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Feb 2019 · 197
Relax
Destre' Feb 2019
Rest is hard for a heavy heart
Apr 2018 · 386
Its my favorite too
Destre' Apr 2018
“I took
the sweatshirt
from the chair
in your room

Your favorite
Philadelphia Eagles
Sweatshirt

I send my regrets
You’re probably cold
It’s kept me warm
And it still
Smells like you”
I miss you
Apr 2018 · 239
Ink Blotch
Destre' Apr 2018
Painted
Pointed
Plastic
Tube

Holding
Squid
Excretions

Glide
Across
Dead
Trees
Apr 2018 · 244
Hallucinogen
Destre' Apr 2018
It was flaccid on my tongue.
Tie dye design fading,
Tightly pressed fibers dissipating,
A paper spitball soon to be dissolved.

Out of sight out of mind,
Until the wood grain on his dresser started to shift,
Move together then apart
Like a kaleidoscope in tones of brown

I stumbled out,
Thin socks met frozen wooden planks,
Then black jeans were introduced
As I took a seat criss-crossed: perched.

Snow fell from above
Like shooting stars abandoning the sky.
They landed on my lashes,
So I blinked a Big Bang and galaxies were born.

Frostbite should’ve crept into my fingertips,
But I was all tingles: pins and needles,
My nerve endings firing like new year’s sparklers at midnight.

Music filled my ears without a sound in the air.
Northern lights were waves emitted from trees
And the waves in the sky danced in time to my imaginary melody.

He snuck up behind me,
Seemed to appear beside me,
So I laid my head on his knees,
But his leg hair started to crawl,
Each strand a pink and green gradient
Like a **** carpet come to life,
A 1970’s nightmare

He looked down at me
His pupils like black holes: ******* me in
Shivers crawled up my spine:
A thousand spiders carrying snowflakes.

He wasn't talking but his face was moving: morphing,
It wasn't gloopy as you'd expect morphing to be,
But sharp, Jagged:
Stained glass mismatched.
revised
Feb 2018 · 282
A day dream
Destre' Feb 2018
The same road I've walked down a thousand times
suddenly opens up to clear blue skies
And I can practically hear it ringing in my ears
the waves of the ocean that I've been dreaming about for years
The birds, the wind, the sand between my toes
The sun on my skin, lounging around sipping mojitos
"Paradise is a place that's far from home,
and lately all I ever see is everything I've ever known"

But then the clouds roll in
reminding me, I'm in the same place I've always been
The italicized lyric is from Paradise by Ryan Caraveo
Destre' Feb 2018
A blocked up
Jumbled mess
like a flock of birds in a cage
when you try to let one out
somehow they all find a way to escape
Feb 2018 · 212
Stoned fruit salad
Destre' Feb 2018
Sweet smoke in her lungs
clouds fill her head
Move down to a sticky feeling between her legs
pushed past her stomach and intestines; buried in her guts
flashes of fresh fruit come dancing across her bed
 Strawberries, Bananas
 Peaches and Pomegranates
Her stomach in her throat
Her heart pounding in her head
A rapid heart beat and sparkling nausea leaves things unsaid
Feb 2018 · 554
Drawing a map
Destre' Feb 2018
I thought this was a painting I hadn't started
but its a collage with sections like open water
With territories left uncharted
I've got some strange inspiration
Dec 2017 · 255
Resolution
Destre' Dec 2017
Im trying to get back into this writting thing, you see?
Because I feel like I've lost touch with a huge part of me.
When I write I sound diffrent than I do in my head,
diffrent than how I sound laying in bed,
You see? I'm trying to resurrect this part of me that's dead
(Or dying)

I miss it,
I miss thinking for myself,
(Not that I've ever thought for someone else)
but I want to get back in my skin.
Not deep enough to drown,
just deep enough to make a sound.
new years resolution: Write something every day, even if its short and not very good.
Dec 2017 · 166
Comical
Destre' Dec 2017
My life's a huge joke...
Wait, wait, wait, it's funny, I swear, I'm just about to get to the punchline
... And nobody cares!
Dec 2017 · 168
control, Lack of
Destre' Dec 2017
Blurry vision
And bad decisions

A rush of heat
And a bit of relief

Your hand between my thighs
God that look in your eyes

When it hits I feel like I'm flying
Part of me is probably dying

Inhaling sunshine and fresh cut grass
Man, this **** tastes like ***

Soft Kisses turn heated and sloppy
***** it, get on top of me
Dec 2017 · 196
Trip
Destre' Dec 2017
Little piece of paper
What have you done for me?
I sat on the porch and thought
"How have I never noticed the world is this pretty?"

