Forgive me sir Edgar Allen
Poe I must write this out because it's maddening
Me to no foreseeable end
I stand here, right noe, at ravens end.

I walked outside the chamber onto the Astral plane
And saw the thoughts, scribbles and pops that amounted in crowds insane
What was in my sight by no means plain
And I stood there, contemplating at ravens end.

An ebony bird flew onto my shoulder looking out at the subconscious murmurings gathered by the pink and gooey Boulder
He crowed loudly, silencing the ideas so I could speak
I shouted to them "FELLOW CITIZENS WE MUST OVER TAKE THE PEAK!"
"WE MUST SEARCH OUT AND RECLAIM WHAT MADE US UNIQUE!"
And the raven crowed again, it seemed as if it wished to speak.

Rousing the ideas were, and creativity flowed back into my head
Reactivating circutry that was once long dead
And outside the lab where I was laid to rest
A raven flew back home to his nest
He crowed loudly, so loud that one could hear what he had to say at the neighborhood store

And so I quote the raven... nevermore

She bit her lip as I stared at her body
I'm a moral man, or at least I try but tonight I felt more corrupt than John Gotti,
I jumped on her, desire written on her lovely face,
And I kissed and caressed her body
Her grunts and low groans sounding even better than a hole with an ace

She was quite the tease all through the night,
She wanted to be in charge on this encounter
She pushed me up against the minibar
And rode me right there, rough and wet on the counter

Then I got up, if for a brief moment, and laid her doggy against the still running sink
We had *** so many times that night
The next morning I could barely think

And that's my story everyone,
The best layover, well lay under really that I've ever had

I grasped the sword
charged ahead at full speed
I don't know who will win
my opponent or me
we both trained for years
shared classes, friends even food
now our elders decided that our fates
shall lie within an age old contest,
out in the forest, we staged a duel.
I heard kunai hit the trunk behind me,
I instinctively turned around
dodged, parried, struck back as he aimed
to cut me to the ground
I struck back with two quick slices
aimed directly at the head,
we fought like dogs starved for days
like the moon struggling against the sunrise
I was grievously injured, but he couldn't win the fight.
I removed his head from his body
in one swift, fluid stroke


and then I awoke...
fighting my own brother
a nightmare that had been plaguing me for days, weeks on end.
why is it I keep on thinking, that maybe just maybe, it has roots in my past loves end?

Vanilla Bean
Vanilla Bean
and yes they do know what I mean
it seems we've got to things in common
we're both funny which isn't uncommon
but to me you're hot like boiled ramen
To me your wise just like king Solomon
**** you distance why'd you **** me over
again
and then to add insult to injury
she's one of the few people to accept everything about me
ugh **** it this'll tear me apart
because now she's tucked neatly beside my heart

Ding Ding
let me in
so I can cause doubt
in every place within
As much as you claim
to be a man that doesn't know me
we're familiar with quite the history
I mean who doesn't know me

****** fear, can't you just leave me alone
I can't stand to try to live another day on my own
I can't let my heart and mind roam
anymore, I'm scared to develop feelings again but
I'm gonna put myself thru the door

NO YOU WON'T! YOU'LL SIT AROUND WATCHING DUBIOUS MOVIES ON WEBSITES WONDERING WHY YOU CAN'T GET ANYBODY TO STAY IN YOUR LIFE!

SHUT UP FEAR IM SICK OF YOU TRYING TO CONTROL MY LIFE
GO **** A FAT ONE OFF, MAYBE ACTUALLY PLEASE DEATH YOUR WIFE!

I find myself at the watering hole
aiming to drown my sorrow
I drank until I knew I was
going to feel it tomorrow

Out of reflex I looked down the bar
and what did my eyes take in
A long cool woman in a dark red dress
A siren, in stunning scarlet.

I drank in her features and summoned some courage, I had the bar ask what she was nursing
"****** Mary" I the waiter said as he passed me by he said she was also violently cursing

I bought her a drink and Sat back down
Watching the Blackhawks game
When shockingly enough she crept up behind me and asked me for my name

"Nero, I don't wish to be rude but I just had my heart snapped in two"
"Funny, the same thing happened to me, so whatever shall we do?"

I downed the last bit of whiskey then said
"I know this may sound risky but how about instead of going to our shared beds we go to a hotel instead?"

"Right to the point, I see," she said as she nursed that ****** Mary.
"How about this, I'll do you one better,
Right in the alley, it's warm and you won't need a sweater, it'll be hot enough with me"

laughing softly I said with quickness
"We both seem to suffer from ****** sickness, the alley then shall be our destination
to practice passion without hesitation.

so she walked outside, swaying her hips
I sat and watched, licking my lips, I paid the barkeep, her tab and mine
then proceeded to walk outside,

I arrived at the alley across the street
and what sight should my eyes first meet
this same siren, hitched up her dress,
her slender body she gently caressed

I began to kiss her with some of my passion
thinking "How in the Heck did this happen?"
She must have read my mind because she said
"empty those thoughts out of your head
My name is M, if that's all right
you know it well by the end of the night

I'm a cherub but i'm far
From innocent
But even my somewhat prepared self
Was far from ready for this.

We met and she made her intentions clear.
Over some drinks at a bar
"I just got out of a relationship and I need
Someone to take my mind off it, think you're up for the job?"

I was shocked at her brutal honesty
So I nodded in agreement
Hoping that maybe, just maybe
I don't wander too far off the deep end
With her this evening...

