Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
1.3k · Feb 2019
In the Shower
Lupus- Feb 2019
In the shower I cry
In the shower I break
In the shower is where
I name my mistake

In the shower I’m happy
In the shower I’m cold
In the shower is where
All my stories are told

In the shower I’m mad
In the shower I’m hot
In the shower is where
My heart feels like a knot

In the shower I talk
In the shower I pray
In the shower is where
All my feelings would stay

In the shower I’m sad
In the shower I plead
In the shower is where
I plant my seed

In the shower I think
In the shower I scream
In the shower is where
I would keep my dream

In the shower I remember
In the shower I shrink
In the shower is where
All my memories would sink

In the shower I’m not shy
In the shower I grow
In the shower is where
My soul would glow
967 · Aug 2020
No Guarantee
Lupus- Aug 2020
I can see disappointment in your eyes
And how your love for me dies
I can see you no longer want me
As if disgusted by what you see

But I’m trying to understand you
Justifying everything you do
Because you’re struggling as well
I see you’re pain, I can tell

I won’t get in your way
I’ll do anything to make sure you’re okay
I’ll be the perfect child you need me to be
I’ll make you proud you’ll see

It’s difficult to feel fine though, it’s tough
It still hurts knowing I’m not good enough
And as hard as I try you’re not proud
To be the reason of your smile I’m not allowed

I want you to feel proud inside
Hug me and love me with pride
But it seems there is no guarantee
For my dream to be
Could you possibly make them proud? At least for once?
943 · Dec 2019
I Wanted
Lupus- Dec 2019
All I ever wanted was for someone to listen
I wanted someone to pay attention
To tell me things would get better
And that happiness would last forever
I wanted someone to give me advice
All about my life to notice
I wanted someone to understand
To support and lend me a hand
I wanted someone who'd never leave me alone
To know me from deep inside my bone
I wanted someone to love me
As far as the end of the galaxy
I wanted someone to treat me with respect
To make me feel a little perfect
I wanted someone to make me feel special
And to not make my life seem so small
I wanted someone to wipe away all of my tears
Helping me get over my fears
I wanted someone to be my friend
To always bring my misery to an end
658 · Aug 2020
Letting You Go
Lupus- Aug 2020
It's really hard to believe
The words coming out of your mouth
I do my best to justify you
But it doesn't seem to work this time
Not this time
All these constant lies
How many more chances do you need
Until you finally decide to change
Do you think I will fall for them again
I have before and I was a fool for doing so
But not anymore, I'm letting you go
Not this time
574 · May 2020
Menacing Zone
Lupus- May 2020
My thoughts drown me out
Unable to ask for help or shout
The bad haunting my head
On my fears it's what it fed

It's all flowing down no way to stop
With misery and sorrow in every drop
My vision no longer clear
Blurred out by what I fear

All these emotions whirling inside
Tired of having to hide
So they get out all at once
With all its mighty force

When destroying everything in its way
Nothing peaceful can stay
There's no end, there's no control
For my feelings bursting out along with my soul

Unable to breathe I guess I forgot how
Confused on what to do now
I just lay there motionless
Tired and hopeless

Making an effort to speak, but can't understand a word
My gasping is the only thing heard
I'm breaking down, nothing is functioning
Except for my eyes only capable of crying

I was living a dark nightmare
Monsters coming to life without a care
I'm left weak hearing all these voices
Unable to make other choices

