My lips are tired even if nothing is being said yet.
It's always those 'sometimes' that's nailed to my head.
Please stop crying again.
Aren't you the one who will wipe away those tears?
Don't you get annoyed every time you are blamed?
I gained my freedom from you.

While there is still strength left, I want you to know.
Here I am swearing not to do it again,
Here I am ready to leave you,
Here I am and will live alone,
I'm here and are you still there?

Please forgive me for my train of thoughts,
It's always been illogical and selfish.
I know the past is over,
It's not worth doing anymore.
Don't you get bored every time you stare at yourself?

But now I will return again,
Just for a single moment to look at you again.
Here I am standing before you,
Here I am hoping and ready to be hurt.
I'm not going to hold back anymore.

I'm here because of you, I'm sorry, I'm a mess.
I hope you believe me.
Here I am singing confusedly.
Please understand me.

I don't care how many libraries there are
in the world.


I still look for you when I can't find the right synonym for beautiful...

The tyranny of this empty room
will always be the underlying comfort of no one.

These books left unread, has been the taste of my inglorious pursuit of happiness.

A guitar hanging on the wall collecting dust and rust, is a product of my unremarkable trust with myself.

A single bed that will be slept on later, will be filled with imaginative thoughts of grandeur,
Combined with the thoughts that betrayed me compiled with,
"I should've and could've".

Only this pen latched on to my hand to carve the honest words,
This paper to produce erasures of beautiful sentences.
The writer that will bear the coming of tomorrow.

To recollect my memory of you, Father
will be the greatest triumph I will gather.

Your comforting gaze will always be the one I long for
I had my share of quarrel with you, and yet you would always welcome me in your arms with this grace that you had.

These waves I ride today without you will always be remembered with great sorrow.

This life I have now Father, gives me the purpose to create things with these hands that you gave.
You will always be my greatest treasure, in this world full of maps to an unhidden treasure.

No caverns, caves, nor dark places will make me fear this life.
For Father you are with me.

Father, do not fear my existence.
I will give my life willingly to grace.
For this world carved me to be damaged.
But I remember you telling me to walk hard.
Thus, I will gladly jump into the fray with you by my side and spirit.

As I remember you on this 21st.
Know that you Father are my Prayer.
My soul.
My sanity.
My everything.
Let me be your reckoning.

I miss you father. With all the pieces of my heart.

Each word I exchanged with you,
each one of them is raining down on me
like falling stars.

The sky I looked at alone,
seemed like it was about to swallow me up.
I was afraid.

The starry night we shared was incredibly brilliant,
it somehow seemed unstable.

A single petal that came in my life.
Only you mattered.

This is my punishment.

Every day, these walks get longer.
Every hour, these hands, they tremble.
Every minute, these eyes get weary.
Every second, this existence is fading.

As light approaches this darkened room,
We are shrouded in to the fog of melancholy.
Devoured by misery, consumed by life,
Slowly and slowly we burn into nothingness.

These gaps exist with the soul of our hearts.
The void of joylessness approaches.
All these *** that emotions can’t afford,
Our tears are kept in a jar.

What sick, ****** contagious lives we have.
We are fools to the repetitious cycle of despair.
We continue to gaze at the fields of the condemned.

How about a cigarette for us to breathe?
But let us quench into the foolishness of life.

Must my heart thirst for hunger?
This naked pain is my existence.
Every memory of you is becoming vague.
and, a monster I have become.

Throw me into the sea of melancholy.
Let me drown with this depression.
Color me with your favorite color,
And gray I will become.

These screams of my heart cannot be heard.
But this twinkling night is my escape.

Slowly, I am dancing in a burning forest.
This vibration called sorrow is approaching.

I am afraid, you will taste the cigarette in my mouth once we collide.

Forgive me,
For I was trying to avoid my pen.
But this thoughts of you will be the death of me.

Never have I felt so lonesome tonight.
Like a fallen prince, stranded in a desert.

I have worn this mask for so long.
Feast your beautiful eyes, as I rot away.

Come morning light,
Embrace me with great euphoria.
Save me from this agony.

A torn mind with a bleeding heart exists at 3 A.M.

