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"frustratingly" poems
I am Eternally exasperated Frequently frustrated Incessantly irate Perpetually perturbed Awfully ambivalent Forever fickle Frustratingly finnicky Laconicly labile Madly mercurial Virulently volatile And every other ******* adverb, adjective alliteration
0
Jun 29, 2015
Jun 29, 2015 at 10:02 PM UTC
Adjectives
I believe That writers are So brave Because each time They start writing Blotting ink onto Their paper Frustratingly typing on Their laptop They rip their heart out Of their chest And show the world What it's made of.
0
Oct 16, 2014
Oct 16, 2014 at 10:21 AM UTC
Bravery
the problem with dorm rooms is that there are hundreds of people se p ar at ed by paper-thin walls never interacting only existing simultaneously (which, is a cosmic interaction if you think about it.) sometimes I lay in my bed face against a cold paper wall and I think: what are these other people doing? in this awkward layout of beds and desks in the earlylate hours of the nightday are some sleeping frantically working drunk in their beds laying frustratingly awake awkwardly masturbating awkwardly ignoring the awkward ************ having cramped sex sleeping in the lounge to avoid said *** being had crying and homesick consoling a homesick friend too high to sleep too exhausted to be awake or are some just as awake as I, wondering sleepily, what I am doing on the other side of the wall?
0
Nov 12, 2012
Nov 12, 2012 at 5:00 PM UTC
through the thin walls of founders hall
I believe That writers are So brave Because each time They start writing Blotting ink onto Their paper Frustratingly typing on Their laptop Frustratingly typing on Their laptop They rip their heart out Of their chest And show the world What it's made of.
0
Oct 17, 2014
Oct 17, 2014 at 10:05 AM UTC
bravery
*"A lightning flash... then night! Fleeting beauty By whose glance I was suddenly reborn, Will I see you no more before eternity?”* -Charles Baudelaire, "To a Passerby" The material of the scene burns and grays, burns and grays in my mind: City soot in the frost. Cracked plastic. Broken glass. Cheek creases where you said your name. Salt stains on a denim cuff. Scruff. Tartan scarf. Navy wool. Feather down, laces, leggings, a buckle. Teeth, fleece, a crumpled hotel matchbook. No heat lamp here, where we wait and meet, wait and meet on the windiest night. Would you scoff if I said "Love is two strangers trading fire.” Smaller matter, now, an Altoid tin of cherished ashes. I have it, and it murmurs your lines to me, when I crave that kind of burn. A familiar ice cube down the back of the neck. These thoughts have sunken—a bag of pennies in my gut like a phantom step on a dark staircase, or the imitation of death in a dream. Saying something about the lateness of the 16, You cupped your hand, to shelter the flame. I try to remember the melody. The harp strings at the nape of my neck sang mid-shiver, and you said something else, which I couldn’t hear over the choir under my hat. This missing line is my mind’s one sound conception of Infinity. And that’s enough for flint. A lightning flash…then night! A flame frustratingly lit, but profoundly felt. A gasp, a gust like a god's grace, like a song. Like just enough time for a quick addict’s fix, like the length of a single, ****** matchstick. Will I see you no more before eternity? And do you by chance have a light?
0
Oct 22, 2014
Oct 22, 2014 at 5:04 PM UTC
Trading Fire
*"A lightning flash... then night! Fleeting beauty By whose glance I was suddenly reborn, Will I see you no more before eternity?”* -Charles Baudelaire, "To a Passerby" The material of the scene burns and grays, burns and grays in my mind: City soot in the frost. Cracked plastic. Broken glass. Cheek creases where you said your name. Salt stains on a denim cuff. Scruff. Tartan scarf. Navy wool. Feather down, laces, leggings, a buckle. Teeth, fleece, a crumpled hotel matchbook. No heat lamp here, where we wait and meet, wait and meet on the windiest night. Would you scoff if I said "Love is two strangers trading fire.” Smaller matter, now, an Altoid tin of cherished ashes. I have it, and it murmurs your lines to me, when I crave that kind of burn. A familiar ice cube down the back of the neck. These thoughts have sunken—a bag of pennies in my gut like a phantom step on a dark staircase, or the imitation of death in a dream. Saying something about the lateness of the 16, You cupped your hand, to shelter the flame. I try to remember the melody. The harp strings at the nape of my neck sang mid-shiver, and you said something else, which I couldn’t hear over the choir under my hat. This missing line is my mind’s one sound conception of Infinity. And that’s enough for flint. A lightning flash…then night! A flame frustratingly lit, but profoundly felt. A gasp, a gust like a god's grace, like a song. Like just enough time for a quick addict’s fix, like the length of a single, ****** matchstick. Will I see you no more before eternity? And do you by chance have a light?