It was terrifying feeling all alone
In this fearsome and menacing zone
An endless pain I don't want to come back
For I fear I won't have enough strength to counter the attack
...mental breakdown...
408 · Dec 2019
I Need Someone
Lupus- Dec 2019
I need someone to talk to
I need someone to know what to do
i need someone who'd understand what I go through
I need someone like you
I need someone to care
I need someone who's love they'd share
I need someone to be fair
I need someone to always be there
I need someone to understand
I need someone who'd be there to lend a hand
I need someone to make me feel special like the ocean and sand
I need someone to turn my life so great and grand
I need someone to listen
I need someone to pay attention
I need someone to keep my eyes open
I need someone to fix all that is broken
344 · Jul 2020
Living Nightmare
Lupus- Jul 2020
And all this pain they are suffering
Is all because of you
You are guilty for every tear they shed
For every scream they let out
For all their sleepless nights
Awake at late hours
Worrying about you
Struggling to accept all the damage
Even after all you have done to them
They continue to love you
I think that's what hurts the most
Their love of their life
Is killing them
Day by day
And you
Turn a blind eye
Face the other way
Ignorant of all the the things you are doing
You don't care
All you worry about is getting your way
Even if that means stomping over them
The people that love you the most
That are willing to give up their whole world
They are dying inside
Burning inside from all the heartache
And it's all because of you
Their living nightmare
How could you?
325 · Jun 2020
No Veo Lo Que Usted Ve
Lupus- Jun 2020
Yo la quiero, la amo
Y sé que siente lo mismo por mí
Pero hay veces que dudo de ese amor
No porque no lo dice lo suficiente
No porque no lo enseñe todos los días
Pero porque no creo en mi misma
No veo lo que usted ve
No escucho lo que usted escucha
Estoy toda rota
En pedazos
Destrozada
En necesidad de milagros
No me veo capaz de hacer algo bien
Una buena para nada
Una imbécil
Cerrada y callada
Soy incapaz de
Hacer
Hablar
Escuchar
Pelear
Soñar
No soy digna de su cariño
I am not worthy of your love
323 · Sep 2019
Always Broken
Lupus- Sep 2019
Nothing can fix me
My love was stolen
I'll always stay in misery
I'll always stay broken
Nothing brings me joy
I can only cry
My life was played as a toy
My life is just a lie
I can't continue
Nothing good survived
If only this wasn't true
My happiness would've never died
286 · May 2020
Inside Me-Part 2
Lupus- May 2020
I show beauty to your eyes
But believe they're all lies
I share hope to all
But let myself fall
I help you forget your pain
But keep it inside my brain
I give you strength to get through
But forget what I've given you

I let myself go down
Preventing you from doing the same
I worry more about you
Because my life is just a game

You have to be safer
I'll keep away the danger
You have to be strong
I'll keep all the wrong
You have to be fair
I'll keep what you can't share
You have to be honest
I'll just keep the rest

To make sure your life is better
I would suffer all pain, if necessary
I'll take in all that kills
The least important thing here is me
I'd prevent you from living my life too
I won't like to see you suffer through
I'll cheer you up when feeling blue
I'll give hints when left with no clue

I would do anything for you
Help you be able to continue
Break down walls and build something new
Because my love for you is true
You would do anything for the ones you love. Sacrifices must be made... for their sake.
275 · Jul 2020
In My Eyes
Lupus- Jul 2020
In my eyes you are perfect
Nothing could ever change that
You have done nothing wrong
Not only an opinion, it's a fact

You may believe otherwise
I know you're filled with insecurities
But I'm here to assure you
And save you from your lies

Why do you only see cruelty
When you have saved many without a fee
You help others get better
Yet you don't let yourself be

Your existence feels like a crime  
You believe you are worth no one's time
There is no value within you
That without you around things would be fine

But you are my time, you are why I fight
Being with you feels so right
I feel safe, loved, and warm in your embrace
I long to hold you all night

And you wonder why I love you so
But I just told you what I feel and what I know
In my eyes you are perfect
And I don't plan on letting you go
In my eyes you are perfect
269 · Nov 2019
Won’t Let You Down
Lupus- Nov 2019
I won’t let you down
In your face there won’t be a frown
You’ll be pleased and proud
Your joy will be loud
Count on me and I’ll do it
Believe in me and I’ll get through it
Just know you could trust me
I’ll be real and show integrity
I’ll make sure things are correct
Things will turn out perfect
I promise things won’t go wrong
Know it was a great idea to trust me all along
255 · Jul 2020
Loving Too Much
Lupus- Jul 2020
You have a pure heart
So tender and so soft
Always putting others first
Before thinking about yourself
I admire that heart of yours
Always able to be nice
No matter who they are
Or what they’ve done

