You don't know what it's like
To be violated
To be held against your will
And felt up
And leave bruises
By someone you trusted
By someone you thought cared about you

You don't know what it's like to be used just for your body
By someone you thought cared for more than just nudes
By someone who told you were cute and pretty

You don't know what it's like to tell the person who violated you
What they did to you
And how it made you feel

You don't know what it's like to receive a fake apology
One only to get you to shut up
But as you're telling him your point of view
And as he's pretending to apologize
You could just feel all the "I don't cares" and "will you shut up nows"

You don't know what its like to attempt to leave an uncomfortable situation
Only to be pulled back by the handle on your backpack
Unaware of what is going on
You thought you were leaving

You don't know what it's like to be held up against the body
Of a strong, tall male
Unable to push him away
Unable to squirm out of the situation

You don't know what it's like to be barely able to breathe
Because your face is pressed right up against his side

But of course you knew he was strong
He played hockey and baseball
But you didn't know he was that strong

You don't know what it's like to be violated by someone you thought you could trust, or thought they could protect you.

Let's not mention how you don't know what it's like
To be sitting in class, sharing your homework with another boy
Only to feel his hand on your leg

You don't know what it's like to sit in a room full of students
And have no one notice what is happening
And you've shot a look that says don't do it
Yet he takes that as a look to continue to go up further
Because he thought it would increase tension
But really he made your self-worth decrease

You don't know what it's like to have an unwanted hand go up your skirt
And you thought it was okay to wear a skirt that day
Just like you wore one every other day
Because the Kilt was part of your school uniform
But of course that made your visible legs vulnerable
And it's a good thing that someone else call for his attention
Because you wanted anything but his

And you don't know what it's like to make a scene
Or to tell someone
Because you're not sure if you parents will be more upset
About you talking to boys or that your got yourself into those situations

You don't know what it's like to stay silent
Because you don't want to make matters worse

But it's my body, why would someone think they have access to it?

Because you don't know what it's like to be sexually assaulted

Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

3. Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?

4. What would constitute a perfect day for you?

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

11. Take four minutes and tell you partner your life story in as much detail as possible.

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

14. Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

17. What is your most treasured memory?

18. What is your most terrible memory?

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

20. What does friendship mean to you?

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "we are both in this room feeling..."

26. Complete this sentence "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

28. Tell your partner what you like about them: be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save only one item. What would it be? Why?

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

I don't need your sympathy
I don't need your pity

I just need your help

All you wanted to do that day was talk to me.
All you wanted to do was see me again.

I told you that I wasn't allowed
to take the car to see you that day.

So you took your parents car,
in the middle of the night,
all for a plan to watch the stars with me.

A plan that I never agreed upon
And yet you still went through with it.

And you ended up in a ditch
Because you swerved to avoid a deer.

And you had to call your dad,
and tell him that you were an idiot,
and that you ****** up,
and that his car is now in a ditch.

And then you were grounded for a whole month.

It hurts, doesn't it?
My one word responses and unanswered texts?
Now you know exactly how I felt
When you decided you didn't care anymore.
But now you miss me and I couldn't care less.

"I notmally like darker hair on girls,
But with you it's different," he says.

I've noticed.
I've seen the way you look at it,
When I'm playing with my hair,
As I'm twirling it around my fingers.

The look that you give.
It is the look of a dog,
When he's staring right at you
While you are eating something.

The look of wanting. Desire. Temptation.
And you want to play with it.
You desire my golden locks.
As if the colour had anything to do with your temptations.

Your scent has become chlorine to me.
Every whiff,
Every inhale,
Burns through my nostrils
And into my lungs.

And yet I still cant get enough.

Your eyes were extremely green today.
I noticed that because
They literally glistened
As you stared off, zoning out.
And your whole face changed.
And in those moments,
You were extremely beautiful.

I find it funny how
The person I used to write poems about
Now writes poems for me

You're the reason my heart beats fast.
My one and only, unto last.

The sound of your voice, the taste of your lips.
I crave the touch of your hands, to give you a kiss.

I wish our hands forever intertwined.
Let me stare at your face so benign.

May I hold you close, oh so tight.
Please let me be your shining knight.

Lay with me, let me keep you warm.
They liad when the said: every rose has its thorn.

