Life is ruined now
Maybe we know the how
Life is not the same
Maybe I’m to blame
Something went wrong
Bringing pain so strong
Something messed up
Bomb decided to blow up
Was it all my fault?
Am I the culprit of the assault?
Am I meant to be here?
Did I bring in the fear?
Is this all true?
Could I continue?
Is it the end?
Would it be okay again?
We reached the finish line
Things won’t be fine
No more chances
Worst circumstances
We’re done for
Misery there will be more
No more joy I can guarantee
Life is ruined all because of me

I lied to protect you
So the happiness could continue
I lied so that the fights could end
And we could all become friends
I thought I was doing what was right
I thought I could prevent another fight
But I was wrong and nothing got better
It seems as if the pain would last forever
I didn't want to lie though
My pride was very low
I just didn't want to see you suffer anymore
Seeing you cry caused my heart to be sore
I didn't want to witness anymore of your depression
I tried to keep you under my protection
When telling you the truth I felt useless
I only created a bigger mess
So instead of being honest I created a lie
I couldn't with it. I couldn't look at you in the eye
But I was left no other choice
If I wanted to hear joy in your voice
At that moment I saw a better future
A home nicer and newer
But just like my lies, it wasn't real
The storm came back to destroy and steal
Nothing could prevent it, even as hard as I tried
There seemed to be only one solution, so again I lied
Please forgive me, I regret my actions
I only tried to look for solutions
Is it possible you could forgive me
For messing up when trying to create a better destiny
Would you forgive me when understanding my reason
To try to make things more peaceful and fun
I'm very sorry for something I didn't want to occur
I know I didn't fix anything, instead I showed failure
I hope you'll forget my responses that were fake
I hope you won't remember my mistake
I'm telling you "I'm sorry" with all my heart
Can we leave all this behind and restart
Would you begin to love me once again
After I failed to protect you and defend
Hopefully you'll forgive me soon
Until then, I'll be waiting under the stare of the moon
I don't want you or me to be left alone
Even though your trust towards me isn't as strong
I'll repeat "I'm sorry" over and over
Even if it doesn't bring us any closer
It doesn't matter if you don't talk to me
Just know I regret what I did and I'm sorry

I don't want to become that person
I don't want to be anything like that one
It's the last thing I want to be
The last thing I want to see in me
I'm not that person , not one bit
These personalities just don't fit
Nothing similar between the two
There are differences in what we do
You can't say we are alike
Because I'll tell you that's not right
I don't know what you see through those eyes
But they are complete lies 

oR aT leAsT yOu fOrCe yoUrSelF tO beLieVe tHaT 
YoU fOrcE iT tO bE tRuE 
YOuRe tHe oNe wHO cReAteS thE liES 
yOU dOnt wAnt tO sEe tHe rEAl yOu 
iLL lEt yOu kNOw tHeRes NotHInG thAT sEpeRaTes tHe tWo oF YoU 
nOtHinG tO mAkE yOU sliGhtLy diFFerEnT 
tHeY lOoK iNtO tHe MiRror 
aNd yOu wiLL bE tHeiR rEfleCtioN 

No that can't be, you can't be for real 
Because it's not what I feel 
Just like the hot and the cold 
We're different, I mean that's what I've been told 

eVeN yOU beGiN tO dOubT 
yOu kNow YoUrE boTh tHe sAmE 
yOU weRe molDed fRoM tHe sAMe clAy 
YoU bOTh bUrN fRoM tHE sAmE fLamE

Life is exhausting
Life is to live and make
Seems to be another mistake
Life doesn't always seem to be worth it
Getting you tired and making you want to quit
Life doesn't always seem to be a big thing
Problems it only seems to bring
Life doesn't look like a lot of fun
Making it feel as if you've never won
Life seems to be ruined and is only jail
Filled with mistakes and epic fails
But that's only a part
It has only been the start
There's always an ending and then a continue
The end has not been the answer for you
Problems and pain will go away
You will live another day
The happiness will soon come back
The agony won't continue to attack
The end is not yet to come
You will not leave anyone lonesome
Life can hurt and can bring you down
But take your sadness and leave it in the ground

