Bronze as the sun with a heart that was laden
A robot once walked where no flowers would waken
The robot was different, he wasn't the same
But the people around him all thought he was sane

He felt on some days as though he would explode
From the sounds all around him as he walked down the road
Was he going crazy? Was he insane?
No one understood-they all thought him inane

The darkness took over and showed on his face
All that he knew was he didn't belong in this place
He felt all alone and one day he decided
That maybe this life wasn't worth what he'd tried

The robot one day sat alone on a bridge
And he wondered and thought as he sat on the ridge
Would anyone notice if he disappeared?
Or was he as invisible as he feared?

He slipped one foot then another over the edge
And he straightened his back and let go of the ledge
He fell and he fell toward the icy cold
And when he hit the surface-his face was still bold

And when they found him a few days later
All of those people they thought him greater
They told of the things that they had seen him do
How selfless he lived, how brave, and how true

They hadn't known him-not as they thought
He was dying inside, but still he had fought
He had been dead long before he did jump
Long before all the words and the hurt made him slump

But now he was free of the hurt and the lies
He sits with the fishes and there he will lie
He sings every night of the things he was told:
That he didn't have feelings and how he stayed gold

And some nights when people feel strange, or feel sad
And stand on that bridge when they need to feel glad
He'll whisper a something that comforts their hearts
That will let them know that they can restart

"Tomorrow's a new day and you're a good soul
And you can start over and make yourself whole"
"The Robot will stay there," it's said, "Till he's done
Till no more sad people feel the need to run"

"He'll lay there beneath with his back still held straight
And then, when he's done, they'll know he was great."
The Robot is sadness in ****** form
The people are haters who bring on the storms

The bridge is the thoughts that plague us at night
The water the thing that gives them the sight
The song is our voices when we are long gone
And comfort to hold us when we seem to drown

You aren't alone, you will always have me
No matter where you are, no matter the scene
I will sing for you, I will hold tight
When no one else hears you, or can feel your light

My dearest, my darling, just hold on to this:
You are a blessing and deserve such bliss
Bring me your sadness, bring me your shame
Bring me your broken and bring me your blame

Just let me hold you when things seem so dark
And let me show you that there is a spark.
There is a something that makes this worth living
And it's time to take, instead of just giving.

You gave all your live, and give still in death
You inhale forgiveness, and smile with breath
It's time just to take, and yourself forgive
And always remember that there's is a reason to live.

I've never been happy
Not before I met you
I thought that I had
But it was untrue.

I could smile sometimes
And laugh quite a bit
But I guess I was hiding
It just didn't fit

I've never been happy
Not before knowing this
I didn't know
What was true bliss?

But you make me happy
You make me smile
And I plan to keep
It this way for awhile

I've known you for years,
But you don't know me
I've listened to you play
But you don't notice
I've seen you every week
But you don't see me
I speak to you sometimes
But we don't talk

It makes me wonder
If you knew me
If you could see me
Hear me
If we talked
Would you still like me?

If you looked up
From those piano keys
Would you even notice I was here?

She is gray outside.
But her heart is blue.
She loves to smile
But she forgot how

He is black outside
But his mind is yellow
He loves to sing
But they tell him he can't

She is white on the outside
But her thoughts are red
She is a genius
And they hate her for it

He is brown outside
But on the inside, he is pink
He loves to dance
But they tell him he is girly for it

We all have our own colors
We are all different on the inside
We are all beautiful
No one is ugly

I am not okay
not many can tell.

but the rain will still fall

I walk alone
somewhere far away from my afflictions
Tears drip from my cheeks
Onto the snow.

But the rain will still fall
The snow will melt

I cry myself to sleep.
I think this is all a nightmare.
soon I will wake up.
But I don't

But the rain will still fall
The snow will melt
And the grass will grow

A silent scream
erupts from my lips
I can't take this

But the rain will still fall
The snow will melt
And the grass will grow
The sun will come out

I'm not okay.
My heart
Hurts

But the rain will still fall
The snow will melt
And the grass will grow.
The sun will come out
And I'll get better.

I'll get better.

Everyone says
That it will all be okay
And that everyone will stay
Is that really the way?
I can't do this alone

But what happens
When they take it all for real
You fake a smile you don't feel
Set your resolve like steel
You've got to press on through.

It's come again
I am drowning on my own
I am lost and feel alone
My heart feels cold like stone
I can't do it this time

It was a fluke
How I survived for this long
Pretending to be strong
Just walking on along
Can't do this anymore

My life is agony
A silent scream
Only I can hear

Pain
Sweet
Bitter pain
A heaven of
Screams
A hell of
Bliss

What is this?
Who am I?
What am I doing here?

In this world
I am the antagonist

The evil one
Fighting
For her own gain.

Sweet God help me

I'm drowning again.

I am misplaced
I am a butterfly
In a field of cocoons
I don't belong here.

Don't treat me like I've never been afraid.
Don't treat me like I've never had anxiety
Or been depressed
Or had a panic attack
I've done more than you think
I've felt more than you know
I've shaken harder
With fear
Than you ever have.