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40
Taken a hiatus               Unhappy with the latest                                          Words                    Put onto pages          They've not been the greatest                    Need a vacation                   Find that part that                              CAN                                Be                           Creative         Frustratingly                           Average    Make them look                            Pretty    Hide they're not                            Witty Ignore they're not                            Gritty                          Hello Poetry            When you hold a committee                          To judge me                            Take pity                          Before you                            Unleash                               Your                             Critique           Remember I'm only running at                           Fifty-three                             Percent                            Capacity                           Creatively   I think I'm due an upgrade       To iron out these kinks. Plug Me In To Sleep.
0
Aug 1, 2014
Aug 1, 2014 at 4:06 PM UTC
Hiatus
Taken a hiatus               Unhappy with the latest                                          Words                    Put onto pages          They've not been the greatest                    Need a vacation                   Find that part that                              CAN                                Be                           Creative         Frustratingly                           Average    Make them look                            Pretty    Hide they're not                            Witty Ignore they're not                            Gritty                          Hello Poetry            When you hold a committee                          To judge me                            Take pity                          Before you                            Unleash                               Your                             Critique           Remember I'm only running at                           Fifty-three                             Percent                            Capacity                           Creatively   I think I'm due an upgrade       To iron out these kinks. Plug Me In To Sleep.
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38
Somedays I don't feel like writing and it worries me because 'Writers write everday -- real ones, at least.' I fear being ordinary, which is tasteless because maybe being ordinary is what I need. The appeal of snapbacks and hipster haircuts is starting to make more sense. Blending into a crowd might suit me better; to be invisible but to no longer be insecure. Rap lyrics make more sense, even though I can't relate; these words are my sedation, these clothes aren't armor but marketable camouflage. My words have been said before, but that might be okay because I'd hate to torment myself wondering about my relevance. So, to move on, I write, and I write, and I write to pander and to conform. Substituting thought for appealing diction and strong imagery, afraid to show myself because maybe you're too much like me, which, surely, would eat me alive.
0
Jul 22, 2016
Jul 22, 2016 at 10:49 PM UTC
Frustratingly Ordinary
reaching for you is like reaching for the back of my palm with fingers of the same hand... i just can't you are so close close to my heart yet so hard to reach so frustratingly far... your honey sweet words never desist me but you are distant away still i wish you'd stay the world separates us you barely know me but you know me more than anyone i've told though you know nothing about me since i've told you no more but you know me so much more this feeling is bitter this feeling is... our profane love
0
Nov 6, 2014
Nov 6, 2014 at 5:55 AM UTC
Profane Love
Passing Tweetsie on my way home from work. In the Food Lion, low-calorie chicken soup cans under tinny lights. Sick-green avocados and riding-hood bacon celebrated the day all your shoes moved in. Can't we pair those together again? The blank space on the floor like a good friend's face seen without glasses, washed out. Frustratingly, the smell of my own laundry. mi colada es su colada Ha! By the pond, the gazebo we never spent time in but might have. The dusk-dark evergreens with delicate lace tips like spidery lingerie leggings ripped wide open, lingering, recovered from the trash can. Rainbow polka-dot gift wrap on my light-blue chest, flagship of her left-behinds; A tawny feather earring, the lonely fore-mast lacking a mate and Demure winter-cabin-smile, framed: green scarf turned seaweed, the face-down figurehead drowns.