Cigarettes and pens burning through his fingers.
The sorrow of his tears melting through his cheeks.

Her words on his mind,
he felt sadness in his veins.

He remembers the warmth in her eyes,
the grace of her smile,
and the comfort of her stare.
He closes his eyes for a second,
and he felt home.

No sadness can bear what he did,
No agony can compare his own deal,
His sacrifices were all have been in vain.

Now, his pen has broken him into pieces.
The production of agony,
the destruction of his heart,
the remnants of love,
have vanished decisively.

But every letter that he writes is only spelled with her name,
he figures.

He may never see the light in her anymore,
for she was the only light he ever saw.

If I tell the sorrows in my heart,
it will burn my tongue.

If I keep it inside,
I'm afraid it will burn my bones.

If I let it go,
I'm afraid it would burn the whole world.

I can't let it out,
So I let my sorrows stay inside.

Be still and write.
Let the fire in you become wildfire as your worries enfolds you.
Create words as if the last sentence you will produce will create greatness.
Stand firmly as the darkness slowly creeps,
let light shine upon you as you pray to the almighty however you may perceive him to be.

Walk as if the adventure will be the destination,
Run as you go unknowingly to tomorrow.

Smile as you find the peace of your mind,
laugh as you greet your heart with euphoria.

Treat people as if kindness is our only virtue,
dedicate actions thru affections.

Plant your feet into the ground,
carry each other's weight with great care.
Feel not of heroism,
but instead be heedfully compassionate.

Write like the sunset will be the last you will see today.
Give life chances as it surprises you with grace.

I have already grew fond of the night that grew longer.
This cold in the desert is what I always had.
My storms grew hurricane from the depths of my mind.
Would you hold on to me if the darkness embraces me?

If I became cold as ice,
would your fire thaw me from this agony?
Would the sight of your forgiving smile, keep me warm?

When my stars fell from the sky, would you admire me still?
Do you dare, to make it or break it?

Let me down gently.
As I fear and tremble.

I am ashes produced by a volcano of constant despair.

Hold on to me, as I lose myself from this storm from the pain that which I never shared.

Tell me, do you dare?

Your eyes they seem distant.
They fill me with great curiosity.
When I called your name,
you looked at me and smiled.

I remember the warmth of it.
It was the hope for a disaster.
Like a torch in a dark cave,
I'll find my way home to you.

Your eyes they paint the art in me.
It was a masterpiece.
Like a paintbrush surfing through the
waves of purity.

I burn in every gaze.
Like a phoenix dying, revived only by your love.

That warmth of your smile,
I imagine myself melting.
Staring at your homeless smile.

I long for you.
My favorite eyes and lips.

I use to say to myself that,
You and I were two parts of a single being.
Hoping to become one.

I was wrong.
Fate was wrong.

I couldn't defy nature for you.

I know what kind of face I should make.
Tracing my mind without any place that I could call my home.
I shouldn't be crying between nightmares,
knowing how I should look and what I have to do.
So, I'll continue be in the abyss.

All I can do is to imagine,
that someday this cursed life would come to an end.
Running and falling down, embracing the pain that doesn't heal.
The world is waiting for this moment to come.

Tender emotions that's creating a bug,
consequences made for obeying.
Fragile thoughts while risking my life,
not a single word was spoken.

Uncertain voices are whispering deep inside,
beyond the spiral that I can reach for a helping hand.
I wish I could move forward,
Pursuing to be strong and yet I'm all alone.

This pitch-black bottom of the night will surround me,
deep inside this endless maze.

Do you see me in a mess?
Pathetic as it is, more or less.
Just like a corpse without a soul inside,
I am nothing.

My love,
Won't you explain to me the unbearable madness of sadness?
Tell me of the things that we speak and we do.
Give me the comfort of lightness in my heart.

Won't you guide my hand into your chest?
Let me feel the beat of your love.
Then, sing me the melody of your silence.

Those eyes with deep dark blue ocean,
washes over me and I gladly drown.

Won't you let me paint your canvas with my love?
I promise it to be heavenly tragic.
In this way, we will kiss our love in the fading moonlight.

But we are a catastrophe of romance.
You, will turn into a beautiful swan.
I, will turn into the abyss.

