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Julia Feb 3
1
one look
one smile
one fear
one desire
one shot
one ****
one heart
one will
one thought
one mind
one love
one life
Julia Feb 3
i can't make you love me
if you don't want to
running around chasing feelings
is all i can do

i can't make you love me
unless you want to
show me a sign, give me a reason
to hold onto you
Julia Feb 3
you
you will never want me
like i want you

you will never need me
like i need you

you will never hear me
like i hear you

you will never see me
like i see you

you will never think of me
like i think of you

you will never look at me
like i look at you

you will never love me
like i love you
Julia Feb 3
i want to be pretty
i want to be thin
i want to be
only bones and skin
i want people to worry
when i walk by
i want people to wonder
how i'm still alive
i don't eat for six days
and feel guilty on the seventh
i purge for three more
and binge on the eleventh
i wish you would worry
i wish you would care
if you don't, one day
you won't see me there
i'll die of starvation
messed up, insane, wrong
but you won't even notice
that i am long gone
Julia Jan 28
i wish you would
miss me

i wish you would
kiss me

i need you to
miss me

i need you to
kiss me
Julia Jan 28
9 minutes was all it took
for me to fall in love with you
once i met your eyes for the first time
and you gazed at me
for a moment i actually thought
maybe you could like me, too
but you don't
i try not to be too obvious
about my feelings
but it's getting harder each day
9 minutes was all it took
for me to come and talk to you
i wish i could have told you
how i feel
instead i wished you a happy new year
and left to stumble in the cold
all alone
forever
thinking of how different things might be
if i wasn't so shy
i dream about you every night
when i can actually sleep
i'm swallowed by the darkness
and i really thought
you might be the one to save me
but i don't think you are
i wish you'd give me a sign
to show me that you could still be mine
i cling onto any detail
grasping onto words that dont matter
holding on for dear life
9 minutes was all it took
for me to fall in love with you
Julia Jan 28
i am not religious
and somehow i attract
sinners
that string me along
and break my heart
knowing that i'll
forgive them
because i don't deserve
love at all
so i cling desperately
to anybody who shows me
any affection at all
even though
they lie to me
they defile me
they cheat on me
and then apologize
they were drunk
they weren't thinking straight
they never really loved me anyway
and i take in
these broken people
and nurture them
until they're healed enough
to turn their backs on me
but who is going to
save me?
while they run off with my friend
or somebody much better than me
i am left to pick up the pieces
of my own shattered heart
and they come back to say
they still love me
but i don't trust anyone
anymore
and i walk away
somehow
i end up being
the villian
and blamed for playing the
victim
and so i'd say
to those who have wronged me -
*******
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