What's wrong, you ask?

Haha

Funny.

Lies, lies, lies
Everywhere.

I've been lied to
So many times
"I'll never leave."
"You're my best friend."
"I'll stop bothering you."
"I hate him."
"I love him."

I don't even know what truth is anymore.
Can't
Trust
Anyone
Anymore.

Home isn't a place

More often than not

It's a person

And I have to say

I don't know where home is anymore

It always seems to help
A kind of self...self-help
To diagnose this

It always seems better
Released from the fetters
Of my emotions

I can smile

You lied to me
Again

I knew you would
But then

I never thought
It would

Be something like
Like this

Now what do I
I do?

I decided
To move

To move on and
Forward

To forgive and
Forget

While the rest of you
Are trying to impress everyone
And live
On
The
Wild side
Some of us
Are just trying to have
A normal
Ordinary
Life

It's not as easy
As drugs
Or *****

It's not something
You pick
Or choose

It's not a thing
You can
Control

It blackens you
Like soot
Or coal

I wish it were
Simple
Easy

But it's not
Something you fix

I wish there was a manual
Telling me what to say
A speech to give to someone
To not push them away

I wish someone wanted me
The way I wanted them
Someone to fall in love with
My loneliness to stem

"You'll find someone" they tell me
But I don't want to wait
I want to find someone now
But no, I'll have to stay

The search is never over
I'll look for all my days
Who knows if I will find someone
To be my hope and stay?

It's easy for everyone
Else, they've all found they're love
A perfect match for perfect ones
A match made up above

They don't get to say that
I'll "find someone someday"
It's easy to look out on me
And with confidence say:

"You'll find your special someone
He's out there somewhere, dear"
I don't want him to be "out there"
•
•
•
•
I want him to be here.

No one should have to stay up
Stifling sobs
Because they don't feel worthy
Of someone's care

No one should ever feel guilty for
Loving someone
Or even showing interest in them

No one should ever have to feel
***** for brushing hands with
Their soul mate

No one should ever feel
Too ugly for society

No one should ever feel
Too vulnerable to express
Feelings they've had for
What seems like forever.

No family should ever
Make their child feel bad
For the style of music they like
Or books they read
Or clothes they wear
Or makeup they have

No girl should ever feel
Like no one could ever love her
Because of the way someone has told her
And convinced her
She is

No boy should ever be
Teased
And mocked
For feeling emotions stronger
Or deeper
Than others are capable of

The way he is treated
The way she is made out to be
The way they are made
To hate the sight of themselves
Should never have entered into human
Thought.
We are all beautiful
We are all lovely.

I wish someone would notice
What's wrong
I pray and pray but life just
Goes along
Why can't you hear my restless
Mournful song
Help me
Please
I'm drowning.

"You're not really alone"

But I feel alone
Don't try to fix it
By constantly trying to talk
Just listen
Help me find someone
Who makes me feel not alone.

All these people missing each other
And more often than not
They are separated by
A Distance they never wanted

I live for the moments.
Not the times or the days.
I live for the memories
When I'm swept away.

I live for sweet things
Hugs and kisses at night
For opening the door for me
And turning off the lights

I live for porchstep-kisses
And stars hung in the sky
I live for the wonderful things
The ones that get me by

I live for actions, not just people
I watch what they do
A deep head-thrown-back laugh
Little things get me through

I live for the soft things
A bird that flutters by
The jumping of a fish
The kiss of butterflies

I live for the love
And for the lovely things
I love the thought of fantasy
Of kings and of Queens

My heart beats for the good times
The times of happiness
Where all of my anxiety
Shrinks away like mist

I breathe for the gentle times
The rise and fall of a chest
For late-night sipping cocktails
Until there's nothing left

I live for pouring out emotions
I didn't think I had
And saying I'm upset when
I didn't know I was sad

I live for the moments
And the times of trust
When I know they'll last forever
Like friendship's loving rust.

I don’t understand
Why the most important thing
Is to be physically beautiful.

I don’t understand why it is required that
We do our best to impress
People we don’t even know
It’s all for show

So why do we go on
Dragging our feet
Smiling on the street
But crying inside

When the tears that streak
Our eyes
When we cry
Show the beauty we hide

We may be broken
We may be sad
But we are all beautiful
On the inside

We must walk in light
And not in darkness
Speak of truth
And not of night

Think of good intent
And not of evil
Love like God
And live like Christ

We must treat our friends
The same as we
Give to them
And not take back

Jesus loves the weak
And the burdened
Holds them close
And ne'r let's go

Lord

Give me strength to
Love the wounded
Care for them
As you did me

Show them how you
Brought me-wanderer
Down to kneel
Before the king

Give me peace like
Bright blue rivers
Let me pass
it to my own

Give me lungs to
Sing your praises
You are I AM to
Make it known

If there was a world
Where I lived without you
Had other friends
That would be something new

If there was a world
Where you didn't exist
Would I have a reason
A way to persist?

