautiful beginning of a new day
but sunsets are even better
and it shows that you have survived the entire day
without dieing

In my cloudy eyes,
blurred visions of sadness,
storms rage without fear.
In this furry, tears
spur out of the madness
and die.

Those, they who see it all
lost in the real,
struggling,
enlighten us to the
hard knock truths of life
while everyone else stumbles
in and out of fairytale dreams and illusions
of which have no meaning.

Dieing before their time
storms continue to rage
not only in my eyes
but in my heart.
Their words
etched into eternity
forever echoing
reassuring that
they don't die silent.

my eyes they do wonder
more than you will ever know
will they always
tend to find themeselves in thoughts unpredicted
by even myself
who could probe so deep, mingle so lightly
with touches and sighs not meant to come out they way they do
but even more
so much more
then what ill ever draw with my finger
love dipped sand gripped
oh autumn summer fall
gray September
red winter
sepia summer
under leaves and leaves

ocean

the ocean never changed
where I felt touch as a woman
released my first sighs as a woman
doing bad so bad
under things that were so beautiful

that was so beautiful

I mix and walk back
I must be a woman
to walk this way

and to look into all of your eyes
and feel nothing
and then feel everything

alcohol

white fresh and tastes like spring
under the imagination of so many things
I can go on forever

you know
about cups lovers creeps echos and black *******
that helps me flow

and I still bend to weak minds and words
I still bend to eyes fleeting destruction
to eyes who try to lie about everything
make believe they are something
dieing inside from nothing
bleeding tape around mouths with tongues that are too narrow
for proper speech

i still bend to beauty and love for the sake of -- love
or anything of such kind
meanings lost mixed and revealed through each other
with such discreet difference in between
and I feel the difference
and the contrast only makes me fall deeper into things that i don't know

once discovered

I grab my scarf wrap it around my neck with a thin cancer mutation in between my fingers
select my watch drape it around my wrist
put all belongings where they belong
and check out into the next hotel of
malicious life tones

Time to meet the family
At least, that's what I heard
But, she asked me when the game was on
So, I didn't catch a word

We'd be heading out a week from now
Back where it all began
To meet the wife's whole family
every woman, every man

When she said she was from the hills
I didn't ask her where
But, once he started on our way
I was always looking out for bear

They lived way up in the wooded parts
Off the road, you couldn't see
I didn't see just where they were
But, I felt them watching me

We pulled on up and there they were
They made the Clampett clan look good
Eighteen folks all standing there
and two were chewing wood

The one's I thought to be her folks
Were her sister and a dog
The one that cozied up to me
Had a leash walking a hog

There was hugging and some kissing
Lots of tangled beards and hair
Then they stood and looked at me
With that mountain kind of stare

you know the one, deliverance like
where you wonder flee or flight
It was just then that I wondered
If I'd make it through the night

Her ma came up and spun me round
slapped my ***, and said "he'll do"
I wasn't sure if that was good
And I would end up in a stew

A bearded one came over,
shook my hand, and said his name was Clem
He said that mama liked me
Now, I was one of them

they was fixing to go hunting
Which was something new to me
The last time I went hunting
I shot a canoe and a tree

They said that they were hunting
The most elusive mountain prey
I was gonna hunt for ginseng
And if we found some it would pay

First, though, time to have some drinks
Eat some greasy, stinky meal
I think it was a possum
But, it might have been an eel

They said we'd get a good night's sleep
And they started howling at the moon
Time to hit the sack they said
Hunting time is coming soon

My Appalachian in-laws
Made my sphincter close up tight
They had 14 teeth between them
And I don't think one of them could write

We hit the trail next morning
It felt like miles up that hill
I thought that I was dieing
And I hadn't left a will

A sound was heard, a gentle coo
And we was running, in our boots
Clem was out in front of us
And he'd discovered ginseng roots

I picked them up, all scraggly
Like a parsnip,  dried and dead
When a holler came from brother Boo
A monster known as Red

His beard was black as coal could be
His eyes looked at each other
They called him Red not for his hair
Just 'cause he liked the color

They filled the bags with what they found
And back down the hill they went
I thought that this was insanely mad
And then Clem got a scent

Someone else was on this hill
Out hunting Appalachian gold
That's not what I would call it
But, I just call things as I'm told

