"unhelpful" poems
Limbs littered the earth, her negligee no longer lay in his soldier’s
world; he would do anything to smell her perfume
once more. What day was it? Ahhh…Monday,
the perfect first date, a moon-
lit walk on a beach. He felt like a train
about to crash and nobody was dancing.
She felt alien alone in their home. Dancing
was impossible and she stared at the photo, a soldier’s
face, not his own. Limbo was a train
journey that never ended. Billboards advertising perfume
and the never ending sun, the never ending moon.
The name of the days changed but Monday
was no different from Tuesday or last Monday.
She wondered if disabled people thought dancing
ridiculous. He could return disabled…the moon
was full tonight, she wondered if he in his soldier’s
uniform would be admiring it remembering her perfume
and not side stepping dead bodies feeling like a train
wreck. How many poor driver’s of trains
were haunted by suicides, faces looming out, the Monday
blues? And some women will never afford perfume
and would never be taken out dancing,
it did not console her. She was one of thousands of soldier’s
wives all gazing wistfully at the unhelpful moon.
She dreams of werewolves howling at the moon,
of him passing through a dark forest on a train
coming back to her, having thrown his soldier’s
gun, stamped in the mud, rejected. But she was the gun, Monday
and no letter had come and her nerves were dancing,
she knocked over her most expensive bottle of perfume.
He was dead, she would never replace the perfume.
She would smash bottles sticking her tongue out at the moon
throwing herself around in life, dancing
like a boat in a storm, occasionally consider suicide by train
but she would never do it. Saturday, Sunday, Monday
all days trooped past like the heavy march of a soldier.
The word soldier stank of cheap perfume and
everything was mundane especially the moon.
People hurry her by like late trains, only a few whirl past dancing.
Jun 12, 2010
Jun 12, 2010 at 4:10 PM UTC
As I flit from A to B - Candleford to Larkrise
Laurieston to Gatehouse of Fleet
I flit, spit from A to B
Calling all Bluebells
assist me in my move -11th May, '11
Let Fairy Fawn be fair and true
and pure with humility
For his Fairy Lu - La Fee Lu
could get so blue
if he is not on time
All praises Bluebells
He is here
T'was but a year since
I'd wished upon a
Castramond Bluebell
in April 2010
And now we sit in utter Bliss
Ensonced in historical Dunblane
Fairy Fawn paints on and on
And I just sit, dismiss
All negativity, anything dark
I know that light will disperse the unhelpful hearse
darkness, death and dour ways
Disolve in the sun this late spring morn
Let Bees Browse among the Heather Blooms
Like love now maturing from twenty-eight days to a year and day
4th of the 4th 2012
May 5, 2012
May 5, 2012 at 6:17 AM UTC
It's a shame how you must have aspired me to become the child you always wanted
in the months and days before I was born,
before reality had its chance to construct the person I would become.
when the happy news was first heard of a new child in a new world,
who would be brave and cheerful and kind
and above all sporty,
the kind that would make an impression,a born leader and dutiful follower
a proud patron of the family name.
We would have much in common and I would remind you of yourselves
at such an impressionable age
and I would achieve all you had hoped for.
But perhaps this is the great tragedy that parents stumble upon in this constant letdown of a life.
You were lucky that I was an easy child,never keeping you up at night and never causing trouble,
but the fact that I was lazy,introspective,morbid,
cowardly,unattentive,unhelpful,bookish,obsessive,
uninvolving and unsatisfied
made me realise how much I must have let you down.
I sigh too much,I read too much,I'm so full full of sarcasm that I cannot take anything seriously,
I never want to be the focus of attention,I never eat enough,I dont care about trends,
I dont care if people comprehend me.
I must be impossible to love.
Thats why I have decided to never have children.
They could never be what I would expect of them.
I could never love someone who I was ultimately responsible for,
someone who I could indoctrinate into my own idea of happiness.
Jun 28, 2012
Jun 28, 2012 at 2:53 PM UTC
In a long happy marriage
Sometimes bedtime grows stale
Once toe curling *** fades
As libidos doth fail.
We both have tough jobs
And two kids of our own.
Sad, we both want to sleep
When we’re finally alone
The man at the store
Said “I have just the thing.
You really should try it-
makes your *** life take wing!”
