Ridicule me all you want,
Because I know you don't understand.
But never defend me, acting like you do understand.
Now that would truly be disgraceful,
Because I know you never can.

I wish you’d write some happy words,
cause God know’s I need some now;

It’s been awhile since we’ve talked,
but I still know you somehow;

I wish you’d write some happy words,
do you still remember how?

When I hear the music of my past;
          An echo of the person I used to be,
          I wish I could speak to it as it does to me,
And tell it notes to play so it may last.

A melody of perfect beat and scale,
          Imperfect as I play it back now;
          Music then, and broken hearts now,
Still magic of the moment, never fail.

And even with the sorrowful notes,
          The change from G to E minor, slow,
          And my love for the symphony grow,
As I play each beautiful note I wrote.

My life, is a lament to Her creation,
          All the happiness that seeds,
          And the sadness that breeds;
It is all true, and never imitation.

And when Her music plays with mine,
          The harmonizing ring of morning bells,
          Of forests, creatures, and ocean swells,
She rules 'til the end of time, with a single line:

1
A child asks me, "Is there life after death?"
I wish I had an answer that would not crush him infinitely,
But I can't bring myself you say, "Yes!"
He is so ignorant, so empty of knowledge happily,
And I'm so filled with envy.

I am unsure, that is the curse I bare,
At least with a definite leaning to fact or faith,
Onward may one go, but I am stuck at a crossroads

Is it real? Is what's real good?
My mortal mind can never be sure
In the end I will know,
I cannot go on until the end when I cannot.

From what I've seen,
Not a lot but enough to question,
I do not know, yet my mind is keen,
If I don't choose, from both I face rejection.

What are we,
Fact, or fiction?
That is the question.
What are we?

2
In the beginning, god created the heavens and the earth,
A vile creation, abandoned long ago by the Lord.
The place which so violently ripped apart with all mortal hurt,
Our blood and guts hang out for ridicule of our gore.

The soft green flesh of the world, eaten off by humanity,
It reveals the cold stone skeleton with flesh all gone;
It smells of cold black death from years before we.
We roam the dry barren wasteland, walking on earth-bone.

See our half-life is also merely a half-death,
Be what we can, but ourselves we should always stay.
Whether, we succeed, fail, wither, prevail,
It is beautiful that dream in the night, of better days.

Whether we are divided with many around us,
For with others then we may share,
Or united with none in sight of us,
With ourselves we may stare to the empty universe
Go forth into the abyss, singing a human verse.

3
Before I go, I cannot sleep
Until I leave myself painted on everyone I know
And all the paper is writ upon by me,
telling my story forevermore and completely so.

I will never leave a verse within myself,
Expel every brilliant word from my head;
So that I may one day be taken from a dusty bookshelf
Long after I am dead.

Whatever we do in the moment is nothing,
But not to us.
Whatever we create in the moment is everything,
But not to us.

It is you to me,
And me to you,
And the world to come,
If stay us true.

We are all gods when we create.

4
So this be it,
My final verse to be writ;
Nothing left to be said,
Only a song of myself to be read.

Within everyone I see myself
They are my life, and all my memories
Within them I see myself
As I once was and what I might become
Where I might be and have once been before

The me I see in them all
I wish I could be
for once upon a nighttime
When I don't know who I am
I can look to all of them
To light my path for a lifetime.

All of you are all of us
And in each other we must trust
As we walk this path together
Moonlit valleys, calming wind, wisps of wheat
Wonders of the world beneath our feet
Walking ever onward until we fall to dust
And become the land on which we walk
Around and around,
to the earth forever bound.
Until the end, atop
Our resting place.

Gilded strand on the silent shore
Without a wave to break upon it
The sea rests calm, my heart at war
In wait of the tides to consume love writ

Waters rest though and my love will stay
My love will decay on this fading strand
Before you wash away the words I say
I'll have written again with my weary hand

Even as the sun descends fast on your blue
And the moonrisen glow my night softly lit
I'll shed my feelings to the sand anew
In case your waves break at dawn to it

And once you find my love that lay here in sand
My only expectance is for you to understand

Real life has no filter;
It's sweet and bitter,
     but mostly sweet.