We found the truck and sped away
To get paid for the days find
We had to make sure all were there
And that we left no one behind

The gun shop and the bar and grill
Was where we would get paid
Thirteen hundred bucks a pound
Almost three grand had we made

We went back with the cash in hand
Howling at whatever we saw
I guess that I'm now one of them
An Appalachian outlaw in-law

days like these I wish to fashion the sun into a dress and wear it
tuck my eyes under the water and breathe,
I can pretend to do these things
I hold the trees in my palms and watch my skin turn into leaves
I am the dirt and I am more than clean
I am black
I am white
I am red
I am wise
and I am green

mislead and content
driven, far fetched, and bent
I remember that night when whatever we had left, we spent
but it didn't matter that we didn't have money to go out
because we went out to the woods and we set up our tent
we forgot about our superficial laments and immersed in natures scent

I don't need the buildings or the cement
**** the bills and **** the rent
and **** all that technology that they continuously invent
it makes us forget what we are

I would like to find ears who will listen to me as I vent
about a catastrophic race who has forgotten its blood
who don't let their children go out and play in the mud
who see no beauty in the flowers bud
children who have been completely devoured
by this consuming technological flood

I close my eyes and I hear nature whisper its calm lines to me
she tells me that she is sad and that more of us should rise to find
a solution to this anarchy
that by the day, lives that live within her are becoming endangered species
the dieing trees next to me nod their heads and agree

she reminds me of the starving children
the dieing men
and the tortured women
my hands feel more empty than before
as I feel helpless

but she said, we can all do one thing
love true life, find its answers and upon finding these answers the
world herself becomes a better place
and  unlike anything else that is ageless
she screams love, accept, and appreciate every race
every religion and try to see the innocence in every face
reach out humankind, hands together tangled in a embrace
smile and throw your hands into your universes infinite space
and remember that it is not a specific country
but the earth itself that is your birthplace

remember that it is not only the offspring of your mother and father
but every human is a brother or a sister
realize the horrible truths of our society, open your minds up
and learn how to accept and be braver
only by accepting these things that seep between government lines
can we manifest energies that will expose them
so that more people believe
so that more people rise
and more people see
I dare you, to not be deceived; life says
cause ignorance sleeps in bliss
and though this truth may make you grieve
my child it is better to be wise
then to be
naive

so come with me, life says; take my hand
don't pack your bags
spread your wings and fly to the true homeland
swim in my oceans naked and dig your body into my sand
feel your heart sing
and your soul expand
now you are truly bathing

time comes slower now when it comes to aging
and here people take pride in their wrinkles and gray hair
in their creases they hold many years of happiness and despair
wisdom, and many moments simply loving the raging air
words and silence become one
remember always that the most beautiful things are wordless
and this life is full of scriptures that you cannot see
but that you can feel with every pore on your body
your third eye has opened and your 6th sense has finally came to be
now intuitive, you see beyond what we knew to be beauty
let go of that hardship I beg you
let go of that worry
let go of the angry
let go of that army
dust off that ashy debris

and come into this world gently and calmly

.

The unseen is so intangible to humanity that it screams Hersey in defense of limited carnal senses. Even if the womb could inhabit scientists in pre-birth form they could merely predict that the umbilical cord was the result of the big bang which was brought on by flatulence before the great earthquake of indigestion. The true miracle of birth is the unseen…how in the darkness of gestation a blind love is reflected through a heartbeat that is perceived only physiologically. They could never fathom the deeper water of love that a man has with a women! Conversely we are not immune to this fallibility within the new embryonic process called mother earth and its new limited senses that perceive love as tangible. Love is not a feeling like an umbilical cord or is it a marriage that brings beauty and personal happiness on earth. Love is bigger than the thick and thin of this imperfect dieing world! Marriage is the umbilical cord to a true love that is again unseen and reflected in the heartbeat of the Cross which eclipses all Physiological and cognitive impulses. Love never fades………………….

Inside my tears are falling,
Quenching the fire of my will.
My emotions inside are a turmoil lake,
And only when I'm dieing will they still.

My sorrow fills my thoughts,
Making sadness wherever I see.
Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But only my words will hurt me.

