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Julia Jul 2020
you have stars in your eyes
but i am only the night sky
so far from your reach
i am always denied
Julia Jul 2020
i wish i had
a way with words
to make you glad
and never hurt

when autumn leaves
cut through my arms
you were there
to heal my heart

and heartfelt smiles
you should know
you saved my life

i wish i could
help you see
just how much
you mean to me
Julia May 2020
in crowded rooms
and narrow halls
i've never felt
like i belong

i stare off
into the midst
of chattering people
that still feel bliss

i can't see
i can't hear
they tap my shoulder
but i'm no longer here

because it's dark now
i know you're gone
but i was right
and you were wrong

there is no place for me
there is no home
that's why i
should be alone
Julia May 2020
i want loneliness and freedom
but i still want to be loved
i'm unhappy and i'm unkind
but happy is something i never was

caught myself in my own arms
since nobody could handle the burden
of all my sorrow and my fears
it feels like i'm the only one hurting
Julia May 2020
i'm sad. but it's okay
i was sad yesterday
and i'll be sad tomorrow
but there's nobody here to see it
nobody to talk to
i'm crying. but it's okay
i cried yesterday
and i'll certainly cry tomorrow
but nobody will wipe away the tears
staining my dull face
i'm alone. but it's okay
i was alone yesterday
and i'll be alone tomorrow
but sometimes i'm trapped in dreams
wishing it wasn't so
Julia May 2020
i went outside today
hoping to feel something
i don't think the world
could ever be lovely

stuck inside my room
isn't all that bad
until i realized
how everything makes me sad

i don't want to see anymore
i don't want to talk
every time i try
i'm left alone in the dark
Julia Feb 2020
i want to be pretty
i want to be thin
i want to be
only bones and skin
i want people to worry
when i walk by
i want people to wonder
how i'm still alive
i don't eat for six days
and feel guilty on the seventh
i purge for three more
and binge on the eleventh
i wish you would worry
i wish you would care
if you don't, one day
you won't see me there
i'll die of starvation
messed up, insane, wrong
but you won't even notice
that i am long gone
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