Savour. every. moment.

See life as it is —
a stream of passion
that runs fast and
then dry. So go paint
the sky. no excuses.
paint the sky. do it.

I don't want to leave;
it was just getting good.

Also at dawn do I long for the night,
You are naive but still you are right.

It's the glow of moons and stars,
The comets that streak the sky,
Our place, center between Venus and Mars,
And all the galaxies which pass us by;

They are all shining bright for you to see,
So let's gaze the night indefinitely.

Beautiful words won't save my dreams,
They're so far from what they mean;
They might be silent, or thoughts of another,
But not mine they way I imagined --

I leave the page ***** and used,
Unclear poetry of my past abused;
I am no brighter than ink,
No more pure than the empty page --

Silence is always on my tongue
While all I am inside is unsung;
I might be emptiness or not,
You'll never know, will you?

Through the reaching leaves, the broken sunbeams scatter over the green sea below. Breezes carry life's sounds through the air. The grass sweeps the souls of my young feet.
I am within it all, and it is all within me.

The sound of leaves
Listen as they whisper
To the wind of trees
Blow through the forest on through sorrow
Leaves that fall given back life they borrow
Wonder of the silence
And the subtlety of nature at rest
A moment of virtue
That remains uncaressed.
Beauty of endless autumn breezes
And cold quiet winter freezes
The birth of spring when nature reignites
And the setting sun of summer nights.
Stars gaze the earth as we gaze them
Wonders reflecting one another
Eyes, silver stare sight
Shining bright in the watery night
Like a silent black sea unbroken
Holds most beautiful words unspoken.

The touch of the rain
Soothing soft embrace
I can't remember happiness
When my heart craves sorrow
And the craving is bliss
Even still with a bitter taste
Still worth the cold, wetness
Because if I may feel, it's better than not
And I will enjoy it, not with haste.

my daughter wore
     a white dress
          to school today;

     it now looks awful
          red on her.

When midnight dawns will you be brave?
When silence leaves your lips this eve,
Will you be the same as you are today?
And I’d never thought you’d ever leave;
I was naive in my hope, in my mind,
And soon like the tides rolling in,
You’ll be with the Earth cold, intwined,
Greeting, grieving — the passing pin,

As the needle sew, in and out, to and fro,
And into the ground we all go so quick,
Before the reclaiming roots of death show,
And take you deep into the forest thick:
        Know that you will never pass —
        Not while our love for you lasts.

A window into my mind shows a bleak scene
Gallows stand in a graveyard of my dead hearts
Cold with autumn winds is the season it dies again
It's dying season again
The crows gather on the skeletal trees
And on the iron fence peaks
The sky floods a grey sea

It's amazing how you hold the lever
The one that kills this love forever
Do you dare to pull
And send another heart of mine under
Or will you clear away these clouds of thunder

It will happen one day though
One day the love will go
I wonder what happens when this graveyard is full
And there's nowhere to bury my hanging heart
The swaying body stops with a lull
The love will not go away though its dead, fallen apart
I'm stuck on this one, it won't go away
Until I go too on my dying day

Is this true love?

You've made yourself distant
Still, what I feel is no different.

But I cannot change what you chose
You've flown your path scarlet lark
Followed moonlight as the sun rose
And I'm still preaching to the dark.

The echo of your fleeting song now tears me apart
The song that gave life to my broken heart.

Forever, will my cries be in your name
Following the melody of your soul
Because from the shadow of you I came
And a return is inevitable to lecherous roles.

When his heart is overcome with the cold of winter
A light shines through the falling snow
Accompanied by the melody of the lone hunter
Playing for the silent night, his only foe

Alone, without himself, the wolves stalking closer
Acceptance of a life ending and nothing expected
Tonight on the eve of his death, he thinks of her
The dimming light of his fire, beautifully prophetic

She who can dismiss his deepest fears
Even with all that will come to pass
With the deepest memory held dear
Of her love, greater than nature's wrath

Faced his foe with courage in her name
He laid his head on a softest pillow of snow
Smile on his face, resting in peace, they came
And the strength she gave she'll never know

I've come to lay my arms down,
So take me quietly into crowded streets,
Set me free in amongst the bustling town,
No Resistance. I'm beaten and weak.

