How am I supposed to cut off
All the negative people in my life
When the only person who
Can make me feel like ****
Lives in the same house?

The silent treatment is the worst.
It is the worst treatment.
And the apology is problematic.

All because you don't know
what you have done wrong.
Because whatever you were doing wrong
you thought it was okay.

And since nobody said anything
you thought it was okay.

And then you get to silent treatment
and you wonder what you have done wrong.
You wonder if it was something you said or did.

And now you have to apologize
for something you are uncertain about
All because you thought it was okay.

I hate you.
My soul is missing. I know you took it.
I miss smiling and happiness is an outdated concept.
Karma will come for you with a baseball bat,
and when your blood stains the earth,
I will smile.

I built my castle and I will also tear it down.
If you had a heart I would eat it,
if you had a soul I would steal it.
But I’m not cruel so I’ll just leave you alone.

I’m a friend of the devils. Are you a friend of mine?

I hate you
Because I trusted you
I believed you

I thought our feelings were mutual
You told me how much you like like me
I felt the same way

I hate you
Because you dont care anymore
You dont talk to me anymore

I can’t force you to love
or want me anymore.
That is if you
even did in the first place.

I care
More about writing poems
Than I do about homework

I care
More about the people in my life
Than I do about education

I care
More about you
Than I do about myself

I used to go to bed
With a happy thought of you on my mind
And now youre gone
You wont even talk to me
Im going to bed
Feeling bare
I dont know what to think about anymore

You called me bae
Do you even know the meaning of that word?
It is not a shortened version of Babe
It stands for Before Anything Else

When you called me bae
I took it as being important and love
To you it was a less attached meaning of babe
I was nothing when you told me I was before anything else

Theres plenty of fish in the sea.
But at least take the hook out of my mouth
before tossing me back in the ocean.

I have a mug
That has "coffee" written all over it
There's even little beans on it
But I only ever use it to make tea

I've done some wrong things
That I will keep repeating
For the rest of my life

There are many things
I have promised myself
And failed

But the one thing
I will promise myself
And keep

I will not die a ******.

The river flows,
The creek stinks;
Both are canals,
But a creek is much narrow.
And the river and the sea,
are connected,
The creek?
Most of the time it really,
really stinks.

Every time I check I phone
I expect to see a text from you
And every time there isn't a message
I set my phone down in disappointment
And accept that I am not worthy of your time

I don't know why I still blame you
For every time I get sad
I used to spend days, weeks, months
Crying over you,
But it's not your fault
You were killed

Sitting in a restaurant in cottage country.
with my parents, my friend,my sister and her two friends.
I'm eating these miniature boneless chicken wings
I feel a pain in my chest,
I take a sip of my ice tea through a straw
And sit there holding my chest and closing my eyes
--
In my head is a jack hammer just pounding
My whole body feels pinned down
but also moving like the jack hammer
--
Laying on the ground I see my father leaning over top of me
I am on my back
He is pinning me down
My vision blacking out and head still pounding
"Call 911, she's having a seizure"

The only thing I can manage to say is "no"
"no. No! no! NO! No? NO... no no nonono...."
And the only thing I could think of was 'I don'y want to be a seizure person'
Epileptic is what i meant to say, but the word didn't come to me.
Tears are rushing down my face, terrified.
I can only hope this is a one time thing.

As I am helped up by my mom and escorted to the bathroom
I see all these faces looking at me
Faces of sympathy
That is the worst feeling ever.
Being stared as you are leaving the room after a seizure

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I kinda really
Really miss you

I’m my own assassin.
Whether it’s rereading texts that I know destroy me, or purposely looking through social media that I know will negatively affect me.
I don’t know why I enjoy making myself suffer.

British wield guns.
Americans threw snowballs.
Five dead.

I have troubles sleeping
Mainly because I want to cuddle
I just want some one to hug
Or be hugged as I fall asleep
I just want to be cuddled to sleep
Is that to much to ask for?

The friend with a pool
No friends ever comes over
I'm too far away

We have been talking for over 2 months
I saw your face in a friend's instagram picture
I made a joke and asked my friend for your number
He asked you if it was okay to give me you number
You said yes
I got really excited, and I sent you a message

I liked you from the start
We messaged happily for over 2 weeks
You called me "bae" and "babe" and "boo"
All of a sudden you didn't talk to me for a whole week
You said sorry and that you had you phone taken away
But I still don't think that's the case

Two months later
Were still texting daily
I'm usually the last to message at night
And in the mornings, I get a "morning babe:*"
You told me that you actually really like me
I told you the feeling was mutual

We made tentative plans for Friday night
You called for a rain check Thursday morning
Friday it really rained, in February
Good Call!
I would've been to nervous anyways
We still haven't met each other
I haven't even heard you voice on the phone

I sit here
I read
I stare
I wait
I write
I wait
I read
I smile
I respond
I set my phone down
And I wait

My phone vibrates
My thumbs fumble
My eyes scan the name
My eyes read the message
My heart swoons
My mind searches for a response
My thumbs write the message
MY phone is set down
And that was a smooth comment