My love
My life
Blissful truths sustain me
Our time is just beginning
Tests and trials abound
tearing flesh open over scars
It changes nothing
My love for you grows
with each passing second
My heart is overjoyed in tactile memories
The smell of your skin soothes me
The sound of your laughter begs a smile
Your pewter eyes shimmer in love's reflection
The essence of you resides in me
as the truth of who I am resides in you
Unmasked and laid bare
I am at your feet
offering you all that I am
For it has always been yours
And you have always been mine
Our eternity is united, entwined
Through the flames that burn away
a world we were never meant to fight through,
we will emerge a sphere of light
a cosmic bubble of peace
Love seems too small of a word
though it is all there is
We.. are
We are love
We are truth
We are both reality and the dream
We cure the disease of distance
with a spirit that defines us
Meet me through the miles
where this plane cannot reach us
where time is eternal
And the blissful truth of us
remains pure
Untainted by an unkind world
which is nothing
But tomorrow's past

So weak is the mind
That the heart feels drained
Evaporating love in respire
Pretending inviolate love
Has a place here
Ascension of the soul
Negated by nocturnal verbosity
Insipid words of discontent
Exacerbated by the irrationality of emotion

Wasted
Alone in a land of wishes
Wanting to be wanted
Needing to be loved
Never realizing
It is in the very air
Taken in with every breathe
Waiting
In a world of half truths
And make believe
For a fairytale dream
Afraid to be dreamt
Longing
For what was deemed undeserved
In a life suffering in settlement
Searching
Through nightmares
For a pinpoint of light
For an alternate reality
For some semblance of home
Finding
What has always existed
What was birthed side by side
Created from the very same dust
Before time
Through time
Knowing
Loneliness no longer exists

Permeating the depths through cracks in the wall
The light fades into darkness once more
The hope of its return glimmers

The path to tomorrow is paved with those glimmers
Toward a day when that hope will break the wall
And the future will shine so brightly once more

When no longer remains a longing for more
The glare born in hope is much more than that glimmer
And powdered earth is all that is left of the wall

Light must return through cracks in the wall, darkness can be taken no more, a glimmer is not much to hold onto.

When I said that I'd be bad company
I meant that only you could brighten my day
The sound of your voice is my sunshine

When I offered for you to let me be
I meant that I would never force you to tolerate me
But hoped that you would want me by your side anyway

When I pushed you aside, however delicately
I meant for you to not want to go
For you to just sit with me for awhile

When I said I wasn't in the mood to talk
I meant for you to sit with me
In comfortable silence until you kissed me happy

When I sent you a message warning of my grumpy
I meant for you to call me
And make sure I was alright

When I said that I couldn't
I meant for you to show me that you believed in me
To help me believe in myself

When I set you free
I meant for you to not want to leave
For you to stay with me always

Bright and shiny
Pedestrian views
Glare induces migraines
Simplistic bands of nothingness
Almost too painful to watch
Pushed beyond painted lines
Crossing into...nowhere
Where is the dark and twisted,
The interesting and obscure?
Turn the lights off and feel the way
Touch the cold steel
Delight in the balmy breeze
Experience...everything

Minutes to hours to days to weeks
No one can find what they do not seek
Persist even when the future is bleak
Make better choices
The heart is strong when the spirit is weak
Don't heed the voices

The ones that speak to you alone
That talk you into what you can't condone
They say you have no mind of your own
And the flesh will rule you
And you feel a child, even though you're grown
How the mind can fool you

Feelings overrule the mind
The heart is ever so unkind
With temptation close behind
It's logic or passion
It's a battle you will find
of brutal fashion

Lodged between the moral wrong
More than tragedy in song
Walking where you don't belong
The path's not chosen
Standing still, yet pulled along
Toward a heart Ambrosian

when your heart is heavy
and your mind is blank
and the words just will not come
sadness is too strong a term
for the emptiness that drowns you
thankful for the distance in between
for the moments in silence
without harshness
without the verbal daggers
gaping wounds begin to scab
grated off with the next conversation
each exchange naught but a reminder
of a past that held a different future

Across the room I watched as he stroked her hair
The gentlest of fingers brushed her face
From his gray eyes he poured love into her pools of sage
The sweetness touched me as I am sure it touched her
And I watched him, in that moment, be a man
The man I had hoped he'd become
With a full heart I turned away
Proud of who he is, who he has always been
Hoping, that in some small way, I taught him well
As I watched their hearts soar
I walked away letting him love her

How deep the depths to which you have touched me

Places that laid waiting in shadows, drowning in stagnant air

You have pulled up the blinds and opened a window

Lighting each corner, each crack that had only been accessible to the darkest fog

You have quietly healed what I had long forgotten was broken

when his lips touched hers
the rest of the world disappeared
and in the moment she could taste his breath
she believed it was the only air she ever wanted to breathe again.