Thank you for another day the breath I take I'm blessed to say. Thank you for my strength I owe it all to you. Thank you for the pain it really made me who. Thank you for the rain it really led me to.Thank you for the vision the wisdom for granting wishes. Thank you for the heat the stress the symptoms my God cures conditions. Thank you for the grace covering my mistakes no longer have to cover my face. Jesus Thank you for dieing in my place

Thank you for waking me for making me. Thank you for the strife thank you for the fight. Thank you for the trials by light. Thank you for the strength in the night thank you for never leaving my side time to decide. Time likes to divide. Thank you for the last 29 years of my life I hope I'm living right

Thank you for another day the breath I take I'm blessed to say. Thank you for my strength I owe it all to you. Thank you for the pain it really made me who. Thank you for the rain it really led me to.Thank you for the vision the wisdom for granting wishes. Thank you for the heat the stress the symptoms my God cures conditions. Thank you for the grace covering my mistakes no longer have to cover my face. Jesus Thank you for dieing in my place

Thank you on Thanksgiving what a short giving. Thankful for food or just for living. How about Thank you for the control of my limbs. Thank you for my family and friends thank you for the scars they remind me to mend. Thank you for the time that I have, for my mom and my dad for sight when I'm sad grip when I grab patience when I'm mad. Thank you for the grace that covers my mistakes thank you Jesus for dieing in my place

Thank you for another day the breath I take I'm blessed to say. Thank you for my strength I owe it all to you. Thank you for the pain it really made me who. Thank you for the rain it really led me to.Thank you for the vision the wisdom for granting wishes. Thank you for the heat the stress the symptoms my God cures conditions. Thank you for the grace covering my mistakes no longer have to cover my face. Thank you for dieing in my place

pinched lips, tight with emotion,
teeth grining back and forth.. anger set in motion...

trying not to punch the keys while i type this poem
wondering why i cant leave this love alone?

my heart being on my sleeve is a flawed and broken
so i write this peom.. so my HURT is spoken....

love the light but never lightly love,
love thats light, lightly is called love...

DO NOT GO QUIET INTO THAT GENTLE NIGHT....
RAAAGE RAGE AGAINST THE DIEING OF THE LIGHT!!!!!

rage against the love in flight,
rage agsint love in plight

rage
rage
rage

and at last... perhaps... just once..
my heart will fit this cage.

FIN

Everyone is always

Saying

What a

Beutiful

Sunset

What a

Magnificent

Beutiful

Sight

But don't forget

That monsters can

Be beutiful

That war can

Be magnificent

And yet a sunset

It is still

Pretty

Pleasing

Romantic

Idealic

Such a soft sight

Such a little snippet of

Gentle

Kind

And it is

All those beutiful

Things

But it is also

Death

It is also

Darkness

A darkness on that light

For, why treat the

Herald

Of a

Tyrant

Like a

Queen

But

And yet

We make an exception

(The humans we are)

An exception for this

Beutiful

Magnificent sight

As it bleeds

As it cries

Tears of

Cloud

Just another

Casualtie

Of night

Pinks like watered

Blood

Oranges like

Funeral pieces

Such morbid

Similies

Such violent

Metaphors

For such a

Beutiful

Magnificent

Terrible

Sight.

Things

Cold

Dark

Lonely

Black

Dieing

Dieing

Dieing

Hope.

The final words

Of a poet

His

Rasping

Breaths

Hacking out

Words

Words like blood splattered flowers

What does he say in those

Final

Moments

What

Beutiful

Violent

Things?

The answer

Why, it just behind that

Dark

Dark

Horizon.

Humans get really crazy,
When they are are the polar opposite of lazy.
Climbing up a mountain, jumping from the sky,
This is a completely different kind of high.

Bungie jumping, shark diving,
Any activity that ends in dieing.
They go out of the box, while sane people stay in,
To get that dose of adrenaline.

im alone
all alone
my razor it becomes my friend
crying  perfect lines
before I realise
its to late
no one will now
no one will care
no one loves me
im lost
a waist of space
from suicide attempts  
why couldn't they have killed me
the perfect 7 year old
beating they don't matter I deserved it
right...
one cut two
some one please
ask if im
okay
do I need a friend
im really falling and got no one to
call my friend
no one wont to talk to the
sad
lost
misunderstood
emo girl

Where is my mind?
It's out  in the sea.
Between
Break up
Old love's
And my first Real uncle heading downstream.
My mind is one of a gemini.
It's hard not to loss my mind
Always torn in two.