But I’ve grown to dislike it as well
Because you loved too much
You were nice to the wrong people
The ones who didn’t deserve it
But that heart of yours is too strong
There’s nothing anyone could do about
You let no one stop you
From doing what you think is best
So if you think you messed up
Or think you did something wrong
There isn’t really much to say
You did nothing wrong but believe
And if people weren’t capable of seeing that
Then they were either blind
Or too dumb to realize
How much your love is worth

In my eyes you are perfect, strong with your big heart
You are my entire world
But if you don’t want to listen and would like to know where you went wrong
I will tell you this:
The only flaw you’ve ever had
Is your excessive kindness
The only fault you’ve ever had
Is loving too much
I don’t blame you for anything, please don’t blame yourself
254 · Jul 2020
Dissension
Lupus- Jul 2020
It's not good enough
They did it better
Why can't you be like that
You're not clever

               It seems people don't believe in me
               There's no future to see
               What I want can't be
               Because I'm incapable and I agree

     If that's what they think then we'll prove them wrong
     They'll regret what they thought of us all along
     We'll succeed and make them proud
     Smash their words to the ground

People liked them more
Why can't you do the same
You're not doing it right
You're a shame

               I guess I might
               But really not quite
               There's no need to fight
               They are right

     We won't listen to what they have to say
     We're unique in our own way
     We won't be like that, we'll be distinct
     We'll be better than what they expect

               Why do you believe so
               We're useless in every way you know
               We should just let it go
               We'll look like a fool putting on a show

     We should never give up no matter what
     In their words of hatred we won't get caught
     We'll definitely be putting on a performance
     But on how we started off at the bottom
     to being the definition of importance
Which voice inside your head will you listen to?
247 · May 2020
Own Worst Enemy
Lupus- May 2020
Am I the one to blame
For my insecurities and shame?
Do I cause my own pain?
Am I the reason I'm going insane?
Do I allow the pain to enter?
Am I my own offender?
Do I let myself surrender?
What do I do with no defender?

I can feel myself get worse
And yet I don't do anything to change it
I feel how I welcome the curse
And make no attempt to disarrange it

I cannot escape the monsters inside of me
I lost all hope in becoming the kind of person I wanted to be
I smother myself with fears and anxiety
I am my own worst enemy
Your own mind can end up being what hurts you the most... and you don't do anything to make it stop because what's the point, it's the truth. All the hate you show yourself, you deserve it and more
245 · May 2020
Hide Away
Lupus- May 2020
I created distance between me and the rest
Kept myself hidden like a treasure chest
I didn't want anything to do with the outside
I grew distant as my way to hide

I was tired of every single lie
They thought I would buy
Their actions were absurd
Knowing they couldn't keep their word

I lost all trust I ever had
Knowing everything would turn out bad
I lost hope, became paranoid
Anyone who tried to get close I would avoid

I no longer wanted to believe
Just remembering I would grieve
There will never be change
It's nothing new, nothing strange

---

It's a shame
Everyone's the same
Their anger they can't tame
At your heart they will aim

They saw you as a foolish joke
And as they cruelly spoke
Something inside broke
Holding in your tears you choke

The pain created grew
Slowly but surely within you
No longer knowing what to do
You ran away without a clue