It wasn’t a **** flick
Or a blue pill to swallow,
Just a tiny transmitter
to hide in her pillow.
At night, as she slept,
The salesman explained
My subliminal message
would be fed to her brain.
With her passions inflamed
She would turn to her mate
Like the once nubile bride-
Leave the rest up to fate.
So I made a recording
With a saucy suggestion
Then looked forward to bedtime
hoping for the res-errection.
My bride’s a deep sleeper,
(A good thing since I snore)
The tape’s played two weeks now
And I still haven’t scored.
I completely was baffled
That salesman assured
That no “wood” would go wasted
No ***** ignored.
Instead every night
About two thirty nine
I’d slip off to the bath
Where the “beat” would go on
I resolved to return
The unhelpful device
Before the guarantee ended
And I’d be out the price
Imagine my shock,
imagine my dread
When I found the transmitter
in my pillow instead!
Seems my wife had decided
To play with my head:
“Honey, go f8ck yourself,
If you wake me, you’re dead.”
Sep 7, 2013
Sep 7, 2013 at 10:05 AM UTC
Today is one of those days
My mind has sooooo much clutter
I don't know where to even begin
My table I sit, staring blankly at my notebook
Waiting for some sort of words to come out
But blank the paper still stays
Sloppy words, quite unhelpful, I mutter
It's so loud in my head, I wish you could listen
My eyes glaze over when into the clouds I look
Thoughts going floating all about
& truly I reassured you that my words are quite real
& tell you how high my anxiety level rose
My attention spans is worse than a hyper active, strung out crack addict
Who is in Walmart's clearance section
Up & down up & down sliding clothes back & forth over five times
Sometimes things feel so surreal
Almost like a mirage I suppose
**** every two minutes there I wander off distracted
If it doesn't catch my interest quick, then it's see ya later attention
.....ooooh glitter, shiny sparkles oh so pretty wind chimes
Well that helped unblock my daze
My mind just needed to choose where to start
It was something in the clouds that ignited a brain spark
& all of sudden my mind was like "where are my pens?"
No more distant stares, sitting in front of blank paper
.....ooooooweeeee.... Goodness I really gotta remember to blink during my gaze
Yes, that would've been smart
Then maybe every blink wouldn't open up so heavily dark
& I could clearly walk without blindly step by step suspense
I am just a day dreamer kinda creator
Jul 6, 2014
Jul 6, 2014 at 8:26 AM UTC
Come Glastonbury, demand your suitors
Eliminate the negatives of their days
Show the signs of cheer and promise
Crystal clear and sun bright
The walkways between the tiny shops
Where escaping through to back doors and out
Inside spirits claim your soul
Wrestle your pathetic reliance on consumerism
Your slavish concern for fashion
And your unhelpful TV dinners
There in Glastonbury only truth is spoken
Revealing the weaknesses of our human frame
Our minds that suffer from prejudices and bigotry
Cleanse your soul, become yourself
Give up the senseless living that has dominated
And driven our daily chores and lifestyle
Discard them all and believe that man
Is just a tiny part of this cosmos
A spirit and energy of the completeness
Not the embodiment
Not the utmost but a small part
Perhaps a much lesser being than any other...
Despite everything we are special
You are special in your individual capabilities
Each soul a grain of stardust
Waiting to be reunited in the cosmos
With the rest of the wonderful plethora
Be calm in the knowledge that you
Your heart and soul
Are one and only
Unique
Even today in Glastonbury
Apr 23, 2012
Apr 23, 2012 at 8:48 AM UTC
The parrot has 3 billion neurons in its brain
We have 86 billion
And most of mine are busy
forming unhelpful pathways
Misleading my good intentions.
Still, 3 billion neurons
seems like enough room for a few
unruly pathways
The parrot can repeat phrases
Which we thought to be
pretty cool
So we trapped him
and put him in a cage
And in our living rooms
Alone
The parrot knows how to survive happily
Within his world
Within his world, with 30 others of his kind
And a partner for life.
In his world
he would fly with his flock
To trees to pick fresh fruit
Now he perches on his own
And picks dry fruit out of a bowl.
In his world
he would prune his partners feathers
He would look after her
And she him
Now he perches on his own
And prunes his feathers
until there are none left.