You'll see me here again
At the end of the dock,
In the morning mist;

Waiting for soothing rain
As waves crash the rocks,
Yet I remain the Optimist;

For when I breathe a sigh of sorrow,
I trust my sun will shine tomorrow.

The Question: Was it right?
Eludes my comprehension.

For It, was the cold wind at my back that i'd never see
It, was desperation
It, was the darkness fallen upon me.
It, was the spectre that encompassed all the monsters of my nightmares.

However, It, was the summer breeze that set me free
It, was my salvation
It, was the brightness of dawn upon me
It, was the angel who showed me the world of dreams and the pathway there.

But the Question still eludes my comprehension.

It was right,
There is no doubt,
What remains unanswered: What is the true question?

The road that lies ahead is a long one. Many have traveled it before and I can see them at the end. Although there are many obstacles along the way, bridges I must mend before crossing, potholes that slow me down, and inns that tempt me to stay awhile — I must resist and persist and carry on, or I might never reach my destination before the sun falls over the horizon.

Drifting on a moonlit sea
Siren sings her song to me
The Lullaby of remedy

I cannot escape her bliss
She has all I miss
All that makes me reminisce

Take me in now siren's song
Life without love is too long.

I've fallen away from the beautiful,
     And lost the light of day;
The night now claims my wither'd soul,
     My heart will silence pay.
Part the seas which sway'd me so,
     Sailed the golden course, I did not;
Swallowed whole into the depths below,
     For greed then had me caught.

Where may lie my body still,
     If nowhere I am found?
In deep waters She'll take the ****,
     No grave within the ground!
Alas, my time is all but spent,
Life so swiftly came and went.

They clasped their hands together,
and rest their worked brains
Thinking that everyone around them is insane,

A homeward bound subway train,
And they're rattling change to their ears
Convincing themselves they're not all the same.

A humble gulp of insecurity to ease the stress,
The street car travels on with great unrest.
A twitch, and a cough, but no one admits any word.

They halt at their homes. Disembark the train and settle down to watch TV shows.

The lights down low, the flickering box of rerun shows flashes out for the night.

They're all tired, and close their eyes with one another.
That copy, copy, copy,
Is a never-failed routine,
And they'll repeat it again,
Thinking old days are new.

They'll wake, they'll wear dress shoes,
and suits, and sing a silent blues.

Where comfort suits them,
They'll rot in the same old rut. Together.

These here, these great seas,
All the poets have come to you;
and stood in awe before vast pleasing views,
Of tempests wrought great sorrow,
Of skies filled with ore and silver light,
Of deep unknown and questioning existence,
Of gods, and heavens more vast than you,
Of who sails beyond the horizon,
Of the winds and scents of your shores,
Of endless sands to set foot upon,
Of all the arcane myths and lores!

How may I greet these great seas any differently?
So that I may cause a shift in the tides?
Alas, dreams far grander than I, these are;
The tides will shift as they may,
And every soul will be swept away.

The trees whisper to me
In the cool autumn wind;
They comfort me within
And let me walk amongst them
Freely and effortlessly.

The buildings shout at me
Echoes from the roaming gas animals;
They make me fear myself
And block me from places I want to go;
They are the roots of insecurity within me;
Posters of praised artificial pseudo-perfection,
Draped on billboarded roof-sides
That give me a place to find death quickly.

Here they fall,
    As words they lay;
Like rain on leaves,
    Then drift away—

New ones come
     Lonesome and weak;
Shrugged off by the old,
     Obese and bleak—

Stillness, then shock
     Illuminate my mind;
Scape of rusted reveries,
     Desolate and unkind—

Hallucinations by and by,
      And I chase their light;
Dreams and adorations,
     Faint whispers in the night—

Here they fall,
    As words they lay;
Like rain on leaves,
    Then drift away—

New ones come
     Lonesome and weak;
Shrugged off by the old,
     Obese and bleak—

Stillness, then shock
     Illuminates my mind;
A scape of rusted reveries,
     Desolate and unkind—

Hallucinations by and by,
      And I chase their light;
Dreams and adorations,
     Faint whispers in the night—

I know you know not the pain you cause me
It is of my unique delicate heart that it grows
I try to bear it silently, in hopes that it never shows

You have a beautiful life and I wish not to impede with pity
Born of nature, I cannot despise any one soul for wrong
Why would I?  
Why would I ever disgrace the innocence of ignorance?