You didn't want to stay
In a place harming you every day
Afraid if you trust they will betray
You decided to hide away
All these experiences have taught you to be careful... and have made you doubtful. And now you are more cautious, more afraid that anyone who comes into your life will only hurt you like everyone else has.
244 · Oct 2019
Stay
Lupus- Oct 2019
We can be together
We'll become forever
A dream come true
Alongside you
Please don't leave me
I don't want to be left in agony
If you do, I'd be in need of aid
More insecurities would be made
I need you with me at all times
To get rid of the how's and why's
I need you because when I'm left alone
My heart hardens like stone
I'm scared and afraid
Please stay
219 · Aug 2020
I'll Be Different
Lupus- Aug 2020
Just because one person messed up
     Doesn't mean everyone will
Just because one person let you down
     Doesn't mean I will too
I know you put all your trust in that one person
     I understand you believed
And it won't be easy to heal and forget
     But can you have hope in me
I will help you along the way
     My intentions are real
I'm not here to hurt you
     Can you please begin to trust me
I'll be patient, please take the time needed
     But please don't give up
It's not over just yet
     I promise I'll be different
You've been let down so many times by the people you least expected. You're beginning to lose hope... please don't lose hope
204 · Mar 2019
Why Me
Lupus- Mar 2019
Everything seems to be going wrong
I ask myself "What is going on?"
Nothing ends up being right
Almost everything turns into a fight
No one seems to like me
I'm always left in misery
There seems to be less fun moments
Because everyone else turned out to be my opponents
I wish something good could happen
But happiness is what evil's trappin'
Nothing great is going to happen soon
All I could do is cry every night under the moon
Why do I have to deal with pain?
My broken heart is driving me insane
Why do I always have to use the joyful mask
"Why does this happen to me?" I always ask
I can't take this all
My heart is soon going to break and fall
There's just that one question stuck in my head
And that is "Why me and not someone else instead?"
200 · Dec 2019
Comparing Me
Lupus- Dec 2019
Why am I being compared?
Am I that broken and need to be repaired?
To you do I mean nothing?
Am I even good at anything?
I’m no good
Leaving me unassured
Nothing is right
The truth is so bright
I know everything’s wrong
At night I search for the warmth of a song
I know I’m not worth it
Perfection does not fit
But don’t you see
You’re bringing me pain and misery
Comparing me makes me feel less
It makes me feel like a mess
From the inside I’m dying
About my happiness I’m lying
My heart is breaking apart
Your comparisons are at fault
Comparing me and I’m sinking into depression
Because of your inconsiderate action
All your words attack
And hurt more than a smack
Comparing me and myself I hate
Giving myself no respect, it’s too late
Comparing me and I’m no longer your friend
Bringing me to the end
200 · Jul 2020
I Don't Deserve
Lupus- Jul 2020
I don't deserved to be loved
I don't deserve anything
Worthless and waste of space
I shouldn't receive a thing

There are better people
Yes there are better people around
Why waste time in caring for me
This hopeless corpse lying on the ground

I've hurt too many
And maybe even more than once
Whenever I get close
I'm bound to harm, it's like a curse  

There is so much wrong in me
Mind, body, and soul broken
There is no saving me
My fate has already been chosen

Please don't come near
Avoid the struggle headed your way
Can I at least prevent more pain
If alone I stay?
You don't see any good in yourself, you believe you are better off alone. All you've ever accomplished is hurt those who care about you
191 · May 2020
Inside Me-Part 1
Lupus- May 2020
Whenever you're feeling sad
When all has turned bad
Lost hope deep down inside
I will be by your side

I will open your eyes
Bring back what dies
Help you breathe
Build up your faith

When once again life has given its share
I will be there
When once again life isn't fair
I will be there

I'll help you get up from the ground
Raise you high up when you've decided to go down
I'll help you grow and get stronger
Can't stand seeing you go weak any longer

I'll make you happy
Show you beauty
Bring back daylight
Even at night

I'll become your hero
Me weak? No
Strength is what shows
But yet no one knows
...
When you look inside
You will find
A chaotic mind
I try to hide