I need a hug now
But from where and how
There’s no one who could
And no one who would
I just feel so alone
Trapped inside these four walls of stone
Having no one to save me
And set me free
If there’s nobody, then
Where would the hug come from and when
I just need a hug so tight
Helping me stay alive and feel right
Hopefully there’d be someone
To come and do what has to be done
Somebody who’d save me from my emptiness
And from creating my life into a mess
I just want a hug to let me know
That I’m being loved and won’t be let go
A hug that would bring me back a smile
Leaving me happy, longer than just a while

I need you to stay
Present everyday
Helping me find the way
Making everything okay

Don't leave me behind
Let's discover, let's find
My peace, the kind
To keep me in a stable mind

Don't ever let me go
Encourage me to grow
I need to know
What to say and what to show

Keep me by your side
All broken inside
I could die
I'm in need of your guide

We've been together for so long
There's so much more to be done
More memories to be won
You can't leave, you can't be gone

I won't be the same
For success I won't aim
I'd lose in every game
You'd be filled with shame

But I won't do it on purpose
Without you I'd feel lost
Trapped, even cursed
I need you so I won't get any worse

Never contented of my accomplishments
Never pleased with the compliments
Never satisfied with what I did
Never proud of your kid

Nothing I do is enough for you
I do my absolute best
Yet I always fail the test
Your expectations are unreachable
And I am never capable

All I do and say is wrong in every way
I am only made up of mistakes
One small error and everything breaks
Disappointed by what I said
Apparently my brain is dead

My goal never to come whole
What you say is what matters
Stuck in my head are your words
Everything else is a distraction
Bringing you no satisfaction

All my dreams are impossible it seems
My wishes aren't real
My hope you steal
Your words are what I worry most about
Putting my personal life in doubt

Happiness I denied
I'm left dead inside

Yes I know I understand
You're just lending me a hand
But you're also tearing me apart
So strict and so harsh, I can't move from the start

Failure is what you think you're going to meet
But success is what you're going to greet
Nothing should stop you from accomplishing your goal
Nothing should hurt your heart or your soul
But if you do come across something that doesn't let you keep going
Then try to ignore it and keep on moving
I'm telling you, it's the only possible way
To move on through another day
Don't stop believing in yourself. Trust
You need to keep going. You have to. You must
Make your success sound very loud
Because ignoring it won't make yourself feel proud.

Sometimes when I'm alone I think "What would life be without me?"
My answer would be "Maybe others would live more happily"
Or "I belong and deserve to be here"
But the true answer is my greatest fear
For I don't want to know what would life be if I were dead
Neither would I want to know what other things could've been thought or said
I was put here to always stay
And never ever would I go away

Take life seriously, don't play around
Don't leave your dreams lying on the ground
Use your life for something useful
So that your ending could be beautiful
Create something good out of you
Make your purpose real and true
Make yourself feel proud
Take your pride and make it sound loud
Don't become a reckless one
Because one day your life will be done

Perfect, we have to be perfect
For others to be pleased
No mistakes are allowed
Errors aren't what they need

Similar, we have to be similar
There can't be any difference
We all have to be alike
Unique loses, reputation wins

Smart, we have to be smart
They won't accept a dumb one
We got to have their smart ideas
A mind as powerful as the sun

They want us to be a certain way
For others to notice we're here today
A perfect image of us all
Showing how we never fall

Prevent the rumors and the gossip
Hide the scars from when we trip
Making us create and show
A new person we don't know

We have to follow their rules
We can't look like fools
We have to obey their orders
We can't create any disorders

They decide what we need to be
They decide what they want to see
They would do what others agree
But what about me?

The person behind me
Preventing any fall
There making sure
I get over it all
Never looking back
Forgetting the past
Moving on
And moving fast
Pushing me forward
Passing the limits
Never backing down
Placing my foot where it fits

The person beside me
Providing some advice
The person to prevent
A mistake from occurring twice
Not allowing there to be
Any distractions
Keeping me on the path
Following all directions
Never leaves my side
Always watching over
Never abandoning me
Always being there

The person in front of me
Keeping my eyes
Straight forward
Imagining the prize
Seeking for the best
Helping create a better future
Allowing no stops
Even under the pressure
Pulling me away
From what I leave behind
Leading me to my dreams
The ones I keep in mind

Without them what would I do
How would I continue
How would I go through
I need them to move on, don't you?