Its an unhelpful neuro pathway, you see?
Some form of OCD?
Maybe its a way to cope?
Maybe its the brain spiralling
Trying to figure out what to do
Because it can't be a parrot anymore
It has to learn to be a toy
A talking point
And the parrot doesn't know how to be that
He only knows how to be a parrot
Nov 5, 2020
Nov 5, 2020 at 12:42 PM UTC
Panic, panic, panic,
An ecstasy of fear-
What’s wrong with you, don’t you realise your family are near?
My mind is manic-
And all you can say is oh dear?
Can u ever just be here?
Help me with this fear?
Help, that’s all I need to end this paralysing fear,
Not your unhelpful, fault-finding sneer.
Oct 2, 2020
Oct 2, 2020 at 12:20 PM UTC
if you are missing him, remember this. remember how cruel he was to you, how every time he drove away the moonlight made your skin look bruised, it made you feel soft. remember that you are not. you might break but you will always heal. think of the nights where he turned away and refused to let you touch him, nights where he moaned your best friends' names into your mouth while you tried to prove how much you loved him, nights where he'd refuse to stop yelling until you put your hands on him. do not think of his hands, or his mouth, or any of the bones in his body. they're not for you. they're not for anybody but himself and you should pity the fact he doesn't know how to love them. you gave your best to him and he crumpled it up until it looked like your worst. don't feel sorry for being emotional, he was a gaping wound in your chest and things like that deserve a good cry. if you're missing him, remember how distant he was, how when you'd sink down on him he wouldn't be looking at your face. how his shoes were always graffitied with the numbers of other girls. how in the middle of a date he asked another girl her name. I know it hurts, it's going to be okay, I promise. remember how unhelpful he was? how little he cared, moving so fast he could never type the 'I?' he blamed you for loving him too much, for being too sad: both things were his fault. I know it doesn't seem like it but I promise there is somebody much, much more lovely, somebody who will treat you like a cloud, and won't throw a fit when you start to rain. you just have to wait.
Jun 24, 2015
Jun 24, 2015 at 4:23 PM UTC
Offence has no real validity,
Yet it is used to justify the taking of lives
Is there one, that the world does not offend
If so that person has not lived or felt,
Warlords, rapists, racists, murderers and those who are cancers on society walk among us daily
Those who profess to know the will of god and act on his behalf,
Perceiving and executing unhelpful dogma that infects our reality
The words respect and correctness have become harbingers for cowards,
As our muteness silently strips us of our freedom,
Apologies are offered gift wrapped in fear
Sticks and stones still break our bones but pictures and words now **** us**
Jan 7, 2015
Jan 7, 2015 at 8:26 PM UTC
You can really hurt yourself
If you hold your breath too long,
Headaches and dulled vision,
Part way to passing out with enough
Determination,
Add water and depth and a swift rise,
The bends as bubbles of gas
Form in unhelpful places,
Or swam too deep too far
And barely making the surface
That suddenly seems so far
From my feebly flapping limbs,
I guess we have all held
Our breath across the years,
Waiting on some thing or someone
To finally come good,
Or arrive or even just to be,
Somehow or somewhere or somewhen,
Breath suspended,
Life on hold just waiting with
Inextinguishable hope
Of something good,
And precious,
Worth waiting for,
Well I know I have,
And I know I have been the one,
The thing and or the circumstance
That has caused breath to be held,
And to my shame not always
Was I worth it,
But now - actually it is me with bursting lungs,
And the pain is near unbearable,
Perhaps time to let out that air with
A loud and pain filled gush,
To turn and start the swim
To shore
Some dreams are never meant
To be
Jan 25, 2024
Jan 25, 2024 at 6:08 PM UTC
Let me write a sad limerick
Pouring out emotions from a skin so thick
Inking the pale page of no memories
Let me blow on it some gusty breeze
Let me write a sad limerick.
Let me write a sad limerick
Of my well being which sounds so sick
Hours of speculation make me famished
But I can't eat, my hunger has vanished
Let me write a sad limerick.
Let me write a sad limerick
I have a wall around built from dark brick
The trapped painful lonesome feelings
Tear me more, less healing
Let me write a sad limerick.