No one can see
How I'm not free
What's haunting me
Is not letting me be
You mask up your emotions become the perfect person they need you to be. For their sake you smile your way through the day... even though deep down you feel the complete opposite.
187 · Aug 2019
Live Happily
Lupus- Aug 2019
Live happily, you have to try
Love and care, don't deny
Choose the path to live happily
And a better future you will see
Attempt at a smile every single day
Before you end up pushing everyone away
You have to fight to live better
And live happily forever
182 · Aug 2020
Am I Justified
Lupus- Aug 2020
Am I justified for my suffering
When I live with people
Who have suffered through more
They have greater pain than me
They know the true definition of pain
Of lonely
Of heartbreak
Of disappointment
Of depression
My pain is nothing compared to theirs
Am I justified for my so called suffering
....You don’t know pain like they do....
171 · Jun 2020
All to Myself
Lupus- Jun 2020
I keep it all to myself
Because I don't want to hurt you
I keep it all to myself
So you won't get dragged down too

I stay silent
Whenever I cry
Because you'll worry
Wondering why

You have suffered enough
To have to deal with me as well
So I'll lock myself up
As I go through this hell

I'll tell you I'm fine
When really I'm not
Because why add more
To the problems you've already got

I cry myself to sleep
But when will you know
I make sure on my face
Pain will never show

And it's not that I don't trust you
It's not for who you are
I just don't know how to explain to you
My every scar

I don't know how to tell you about
The pain that I feel
Without hurting you, breaking you
So I'll stay sealed

I don't want to cause anymore pain
For you or for me
I have done enough damage
Caused enough misery
There are just things you cannot share...
147 · Jun 2019
All On Me
Lupus- Jun 2019
All the pressure you put on me
Causes the pain you cannot see
You trust me too much, and I can't take it all
With all that occurs, I feel as I would soon fall
It's not easy to live with all these expectations of yours
The misery in my heart just gets bigger and grows
Your main goal is for me to turn out perfect
But it's hard work to meet with what you expect
I have to be careful with the moves that I make
To make sure they don't seem to be another mistake
I have to keep going, more than what I can do
Only just to be able to please you
For you some things I do isn't right
And with myself alone I just fight
Being who I am isn't good enough, you want more
So now I can't live happily like I used to before
132 · Mar 2020
Reasons
Lupus- Mar 2020
There may be reasons to cry
There may be reasons to fall
But someway, somehow
I'll find a way through it all

There may be reasons to yell
There may be reasons to scream
But I won't let anyone
Dare ruin my dream

There might be reasons to fight
There might be reasons to protect
I'll find all possible ways
To accomplish what I expect

There might be reasons to change
There might be reasons to not be the same
I won't continue playing
Life's little messed up game

I may be getting weak
I may not live any longer
But experiencing all these problems
I'll find a way to get stronger
128 · Aug 2020
Fallen for You
Lupus- Aug 2020
Am I that lonely
That desperate for a friend
But how can I want one
When I'm always doubting what people intend

I'm in need of people to talk to
And you caught my attention
But I've only known you for so long
So I'm taking precaution

You look like an interesting person
Cute and funny and all
So I decided to begin to trust you
Obviously starting off small

I enjoyed your company
You were what I was looking forward to every day
I was getting used to you
But then you decided to go your own way

One day you just never came back
Disappeared unexpectedly
I didn't imagine that to happen
And I began to miss you intensely

I thought I had finally made a friend
Someone who could be my mood
But I realized I hoped too hard
I knew I was *******

I hate myself for doing
What I said I wouldn't do
I hate how I realized too late
I had fallen for you

It's my fault, I know I fell easily
Now that you're gone, I feel lonely once again
There's not one day I'm not thinking about you
Wondering if you'll come back and if so, when?
You opened yourself up again but for what? That person is now gone and you're back to square one... maybe even worse than before
124 · May 2019
Sometimes It's Best
Lupus- May 2019
Sometimes it's best to stay in silence
To be able to hear life's hints
Sometimes it's best to be left alone
To learn to think clearly on your own
121 · Jul 2020
Held on Tight
Lupus- Jul 2020
As hard as I tried
I held onto her as tight as I could
But nothing could stop her
From breaking down in my arms
Her cries were unstoppable
Tear after year streaming down on her face
There seemed to be no end to it
Her body shaking uncontrollably
Her unstable breathing
And I couldn’t do anything to help
I just held on
Tighter than I ever had before
Because I feared
At any moment
Between all those tears
I would lose her
For good
One of your greatest fears...
119 · May 2020
My Whole World
Lupus- May 2020
My ubvob
How much you mean to me
There’s no other future I can see
No other place I’d rather be