To be continued...
Jan 2017 · 243
Ee-rot-iC
Destre' Jan 2017
Let's start a new chapter*
Where he's kneeling and she sits
Slowly he'd lick his lips
And make a trail with his finger tips
It'd move into vauge sentences
Simple movements
Feelings
Shapes and colors
Imaginations thrown into overdrive
filling in the blanks
Thought up
All cought up, in some girls daydream
She decided to write it down... With more detail
Dec 2016 · 467
I pretend
Destre' Dec 2016
I'm drowning in the pounding of my own heartbeat
Oct 2016 · 252
Must be a natural
Destre' Oct 2016
Leave the door unlocked And a light on
Let me sneak through your room at the break of dawn
I'll wake you with a kiss
And other things you wouldn't want to miss
As you open your eyes
You'll find a lovely surprise
*"You're good at this"
"Funny, it's not like I've had much practice"
Oct 2016 · 640
Panic attack
Destre' Oct 2016
The world crashes in on itself
Mixing into a conglomeration of colors and blurry shapes
Breathe
I close my eyes and try to focus
My chest moves up and down as if I'd just got done running
Only
I haven't moved
And as it moves I know there should be air filling my lungs but I can't seem to get enough
Can't seem to
Take
A deep
Breath
My head feels light
Like it's floating on clouds just waiting
To come
crashing
down
Breathe
What's wrong with me I'm pathetic Get a grip
Calm. down.
My thoughts scream!

Just breathe

But I can't
The world won't stop spinning
My chest won't stop moving
And my lungs won't fill
**I can't breathe
Try pretending to blow out a candle
Sep 2016 · 1.1k
Moments
Destre' Sep 2016
I have moments
I have moments where things fall away
Where the world is fuzzy
I have moments where things fade to grey
Where the world becomes dark
I have these moments where I can't think
Where I want to scream
I have these moments I can't explain
And yet, I have moments
I have moments where everything seems clear
Where things start to become light
These moments when the world flushes back to color
And I start to write
I have moments where I get lost
Sep 2016 · 561
Hey good sir, Thanks
Destre' Sep 2016
I read and reread
Again and a again
Each time finding something new
Each time wondering about somthing different
When I can't think
When I can't clear my head
When I'm bored
When I need inspiration
When I'm haveing a bad day
Or when I'm in an awkward social situation
I scroll down as far as it will load
Then I start to read
I could read almost anything you've written a thousand times and never get bored
I wish I could write them all down and make a book
I'd call it the The Golden One and take it with me where ever I go
There's somthing more comforting about pulling out a book instead of a phone
Jul 2016 · 211
Inside out
Destre' Jul 2016
I have a groan inside
It's manifested itself somewhere between my chest and back
A little lower than my heart
It feels like anticipation
The dreadful kind
When you know the other shoe is about to drop
And then it does
It lingers and plucks the stings of my internal organs
It plays me like an out of tune guitar
My heart races
My stomach churns
I sweat
I get the itches and the chills and the shakes
I think this interment would rather have been left in its case
Jul 2016 · 325
What now
Destre' Jul 2016
I feel like I'm going to be sick
Pukes everywhere
That didn't make me feel any better
Nope, matter of fact, I still kinda feel like ****
Destre' Jun 2016
You don't know if you're inlove or just want to be loved
*I don't know

