You confessed you're feelings to me in a sweet little melody,
I liked you too.
But you know what I found out?
You're a back stabbing fake.
You had a girlfriend and you never told her how you felt.
Go on, take the knife and stab me,
You've already broken my heart.
Oh the mundane routine
"But you have accomplished so much"
How am I to go about setting off
On an adventure like this
I'm a child trapped in a body not mine
It wants me out of it
I have not the slightest where to begin
What to learn
Where to go
Should I ask them
Are they all the same
I want to beg forgiveness of myself
For putting me through everything
For not caring as I do now
I am punishing myself
Or am I telling me the truth
Knowing it will hurt more
Someone tell me what to do
Before I do something out of character
I don't know if I can handle it
I have always set the timer
Armed the blasting caps
Hid behind my own shelter
And demolished myself
Play in the rubble
Scavenge what I can
And start building again
I'm not sure why but I tried to die
And now I feel all dead inside
Do you know why I tried to die
Or why I feel so dead inside
I always feel all dead inside
Ever since the day I tried
Tried to take away my life
And tried it while holding a knife
I feel so lost looking in this knife
And I don't know why but now I cry
I cry all the lovely lullabies
Oh lovely cries
They sing me to sleep at night
Every night I lay with fright that this may be my last goodnight
The tears fall out and sing about the monsters of our fearful house
This fearful house they sing about leaves hidden sights to see
But once you see you can't turn back or you must wear a shameful hat
The shameful hate oh sinful hat
Why must you not look back
Wearing this hat oh sinful hat why must I sin for you
For sinning brings more fright of this being my last night
I think I know why I must feel so dead inside for I can not express making me a sinful mess
But a sinful mess must not address any real desire for if I do well then it's you who must bear this frightful night
If I no longer bear this dreaded frightful night it will leave me in a quake that I might not survive
A vegetable is what I will become p
And that my friend is worse than feeling oh so numb
I don't know how I started to feel all of these things
But now I know the reason why
I must stay all dead inside
Have you ever wanted to die, to be ended so badly that the first thing you think about upon coming back into existence from hours of unconsciousness is your undying wish to meet your final moments, that every breathing moment of your life you just wish deep down that you have the strength or the bravery to actually put everything to an end. to no longer have to exist and see this world that we were forced to live in and now have no choice but to continue because if we even think about wanting out we are seen as crazy or over reactive and wanting attention and as painful as it is to say you really do want attention because you've spent years holding in everything that you feel and are but no one has ever really noticed you and acknowledged the hard work and things you've done in this life you didn't ask for. it seems like everyday i grow closer and closer towards finally taking action on my own life. i wish to cease my breath and thought, to finally return to the infinite void that stares at us everyday, but should i tell anyone, they would say "its only for now"
at this point i don't even know what to say to people or how to correctly interact with those around me because i can just sense the difference between someone who lives in light and myself who drowns in the darkness, i want to be able to reach them but i also don't want to risk dragging them down with me into the depths by holding onto something i could never have
Guys, I'm in Spain!
The S is silent.
we are thespians in a masquerade,
spilling our thousand acts of charade
whilst the soul bleeds on a blade
yet we float, neither alive nor dead.
we are dolls in a tea party,
choking on liquid vacuity
our heads a barren ghost city
nameless, aimless, brimming pity.
our middle name is empty.
i don't even know what this means besides a complete void. seriously. my head and my poetry account are almost dead.
Out for mous
In le hous
He slithery slither
And then he starts wither
"I don't feel so good, Mr. Stark"
Dont eat the children sneeky snek
you're a beautiful facade
King of a fallen crown
a smile doesn't reach your eyes
cause baby, you're dead inside
You're dead to me,
But still very much alive,
I care carelessly,
It hurts me every single time.
My love for you,
Is a contradiction.
I love and hate you at the same time.
You wished I were dead,
But already I am, inside.
Loved you even though you hurt me.