Always want to be with you
Together we’ll get through  
Love each other too
More than what we already do

Without you I would walk around blind
You rescue me from my own mind
My purpose and forgiveness you help me find
With your love, the whole world I could grind

You give me strength and power
You bring me up when I get lower
You give me support, my lover
When you promise me forever

I’m glad we were able to fix things
I’m glad we learned to enjoy the good life brings
Instead of suffocating, I claimed you my king
You have committed yourself to be my other wing

Don’t leave me, never let me go
I need you just so you know
I’m not strong as I appear to show
I need to be saved by my hero

Remind me you love me and I will do the same
I will tell the whole world if I could with no shame
Nothing can put out this burning flame
For my heart you have claimed
118 · Jun 2019
Dear Friend
Lupus- Jun 2019
Dear Friend,
There's only one thing I want to let you know
I believe in you and you should never let go
For the ones that you love, you should be very strong
To make them know they were never wrong
Let them know that you will keep on fighting and never rest
Because you're trying your hardest to pass the test
To live with the pain it's hard to move on
But your job here yet isn't done
You're meant to be here and not leave us behind
We all need and love you so keep that in mind.
With lots of love,
...
116 · May 2019
Help Me
Lupus- May 2019
Dear Lord, help me deal with the pain I go through
Let there be a tomorrow and something for me to do
Nobody seems to need or like me anymore
I can no longer see love like I did before
Darkness has finally covered my eyes
Now all I see in front of me are lies
Please, I beg you, help my heart feel okay
So that I could at least live another day
115 · Apr 2020
Run
Lupus- Apr 2020
Run
Run, hurry, don't stop
We can't let our hope drop
There's a future waiting up ahead
Can't turn out dead

Danger lurking around
Stay close to the ground
Don't separate from one another
Just a bit farther

The home left behind
But got to keep it out of mind
Thirst and hunger, there's less energy
No, move on, even if empty

The desert seems endless
Trapped in a tremendous mess
Seems to have no end
Death has become a close friend

Got one injured when fell
Another ill, not feeling well
The number decreases
Left downhearted and in pieces

Heat is killing
Blood is spilling
We have risked it all
We cannot fall
Could this be what goes through immigrants' minds as they cross the border?
113 · May 2020
I Wish It Were All a Dream
Lupus- May 2020
I wish it were all a dream
A fantasy inside my head
So that everything isn't what it seems
For everything to come to an end

This is too much to take
Let it all be fake
There isn't much left to break
But I'm tired of the burn and ache

I can't anymore
I'm not as strong as I was before
It hurts me down to the core
What is there left to fight for

I wish this wasn't real
I'm not enjoying what I feel
It's impossible for me to heal
With the pain I have to face and deal

I see it all deteriorate
The world fills with more hate
Now it's all too late
To be able to change fate

But I wish it were all a dream
A fantasy inside my head
So that everything isn't what it seems
For everything to come to an end
You just wish it wasn't true, it is all unbelievable to have to go through all this suffering. You wish things could heal overnight, but it doesn't seem to work that way. This pain is all to real.
112 · May 2020
Never Again
Lupus- May 2020
Because of people like you
I don't trust anymore
Because of the things you do
I don't believe like I used to before

People like you spend their time lying
You've become experts at it
It causes others to end up drowning
Continuous lies, liars never quit

Every word was cutting through
You were the cause of my fall
But maybe I shouldn't only blame you
Because I was stupid enough to believe it all

At first I didn't want to trust
I knew how humans could be
But I decided to make an exception
Why did I let you get to me?