Let me write a sad limerick
You make me sadder you unhelpful *****
Leave my life, don't you see
There is no one that you can change me?
Let me write a sad limerick.
Let me write a sad limerick
Sick and tired of my mind's tricks
I want revenge then I'll be free
If I make him bleed I won't disagree
Let me now stop this limerick.
Apr 30, 2015
Apr 30, 2015 at 1:27 PM UTC
The sun is down
It's been down for a while
and while she hasn't said outright,
we think it might
be a power play
for a perceived lack of praise
The sun is down
We have been discussing
ways to raise her spirits
without out and out worship
(which would set
an unhelpful precedent)
And so we start with a song
A homage, thanking her
A call, asking her to rise and smile
And it only takes a child sacrifice
once, twice and thrice
to coax her back - a small price,
and before long she's her old delight
and we tell ourselves it's not worship
it's just the just payment due
based on the new tarrifs
for light and heat
and the cost of living
in this solar energy
over dependancy
greener economy
May 15, 2022
May 15, 2022 at 2:53 PM UTC
And Just Me.
No clichés…
No humor…
No pretending…
Just Nita without the famous mask talking to you
And you know who you are, if you’re still here, and if you read this
(however, if you read this and you even think it’s you, but it isn’t then it probably applies to you – so yeah, then I’m talking to you too)
Last night I cried for you…
I cried for you and I cried for me…
I cried for all of us.
I cried for all of the hardship & pain you have had to endure in this life,
I cried at the unfairness of it all.
I cried for all the kids and adults who were damaged beyond repair
By the people who were supposed to love them the most.
I cried because you trusted me enough to reach out to me
I cried because I wasn’t sure what to do to help.
It broke my heart to hear you say that no one loves you
And to know that you really believe you are bad and unlovable.
I know you’re scared
I know you hurt
I know that you think there is only one way out of the all-consuming pain.
I believe you when you say you can’t do it anymore.
I know you feel that way.
I know because I feel that way too.
I know about all of those things.
What I don’t know is how to help you get through it.
How to make it okay for you.
For any of us.
I care about you.
I love you.
But I know that my voice is not nearly as loud as the critic inside of you.
The one who has convinced you that you don’t matter
That you are bad and unlovable the world would be better off without you.
I don’t know how to fight that voice either.
If I were with you right now
I would sit with you
I would bandage your cuts for you.
I would tell you in person that I care.
I think of you
I cry for you
I wonder how you are doing.
In fact, I’m wondering how you are doing right now.
I don’t know if you are dead or alive.
I don’t know if you made it through the night.
I hope you did but I don’t know.
That’s selfish of me to say – because I understand not wanting to,
And the mere pain of actually “waking up” day after day.
I’m sorry if my suggestions last night seemed to you like putting a Barbie band-aid on a point blank shotgun wound to the chest. I’m sure it must have felt like that. Sometimes I wish I had a tourniquet instead. But I don’t. But at least I didn’t offer you any kool-aid, or tell you to hold an ice cube, or peel an orange , right? (cuz we know that **** don’t work for sure!)
I don’t know the way out of this, my friend.
If I did, I would scream it from the rooftops.
But I hope you know that even though I am absolutely 200% insane & totally unhelpful,
I do care about you.
And I thank you for inviting me into your life…and for leaving your footprint on mine.
Jul 21, 2013
Jul 21, 2013 at 10:16 AM UTC
My film class,
Is my favorite class
and the class I hate the most,
I love film,
I have a passion for this art,
this medium,
this class is my soul and bodies passion,
and like a job,
like my job,
it fits me,
but like all jobs,
there's things that just ******* ****
and it's not over the normal things,
like time and money,
its the people you work with,
or in my case,
my class,
and they are all *****
when someone makes it their point,
to upset you and hurt you everyday,
because finally you are good at something,
when you **** at science,
and allowed your math skills to fall behind,
your life is filled with lies and you find,
a reason to live,
worth all your effort and time
but the same people calling you stupid and dumb and a **** up,
in math and science,
are in this film class,
forced to take a smile,
and sarcastically say,
"good job,"
when your film gets played in class,
and even when you ask,
no one give you advice like you give when asked,
and every frame seen on the projected screen,
gives me anxiety,
and the rude, unhelpful reminders from my bullies,
don't ******* help me,
when I want to run out of my favorite class daily,
and scream in all their faces,
**** OFF"
"for once..."