So you're probably not inlove?  Is that how that works?
Jun 2016 · 207
Grey
Destre' Jun 2016
Honestly, The thought of you still takes my breath away
Only now it's not in a good way
Jun 2016 · 1.5k
Dear past self
Destre' Jun 2016
You are Me
I was you
You were me
But now I am new
Even though you are still you
You are no longer me
Because now I am me
Through and through
Now we are two;
Separate.
I'm okay
May 2016 · 287
Who knew they wouldnt last?
Destre' May 2016
These roses have turned brown
The the leaves all wilted
Their petals fell to the ground
Now they see the world through a veiw that's tilted
May 2016 · 356
Wouldve been easy
Destre' May 2016
I Ment to say hello
Five letters
Four slightly different shapes my mouth wouldve formed
Three seconds or less to pronounce
Two syllables
One, simple word
But I thought about it for five minutes too long
As you took four steps in the opposite direction
There were three moments in which I could've called after you
two seconds where I almost did
There was one simple word that I really Ment to say
Hi
Apr 2016 · 382
In the somewhat dark
Destre' Apr 2016
It's not even dark*
But it's horribly dark
Don't you see?
How the walls inch closer
And the shadows jump out at me
How the floor creeks
And the breeze creeps
Through the window past the currents
It's terribly dark
But you can't see...
Your blind to what lurks
What jumps, creeks, and what creeps
The street light shines in
So no.. I guess It's not dark
Apr 2016 · 333
Going for a walk
Destre' Apr 2016
The road seems to flow like the ocean reflecting the midnight sky
Wind sways the limbs of an oak tree near by
Light from a street lamp casts there shadows down
They shift and sway and flow when no ones around
But shh...
Not many know
That at night, there's an ocean just up the road
Was it an oak tree?
Destre' Apr 2016
One window
one door
but no where to go
Seems I can't run from the thought of him
I can't hide from the happy memories
And I can't trick myself into believing
that this feeling has gone away
Maybe it will one day. I don't really like posting things like this, it feels a little redundant, but whatever. Can there be, or is there, a saying that goes "the only stupid ideas are the ones not shared" I think the one I'm thinking of is about questions.
Mar 2016 · 489
Taking out a red pen
Destre' Mar 2016
Once so close
Now so far
Two trains on parallel tracks
With no chance of a head on collision
I think I need to take a step back
Set a pen to these pages and start making some revisions
Takin' a look, past, present, future, I have no plan but maybe it's time to make one
Feb 2016 · 555
Heartbreak
Destre' Feb 2016
It's like a flutter in my heart
A sudden rush of gravity
As it falls out of its place that was once behind my rib cage

It's a flutter in my chest of the worst kind
Not one of butterfly wings or hummingbirds
Not one of shy smiles and blushing cheeks
Its One of less than beautiful misery

No this isn't a flutter of wonder
This is one of dark corners where the unknown lurks
This is one of dead trees in an unkept desolate cemetery

Maybe one day I'll look on the bright side

Maybe one day this flutter of sudden gravity pulling my heart though my chest
Will subside
It'll be okay.
Feb 2016 · 302
Things are never done
Destre' Feb 2016
With each inch the caterpillar crawls
the leaf it's after is blown another foot

With every flower the bee buzzy around
there are five more that need to be visited

With every page turned
there are a million more to read
Feb 2016 · 780
Its far from a dull color
Destre' Feb 2016
Eyes grey like the clouds of a rainy day
Hard with your anger
Soft with your smile
Your eyes were grey changing shades with the light
Mesmerising
Beautiful in such an odd way
I always thought it was such a dull color
Until you looked at me that night in the dark
And I got lost in your shifting grey eyes
I still get lost in them..
Feb 2016 · 260
Blow
Destre' Feb 2016
The candles burnt out
One by one
And I was thrown into the dark
And it was then that I felt the weight of the cold
Jan 2016 · 1.0k
Title not recalled
Destre' Jan 2016
In the darkness of day
And the light of night
I'll talk to the stars
And listen to the whispers of the wind

As my vision blurs
And time becomes distorted
I'll dance under the eyes of the moon
And sing to the clouds
I'll chase the sun as it sets on the horizon
And as I run I'll get lost in the rush of colors all around

In the depths of white
And the shallows of black
Where the asphalt meets the sidewalk
meets the grass
I'll lay
And stare up at the trees
who'll stare back down at me
We'll have a staring contest
Untill finally I fall asleep
Jan 2016 · 325
Hanging on to blured lines
Destre' Jan 2016
Can't stand to think
So take a seat
Hanging on to...I don't know

Losing the battle, between okay and not
Mourning the loss of clarity
Memories are fading... or are they
disintegrating


Screaming for help even though
you don't want to be saved
at least not by someone else


*give it time and youll be fine they said
How much time has gone by?
Destre' Jan 2016
I don't want to write something sad
I don't want to write something while on the brink of tears
I don't want to write something filled with fears