I hate how it ended up
I regret every moment
For getting my hopes up
But I promise never again
Even though you knew what would happen, deep down you hoped it would be different...but it wasn't. You brought it upon yourself
106 · Jan 2019
A Happy Ending
Lupus- Jan 2019
A happy ending is what we wish for
Love and care given, we want no more
But that time won't always appear
Because pain will always be near
With our problems, we want everything to end
Cheerfully we want to live instead
Can there be no more fights
Because we won't be in peace and won't see the lights
We want to live happy without even trying
With no problems and no purpose for crying
We want to live in a fairy tale to see how it would feel
To live those joyful experiences and make it so real
We want to live a life with no fear
To not be frightened when problems come near
With the ones we love we want to be with forever
To always be happy and live together
Life we only have one
Let's live peacefully before it's done
Can we all have a happy ending
To never live a time so depressing
106 · Sep 2019
Part of Me
Lupus- Sep 2019
My mind is not here
My thoughts are not clear
My words are not right
Creating another fight
Frustration takes over easily
Becoming someone I don't want to be
Then it's not me who acts
Believe me, I'm stating the facts
I don't know what happens until it's done
And then notice what I've lost and won
But it's not my fault
I can tell from the start
It's another part of me deep inside
That is difficult to hide
A part leaving me in doubt
Not knowing what it's all about
A part creating me into a monster
Bringing me pain and torture
This is no lie
A side I can't control even if I try
105 · Apr 2019
I Don't Care
Lupus- Apr 2019
I don't care what you think
Your thoughts won't be able to sink
They'll be gone as fast as a blink
And will disappear with invisible ink
I don't care what you say
In my heart, these words won't stay
Just please go away
I'd rather live during the sunny day
I don't care what you do
I just want to stay away from you
Leave me alone because you don't see what I go through
Everyone deals with pain and maybe even you too
I don't care about you, so leave me alone
Because one day those mean comments can reach deep into my bone
That's why I'm telling you to stay away from the no-touch zone
For, away I don''t want my happiness to be thrown
105 · Apr 2019
No One
Lupus- Apr 2019
No one is there for me
No one is there to see
No one has my soul's door key
No one knows who I can really be
102 · Mar 2019
Loving Myself
Lupus- Mar 2019
Loving yourself is the best you could do
And I know because I have seen it too
Caring for yourself should be the first thing to come to mind
Leaving all the problems behind
Yes everyone else matters
And to think for others shows good manners
But sometimes you have to come first
Think about yourself before you get worse
Sometimes you think no one likes you
But that's not close to being true
The problem is that you haven't learned to love yourself yet
Solve it and imagine all the confidence you'll get
Including you, everyone is worth a lot
Think of that when you're heart feels like a knot
Nothing about you is wrong
Believe me, that has been the truth for so long
Maybe everyone says you're worth nothing
But you should know you're worth something
So prove them wrong by appreciating yourself
And always reminding them their error by saying "At least I started loving myself"
102 · Apr 2020
Because of You
Lupus- Apr 2020
Because of you I'm suffering
Because of you I'm dying
Because of you I'm falling apart
Because of you I take no part

My life is a complete mess
With some hope, maybe less
With no future, I guess
A life full of stress

I'm left dead
With the words you said
Stuck in my head
Keeping me awake in bed

Nothing left to do
Just remembering you
Words stabbing through
It's nothing new

You've caused so much pain
The memories driving me insane
Tormenting my brain
My eyes tired of making it rain

For no one to see
My world full of misery
I keep people far away from me
I'm better off lonely

No need to see this mistake
My happiness is a fake
Though steps I need to take
To improve and no longer break

