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Ali Harati Apr 25
Looking towards the mountains,
In the ceaseless hike of living,
Is it us who's taking step,
Or are we self deceiving?

The raging winds in sorrowful snow,
And fear shaking beneath,
Are we feeling it all,
Or are we sightseeing?

The high mountain summit,
Where we look to feel alive,
Is it the sight that we need,
Or what lays underneath it?

To play upon our burden,
To act as if it's myth,
To make us be the things that
we don't see ourselves being.

We need to look deeper,
We need to reach further,
We need to embrace it,
we need it, to receive it.

Or if we just ignore it,
Cover it up with being,
We lose sight of our self,
and sight of our beginning.

Lets hope the lone hiker,
Looking towards the mountains,
Can reach the deepest heights,
And see what needs seeing;

And what there is to be seen,
Gives him a farther sight.
Lets hope he keeps seeing,
Lets hope he keeps reaching.
The path towards self-understanding and acceptance is not an easy one.
I remember daydreaming so much in middle school because I was afraid to make new friends. I wrote letters to this turquoise eyed beautiful girl sitting right next to me because I was in love with her.
Everyone thought we were dating so they called me Brandi the lesbian in the rumors.
Then in the eighth grade my best friend Kalie made me slow dance with who would be my first boyfriend to defend my honor to the public. The popular kids love him and I being together. I knew it wouldn't last long because he spoke of science and I spoke of faith. He and I would get into fights all of the time. I broke up with him during Christmas break.
Kalie died while I just started high school. I thought I had no one who would understand me ever again. Then I met the Girl with Green Eyes I fell for her as I did Kalie. The Girl with Green Eyes and I made up as best friends I wrote all that out of anger because I adjusting to my meds.
Then my ex-girlfriend I made up as girlfriends again with no one watching us as they did in SGA. I know what she did to me in the past was messed up but I love her despite her many flaws. I know she is vocal in many aspects but she is the political strength of our relationship. We are going to start slow because I am healing from all ******* that went down last year well the past 4 years. I am the emotional support, the strong friend, the nerd, the ******, the sensitive and the limitless heart. I plan being a therapist one day but after I get my Associates in the Arts. I plan writing music, singing and becoming a local artist for now. I will continue my poetry and work on self editing my novel.
benedict Jan 12
hell, i'm doing so well
getting sleep
eating vegetables
running on the treadmill
finishing my homework
staying off my phone

so why do i feel kind of numb?
why do i dream of nothing and
why does this food have no taste and
why can't i catch my breath and
why haven't i talked to my friends in days and
why do i want someone to punch me

i feel so sick
energy drinks every morning
throwing up every night
looking at my figure in the mirror
blisters on my hands
words caught in my throat
tw: ed & sh
um anyways
Valya Sep 2021
You see me now don't you?
You see a girl who's struggling harder than ever
But you also see a girl who's the strongest she's ever been
You see a girl who has worked on herself
And is still working
Getting rid of bad habits
And replacing them with new, better ones
A girl who can set boundaries
A girl who can say no
A girl who may be struggling with death
But is still choosing to fight her hardest to stay
You didn't think I could change
But here I am
The girl of your dreams slowly emerging
Flawed, but willing to invest in herself
It's amazing isn't it?
How you never thought I could change
But here I am blowing your mind
I'm getting rid of so many bad habits and even though it was already happening it's been happening even quicker recently and I'm so proud of myself even though I still have a lot of work to do this is such a huge leap
Celestial Jul 2021
I could miss you,
If I had the feelings you stole.
When I was whole.

Ditched and strung about,
You left me without!
Now all I have is the anger.

The distain, stress, FURY.
I'd run from the fire,
But now I have desire.

Right, I still have that.
THAT! The feeling of longing... remembrance.

Can it fade?
What once was so hot,
The feelings caught.

Yes, as an abyss,
Never-ending with out bliss.
My out side is charred.

Inside I feel it now.
Growing and expanding,
A cold dulling what was commanding.

What can I be!?
I cant see..
Good-bye me, I'll miss you.
Feeling your shell around
SUPA SESH May 2021
Slipped up but it's not what you think,
Feels like a life time since I've touched drugs or drink,
Years prior have me feeling empty from all that was given,
Routine played out, last year drunk this year driven
Nic Mac Mar 2021
It’s where I want to be,
That place I cannot reach.
And if I dare to look ahead,
it will taunt me, Warn me.
Go back a step instead!

“I’ll never get there!”
My vision starts to blur.
Reaching out with fuzzy hands,
To hold something steadier than my nerve.

But dense is the air and the fear, that wears me like a cloak.
They picked me up like this, they saw that I had broke.
How to step forward, when these shoulders are my home?
Looking back is easier, if you kid yourself you’ve grown.
Zane Feb 2021
often i am plagued with sudden perspective shifts into realisations of my poor behaviour
in this change I drearily daydream of a sudden departure from all those who surround me
off on a personal journey of self betterment
a transformation into a far more admirable human
far and away from the impulsivity and naïvete of my current existence
for i have always felt subtle change shocks none.

how precisely this metamorphosis occurs I haven't yet learnt
yet the final goalpost is clear
I return to collective awe from my friends
the weight of my poor eating habits gone
the doubt that choked me replaced with confidence and self assurance
and a burning heart ready to set the world on fire with its unapologetic love.

but as I rub my eyes and awaken from this vision
comes the bleak fact of where I am.
the starting point I always have knelt at, ready to bolt out of the gates
sans the knowledge of how to arrive at the end
perhaps this time I'll shed my gung-** nature first
and i will choose to carefully walk to my destination.
Kiyoshi Nov 2020
Why shall we out ourselves in a depth we cant get out of?
Why shall we suffer in order to achieve happiness we long to hold.
Why is there pain?
Why is there the deep abyss of darkness?
We blindly follow our hearts and in the end we decay like dandelion flowing through the wind.
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