Here’s to the cries of your agony,
The stabbed words into your heart.

To the pain of your kiss.
For the sweet surrender of your mouth.

A drink for your intense hatred.
To anguish your divine love.

To the delight of torment,
For the never ending river of tears.

Three cheers for your lonely eyes,
To the taste of your sorrow cries.

A drink for euphoria,
You are lost in the wilderness of confusion.

But for you I write the unbearable sadness.
Your frozen heart, your fiery frozen heart..

The heart that touches, the hands that bind.
Your need for wants, but the wants that you bleed.

The lines of love, the despair of silence.
To the dance of death, a scotch for your waltz

I will go now.
I won't be far.
I will always be at your side.
I wish you the greatest grace.

I will go now.
Light the fire in your heart once more.
So when darkness approaches,
The light of your love is the guide
to this excruciating life.

I will go now.
Don't mind me.
But here is a heart that longs for you.
You are the greatest faith that I had.

I will go now.
I'll leave you be.
Be still, my love.
Your name will always be the harmony to my ears.

I love you.
Farewell.

Come in you sinking sun, let's make love under the drowning fire.

Let's fly high to see the sky, and die beside the rye.

I see your dark blue eyes, the clouds turn green as you are at ease.

Your hair turns gold as I keep you from my mold.

I drown in the waterless ocean, as you burn in every gaze.

Let's dance in darkness, as the moon sets in a sinking light.

Make love to me, in this burning bed.
and I will have my way,
to your loving body all over.

A little bit of *** in you,
I have love on my fingers,
and lust on my tounge.

Sing to me soul, the moaning pleasure,
As I kiss your delicious shoulder, until I get to your chest.
So let me forever remember this sensation.

Must I resist,
If you insist,
To make release this fascination?

Your **** hips,
and asking lips
is all I wanna do.

So grant me this voluptuous kindness.
In return, I will make sweet, hard love to you in this fiery bed.

Thus, the art I seek, I found only in you.

This wolf will howl only your name,

Like a song of fire, raging against the dying of the night.

You walk with kindness in your eyes.
and my heart took chances with your lies.
These streets are empty with the sound of your smiles.
only to find you running away from me with great miles.
and I was left behind.

You generate warmth with your touch.
As if life is only created with your torch.

Fire is what you are,
and I will be afar.

We are weaved by the threads of fate.

To be vague and convinced through the lack of conviction, is our destiny.

Thrown to the depths of handshakes and pleasure.

We are swallowed by the vendetta of romance.

We are keen to distinct lust of
attachment.

We have kept the hunger for affection.

Suffice the thirst for life, only to find the fate of tomorrow.

Bound to the stages of conditions.

And you are here,
Beautiful and ******.

Tell me the things that didn't make sense.
Is it the way that I talk when we were together at pitch black mornings?
Was it the things that you read on my notebook telling my demons to stay away?
Could it be the hunger that I felt when I had to worry that my dreams is nothing but based on false victory?
Maybe it was the silence that I gave when life threw me back where I first started?

Tell me how it should make sense.
Must I always run to chase greatness?
I could try and sit properly with the obstacles as my seat, and I tried writing differently, but my pen broke a million pieces to show me that my sadness is incurable.
Should I be looking at the dark to approach love as if driving my car will reach a destination?

Tell me things that would make sense.
Is paradise only achieved when kindness broke down my heart to show me how it can shatter the tallest walls that I could ever create with my bare hands?
That grief gave me maturity at 4AMs to tell me that, when sunrise comes I will be unbearable.
That the war I have been on to, has given me nothing but sharp bullets shot through the back of my skull just for me to see how I will bleed.

Many times, I can only ask what things that would make sense.
Living in this cruel world, has only invaded my reality with foreseen tales of triumph and conquered mountains that I will never reach.

I dream of you tonight for the twelfth time.
I was looking for you everywhere.
But still, I ran and fated to never find you.
Why must it that you're so close to me,
Yet you're so far away?

I grasp you in my hand that time,
And you told me "It's okay."
Then, we collided.

I woke up.
I lay awake in tremendous confusion.
Curse this bed of vividness.
I was drunk and never to be sober by you.