You know they say: there's no such thing as perfection.
We prove them wrong, with our perfect connection.

My thoughts and dreams won't cease to drift to you.
My emotions and feelings, they're so very true.

I've come to realize I'm lost in you.
Without you here, I don't know what I'd do.

I'm not mad anymore
I wasn't even mad
I was annoyed
I snapped
And I'm sorry

I dont like it
When you bombard
Me with compliments.
You telling me
How great I am.
I dont like it,
It makes me feel
Bad about myself.

Now that Pluto is a planet again,
I’m expecting the world to stop falling apart.

I crave you
As a need
As an emotion
As a solution

I crave your presence
The smell of the soap you use
The heat from your arms wrapped about me
The comfort in your silence

I crave being next to you
In the most innocent way
I just want to spent time with you
I just want want to be near you

You're so addicting
You're like a drug
And *******,
Am I ever hooked.

And I'm stuck.
Not necessarily in a place
That is bad- just inescapable.

I'm lost in you.
It's quite lovely
to be lost in you.
So I'm okay with being stuck.

Last night
We spend hours
Talking on the phone
About our our day
And whatever random thought
That popped into our heads

I could hear you
Becoming more tired
As time went on.
And when it was time to hang up
You said you didn't want me to go

But I could hear you
About to pass out.
And I really had to ***,
So I needed to be let go
Of our conversation.

Keep breaking my heart,
it'll only make my writing
better

My eyes have gone empty,
And my hands started shaking again,
The exhaustion it takes just to pretend-
Yes, all is well.

Whats a home? Mines become a prison,
When I disappear you will all see,
My ******* anxiety was eating me-
Yet I still smiled.

Lately everything’s so ******* dull,
I don’t know how to save myself anymore,
The wounds on my wrist are too sore-
I can’t breathe.

I already said too much.
I already shared too much,
and I want all my secrets back.
I hate getting close to people these days.

I always regret
sharing too much,
caring too much,
doing too much,
feeling too much.

It's really upsetting

How the only time you text me
Is when you're drunk

How you get drunk off of moonshine
That you make with your brothers

How you never cared before
But now I don't care
And you do

You should have opened your eyes
You should have known
I was crazy about you
And now that you have finally noticed
I could not care any less about you

I'm always the friend to tell people
It's okay
I just wish I had to a friend to tell me
It's okay

I used to be sad
I used to cry everyday
I questioned taking my life
I questioned it often
But what changed me
Was realization

I realized I had a dog
A pet that would wait
For you to come home
A pet that wags his tail
When you come home

And I thought
What if I never came back home?
Would he still wait for me?
And  I realized that pets do not understand death
And they wait for their owners to come home
They will wait to see you again

They do not understand that you're gone
That you are never coming back
But they will continue to wait
With hopes that you will come home
Pets don't understand death

When you died
I took it hard
I told you I had something important to tell you
I told you on Friday
I was waiting for Monday to say it

When I found out
I spent the whole day crying
And the next day writing
I wrote five whole pages
Front to back

Everything that reminds me of you
Everything I have ever wanted to tell you
Everything I wish you knew
Everything I should have told you when I had the chance
Were written down

And placed in your casket
I wanted you to know: I loved you

It has been three years now
It doesn't hurt as much anymore
When I think about you
I still think you will just walk into the room

Even though you're gone
And you've been gone for a while
It still hurts
Missing you, when you're never coming back

I don't understand how you wouldn't trust me
I'm the most straight forward person
I say whatever on my mind
I accept anything with a reason
I forgive anything with an explanation
I don't even lie
What would have made you think,
That I would look down upon you for this?

Why do you tell me these lies?
They are hurtful and I have
lost respect for you.
I really wanted to believe you this time.

Not for nothing.
But an apology
would have been nice.
Or at least
would have conveyed
a modicum of respect.

At 2am
Everything is
Either really funny
Or really sad

At 3am
Everything becomes
Even more funny
Or even more sad

And it all depends on how alone you feel

If I could,
I would.

But I can't,
So I won't.

We took crayons to scribble
on the walls of each other’s hearts.
So like children we were, now
broken parents attempting
to bleach away bright stains.

Never cry in your bedroom.
Because a place of comfort
Should never contain sadness.