The train rolls to a stop in front of the station. I peer out the window through the steam at the people. Some getting on, some off. But they are all on their own journey and it doesn't end nor does it begin with this change in direction.  Still I wonder if I should get off now, or should I wait for a nicer stop ahead?

Desperately holding on to the end
Wondering where the time had gone
The part of me that never mends
Regrets of the loss, the distant one.

I think I can push back against time's shove
Years go by and I think it's been only a day
Because the image of you, the touch of your love,
The sound of your voice, never fades away.

Finding the monstrous limbs to sever
The ones that keep holding on to you
The ones that made me ugly as ever
A beast overgrown with love too true.

Now I am tamed, no more self-attacks
Human once again, never to look back.

And I had no idea that you could bleed so much for me.
When you're tied to a feeling,
And it's hard to believe, I don't in anything,
And I trust my heart when it says:
"Let it go, let it go. Let it go, let it go."

Standing in the shadows healing the scars you endured for me.
I can't see you're still bleeding,
And it's hard to believe, I don't see anything,
And I trust my mind when it says:
"I don't know, I don't know. I don't know, I don't know."

Swimming in the seas of your blood you spilled for me.
I never notice the tide's rising,
And it's hard to believe, I don't feel anything,
And I trust in my lungs when they say:
"Breathe in slow, breathe in slow. Breathe in slow, breathe in slow."

And it's just another day;
I don't care anyway,
If I drown in your care;
Because I'm not aware.

Where is the dawn?
I've felt the warmth,
          yet have seen no light.

Where have I gone?
Deep into darkness,
          and I've become the night.

Am I still heartbroken?
Searching for loves,
          like the ones I've known.

I'm waiting to be awoken.
Until the day,
          I'll dream alone.

The budding trees, the falling leaves:
Dying and reviving
seasons of my soul.
Tears turn ice;
year goes cold.
Cathartic vice
melts away;
my heart bleeds again,
blood falling like rain.

Beautiful red sky—
what a lovely day to die.

Cleansing blue waters—
born again on a moonlit alter.

Lets turn out the lights
And dream together
All the night

Lets dream of each other
Dressed in black and white
Blissful sight, my lover.

Run to me so we can run away
Together, to wherever
Until the break of day.

Vien ici, ma belle,
Vein et me rejoindre
Alors qu'on peut reve ensemble
Sous la ceil de la nuit brillant.

Nous peuvons aller n'import ou,
Et quand le matin se reville
Nous serons encore ici
Dans la mer profond de la vie.

English Translation (sounds a lot better in french though)

Come here, my beautiful,
Come and join me
So we may dream together
Under the sparkling night sky.

We can go anywhere at all,
And when we wake
We'll still be here
In the deep sea of life.

I'm glad we met
Although not for as long as I'd hoped

All the good you've shown me
Priceless, and still you expect nothing in return
The mere effort of repayment is enough to you
Humble, as well, and never mal-intentioned

You are not perfect
Though you try to be
Giving when you can
And wishing you could more frequently

Never doubt
You are a kind heart
Don't ever forget.

The poet woke every day
With rekindled hope of revival
Desperate for a word to say
Sweet words that are vital

The white washed ruins or shattered possession
Tell the story of material obsession
The war fought over useless gold
Making young grow old

I go out into the wastes of yesteryear
In search of food and water
Cold winter wind whips past my ear
The snow will fall
And with it my world.

I will write again soon,
But for now I must rest.

I lost nights of sleep,
  Days, and weeks
    To these words I weep;
They've coiled around my soul,
  Wrapped me up tight,
    And swallowed me whole;
My blood runs black with ink of the art,
  Beneath the skin pale as paper,
    Words beat through and through my heart!
I am the poem come alive,
  I write and write
    Just to survive.