The coral Is dieing.
Just like the love inside of me.
He took care of me.
And I cant ever pay him back u see.
Because what he gave me was a family.
We agreed to be friends.
And I hope that will never end.
He is part of my trinity.
He truly was
And always will be
My knight and shining armor
Because he rescued me
I wIll love him forever
That'll never be lost out in sea
But my coral is dieing.
But he will be my forever and always.

I'm stuck in the deep
I don't know what to say
about this old flame.
It's been 10 years
And he act like nothing has changed.
Yes he makes me feel ablazzed.
But I have came along way.
I want it to be.
But first I have to see.
What my life is going to be.
So for now
I'll wait and see.
If he can catch me
Out in the sea.

The current has came.
He is on his way to a better place.
Where he will say hey.
To the ones who lost there lives
Before his time.
he is my grandpa's brother.
But never met him or my uncles.
After my mom's death we all left.
Came down to Florida.
Where we stayed with this man.
Who I called uncle soon after.
So I raise a beer.
In cheer.
For my first real uncle.
Who was there.
We all love you.
And will be here to hold your hand.
When you go.
Please say hello
To my mother
Hope the current takes you to a better place.
So you can let go.
Of all you pat pain.

This is the stuff on my gemini mind.
Breakups are hard.
Old love's are too.
And death thrown in to the mix.
Hope I find a way out before
It's to late.
I'm just a little scared.
Don't want to loss a friend.
Or a family member.
One has to go I know.
But it's hard to let go.
And to that old fling.
Don't leave me on the swing.
If it's not meant to be.
I still want u to be.
A friend who I can.
Run to.

Two days later, he opens his eyes.
Bright sunlight, some blinding enemy,
Like heat waves upon scalding sand.
Two seconds later, he closes his eyes.
How did it begin?
And where, for that matter,
Did his dignity run off to?
He rolls out of bed,
Clutching his greasy head.

It was the annual banquet
For the Pure-of-Heart-but-Poor-of-Soul’s
Club; They dined, they danced, and
Someone grabbed his sweaty hand,
                                             and…

He leans against a round-topped refrigerator,
Stained a putrid brown, which collects
Take-out boxes from all over town.
He ought to find a chemical,
Some bleach-magic in a bottle. He could
Use steel wool, or a sponge,
Make it into a worthy possession again,
But still,
He won’t. And he probably never will.

A metal cap is flung across the room,
Landing soft upon a soil on the floor.
The beer tastes
Like aspirin and the ***** General Electric.
Waste not, want not,
He’d always say.
And so he sipped, and did for
The rest of the day.
Waste not, want not,
Wasting away.

What color was her dress?
Did she dress,
In that purple dress,
To seek? To impress?
Anyway, he thought,
Anyway you stare,
Is alright. Not okay, but did he care?
And he just might marry her red hair,
But only if her crooked grin
Would run away with him.
She’d never seen a black tie before,
And neither had he,
Until he found one on the floor.
“I see you’ve joined our Club,”
She said, stubbing a cigarette on her shoe.
“Just passing through, fair-headed,
Taffeta lady. But it’s sure nice
Seeing you."

A dripping air conditioner
Barely clings to the window ledge,
As if a seven-story fall from
The pathetic high-rise were
No big deal at all.
And it pours its sour, frigid air
To the dark apartment there,
And another ***** shakes itself loose,
As he turns up Scarlett O’Hara
On the evening news.
“I’ll bet she’s a princess,” he said
To an audience of burn-holes and broom handles,
“The woman of somebody’s dreams…”
And glancing at the dieing machine, he added,
“Well, since you are my only friend,
What do you think?”

She kissed him over an open pizza-box delight.
He was probably crazy,
But not as crazy as she that night.
Crazy will do as crazy often does,
Which explains a lot,
If you don’t think about it much.
He should have known better
Than to trust a pair of cloudy eyes,
Or the bird’s nest of a mess sitting
Confidently on her head,
Like some wilted rose painted red.
Some devil’s right-hand angel
Was kind enough to carry
Him home that night,
Staggering drunk, robbed blind.
And crazy never changes,
So the Taffeta lady will remain
Counting all his money in her room
In the asylum for the criminally insane.



Sometimes you live, other times you die;
Two days later, he opens his eyes.