0
Feb 22, 2014
Feb 22, 2014 at 12:57 PM UTC
THE LIVE-IN LIST (Dirge)
I have known, and I have cared for, those who think rebuilding a person is love which is quite nice in theory but then, I became destroyed. I was a project, a house of cards that had fallen and frustratingly needed put back together, elevated the way the moon gets lifted from grass or a friendship necklace lurches from my lover’s body. His collarbone peak separating the relationship from the heart. When someone told me love can be piecing each other back together, I just thought of how it could be crumbling together, too — mixed up, mixed blood, if he were to die, my necklace would disintegrate with his tongue. We would cremate sterling silver and even then, he would not be destroyed. We are not scientists, we are two people who kiss together like how two wooden-sticks’ll use the same drum to create music. There may be splinters, may peel but can still make sound. No one takes a drumstick to the repair shop, they just buy a new one — I want that to be love. Stop trying to fix me and touch my everything, all my broken parts.
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Aug 26, 2013
Aug 26, 2013 at 5:02 PM UTC
the recycle bin
Meat You make me want to get high and end something. Your childhood shouldn’t be mine. You apathetic **** I know you don’t care. That’s why it hurts. You’re father was gone, Maybe that would be better. You’re here, but not for me. You’re just a huge tease. Without words you flay. Furl me in a calm. Just to show what worth you have of me. I’d rather be whipped. At least then you’d use me. Your always at my leash. If I try to pull you to me. You’re never at the end. Endless release of my constant fill. Never seems to bring benevolence. Slamming fists, yelling to a burn, Biting until blood, hurting until bruised. You’re a tick I can’t rip out. Burrowed and ***** I can rip my skin open. Dig in. You’d never be found. I’d amputate your from me. With a saw, knife, or bullet. You **** me dry, and never pass a nod. I can’t scream into another. Or cry with someone. They’re nothing to me. Cause they’re nothing to you. I have no one. Monkey see, monkey do. There’s always something absent. Turgid and deeply rooted. It hollows my chest when I feel it. I’ll never taste it. Or have the chance to waste it. Finding someone to abridge. Is frustratingly crippling. I sting just thinking about it. You knee capped me. I’ll never love. I’ll never be loved. You made me meat. You made everyone meat.
0
Mar 30, 2021
Mar 30, 2021 at 4:23 PM UTC
Meat
Waking in darkness to brainstorming moments Warm under covers on this freezing morn, Recalling the instants of yesterday’s sequences, How they developed and how they were born…… *“Moving with grace in a form fitting garment, Curves in the shadow light tauntingly near, Beautiful lines in a moment of weakness Titillate senses erotically clear.” “Watching the mouth of the bigoted warbler, Watching him spout his idolatry spiels, Rhetoric of mind bending, **** licking garbage Image of self is the place that he kneels.” “Urgency now with insurances deadline Making provision for payments now due, Juggle the baksheesh for paying the piper Or the cruelty of bankers will cauterise you!” “Laughter arouses the happiest moments Merriment opens the faces so well, Emotively gracious the giving of laughter Contagiously, wonderfully ringing the bell.” "Uncomfortably caught in the midst of an untruth Unconscionably really, can’t call it a lie, Got caught in momentum of tale in the telling Upsetting me now to the point where I cry.” "Can’t recall why, but I know there’s a matter, Ripping my britches to try to recall…. Something importantly, now to be dealt with Frustratingly lost in the fog of it all.” "Harmonies rise like a mist in the temple Delicate cadences rise and they fall, I wonder why God allows this unbeliever To sing with the Angels in his Holy hall?” “Running my fingertips over her curvature Feeling the ***** line plummet to fall Knowing the thrill of elicit collusion Anticipate promise of wanting it all.”* Sudden alarm in the midst of a waking Urgency calls at the dawn of the day, Heaving my soul into frost waiting fingers Leaving my dreams in the warmth where they lay. Marshalg “Pukehana Paradise” Auckland NZ. 22 June 2013