but I don't
I sit,
I bit skin off skinless lips,
hold back tears,
the urge to leave,
take all my insults
that are directed at me,
with a head tilted down fake half smile,
when they should be directed to my film,
but everyday, I do get to say;
**** you,
because this year,
I make it to all my classes,
even the next one,
history.
period 11/12
with my dignity
May 14, 2015
May 14, 2015 at 3:48 PM UTC
We're all doomed
and theirs nothing to do
says
the cynical sloth
all is gloom and doom
so you may as well
hop in a hammock
and sip drinks from coconuts
This is wrong
or so they claim
because letting things rot
since nothing is perfect
is incredibly unhelpful
also nothing ventured
means nothing gained
but doesn't mean
nothing lost.
Sep 5, 2015
Sep 5, 2015 at 1:33 AM UTC
(more lyrics than poetry, but whatever)
It scares me so much, the words that she writes,
The pills that she takes, to go to sleep every night,
The things that she says, how she argues and fights,
I just want everything to end up alright,
I’m not gonna say I can’t deal, I try and I will,
I’d fight and i’d **** and if the beans are being spilled,
I love her so much, and my love’s the brashest, the boldest,
I hope how much I care is never going unnoticed,
Let it be noted, my feelings are the truest I could ever express,
And I’m thankful everyday she choose me over the rest,
But I just feel useless, unhelpful and stupid,
I know how her pain feels, I swear i’ve been through it,
If I could erase it, I promise I’d do it,
If I could take it, I’d move it, i’d break it,
So next time she smiles, she wont have to fake it
Nov 25, 2012
Nov 25, 2012 at 7:56 PM UTC
lately i've been scared
worried the darkness will last
but i hope i'm wrong
i feel powerless
so backed into a corner
but i hope i'm wrong
i feel judging eyes
like i'm not just projecting
but i hope i'm wrong
i think i see it
they wince when my mouth opens
but i hope i'm wrong
i feel unwanted
it's unlucky to know me
but i hope i'm wrong
unhelpful and shamed
no one is glad i'm here, right?
i just hope i'm wrong
only by working—
my body, my only strength
my hands hold children
but my mind is too broken
prove to me i'm wrong
Inefficient love
Subpar communication
Almost good enough
Almost worth listening to
If you say nothing
You confirm it with silence
But if you argue
Please bring some more evidence
I'm trying to hope
That this self-talk's distorted
I'm sorry my pain
Is underreported
If nobody cared
Then surely I'd be alone
And not surrounded
By those who want to love me—
But I don't know how
To feel the love that they show.
I shrink back, I hide,
Because it hurts me sometimes.
These are all my thoughts
They feel so true in my mind.
But I really hope I'm wrong.
Jul 14, 2024
Jul 14, 2024 at 5:49 PM UTC
What are you thinking? She said.
Have you ever tried standing outside
Late at night and have everything
Sound so silent that you can
Hear your ears ringing?
No. She said.
What are you thinking?
Nothing. She said.
And then you realise,
Staring into wide effervescent eyes,
That your intense willingness to be
Open and honest with this
Daisy-chain enwreathed
Creature of sensation,
Does not compliment
Her nervous wish to maintain
an extraordinarily exquisite air of mystery.
A mystery in itself, no less...
...and rather unhelpful, if you ask me.
Mar 5, 2013
Mar 5, 2013 at 2:25 PM UTC
A site I used to post to had a somewhat unhelpful, not to say discouraging, line when you had posted a poem and nobody had commented it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“There is no comment submitted by members.”
Nobody bothers; nobody cares;
nobody gives a hoot how my work fares
– or they mean to say something, but no-one remembers.
The fire of my passion is reduced to grey embers;
the most piercing of glances just meet with dull stares.
There is no comment submitted by members.
Nobody bothers; nobody cares.
Like summers of hope fading into Septembers,
or flowers I’ve grown being smothered with tares,
I search and I search but, despite all my prayers,
I read once again, with a chill like December’s,
“There is no comment submitted by members.”
