the air is so thick that even your thoughts melt away
in the Southern heat.  sweat starts pouring until your
clothes start clinging to you like an unwanted lover.  heat and sweat seperates the true Southerners from the wannabe's,
who don't truly love a place even when it's too **** hot.

my soul was hibernating
until gently roused by Your love

It's the mad saints that interest me,
the holy fools of the Divine Mystery.

Ikkyu. Ezekiel. Buddha. Jesus. Lao-Tzu.

The ones where their lives turn upside down,
just because they walk a path against
the flow of convention.

A holy fool laughs a laughter that
cuts through all the ******* and hypocricy.
A laughter that rises from the heart,
And enters the heart of another
like a small spark before a wild fire.

i feel the Inner Light
shining inward and outward
in the holy silence

i've been lost                             for so long
that it feels wrong                    to be home.
being at peace                           and to belong
seems abnormal,                      which seems insane.

i am finally home,                    a place  that i can be me
where i  am free                        and learn to grow.

home is                                      where my heart goes
my heart                                    always with me.

everything looked and felt so hopeless
never would have thought 4 years a go
that my life would be so full

grateful i wake up most days grateful to be alive,
where as before i woke everyday praying for
God to **** me

i just needed a spiritual awakening to tweak my perspective
from hopelessness to hope
constant criticism to gratitude

nothing else
is needed
just hope,
and trust
in *love

I hover between worlds
"I am a spiritual being having a human experience"
and not the other way around,
when I embrace that truth
each single moment shines with brilliance.

I have hungered to be filled,
satiated down to the very fiber of
my being.

Am I crazy to crave food with such
carnal intensity?  Expecting chocolate
sugary goodness to satisfy the soul's
hunger underneath my physical craving.

But not everything has to be about God,
does it?  Sometimes, I just want to savor
the rich decadence of dark chocolate mingled
the burning fire of a chili pepper.

Am I coveting?  Am I being sinful to be too
material and sensual?  ******* it!  I bet
God loves taking a slow bite of chocolate.

I keep dividing the world into
material and spiritual.  
Maybe that's why I'm so hungry?

the cool wind in my hair
as you and I glide across
the cement jungle.

You make my life tolerable
in this crazy urban landscape,
my trusty metal steed that
helps me duck and weave in
stand still traffic of the Nation's capital.

nothing like flying through the city on you, my bicycle,
on this beautiful spring day.  I know you can't speak,
but if you could, you would also say "wheeeeee" with glee.

the world explodes in
the infinite now

in this one single moment
I experience infinity
where I live the truth that
I am always connected to everything
we are connected by the great tapestry of life

my heart explodes with joy in
the infinite now

serenity flowers in my life
when I sit in the throne of my heart

peace flows like a river
when I open my heart

lives burn bright
and die out

some are remembered
and some forgotten

each light is precious and unique
in the end which lights are remembered is
insignificant

Who needs sleep,
when crazy thoughts
cozy up to me?

loss, grief, pain,
shame, and guilt
are warm faithful bedfellows

I love how the world glows yellow
in the early morning light.
The birds sing their songs,
and life begins to stir.

Moments before,
at the edge of darkness,
there is a deep stillness
and a beautiful eerie silence.

Moments after,
the world explodes in orange light.
The morning light changes so
brilliantly and quickly,
and just like that it's gone.

your small body sinks into my arms
I will hold you as long as I am able
I promise to hold you close and safe
until you awaken to run away to explore
my little adventurer I love you,
let the beating of my heart soothe you to sleep
i will hold you through toothaches and heartaches

I cry out into the Deep,
                                           hoping against hope that someone may hear.
My pain and anguish
                                           crushing my soul into nothing.

I cry out into the Deep,
                                           and Something beyond my understanding reaches out.

                                          It pulls me out of myself from the Nothing into life.

The Deep cries out to me,
so I may return home.

I was afraid of silence
The type of      silence  that felt heavy and oppressive.

The                  silence            before my father's fists would land on flesh.
      

But there's another type of  silence,                  one that is freeing.
The silence before laughter,                                silence that connects.
The silence that feels like the Great Void,        infinite and whole.
                                               silence that bridges all the
                                             fragments of pain and longing.
                                                        ­ silence before
                                                          ­  flowering
                                                     ­             of
                                                 ­              LOVE

love is energy
that creates and destroys
life and death

unrelenting thoughts are vying
for valuable space in my head

willingness to
be honest and vulnerable
cracks open the door of my heart
to allow love to flood in,
so I can then share what I have

fear holds me captive and
keeps the door of my heart closed.
I cannot give away what I don't have.

love frees me to open up to life,
and trust in connecting with another, which always feels like a leap.

my body rejects milk
I wish it rejected
your lies

vague thoughts
muddled with desire
surging me into nothing

searching for meaning
in meaningless small talk
desperate for connection

lost, only to be found,
then discarded
what a loss?

all of life's dramas
acted and reenacted,
before last call.  

more time to drown
our sorrows away
into oblivion

the music faded long
before hearts were broken

it would be a very sad song indeed
if life was an unrequited love song

lucky for me that my last song
is an instrumental jazz number
with an upbeat tempo

your laughter bursts through
all my insecurities

your smile reminds me why
I love you

my heart laughs with you

my heart explodes with joy
as I flutter my wings

I will never fly as gracefully
or as long as the other birds

but when I am in the air
even for a moment
I feel free

my broken wings lift me up
to where I do not know,
but somewhere etched in my heart

a strange thing happened when I
started singing songs of gratitude
for learning to fly with broken wings

other birds with broken wings
started to gather around me
sharing their experience and hopes

I am free as my heart sings joyfully
my own hopes and dreams
as I share my experience
to help another bird with broken wings
to journey a little closer
to the place etched in their hearts

and somehow I am exactly
where I am supposed to be
flying with broken wings

all effortlessly
flowing out
of me,
when I
let go

each breath is precious
each breath i die a little

i am grateful for my life
i am grateful for being mortal

each moment is precious, because it never happens again
each moment is a gift, because i am a "spiritual being having a human experience."

living poetry
roots me into
the seat
of my heart

bodies move
           my heart beats
                   my breath becomes short

sometimes life always seems in motion
                    moving too fast for me to catch up
                                    strange that i am trying to catch up
                                                                ­                                  to my own life

as i slowly become aware of my breath
my life begins to slow down
i am still in motion,
but my head is quiet and my heart is at peace.

i am grounded in the inner cell of my heart,
and now i can go about doing the will of my Creator
with a heart at ease.

crushed by the weight
of despair

lifted by Divine love

life is like jazz
                 sometimes all you can do
                                                          is improvise
                                      based on                            the template you know
                                                 doing the best                               you can
                                                 going with the                              flow                          of life.

musical notes                         blending
                                                                                                         into one,
                       sometimes      blaring into                                    cacophony               of sound.

little gestures of Your love
carry me through the day

the wind greets me gently
and i embrace its touch

my heart sings as I ride
into the unknown path

my heart filled
with gratitude

I am overflowing
with Love

Life seemed so
dreadfully pointless

And now everything
comes alive