0
Jun 21, 2013
Jun 21, 2013 at 6:40 PM UTC
Reflections of Yesterday
Waking in darkness to brainstorming moments Warm under covers on this freezing morn, Recalling the instants of yesterday’s sequences, How they developed and how they were born…… *“Moving with grace in a form fitting garment, Curves in the shadow light tauntingly near, Beautiful lines in a moment of weakness Titillate senses erotically clear.” “Watching the mouth of the bigoted warbler, Watching him spout his idolatry spiels, Rhetoric of mind bending, **** licking garbage Image of self is the place that he kneels.” “Urgency now with insurances deadline Making provision for payments now due, Juggle the baksheesh for paying the piper Or the cruelty of bankers will cauterise you!” “Laughter arouses the happiest moments Merriment opens the faces so well, Emotively gracious the giving of laughter Contagiously, wonderfully ringing the bell.” "Uncomfortably caught in the midst of an untruth Unconscionably really, can’t call it a lie, Got caught in momentum of tale in the telling Upsetting me now to the point where I cry.” "Can’t recall why, but I know there’s a matter, Ripping my britches to try to recall…. Something importantly, now to be dealt with Frustratingly lost in the fog of it all.” "Harmonies rise like a mist in the temple Delicate cadences rise and they fall, I wonder why God allows this unbeliever To sing with the Angels in his Holy hall?” “Running my fingertips over her curvature Feeling the ***** line plummet to fall Knowing the thrill of elicit collusion Anticipate promise of wanting it all.”* Sudden alarm in the midst of a waking Urgency calls at the dawn of the day, Heaving my soul into frost waiting fingers Leaving my dreams in the warmth where they lay. Marshalg “Pukehana Paradise” Auckland NZ. 22 June 2013
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44
THOUGHTS Days consumed with images and memories of you... hugs,smiles, jokes,laughs, stares, sweet kisses so thoughts continue. Looking towards the constellations deep contemplations of whether or not we are destined to be controls my entity. Distracted by the funky melondies of untalented singers disrupt my yearning heartbeat. At times the feeling of flight overpowers me but there's something about you that leads to the constant cancellations of my many trips. See shorty doo *** rolling oowops... you intrigued my mind, captured my soul and now your so close to holding my heart that it seems unreal. I don't fall easily! You're piercing my heart without my consent. You shot me in the back and I became limp to all my Desires all the while I was looking at you,eye to eye, Yes this was the entire time. Confusing right, frustratingly enough its pretty complex this surprise attack. I have yet to start the healing process but what's even worse is Im not absolutely sure if I want to experience that, Or if your even ready yet! Guess Not... You said you'll take a Raincheck Just Speak Ta'resa Pearson
0
Feb 19, 2013
Feb 19, 2013 at 12:18 PM UTC
Thoughts of a Insecure Heart!
It's the knife of not getting what I want it's Smelling your chest, inhaling your scent Your sweat drives me wild, I'm jealous I'm not the same for you and Feeling you on me, your palms tracing down my skin, Christening shivers with your fingerprints, My body melding into yours Frustratingly unfair, and you don't feel the same, and why- In the library, when I disconnected myself from your chest Even though every smell of you was ****** and Every heartbeat was a syringe, I lean up and whisper I want you, And you tell me to be quiet. You slay romance. And in over a year of us, and no one else (And I wonder, what would elses be like?) Under a thousand days but more than 500 In an imperfect symmetry of silent games and angry longing I want to make love to you quietly, I want you to instigate it I want to lie and feel wanted, not be reprimanded for every stray moan I want you to want to hear me With such a burning anger, The unfairness that I want it all for me, and all for you I want us to be seamless. So fluid and streamlined that it's impossible to tell where You begin and I end.