If there was a place
Where you didn't survive
Or lived somewhere else
Or you weren't alive

If there was a plane
Where you, my treasure
We're taken from me
With all of life's pleasure

I can't say I'd know
Whatever to do
Because, dearest friend
I can't live without you

So do keep on well
And try to survive
I can't live without you
So keep by my side

Wind whips through my hair
Sending it like a cat of nine tails
Across my face

I smile on

A foam of gray spreads its wings above me
So different from the blue of yesterday

Bleak brown figures reach
Their bare arms towards me
Begging for the coverings they have shed

I glance down, and rise up
A shiny black surface smiles at me
How odd that the chariots that ride it
Are so rusty
And unadorned
Unlike the solid ground
I once rode on
Gray and ugly, but ridden by shiny, beautiful things
Almost as if to say that the most beautiful
Things are found at the lowest point

Sky above me
Trees around me
Ground beneath me
Blood inside

Take me to a summer where
Glory will in my eyes shine

I finally gave him
All that I said I would.

If I could write a poem
From the notes of a song
A song near
And dear
To
My beating heart

And plucked out by
My heart strings,

I would write a novel

But alas
They are just notes
And these - majestic words.

You, God, are holy
My foes are lowly
Your arms they comfort
And stay with me

My heart is heavy
My face downcast and
My emotions get
Away from me

But praise to you who made the stars
They will shine out your name
This battle is not ours
And you love me still the same
So praise your name

You, Christ, are lofty
Though my heart pains me
I trust in you, ***
You loved me first

Heartbeats-they weaken
The sun will sink and
The dark will set in
But you remain

But praise to you who made the stars
They will shine out your name
This battle is not ours
And you love me still the same
So praise your name
We praise your name

You lift me up above
And down below
To show your love
So we can know

Your garments torn up
You drank from hell's cup
To lift us all up
To show us love

But praise to you who made the stars
They will shine out your name
This battle is not ours
And you love me still the same
So praise your name

I don't know what I believe
Just that my heart screams out "no more"

Am I the villain here today
Or victim with my tears unsure

Though I don't know where I play part
I have been weeping from the start

Amazing grace how sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me

Please help me now, I feel I drown,
I'm lost within the sea

It all just keeps getting
Worse
And
Worse
Because the people who said
They'd never leave me
Think I'm weird for being so sad.

I poison all the happy people with
My sadness

I'm sorry I'm not as pretty as her
I'm sorry I'm not as funny as her
I'm sorry I'm not as "cool" as her
I'm sorry I don't laugh as nice as her
Trust me. I live with her every day.
I know how perfect she is.

But I'm a human, too.
I still feel things as deeply
If not deeper
Than she does

Life is sad
Life is depressing
Life is slow
Life is angry
Life is rough
Life is...too much.

So breathe deep
Sing loudly
Dance any way you want
Have long emotional conversations
Listen to music
Take long showers
And never
Ever
Feel unloved.

In 2 days
I will either
Lose you forever
Or see you
Every week.
Please
Please
Please

He's The One
He's always there for me
Had a not-so-little crush on him
In 3rd grade

And I love him far as telescopes can see
I'm the only one who'll love him
'Till my last breath.

But then there's her
Who'll leave him
When the sun comes up

But he holds her tighter
He loves her more
All these emotions
Swirling 'round
Make my heart sore
He pulls her closer
They push me away
And oh my heart
How I long for him to say
"If you're willing still
Please have me
Do you love me?"

A few years pass
And he still holds her near
And my heartbeat still gets fast
When he walks toward me

I still love him far as telescopes can see
But she's got him in her grip
And won't let go

But then there's me
Standing in the background
Wishing he
Would hold me just as close

But he holds her tighter
He loves her more
All these emotions
Swirling 'round
Put me at war
He pulls her closer
They push me away
And oh, my mind
And heart and soul
Just scream and say
"Please leave her
I still want you
Do you love me?"

I'd found my  love
I'd found The One
I'd found my sweetheart
But there he was
He stole my heart
And now it's beating

He held her tighter.
He loved her more
All the emotions
Love, hate, anger
I'm at war.
He pulled her closer
They pushed me away
But now he's come
And says
"I've got something to say:
If you're willing still
Please have me
Could you love me?"

I'd love to tell you
That when you
Light up
My phone's screen

I smile

And smile.

That when
You message me first
It makes me feel so special
Like you want to speak to me

That hugging you
When we see each other
Makes my heart flutter

That loving you
Is so much more
Than just a longing

Because I think you are The One

But I can't.

Because then you'd know.

There
Is so much negativity
In this place
That I
I can barely breathe.

And crushing
Crushing my spirit
When I want to make it better
Only hurts the healing.

I love you more
Than day is long
But what I feel
It seems so wrong

Because you love
One of my friends
And still this pain
Will never end

Instead I have
To sit here and
Just feel my heart
Break and bend

I wish that I
Could hate you, sir
But for this love
There is no cure

Yes, only time
Can mend this thing
So linger I
To hope clinging

Am I the only one
Who loves
When I'm in a car
And it's pouring
Down rain
And you go under a bridge
And everything
Just for a moment is peaceful
And quiet?

I wish it happened more often.
But then it wouldn't be so special.