I want to write something beautiful
I want to write something equivalent to a summer morning
One where the trees look black against the dim sunrise and the birds sing and the wind blows gently as if to rejoice in the new days light once again

I want to write something worth remembering
Like the first time one sees the northern lights in the dark winter sky
Like the red, green and blue dancing across the stars

I want to write something that makes someone smile
I want to write something that makes someone stop and think for a moment
I want to write something that someone somewhere finds something in
I want to write something that hasn't been written before in other words

But alas, when I write I get lost in the dark
In the cold
In the fact that the stars are so far away and aurora borealis isnt something magical but is caused by solar flares
In the fact that with anything good something bad almost always follows

I wanted to write something beautiful
I wanted to make someone somewhere smile

I can see the colors and hear the birds
I can feel the breeze and smell the sweet smell given off of bluming trees
But to everything beautiful there is something ugly

Why do I always find myself writting about the ugly?
"But Hey! Don't listen to me! 'cos this wasn't meant to be no sad song .
I've sung too much of that before" - The island

This write is awfully long and slightly repetitive
Dec 2015 · 1.6k
Take your time with me
Destre' Dec 2015
We're trains on two different tracks,
Living parallel lives, only passing by.
I have dreams of a head on collision,
One where the breaks are hit just fast enough so neither one of us is comepleatly destroyed.

But I might not mind being destroyed by you
if you take your time with me
Dec 2015 · 490
A purple mystery snail
Destre' Dec 2015
Suddenly I feel heavy
there's a new profound weight crashing down on me
For so long I've been floating
But now gravity pulls me back
what goes up must come down

I'm free falling into oblivion
Destre' Dec 2015
You hold me in a state of beautiful misery,
invited agony.
Loving you is painful bliss,
welcomed heartbreak.
Everything and nothing at all,
perfectly imperfect,
overly complicated and overly simple,
you hold me in a state of beautiful misery.
But I want nothing less, I knew what I was getting into.
Dec 2015 · 1.1k
Arn't we? Couldn't we be?
Destre' Dec 2015
I get frustrated when people make assumptions about poets
They're sad
They're mad
They're all the same

Arn't we all poets? In one way or another?
Or couldn't we be?
Poetry is everywhere, in everything.
They're not "just words" and I don't think poets are one specific select group of people.
Everyone could be a poet, in one way or another.
Some just use different mediums: a poet of paint on canvas arranging it in a certain way to invoke a certain feeling of sorts.
A poet of body movement set to music.
A poet in there head thinking up combinations of words but deciding there best left unsaid, undocumented.
There can't truely be a poet stereotype... Because we're all poets... Or could be..In one way or another.
I once read something titled "Just words"  that kind of blew my mind and really made me think about things and realize that it really is kind of at the essences of everything.
Dec 2015 · 416
Room temperature: chilled
Destre' Dec 2015
Id rather sleep in the cold than to burn under blankets
Is it a metaphor??
Agreed, I think it sounds better after being revised. :)
Dec 2015 · 297
Maybe empty?
Destre' Dec 2015
There are things to do and a routine to follow
So why is it when I'm alone I'm left feeling so hollow?
Dec 2015 · 229
Turned to dust
Destre' Dec 2015
A terrified little girl resides inside her.
So She built a wall,
Of 8 feet tall,
To try and keep her at bay.

She did her best, and pushed and shoved, saying I will not let my fear be my maker.
But alas the wall was built of sticks and straw,
And one day will be blown away.

Truth be told when the wall does fall,
So will the girl who tried to rise above it all,
And the fear that she's kept locked up,
Will finally come out to play.