May 9, 2016
May 9, 2016 at 10:33 AM UTC
" The world does not need any more white saviours. As I've said before, this just perpetuates tired and unhelpful stereotypes. Let's instead promote voices from across the continent of Africa and have serious debate. "
Ah David, oh David my son
don't you know by now that white supremacy is the old black
they don't want the educated black like you
they don't harbour the progressive talented intellectual black
only place acceptable is the sports field, the drug den and their beds
but please remember.......
your only worth to them is your enormous member and passion
your hot chilli drive, your fabled great stamina and that shiny
gleaming mahogany hue, the stuff of dreams, no brains required
NOW YOU BETTER KNOW.......
if you dare turn down a bed invite in East London by cockney wenches on heat
Say good-bye to any life you had and welcome hell's miseries
How dare you, who the hell do you think you are
You think you're better than us, you think you're superior
We will take you down a ****** strip, we will make sure you'll
never have another woman in your life
We rule the world, you better know it, you black *******
How dare you
We will wipe you out, erase you, swat you dead like a fly
We will make you wish you were never born
Bro, you're not supposed to talk back
Know your place even though you're an MP
You are still a TOKEN, still a minority, still a ****** blackman
Just thank your lucky stars and shut up!
WE are the Supreme beings and we rule your ***
Feb 28, 2019
Feb 28, 2019 at 3:49 PM UTC
I see the pain
Has marked my face
I am nothing
If not a disgrace
The lines that I
Have long drawn
Make me tired
And so I yawn
I look at all this mess
There is no outcome
And so I guess
This is just how it is
Nothing else to this
But I hate that thought
That these relationships
Are simply for nought
I don't want to believe
That this is true
But that's how it seems
Judging by the view
But maybe the view is wrong
Maybe I need to look
For a little bit longer
And maybe the outlook will change
I long to be close
To a human soul
And have each other
Truly know
The inner workings
And the outer show
But instead in my heart
The distance will grow
I am unsure
If its worth the risk
I am not pure
Perhaps that is why
Everyone will fly
Away from me
When they see
Who I really am
And my life is a sham
I am not me
Or who I want to be
But i long to grow
And to show
The world all my work
To let them all look
What the demon took
And see how I went on
And continued living
But yet no one know
And so I am alone.
Aug 16, 2017
Aug 16, 2017 at 10:29 AM UTC
Faded Magnificence.
Faded brush strokes and overgrown pots,
Hint to magnificence lost to yesteryear.
Garments preened and tailored to perfection,
fashioned upon the season to which they adhere.
Scruffy untamed edges gone awry,
A once was glory now hidden beneath the brambles,
scruffy untamed edges gone awry.
Suffocating elegance under weeds and ivy,
despair now heavy on the eye.
The sunny yet sharp disposition of the dandelion,
entangled yet proudly rearing its spiky crown.
Assuming nobility amongst the weeds,
refusing to have its regalia pulled down.
The cobbled path barely visible from the weathered door,
A secret path known only to the past.
The dainty old lady aged and weathered herself,
has given up the ghost, to the weeds which grow too fast.
Her hands tremble as in vain,
she tries to snip and trim.
Desperate measures to regain the beauty from her mind,
with unhelpful uncoordinated limbs.
Each day committed she treads the garden path,
into the gardens midst.
Wrinkled eyes adoring the last upstanding rose,
who continues to persist.
A full can sprinkled each day by trembled wrist,
intent on feeding it with love.
Scarlet periapt resplendence, which once the garden
in its entirety was reminiscent of.
Brambles snag her petticoat,
Tugging at her frail frame in a tug of war.
Yet refusing a helping hand she proudly remembers,
how beautiful her garden sang and the melody of both their core.
The old lady existing for these moments,
to which they are juxtapose.
Existing upon each others love,
the old lady and the garden rose.
©Helen Mackenzie
Mar 1, 2014
Mar 1, 2014 at 7:44 AM UTC
I'm so sorry for it
One thing after another
Piled like our Italian dinner plates
Him, it, her, everything
And you deserve none of it.
You're one of the closest to perfect beings
I've ever had the pleasure of meeting
I wish I could be there for you
But I just end up being annoying and unhelpful,
And, I might also mention,
Nervous around beautiful people.
Apr 1, 2014
Apr 1, 2014 at 4:53 PM UTC