******* it.
I want to escape your lusting jungle.
And here I am writing about you again.

I cannot find a way to fathom this longing
for you.

This thirst for you is unbearable.
I flew like a cannonball,
and flee like a deer in fray.

But I can't forget.
Now, as this cigarettes fades,
I write this for 5 minutes,
and still thought of you every single minute of every second.

Count me the stars one last time,
while I lay awake in my dream.

I satisfy myself in to this darkness that I have fallen into.

And I feel I am lost in a trance of despaired dance.

Never to grasp a part of me. All because I have lost an important slice of me.

There was a mysterious smile on my face today.
I knew that there was a certain death today.
Today, may be the last time my lips will curl.

There was a monogomous hymn in my head.
It was the soft humming of your lovely voice.

Slowly, I fell asleep.
I knew it will be the death of me.

It was a wildfire I left burning in your heart.
But I knew it will be the death of me.

So I died.
I died, the tremendous death.

As I lay dying,
I saw the sight of your face.

Contemplating.
Smiling.
Confused.
Disgusted.
Happy.
As a river of tears washes my face.

I knew it was the death of me.
So I died.
I died the tragic death.
But you didn't.

Live.

I am to stare at the sleepless night of tomorrow.
This eyes carry the weight of my blindness,
and I tremble before the dark.

My heart is impaled by pain,
and this ash filled lungs destroys me.

I feel the breeze of the night,
and sorrow kisses my forehead.
Endless silence whispering through my ears.

This inevitable confusion keeps me company.
Hands sweating and fingers writing with burning passion.

I am slowly being carried by the waves of nothingness.

Surely, I'll drown.
Then I'll be latched with great sadness all over again.

Gray skies cloud my mind.
This tower will fall into this skyfall.
The rope that will rescue will burn.
This cigarette in your hand, will be the
euphoria of tomorrow.

The stars above will be the death of me.
This shallow wind carries me into the heavens.
As I open my arms unto you,
You have embraced me with deep regret.

Soon, I will fall below the great sky.

This fire in my heart will not survive winter.
It will be extinguished from the cycle of the ******.

One more step, I say.
I hear nothing but the voices in my head.
They say, leave this place.
Throw yourself into freedom,
Be one with the ashes.

Now, I am one with the air.
Sharp hurricanes of wind breezes before me.
I get high with rush,
and soon I am hovering.
Flying.
Falling.
Crying.

My arms have fallen into the sky.
Soon I will turn into dust.

I was born when she kissed me.
I died when she left me.
I lived a few weeks, when she loved me.

Green Green Rocky Road

Green green rocky road,
take me to a place where silence is a luxury,
and the quiet is my existence.

Green green rocky road,
Walk with me to a place where life is an adventure.
Where the demons won't reach my heart.

Green green rocky road,
where the sea calls me on,
and ride the waves that will wash my sins away.

Green green Rocky road,
Please forgive me for what I am,
I am just a poor boy, sorrow's my middle name.

I'm trying
To find you,
in our place
And you're not here.

How can I stand up;
Recover
the wounds from
A Love forgotten?

I'm always
thinking about you
I read all of your letters
How can I stop
All this sadness
This tears from;
A Love forgotten?

I'm trying to find all
of the warm and sad days
I'm giving you this letter
that I made from
A love Forgotten.

I will venture into the past,
I will go back to the start.
Where memories were once made;
Naively hoping.
Naively hoping.
Naively hoping.

After work,
As the sun set's in,
It's always the harmony of your voice that I chase,
"Shall we head home?"
"What should we eat today?"
"Here's what happened today."
I miss you like the sun misses the moon.
A never ending ordinary love.

Any and everyday,
Is a miracle with you.
In the kitchen where we keep our lives,
Holding hands as we give comfort to our hearts,
No matter what happens in the future,
That's what I wanted to talk to you about.

I always dream of you.
Along the lines of joy and grief.
Binded in chains made of comfort.
Filled in the air of you.

Let's talk a bit more, my beloved.
My dearly departed.
Hope guides me,
It's the treasure that I always had.

Embrace me, dearest one.
Forgive me for I am not wise.
The cross that I carry is only bearable,
If I'm with you.