A dream is to keep and to never let go
Even if it looks impossible and goes very slow
Here, hope is the main key
To be able to accomplish your destiny
A dream should grow bigger and stronger
So that it could last a lot longer
But giving up only causes it to be weak
And the endings won't be as happily as someone would seek
A dream is yours and only belongs to you
So choose wisely on what you're going to do
Because a dream could break apart very easily
And no one wants that because we all want to live happily
A dream is unique and very important
It's what someone believes in and that is it
It's not easy to believe on something for a very long time
Patience can reach up as weak as a thin line
A dream can never be changed that's for sure
However it can be erased, but it could be a lot of torture
Never give up on a dream
It can bring good luck, even as impossible as it may seem

You weren't the cause of someone else's fight
Or that someone didn't know what was right
Don't think it was your fault
That people grew apart
Or that someone gave up in life
Too painful to handle the sharp knife
Stop making yourself feel guilty
For the past remaining in your memory
All of those things you did not cause
Before you start hating yourself pause
Don't feel ashamed for anything you didn't do
Problems erupted, but not because of you

All you know how to do is make fake promises
Killing me as if you were one of the deadliest diseases
You made promises but was always lying
With every promise my trust started dying
You were never able to keep your word
Ending with a sorry. How many times was that heard?
Made one promise after another
Now I could tell the future
Nothing changes, everything’s the same
Living the same life, playing the same game
Every time ending the same way
In the same position we always stay

The mask I wear
To show I care
The mask I use
Whenever I lose
It's meant to help me pretend
To live and get farther from the end
To make everything seem to be fine
And not make it obvious that I'm running out of time
I don't want people to see what I hold inside
Wearing the mask is how everything would hide
To keep a smile and not start crying
Is how no one would find out that I'm dying
I don't need more people to think I'm useless
That I'm a good for nothing and only a mess
I wear the mask to forget my mistakes
Lying is all it takes
I wish I didn't have to do this every day
Not having to hide my feelings in any way
To show my face and not use the mask
Peace and no judgement is all I ask
I would rather have people see me as a joyful person
And not see my heart scarred and broken
If I could put away the true me
Then I'm willing to use the mask to hide my real identity

I will try, not to cry, not to lie
I will do what I must
My heart won't turn to dust
To keep on living
No longer dying
I have to stand
Grab a hold of a hand
To not fall apart
And go back to the start
I will do my best
To finish this quest
To move on from this pain
Hoping to not go insane
I won't stop, I won't drop, I will reach the top
I'll learn from my mistakes
As long as it takes
I will grow in my own way
To survive another day
I pray to stay strong
For nothing to go wrong
To not deal with more fails
Live a life like in the fairy tales
When I reach success
I might forget I'm worthless
But until then I'll keep working
I'll make sure I keep moving
I will fight, to bring light, in my sight
I might give up, i may shut up
It may seem my life would end
But I will try, not to cry, not to lie again

You were left all alone, all broken up, yes that's true
But that doesn't mean you can't continue
There's a whole life ahead just waiting
A future better than just crying
Keep walking ahead, don't stop
You're injured but you'll heal and work non-stop
Nothing should stop you from moving on
Life is still continuing meaning you're not done

Why think twice
If you're sure you're not in doubt
Why think twice
If you know what you're talking about
Why think twice
If you know where your heart will belong
Why think twice
If you want your life to last for so long

You know what you decide and know what is real
Because you're pretty sure you know how you feel
You have no doubt in what you're saying
And know exactly what you're doing

Why think twice
If you know you want to love
Why think twice
If you know that care you don't want to shove
Why think twice
When there's nothing to re-think
Why think twice
If you know the truth is so heavy it could sink

There's no need to think twice if you know what you're doing
If you're sure that you won't end up losing '
Once you decide you should know that there's no way back
Your decision should be very strong and should never show a crack

Why think twice
When you know the result would be good
Why think twice
If it would cause you to be in the best mood
If you know what you're doing then you should hurry up and not move slow
If you're determined, then you should never let that person go