I never really lost my innocence —
There’s more to the story
than you’d like to admit.

Every day stretches my mind —
More, and more, and more,
and I fall further behind.

There is nothing perfect anymore —
I’ve shattered all my crystal roses,
all my dreams are dead, and what for?

I never really lost my innocence —
Maybe just a little bit.

The temptation within your eyes
The calming silence when the world stands still
Frozen in the perfection around you
White snow fallen, on Violet Hill

When you are finally taken from the cares of the world
And sorrow of the mundane resumes it's course
I will live in your shadow forevermore
Living in days of longing remorse

Because of you I'll never let it die
My passion for what lies within your eyes:
My everlasting paradise

I am left the lone soldier on the battlefield,
The others have fled.

Heroes into the arms of God
Cowards to the hills.

I am alone in the light of day;
No masters to serve, nor subordinates slave.

I can see for miles,
Yet this ground is unknown to me.

I walk the line between history,
And numbered days.

Shall I be a fabled burst of flame,
Or be forgotten as smolders of ash?

I began as a sprouting blade of grass like Whitman said.
And among the millions of green leaves, I am.

Ground, oh found me dead, rooted where I stay,
I once dreamt to uproot and walk away.
Was I foolish in those days, and in my thoughts;
To dream of Life while Death lovingly held my hand?

Life's short part and Death's long verse,
And I, as they act their roles upon the stage my soul,
Weep for their sense to be sung.

Coiled around the core
     of my heart
Is a sigh for the *****
     who sold my art.

I was that fiend, lusting for care,
     not long ago,
I wrote the shame on the page I tear,
     I am my foe.

But dead now, is that ***** *****,
     Buried deep within;
I write for me forevermore,
     Yet carry still that sin.

The pain of the world is far too much to bear
And for that we escape to the winter world
Where the path leads to wonder-fields, ice valleys and I stare
The beauty before us, purity of the world frozen cold

A sight that silences angels vocality
Gaia plays her infinite symphony
Over every windswept meadow
Casting light over every shadow

Give me an angels hand to hold
Once and for all as I leave this world

This is my love
Written on this page
This is where it lies forever
Lastly and elsewhere never

This is where it stops
With the ink on the page
Unable to leap into life
A permanent stain

This is eternal
True love always is
Here is my story
Forever told

My love for this
For what I write here
Bitter sometimes
But sweet just enough

Divulge what I am
With diligence
With emotion
With perpetual motion

Quickly, the words
flow out of me
Faster they come
The stronger they are.

Smashing into the page
With weight of my soul
Shattering the walls
Of reality itself.

I break into a world
Of my own creation
Through the trapdoor
Escaping into myself

A child in a field
of wheat waving in wind
Endless blue, blue sky
Vivid, simple, pure.

Great Imagination
Of the unblinded
With it all being
Infinitely possible.

That dream of mine
I share with you
Purely from my heart
That beats now in you.

I've been away,
Do you miss me today?
And yesterday?
What about yesterday; when we were something so beautiful?
So beautiful, we didn't even know.
And yesterday, what about it?
Did you enjoy it?
Do you remember my smile, like I remember your's today?
I remember, and I remember it all too fondly— it was the moment I never knew, and became instantly real with you.
Was yesterday your's as it was mine?
It must not have been as fine.
Because I led and you lost the path,
When I led, did I lead too fast?
I followed my path back to the past,
Searching for your love from yesterday,
On the abandoned road to my dismay.

I led with the light of my love;
Did you see it from across the bay?
Was it clouded by the nightly fog?
I tried so desperately to lead your way.
And now, as the darkest night dies,
I wade in the waters of yesterday,
Longing at my sinking heart with sighs.
My lighthouse still shines on your shores with love, now and then,
From my island, I gaze into the new night,
Longing for a ship to sail across the moonlit sea,
Through the fog after a long journey.

"Did you come to see me?" I'd say with hopeless hope.

Sometimes you just have to let it die
Sometimes you just have to let the it burn and watch as it all goes to hell
And at some point you'll eventually just stop giving a ****.