Fare thee well, my star,
my sorrow and my love.
If home is a sin,
I'll go home to you.

I walk this empty halls with great stride.
The remnants of the fallen is excruciating.
My hands tremble with the fate that I have.

Endless battles from nameless enemies,
Wars and combat with unseeming cause.
Fight me, oh fight me and then hang me.

How long will this triumph fade?
For the sky is crying.
One eye of mine can see tomorrow,
But other eye is still lost on yesterday.
I have to end it all no regrets.

Tell me what sorrow feels like
When will the hurt be over?
How much will I tolerate?
This wounds I am left with, I am scarred and dented.

Fear me and call me lonesome for combat.

Every now and then,
I yearn for your longing.
It's like the world is not turning,
and I can smell the fire burning.

I remember your cold touch in mornings.
Here in my empty sheets,
it comes without any warnings.

Ever so often, I can feel your eyes around me.
Images of you in my head living rent free,
sooner or later I'm overflowing with glee.  

I watched you enter my life.
You were someone, somewhere on a different drive.
I remembered that I can't wait for it to be five,
because I'll see you soon then when I dive.

Rainbows after the rain, and a flower that bloomed with the cold,
are abundantly changing colors.

I fell in love with you that day,
as you gazed up the crimson sky.

That one instant in a scene of the dramatic film
Won't disappear, because it's etched into my heart

It's you, you who taught me.
If the darkness shines too, then it'll become a night of stars.
Don't hide your sadness behind a laughing face anymore,
Because all the twinkling stars will shine on you.

I forgot to sleep, and the sun that came out to meet me pierced me so much.
If I see you, I even forget the headache that carries my foul mood.

This stillness is romantic, like sugar melting in black tea.
Your voice, it goes around my whole body.

It's you, you who gave me a smiling face
If tears shine too, then it'll become a falling star
Don't separate those injured hands anymore
Because tomorrow will come to the sky filled with wishes

The light that guided me was you
I was drawn, and I broke into a run
Before I knew it, we were beginning to cross paths
Now's the time, if we can just shine here.

It's you, you who taught me the darkness will end.

Is the answer at any time by coincidence? Is it necessary?
Some day the road that we choose will be our destiny
The hope and the anxiety you grasped tightly,
Will surely move us forwards and become with the light.

I went to the ocean today,
I'm sitting here in the shore, and wonder where your heart is right now.
You're a tidal wave of question marks etched into my mind and you're just surfing.

I was too afraid to pick my board up,
and get the feel of the water on my feet,
but I'm not ready to surf these tides without you.

Ripple in still water,
no splash can break the tide.

It really takes these moments of true agony,
To put all those little moments of happiness in perspective.

Rain, rain don't go away.

I wish we could go back to what we used to be
All those late nights not needing anything.
Back when I could write empty platitudes and it made sense.
Back when the pain was directed and easy to understand.
And hidden.

I wish we could go back to when the roughest thing we did
to our body was ask for a large at McDonald's.
Back when I smelled beer on someone and thought,
"I'll never do that". And when I saw their eyes...
Oh those eyes.
I would say, "they just need to ovecome."

Oh to be half human again.
So arrogant.
So certain.
I wish I could go back and never realize what I wrote tonight.

I abjure you.
I see you no longer.
I'll hunt with you no longer.
I'll share flesh with you, no longer.

I'll never love this way again.
I fear that this would be the end of me.
Every version of myself that I meet,
every story that is created,
every memory I can remember,
You will always be there.
It's like a never ending rollercoaster ride,
Where the thrill I seek hopelessly, will always be you.

I'll never love this way again.
I fear that this will be my becoming.
Your scent will always be the fragrance of every color that I can smell.
Like broken crayons,
damaged, but still creates colors in this hell of a life I have.  
Every memory of you won't fade.
I can still see the sky in your eyes even though it's midnight in a darken room.
My devotion, is all paid in sorrow and shame.

I'll never love this way again.
I do not seek for lesser versions of what I felt with you.
I do not crave any taste of someone's lips.
I do not seek any words from others that will comfort my heart.
I do not want anything from someone else.
Unless it is with you.