Warm arms around me
As we lay in sighs of silent pleasure
Tucked into the safety of each other
Lost in the rhythm of our hearts
Basking as desire is laid to rest, momentarily
Deep breaths subside as our bodies settle
Curve against curve we remain
Bodies sated, hearts filled, and dreams turned to reality

Heart shaped boxes with red satin ribbons
Pink stuffed atrocities that have no use
Sappy lovesick greeting cards
Flowers that always die

Cheap chocolate massed produced
Three months of brainwashing prior
Chalky hearts profess true love
The lonely always cry

Made up days of forced romance
Bullied into mass compliance
Pressured into jewelry sales
Empty grand gestures prevail

Today is a day for puppy love
An excuse to eat by candlelight
Public affection is cool tonight
As we've appeased the Gods of retail

A day like any other day
Rising and setting moon and sun
Though nothing has changed
The heart races still

Though the chocolates are cheesy and stale
And flowers will die tomorrow
Though the world bullied the romance
I've been taken against my will

To the land of cotton candy dreams
For a few heartfelt words on paper
A card that speaks your love
And the truth that is in your eyes

Nervously, the gifts accepted
I am almost at a loss
Tears begin to well a little
And I pray the words don't lie

May I stay in this land of make-believe
Where it feels like a fairytale
Make tonight's dream, forever's reality
Wishes on wishing stars come true

Sarcastically with cynicism
And a dry wit that defines my nature
Hidden deep within the core
Of things I said I would never do

I will savor every chocolate
As if it is your warm lips on my own
And every word and cheesy line
Is the most beautiful I ever read

For you have chosen it just for me
Filled with all you cannot say
So I cherish my pink and heart-filled card
Because it is to me the words are said

From me, there is no cheesy gift
No candy covered sweets tonight
Nothing retail overblown
Just a small white box with a  hand tied bow

A poem in my own hand
As I give my heart on patterned paper
So simple, but it's everything.
Please don't ever let me go

Blade grazes skin in horizontal hatred
teaching lessons in guilt and lies
crying truth that won't break the surface
which hides the tar that seeps
through a soul unseen

Prtty, Prtty smile
on a Prtty, Prtty girl

and the lines break surface tension
'twas all the glue would hold

Every turn a reflection in karma and self-loathing
perceived as an undeserved consequence
of a past that holds no regrets

One layer breaks free
and he fails to see her cracks
through the scars he was forced to stitch alone
with the rusted skewers of time

A second pass and the blade runs clean
as idle threats yield no change
a liar demanding truth of the one who gives it freely
as it has always been

Only seeing lies oneself would tell
unable and unwilling to realize
that the truth remains true
even when seen through one's own lies

Beaten into submission
that reeks of forced pity
only covers the truth
with lies that make one feel like

A Prtty, Prtty girl
with a Prtty, Prtty smile

Reluctant to share
Loathe to believe
Defenses worn thin
Weakened by saccharine kindness
Cliche grandiosity seasoned a bland bland world
Black and white, lost in shades of gray
Colorized emotions drip life into an exsiccated heart
A sunlit spotlight of warmth
Faded painted colors can never return to grayscale
Changed forever by a moment, if not by accident

A Styrofoam box to hold my pain
To keep it safe above the water
To hold all the roles I've ever lived
Be it wife or be it daughter

Floating safe upon the surface
Mirror smooth or rapids white
It carries all the hurt and struggle
It hides my truth and holds on tight

The world can see the love and laughter
The spackled mask that faces all
The one with saccharine filled open fissures
Hiding a broken little girl

For in this body of a woman
Every gentleman's sinful lust
Is a fragile shell of being
A soul, if touched, would turn to dust

Drowning in a world of wonder
Losing sight of who I am
Safe from harm or dissolution
Floats the proof that I'm a sham

Invisible she
Sheets of anger like a storm
Blinding as they sting

It rolls in slow like the fog
Helpless to stop it from stealing
Stealing every emotion you're feeling
'Til you're a bump on a log

Colorful, vivid trails of motion
Consuming visual acuity
Leaching verbal perspucuity
Making reality a useless notion

Wringing  beauty from stagnation
Colorizing gray cement
Brick by brick it paints lament
Into farcical animation

Taking over fantasy
Cartoon smiles and laughing fits
All the fruit without the pits
Beautifying all you see

It lifts my spirits, even when they aren't down
It resonates with all things happy
Makes me tremble to the core
The expectation of its warmth
Comes as waves of unforeseen joy
When the ride ends it is always bittersweet
Until tomorrow
Until next time
When that time draws near
I wait with bated breath
In hopeful anticipation, I linger
Almost as an afterthought in throaty air
Like distant thunder in a cloudless sky
With a deep rumble and a Southern drawl
Sweet dreams always follow