0
Sep 21, 2013
Sep 21, 2013 at 12:37 AM UTC
On the other hand-
"It's just so hard to live with someone who is         so ******* miserable         all the ******* time." "He's always been such a frustratingly         depressing guy." "I don't like you." "You do nothing. You're useless." "What do you mean, you feel like a failure?         Never mind. I don't want to talk         about that." "You've got so much potential." "Well, you're a ray of ******* sunshine." "Have you tried being happy?" "You're giving off vibes of tension and         frustration." "The kids are scared of you." "Jesus! What are you so sad about?!" They're not wrong. Eggshells,         eggshells,                 step gently around Joe. I don't bring joy,     and I don't get more likeable. I am miserable.         I just wish I didn't bring others                 down with me. No, they're not wrong, but I really wish they were.
0
Nov 20, 2020
Nov 20, 2020 at 11:10 AM UTC
sad sack
I wish it was easy for me to do what you do, But I have never been very good at opening myself up. You do it with such elegance. Your every word begs for attention and leaks a little of you into the air. People breathe you like oxygen, and have come to need you even more. Life. Your eyes tell me what mine could be like If I dared to follow in your Rebellious, graceful, Albeit complicated footsteps; once again you are the first one on the dance floor, But the beat I hear most clearly when I'm around you Is not the one you inspire Club One to clap to. One million loose-lipped ladies and never a line about you, because no one has it in them to talk about what isn't in you. You are a poet's dream. You are pure beauty in its rarest form--sincerity. You are every coin thrown in a hat, every victory yell, every unexpected smile at the turn of something new, every bird who refuses to fly in a pattern. You are what's inside every note. You are fiercely loved. You are frustratingly, and unfathomably, too good for words. and only the sunshine deserves you.
0
Jun 17, 2013
Jun 17, 2013 at 7:41 PM UTC
Catalina
When I used to read ****** romance novels or online fiction (we all do it when we're lonely, don't lie) Before I was in a stable relationship myself, I'd noticed that when love is described it usually unfolds the same way. it's a warm ball of light in your chest. it starts out small, unravels, and becomes so big and filling that it radiates through you. hotter than the sun. or at least, that's what they say. It always irked me to read, because surely love is indescribable? you can't spin the roller coaster of love into a straight forward strain of thought, enough to actually explain love fully in all it's capacity and magnificent energy. No little ***** of light could match the intensity of naked love. This here, is the problem I am having. you can't write it down. all of those beautiful things written by others before? they don't compare. no song, poem, verse or bible passage can compete with how I feel for you. and at the time these cliched descriptions were enough to sate the hopeless romantic inside me but now, now that I am aware of love I can't abide the misrepresentation it gets. Nothing compares to you (Ok, maybe Sinead O Connor had the right idea...) and because nothing compares to you, I can't write. I have no songs to sing and nothing to write because I'm happy. I'm more than happy... I'm beside myself. I can't capture you, my feelings for you, or the magic of our connection in any art form. supposedly it's because it is it's own art form. our love is art, priceless and constantly changing. It bothers me because I want to tell the world. I want to show them. I want to run up to all the lonely people, who felt like I felt and go "IT EXISTS! YOU WILL FIND IT! HOLD ON! DON'T LOSE HOPE!" because they need to know... they need to understand. but if love can't be expressed correctly, they will never understand. So to the lonely people ; Love is incomprehensible. It is life saving. It is frustratingly beautiful and unbelievable. it is every cliche you've ever heard of and much, much more. it is definitely not over rated. don't ever stop looking, don't ever give up hope. it's there and one day, you'll feel it too.