She was fighting a battle,
that she couldn't handle,
All she wanted was to be okay.
And now left alone,
chilled to the bone,
She slowly starts to decay.
Destre' Dec 2015
I'm afraid I'm falling like I've fallen before,
I'm afraid of the dark hole that awaits me
if I let myself fall anymore,
But I can't seem to stop slipping.
I'm doing what I can,
I'm really trying here,
But everything I'm trying to grab ahold of,
Seems to up and disappear
A losing battle between past, present and future.  Between loneliness and dispare.
Destre' Dec 2015
Anyone can be someone for a short period of time
Something I've learned.
Dec 2015 · 284
Whats happening?
Destre' Dec 2015
How do you write without feeling
How to you express yourself without meaning
If theres No reason
If theres no yearning
If there were no one eager for learning
If no ones speaking and no ones listening
If there's no one thinking
and no one questioning
If there are no tears
No fears
No fists of rage
No love and no hate
Then wouldn't we be left empty?
Are we really destined for this fate?
If there is no meanings and no feelings then there is nothing
Then arnt we left with nothing?
Is this destiny of youthful generations
with seemingly nothing to say
but about "how hot" there precious  little boyfriends are
and about "how grose they are"
because there 105 pounds and 5ft 3 because apparently they should only be 93 lb
Because 105 is apparently just to heavy
Is this destiny set in stone?
Or merly written in the fine print of a ****** contract that no one cared to read?
Is there some loophole we can slip through?
Can we undo the lack of what has been
done?
Or are we condemed
to the sad nothing I keep hearing we've become
Did I use the wrong there?? .-. I always get them mixed up
Destre' Nov 2015
My eyes burn
Or maybe it's just my head that hurts
Please stop talking
I can't bare another word
Stop for the sake of my sanity
If you keep going on Im bound to use some profanity
I won't be able to help myself you see
Because what's spilling out of your mouth is a travisty
Stop now
please stop, before you force me to make an *** out of us both
But mainly just out of you. I promise you won't like me when I'm done. So please stop. Your redicules.
Nov 2015 · 524
Observant
Destre' Nov 2015
Today you will learn.
You will learn because I'll tell you how.
You will listen because you want to know.
This isn't a class room of grey walls,
squeaky desks,
and an over done curriculum.
Today you will learn because I'll show you how
When you shut your mouth,
When you sit quietly and become part of the background,
When you learn to see
but seem as though you are not looking
When you learn to hear
but seem as though you are not listening
When the information isn't being pounded into your head
but is being nudged towards you
When you learn to figure things out on your own
When you learn that it's okay to be alone
Maybe then the world will start to make sense
Just watch, listen, I promise you'll learn a lot
*Class dismissed
Being a wall flower, being quiet, isn't a bad thing.. You can learn a lot if you just learn to pay attention
Destre' Oct 2015
In the end
when the rain clouds have cleared
and the wind no longer blows
through good and bad
I'll be there

when things get hard and you're drifting
I'll grab you by the hand and guide you back to me
when you start to lose your balance and it seems like you might fall
I'll steady you and assure you everything's alright

I'll be there
through good and bad
when the rain clouds have cleared
and the wind no longer blows
in the end i'll still be holding your hand

when the mountains keep climbing higher and nothing's getting any easier
when you feel like you can't take another step
I'll be the shoulder you can lean on
we’ll climb this mountain together
you don't have to do this on your own

because what's the point in loving if i'm going to leave at the first sign of trouble
when your world has become a tornado threatening to be your undoing
and you don't know where to go
I'll do my best to be your anchor until you can find your way into the eye of the storm

In the end
when the rain clouds have cleared
and the wind no longer blows
through good and bad
I'll be there

I have no fear of this
I won't walk away
when all signs are pointing to a terrible ending
I'll take my pen and rewrite the story

When the sun shows itself once again
I'll be there holding your hand
through good and bad
I'm not going anywhere

Your anchor
your gravity
a shoulder to lean on
someone to rewrite this ending
I'll do what I can to be what you need

I'll be there
through good and bad
when the rain clouds have cleared
and the wind no longer blows
in the end
I'll still be holding your hand
For him.
One day I want to try to set this to music.
Destre' Oct 2015
Pride, lust, gluttony, anger, greed, two three one, three five two
They go hand in hand, all alone shadows dance, dark figures
Three two one, now I've got them trapped
A small box, shut tight, holding them within
Three one two, let me be, an..
..unwanted memory left broken, missing pieces, unfinished
Four one five, let me be, I no longer want to be a part of this torn painting
mmm, so, maybe not necessarily in a completely different direction, at least in my head. Memories can be haunting.
The last word of every line is from the interesting, if not amazing, poem by JDK titled “blushing”
"Blushing by JDK." Hello Poetry. N.p., 9 Apr. 2015. Web. 27 Oct. 2015.
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/1146774/blushing/
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