I didn’t expect to find such serenity
From the battle that is life
Or in the presence of monsters and demons
So eager to ravage my humanity

How can I not
When time and time again
You are the light that shines bright
In all of my dark nights?

Define Reality.
The endless battles of society.
How each step up the chains
increases business gains.
But not only concieves a heresy,
A path they think they are forced to follow.
Whatever happened to YOLO?
We do not choose our own path,
but we are never forced to follow.

Flash a smile
Or fake a laugh
And move on forward
Because it will all be in the past;
Someday.
Someway.
Somehow.
Before it's too late
And your emotions get the best of you
And your head stops spinning
From all of the thoughts that they fill it with
And the pain you can't hide
Anymore.
Without the evidence on your sleeves
How is anyone supposed to believe
That you're a mess on the inside of your head
And out?

The past can make it so easy to relapse

not because of the past itself

but

running away from it

and burying it in the subconscious,

hiding it away and letting it silently

fest fest fest.

Is what causes you to be haunted.

---

Pain;

A raging sore, a deep wound, an eternal scar,

just wants to be felt; acknowledged.

So I try not, to ignore it

when I see the marks of the past; knives

digging into the valves of my heart; pain

even when it comes back

strong and hard and fighting

like a hurricane

carrying me away under water

suffocating the freedom in my punctured lungs

I will not let it destroy me.

—-

Its not because I am weak that I struggle with it

but the brain is strong; be aware...

For thoughts can make you a victim of your own mind

though I hope
there will be a time when

healing, that miraculous God-sent healing is at the end.

When

you stop ignoring the past

and instead start loving those broken pieces, the shame you felt,

the fear that crippled

and realise

it will soon ease, soon melt away, soon diminish

and you’ll remember

**pain has no authority to hurt

you would think mothers
supposed to be good and caring
parents,
and i would like to think
that you were an evil monster
that always put me down
and never believe i could
do anything,
well, congratulations,
mom,
you were right and you
won that battle against me,
the one that you fought
for so many years.

thank you, mom,
your assumptions,
-like always- were correct,
and you made me the
monster that i am today.

*i wouldn't want to
be anything else,