0
Apr 22, 2010
Apr 22, 2010 at 5:03 PM UTC
To The Lonely People
When I used to read ****** romance novels or online fiction (we all do it when we're lonely, don't lie) Before I was in a stable relationship myself, I'd noticed that when love is described it usually unfolds the same way. it's a warm ball of light in your chest. it starts out small, unravels, and becomes so big and filling that it radiates through you. hotter than the sun. or at least, that's what they say. It always irked me to read, because surely love is indescribable? you can't spin the roller coaster of love into a straight forward strain of thought, enough to actually explain love fully in all it's capacity and magnificent energy. No little ***** of light could match the intensity of naked love. This here, is the problem I am having. you can't write it down. all of those beautiful things written by others before? they don't compare. no song, poem, verse or bible passage can compete with how I feel for you. and at the time these cliched descriptions were enough to sate the hopeless romantic inside me but now, now that I am aware of love I can't abide the misrepresentation it gets. Nothing compares to you (Ok, maybe Sinead O Connor had the right idea...) and because nothing compares to you, I can't write. I have no songs to sing and nothing to write because I'm happy. I'm more than happy... I'm beside myself. I can't capture you, my feelings for you, or the magic of our connection in any art form. supposedly it's because it is it's own art form. our love is art, priceless and constantly changing. It bothers me because I want to tell the world. I want to show them. I want to run up to all the lonely people, who felt like I felt and go "IT EXISTS! YOU WILL FIND IT! HOLD ON! DON'T LOSE HOPE!" because they need to know... they need to understand. but if love can't be expressed correctly, they will never understand. So to the lonely people ; Love is incomprehensible. It is life saving. It is frustratingly beautiful and unbelievable. it is every cliche you've ever heard of and much, much more. it is definitely not over rated. don't ever stop looking, don't ever give up hope. it's there and one day, you'll feel it too.
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14
It feels nice to  Finally have tears  Fall; After weeks of Borderline crying  But  Frustratingly nothing Coming. Salty tears Staining my cheeks Dribbling, Spilling, Running from  My lashes Feels free.
0
Jun 14, 2014
Jun 14, 2014 at 7:09 PM UTC
Finally crying!
Goodbye. It pains me to say this to you because I honestly don’t want it to come from me but I have to. So goodbye. We were in the brink of something so beautiful but you chose to end it because of something I still find too shallow. It honestly makes me wonder how it will be if we pushed through but the fact that it was so easy for you to let me go made me think that, “I guess it won’t end well if we continue.” Fears will always be present, babe. The key is not to let it get to you but it did, and in a bad way. I can’t even begin to imagine how our life would be like though, you know, if we continue. And the more days go by, the more I doubt myself if I want this. Well, scratch that. I want this so badly, but I don’t think it will work. I am torn between giving this a shot with all my might and just letting this go because I know in the months to come, the pain will be more unbearable. Our personalities just don’t mix well with this frustratingly uncontrollable issue. You fear that when you leave me soon, we will be worse than what we are now. That’s why you think it will be easier for you to leave without having any extra baggage, me. My friends called you a coward, but some people just don’t understand. They don’t understand the depth of the situation because simply, they’re not in it. They can say all they want to and anticipate how it’s like being in our places right now but they’re never going to understand the pain and the feelings in between that go with the situation. They just don’t. We were a perfect match. And I guess because of that, we burnt out. I feel like there’s a huge void inside me and I can’t make any sense out of it, because we were never together but you made such a huge impact. We were, are, and will be nothing but an ALMOST. But if anything, I want to let you know how much I loved our little infinity capsuled in a span of 1 month. Many great things happened in that short amount of time that never happened in the years I’ve had with anyone else. And I will always be grateful for that. I now know that I deserve a love like that, and more. You showed me how it was to feel special and to be appreciated for who I am, flaws and all. I was the most beautiful girl in your eyes and I hope one day we'll find our way back and give our love another try. I hope that when that day comes, we'll continue our story rather than just leave it with an ellipsis. I guess I’ll still be here for you though, but in a different way. I’ll always be your cousin’s classmate who made your heart skip a beat at day one. I’ll always be the girl who knows how to make you laugh even when you’re not in the mood and I’ll always be that stubborn “almost” girlfriend who made you feel like you were the best “almost” boyfriend. Take care of yourself, big guy. Goodbye.