But how can something torn apart
Be able to restart?
Left with a broken heart
Where does it start?
After being told so many things, being brought down, you feel helpless and lost. You don't know what else to do. You've lost all motivation to continue or heal.
Lupus- Mar 2019
Who doesn't want to be loved?
The answer is nobody
But why is love always getting shoved
Is it because some people don't want to live happily
Maybe people like to act strong
To prove that they're not weak
But without love how can someone live for so long?
You can't because it's what we all seek
Many people try to reject love again and again
Obviously, it's not at all the love's fault
It's their pride they want to protect and defend
They just don't want to end up with a soft heart
We all want love whenever our faces are full of tears
And we want it to appear pretty soon
We want love when we're forced to deal with our fears
But sometimes people try to hide their true feelings behind the happy tune
It doesn't matter what anybody does to try to hide their true feelings
It's obvious we want love all the time
Our actions aren't the same and all have different meanings
But one similarity we share is we all want happiness to shine
99 · Apr 2019
When Something Goes Wrong
Lupus- Apr 2019
When something goes wrong
You cry for so long
When something isn't right
Your heart feels so tight
98 · Dec 2019
I Need to Know
Lupus- Dec 2019
I worry for what will happen
Something will go wrong but when?
I worry for what is going on
Will everything shatter and be gone?
Something is not right
It’s obvious and visible as light
But no one wants to tell me
Why not if I have eyes to see
I need to be told everything
And it better not be lying
Don’t be “protective” and be fair
I need to be aware
I have to be informed
Of everything that has occurred
No secrets should be left
Don’t turn the truth to a quest
No reality should be hidden
Answers concealed are forbidden
I’m begging for the truthfulness
Maybe there won’t be a bigger mess
I need to know the situation
Leaving me no question
98 · Feb 2019
With No Hope
Lupus- Feb 2019
My heart was broken
My happiness was stolen
I can't continue
This can't be true
Everything is ruined
The beautiful world was polluted
Nothing can hold on
Everything is going wrong
In this damaged world no one can stay alive
There's no way to survive
No one can live with the big mistake
It's too much to take
Nothing is going right
One single thing turns into a fight
Everything is a problem
And with them I go down to the bottom
Nothing is going the way I want it to
These tough situations, I can't go through
And because all these things changed
With no hope I stayed
96 · Feb 2019
Letting Me Down
Lupus- Feb 2019
I trusted you very much
But you payed me back with a punch
I had lots of hope in you
But in your mind, that didn't go through
You didn't care what you did to me
Neither did you care about your destiny
All your actions were only wrong
You didn't care of what was going on
From you I was expecting the best
But instead, you showed me the worse
You really let me down
And made me look like a joke, like a clown
You ruining your life is my worst fear
And everyday that seems to be more near
I don't want you to end badly
But you prefer to be lonely
I worry for you but you don't care
And what you're doing isn't really fair
You're getting worse instead of getting better
I want you to turn good but that won't happen ever
You promised me that you'll keep trying
But like always, you kept lying
Letting me down was the worst you could've done
Now you've lost the trust that you have once won
95 · Jun 2020
Perdón
Lupus- Jun 2020
Le pido perdón
No merezco su amor
Por todo lo que he causado
Por todo el dolor
Yo tomo toda la culpa
Porque usted confiaba en mi
Y le quede mal
Es corto y pequeño ... pero la culpa es tan grande.
It’s short and small... yet the guilt is so huge
95 · Oct 2019
Crazy & So Dumb
Lupus- Oct 2019
Am I really that crazy
To deny love that easily
To reject it as if it was nothing
When to me it means everything
Something I have wished for
To be present in my life more
But when it finally decides to come
I push it away and choose to be lonesome
Sometimes I think I have no brain
Because instead of joy, I choose pain
Sometimes I feel I am not smart
For denying what I feel in my heart
The deep sadness burns like fire
A sense of stability I cannot acquire
For being so dumb I listened to my fears
Now lonely I wipe away my own tears
94 · Dec 2019
Life is Ruined
Lupus- Dec 2019
Life is ruined now
Maybe we know the how
Life is not the same
Maybe I’m to blame
Something went wrong
Bringing pain so strong
Something messed up
Bomb decided to blow up
Was it all my fault?
Am I the culprit of the assault?
Am I meant to be here?
Did I bring in the fear?
Is this all true?
Could I continue?
Is it the end?
Would it be okay again?
We reached the finish line
Things won’t be fine
No more chances
Worst circumstances
We’re done for
Misery there will be more
No more joy I can guarantee
Life is ruined all because of me
Next page