One only needs to gather thoughts when searching for something nice to say

Drowning in verbosity
Lost in time
For I cannot express
In prose or rhyme
The beauty that enlivens
Kindred by chance
A victim by choice
or circumstance?
A victimless crime?
A passionate flare
Unexpected rawness
Enter, enter if you dare
Challenges accepted
Without hesitation
Jump into darkness
Accede consummation
Oh my pretty, pretty one
Whatever have we done
With hell deep in your eyes
The claiming has begun
Every calculation
And each strategic move
An action for an action
Every step it does behoove
How easily the game is played
When lines are drawn in black
Maneuvering each bitty piece
Not giving any slack
Training like a solider
Satisfying every need
Holding on to nothing
The past promised to impede
Eating demons in the flesh
A Knight in rusted armor
Feeding darkness innocence
Inherently a charmer
There you are so handsome
Seemingly sweet and kind
Hidden far behind those eyes
Lives a *****, evil mind

Across the room a subtle glance
Victims of bad circumstance
Hoping you would take the chance
Yet, nothing changes
The makings of a great romance
But time estranges

There you are just out of reach
In my mind there is a speech
Of how your heart I will beseech
I still, can feel you
The words you say I will impeach
I know the real you

The one whose kindness from the start
Has torn my faded world apart
And shown the truth to half a heart
There's so much out there
Happiness you do impart
With how much you Do care

Still it's like just yesterday
So close and yet so far away
I need you in my arms, to stay
That's my suggestion
I want you each and every day
There is no question

So sunshine mornings I have seen
Because there is no in between
The love we feel has always been
Our worst disaster
If only kisses dared to mean
Forever after

by the light of the moon he came upon her
her skin glistening in the moonlight
her dark eyes reflecting the stars
so beautiful was she, at the waters edge
watching the moon wave in the ripples
only noticing him when the heat of him grazed her
she saw his gentle eyes in his reflection
felt his heart as his lips brushed her ear
whispering only, "i am yours"
as their reflection became one with the moon

Bad dreams fill the soul with a sadness all too real.
A soul searches through the darkness
A distant beacon beckons
Stretching through shadowed tears
Touching with such earnest longing
Guided peacefully to that place between dreams,
Where emotions leach into reality
That place where "never" does not exist
It is here, where true happiness its bred

carbon copy
******* kids
all square and full of holes
chasing
someone else's dreams
doing only as they're told

gaping wounds
conformity
it's useless to resist
grayscale thoughts
behind closed eyes
rainbows do not exist

follow the leader
play pretend
grown-up rules, abide
broken backs
and camel straws
there is no place to hide

technicolor
memories
it was just a game
forty years
of servitude
society's to blame

here and now
when youth is young
and colors bold and bright
uncharted paths
with neon skies
teach them hold true and tight

planets turn
and water flows
when dreams, have yet, to die
tomorrows
more than yesterdays
the young see bluer skies

Time has passed old friend
And a call across miles
All came to an amicable end
Once again I heard you smile

Catching up is good at times
Wrapped in warmth across the wire
Listening to the sweet talk chime
Fading that you were a liar

Still more than a footnote so it seems
I stained your heart with mere affection
I'm glad that I dance through your dreams
It pretties up the recollection

Thank you dear old friend of mine
I love that you just had to call
I miss the good ways we entwined
The rest, I just don't miss at all

Traces of you line every moment silver,
     even in my darkest day
Traces of you can make the empty linger,
     the second you walk away

Traces of you are my hidden treasure,
     a joy that is all my own
Traces of you are too fine to measure,
     yet brighten my darkness alone

Traces of you make life worth living,
     the birth of my very smile
Traces of you make ease of forgiving,  
     though memories tend to beguile

Traces of you turn hell into glory,  
     then turn back the other way
Traces of you rewrite the story,
     every second of every day

years of a life
encased in concrete
and double-paned bulletproof glass
climate controlled
to a nice 72 degrees
nothing to fear
no place to fall
nowhere to go
home sweet Hell

Sitting in the dark
The Universe descends into oblivion
The only reality is us
The only truth is this very moment
In all its honesty
Filled with both longing and love
No thought but to be blanketed in each others electricity
Perhaps a hint of perfection
Or what feels enchanted
If things were different
If the Universe still existed
If reality was this,
Two hearts in desperate need
Finding what they weren't even looking for
If an honest heart meant an honest life
If this moment was everything
Then...

                    happines does exist

Frozen behind a weary mind
Thoughts like a blizzard of pain
Unable to be sorted
Unwilling to be tamed
Helpless, left to ramble
At peace from without
Tumultuous within
Life passes while standing still
Loved and Alone
Smoke chokes lungs
Sun burns eyes
Stillness in body
Burning soul steeped in pain
Wings bound by fear
Brittle from the war
With heart and mind
To languid to move
Motivated only to disappear
I can see in through a window
I can feel from across the room
But the sensation of life
The will to fight
Has all but disappeared
A ghost in the real world
Filled with the pain
Of the memory
Of love

And so it has been reached, the threshold of what was and what will be

He loved me once
With exuberance and joy
He loved me once
And saw my flaws as perfection
He loved me once
And helped me to love myself
He loved me once
With all that he is
He loved me once
With an honest soul much like my own
He loved me once
And made me believe in forever
He loved me once
With neither question nor doubt
He loved me once
And in a flash of perception
All I can say is...
He loved me once

A shadow of never was rings true in my heart