0
Jun 17, 2016
Jun 17, 2016 at 1:00 AM UTC
Nothing but an Almost
Goodbye. It pains me to say this to you because I honestly don’t want it to come from me but I have to. So goodbye. We were in the brink of something so beautiful but you chose to end it because of something I still find too shallow. It honestly makes me wonder how it will be if we pushed through but the fact that it was so easy for you to let me go made me think that, “I guess it won’t end well if we continue.” Fears will always be present, babe. The key is not to let it get to you but it did, and in a bad way. I can’t even begin to imagine how our life would be like though, you know, if we continue. And the more days go by, the more I doubt myself if I want this. Well, scratch that. I want this so badly, but I don’t think it will work. I am torn between giving this a shot with all my might and just letting this go because I know in the months to come, the pain will be more unbearable. Our personalities just don’t mix well with this frustratingly uncontrollable issue. You fear that when you leave me soon, we will be worse than what we are now. That’s why you think it will be easier for you to leave without having any extra baggage, me. My friends called you a coward, but some people just don’t understand. They don’t understand the depth of the situation because simply, they’re not in it. They can say all they want to and anticipate how it’s like being in our places right now but they’re never going to understand the pain and the feelings in between that go with the situation. They just don’t. We were a perfect match. And I guess because of that, we burnt out. I feel like there’s a huge void inside me and I can’t make any sense out of it, because we were never together but you made such a huge impact. We were, are, and will be nothing but an ALMOST. But if anything, I want to let you know how much I loved our little infinity capsuled in a span of 1 month. Many great things happened in that short amount of time that never happened in the years I’ve had with anyone else. And I will always be grateful for that. I now know that I deserve a love like that, and more. You showed me how it was to feel special and to be appreciated for who I am, flaws and all. I was the most beautiful girl in your eyes and I hope one day we'll find our way back and give our love another try. I hope that when that day comes, we'll continue our story rather than just leave it with an ellipsis. I guess I’ll still be here for you though, but in a different way. I’ll always be your cousin’s classmate who made your heart skip a beat at day one. I’ll always be the girl who knows how to make you laugh even when you’re not in the mood and I’ll always be that stubborn “almost” girlfriend who made you feel like you were the best “almost” boyfriend. Take care of yourself, big guy. Goodbye.
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9
One morning he found that age had arrived and moved in to stay like some unwelcome relative whose existence he had always doubted. Suddenly, the past retreated into a vast, unimaginable distance and youth became someone else. Even midlife was a stranger. Old things began to happen: his wife had a new husband and life; his grown children had futures and didn't come around much; the news became frustratingly familiar; *** devolved into ritual; the best cats were all dead like more of his friends each year. He woke for good at four AM after thin, elderly sleep and spent the early hours with bourbon, coffee, cigarettes and jazz. Age just smiled, had another drink, and made no move to leave. - mce
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Apr 8, 2015
Apr 8, 2015 at 7:30 AM UTC
New Roommate
the sun was coming up over the residential buildings of west philadelphia I couldn't remember where I was or how I had gotten there the bar almost a mile away from my current location I was sitting down afraid of the tumultuous nothing that clouded the last 6 hours and the vague scent of double whiskey's and coke still on my breath I couldn't recall how the night had ended the dulled flashes of memory were frustratingly brief but no one was awake yet and the city looked amazing in the day's nascent glow my head was ringing an amazing ache that spread rapidly downwards from my skull and I sat there for a little while contemplating the emptiness and what exactly I had done with myself one beautiful friday morning on the steps of Parker's barber shop I was brought back to life confused and alone it was a terrible miracle to still be alive with no money in my wallet as I began the long walk home
0
May 11, 2013
May 11, 2013 at 1:48 AM UTC
Lazarus