Why does life have to be so hard
You can never be happy like you write on a card
There are problems always running around
You have no hope left, you can just cry on the ground
Sadness is what you feel every single day
You don't have good thoughts and no spirit to play
You feel alone with no one to talk to
There's no one to listen or to understand you
Can there ever be a time when you're feeling alright
When your heart isn't pounding and feeling so tight
Would there ever be a time when you won't feel so guilty
When your soul isn't so hurt and awfully filthy
But I'm losing hope that that time would ever appear
And we're all going to be living in days full of fear
Would someone come and help us when we need it
Or would they leave us alone in the deep dark pit
Why in life do we have to suffer
So that our hopes and spirits can go under
With all our hard lives we go through
There is nothing much in the world left to do

Start appreciating more
Than what you've done before
Start showing some care
Treat your loved ones fair
Don't worry about the stuff you want and are missing
Or the things that you are hoping for and are wishing
Think about the stuff you already have and worry
You might be left all alone making you feel sorry
Be thankful that you at least have something
Not like others who have nothing
Be glad of the stuff you own
And that you at least have a home
You say you deserve more but you don't
You're not loving what you have, so getting more you won't
What you possess, the ones you got
Those who remain by your side are worth a lot
You continue to push everyone away
May it not be too late when you admit it and realize
Selfishly you led yourself to darkness and isolation
Soon everyone will be vanishing before your eyes

There was a time where I used to live
There was a time where my love I would give
There was a time where I had no struggles
There was a time where care wouldn't have tangles
But all that changed
The love has just been mazed
To find it, it's terribly hard
It's between hundreds of guards
There was a time where I had no worries
There was a time where I had happy stories
There was a time where I had belief in real families
There was a time where I had no tragedies
But everything is not the same
My life is now filled with lots of pain
I need a guide, help me please lord
My life has just been stabbed by a sharp sword
There was a time where I would be kind
and that doesn't pass through anyone's mind
There was a time where I would care
But everything's done, there's nothing to share

Things happen because that's how it was decided
Stories begin after others have ended
There's always a reason for things to occur
Reasons that we can't always choose or ignore
Sometimes we have no control over situations
Moments are created not always because of our actions
Things happen because it was meant to be
To create a future that we would soon see

I write poems because it helps me let go of what I hold inside
It's almost like a diary writing down my thoughts and what I decide
It's fun creating words out of my feelings
To write down many sentences having similar and different meanings
I write to forget the terrible moments I lived just a few minutes before
I write to remember those happy moments and to wish for more
I write all about life, others or mine
Either it's a positive or negative time
I write about the dreams that I have and my wishes too
But I also write about the pain that I go through
I get inspired by quotes and lyrics from a song
Talking about what I think is right and what I feel is wrong
There are so many reasons for why I write
It could be to escape from another big fight
Or because it takes a lot of creativity and is so much fun
But the main reason is because I feel as if I'm good at something, at least one

Why can't anybody see
Different, I want to be
No one should be similar
Me only, no other
I want to be unique, made in my own way
Have different ideas to share and say
Why be someone who already exists
To not be part of the similar list
I don't want to repeat a story
I'd rather create new history
I could create my own situations
Have different and new conversations
I want to be known as my own person
With my heart in pieces and broken
I want to be myself and not look fake
Can't anybody understand for goodness sake
Why can't anybody see
Different I want to be

There it is again, the red in my arm
Crying out red tears because of the harm
What's left after all this is a scar
A reminder of what has happened so far
People tell me it shouldn't be done
But yet there's always another one
Something always happens at the end
Bringing back my dear old friend
Either a line or a shape, but always a mark
Representing the misery visible even in the dark
A story behind each whenever it appears
Caused by my sorrow or any of my fears
The red in my arm, what I love and hate to see
The relief, the punishment both showing up to me
People think it's the idea of suicide
But really it's the tears I hold inside
I'm finally able to let go of my pain
Though from hurting myself what do I gain
It's my only way of escape
Whenever I lose my hope
Sometimes I regret my actions
My thoughts, my decisions
But it's the only way to make me feel better
The red in my arm makes me feel stronger