in a room full of strangers id still know my place is at the back ill keep my head down and look for the confidence i lack my days are filled with emptiness its been days of deafening silence and days with satisfying pain its been driving me insane regardless of a license but my nights are different theyre dull but blue theyre peaceful in a way but still my heart is filled with people i can talk to cause my heart is filled with strangers ive loved and its filled with strangers ive lost and now that i wanna talk about my ****** day i know that talking to them would come with a cost break your heart for me said the one i loved too much he doesnt smile nor does he frown he looks like we just plainly lost touch sing me a song you know i love said the love ive had that i had not taken care of she seems genuinely surprised when i told her i cant because i cant remember her favorite songs, the keys are all off lets be alone together said the one who thought i loved too little he cant look me in my eyes but hes holding onto my heart i held onto his hands and crushed my own heart, a things so fickle tell me the truth, not your truth said the love i never knew i could have shes strong and caring but i cant begin to understand her request i told her my truth is all i know and the truth is a thing i cant grab tell me a story, a good and happy one said the one i cant ever love truly my reflection stood in front of me, firm, unwavering unlike my faltering soul that begand crumbling fully and just like that im also a stranger on my own heart lost and fazed, confused and frustratingly hopeless cause my heart is filled with strangers i have loved and now its filled with acquaintances that will never love me back
0
Jul 2, 2018
Jul 2, 2018 at 10:38 AM UTC
heart filled with strangers
in a room full of strangers id still know my place is at the back ill keep my head down and look for the confidence i lack my days are filled with emptiness its been days of deafening silence and days with satisfying pain its been driving me insane regardless of a license but my nights are different theyre dull but blue theyre peaceful in a way but still my heart is filled with people i can talk to cause my heart is filled with strangers ive loved and its filled with strangers ive lost and now that i wanna talk about my ****** day i know that talking to them would come with a cost break your heart for me said the one i loved too much he doesnt smile nor does he frown he looks like we just plainly lost touch sing me a song you know i love said the love ive had that i had not taken care of she seems genuinely surprised when i told her i cant because i cant remember her favorite songs, the keys are all off lets be alone together said the one who thought i loved too little he cant look me in my eyes but hes holding onto my heart i held onto his hands and crushed my own heart, a things so fickle tell me the truth, not your truth said the love i never knew i could have shes strong and caring but i cant begin to understand her request i told her my truth is all i know and the truth is a thing i cant grab tell me a story, a good and happy one said the one i cant ever love truly my reflection stood in front of me, firm, unwavering unlike my faltering soul that begand crumbling fully and just like that im also a stranger on my own heart lost and fazed, confused and frustratingly hopeless cause my heart is filled with strangers i have loved and now its filled with acquaintances that will never love me back
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a million passerbys pass myriad of blurs and glimpses of life fleeting moment starstruck at someone's significant insignificance and insignificant significance a breathtaking epiphany the art of wondering is somehow frustratingly beautiful
0
Nov 21, 2019
Nov 21, 2019 at 6:32 PM UTC
peek
i hate myself in that resigned sort of way that it gets to the point where you don't care about anything. you'd rather destroy yourself all the way than go and fix up all those tiny little cracks that need stitching. i'm sorry that i run away from you every time you tell me you need me and i'm sorry that when i come back i pretend like it's never happened, as if you didn't spill your soul to me and i never selfishly shied away. you deserve someone better than me to speak with, someone better equipped to deal with everything. you need someone who wants life about all else, who can find beauty in everything and make sure that you are happy and help you. because, though i wish so much that i could, wish i knew how, i can't discourage you. i agree with you in that aspect. suicide seems like such a beautifully promising escape and even embarrassingly now, i crave it. that is why it is so frustratingly hard to find reasons for you not to. i'm sorry love i really really am and i can't seem to be able to put this any other way.
0
Jun 1, 2013
Jun 1, 2013 at 11:35 PM UTC
no more (better than me)
Every time i see you, my mind goes blank. Frustratingly, so do all the things i wish to say to you. For some reason, though, our memories still dance before my eyes. As i think maybe the same thing has happened to you, Curiously, i look into your ocean eyes. and what do i see? Emptiness. Dead. you killed us. i am dead to you.
0
Apr 25, 2013
Apr 25, 2013 at 11:54 PM UTC
effaced