So i read a book
Can you guess the name?
V for Vendetta
This title's to blame
For this anarchic writing
In my head, not the wall
I'd just like to know,
How far, as humans we can fall
Not much from reality
I was stolen by fate
Writing of mortality
Making my head ache
Taking drugs as aspirins
Figuring out what living means
Stolen by Fate and triggered by time
It's ****** up like a pink truck and slithering into my sick mind
A painted red soul ran afoul of God forbid individuality
Only to have your mind crushed by reality
No im not going in
I refuse to think of timing and pain
Left home as a better writer to leave the game
Putting guns to my head
Thinking im mislead
Being a fool and too selfish
To realise im sane
Remember remember
The fifth of November
The day the voices began to plot
I see know reason why high
Mental treason should ever be forgot
So now walk with me
Ill make you all see
That circles are redder than triangles
As the sea of memories tangles

Like a lot of people, I love music
Common sense, Lauryn Hill, Musiq Soul child, I need both conscious lyrics and something ignorant and hype to balance it out.
And I've come to the realization
that I've met neo-souls music's living personification

Supple and smooth and conscious at the same time
Melodic and nice to listen to, and she's definitely more than worth the investment of time
With a mind quicker than a .38 at a right wingers waist

Why I never bothered to try to speak to her in high school is a question so hard to answer my brain is gonna end up in space.

I'm in an inquisitive mood so I want to ask you does it matter that my skin tone is somewhat darker than you?
Does it matter that I'm neither Skinnier or fatter that I don't have kool aid and malt liquor taking up space in my bladder?
that I'm reading Akira, a manga, a very good one at that, does it seem odd to you, that I do these things, yet I'm black?

Does it make me less of a black man, no scratch that does it make me less of a human
that I'm proud of my roots but hate what people can do? That I honestly see in the world behind my eyes
that a guy with a beard and turban can fly these friendly skies unchallenged or is that just a hallucination brought on by too much purple drank and watermelon
Does it matter that I don't intend on being a felon or having a record
that I sometimes think the world's on a chessboard while I'm stuck with checkers

Is it too much to ask
that one day harmony happens with an ear splitting blast
that my skin tone or ring tone won't matter in the greater scheme of things...
that maybe the fact that my name isn't to blame for what others do in slew of what's really happening.. what do you think?

Satsui No hado cleanly translated
Means "A surge of murderous intent"
I intend to channel that forbidden desire
To sear off my personal demons rotting flesh

I'm sick of living with life killing doubt
Tired of days where my body is up but I'm mentally down
Done with my once constant smile is replaced with a constant frown.

BEGONE! GET OUT OF MY LIFE!
YOUR BAGGAGE IS AT THE DOOR
LET THE DOOR HIT YOU ON THE WAY OUT!

if I told you that you have the looks of a Da Vinci painting
that your skin was soft as the canvas on which he was Raining his ideas
what would you do?

If I told you that your curvaceous body was vivid in its design
that being around me as you are, and not playing a role to try to please was just fine
if I wanted to tell the whole **** world you were mine... what would you do?

If I said that your hair sat like a little trophy
that every time I kiss your cheeks I love when they get all rosy
that your lips are soft and warming
like coffee early in the morning
what would you do?

if I said... that I'm falling hard for you
that I haven't like this in forever because it's true
that I've been hurt before
and I swear my heart just keeps on yearning for more...

what would you do?

If i asked you to do me a favor
and let me hold you gently, because
you're simply an amazing beauty,
could you tear down the walls you built around
your fragile spirit, and let me?

If i wanted to be your personal stuffed animal
and listen to you spill all your secrets
and dry your tears up whenever tears fall
out of those lovely grey eyes,
could you open yourself up to me?
Honestly?

I'm trapped in a straitjacket
The Asylum's cleaning up off of this racket
I'm losing it, I keep writing on the wall
And then when I come back from the cafeteria I know for **** sure that they're gone
I've been in here so long the padded cell is deflating
It's degrading to have to suffer from the orderlies berating

They say the mind bends and twists like light caught in a prism I'm struggling to find the light trapped within what's written
I'm writing all day abusing pages constantly but I put on the facade of walking confidently

Hey I wrote this one, what'd ya think?

I was on the plane
I had my music on
Just people watching on the flight
I kept to myself,
Then she caught my eye.
She was on the flight, but escaped my sight apparently

I looked up and flashed a smile and I got one in return
The plane landed, and we got up to leave
But we received an unexpected announcement
There was a problem with the plane, so we'd have to stay here until the engine was pronounced fixed.

So I gathered my things and got out into the gate
There she was again, my eyes hypnotized as she walked by, my heart began to quake,
She was perfectly curvy, supple and understatedly ****.
It was crazy how she grabbed my lustful mind,

It should be no surprise
That I felt inspired when I managed to find
Zeal's theme from Chrono Trigger,  Corridors of time
And as I began to ponder this rhyme
I thought "this piece of music is an excellent description of our lives"
Because truthfully, life is a corridor from birth to the grave
The end is inevitable, whether you were born again or unsaved
So I stare at the walls occasionally and at the past I look back
I smile at the memories given to me from days long past
And I March forward once again, and we should all do the same
Life for all is a corridor, the only difference between them is our name

There's a sign there
A stick person in a wheel chair
And i know its intent
And whoever made it
Is currently paying their rent
But
A sign can only say so much.

A sign wont capture the staring
The misguided attentions from people in a state of caring
The glaring into the sun
Kids wondering "what have they become?"

Human curiosity is a wonderful thing
But that doesn't lessen the impact
Of ignorance's sting.

Because it would take two dictionaries to tell my story

If I didn't put this pen to this  page I'd probably be gone now or twisted over with rage I engage in my self deprecation as my own form of dedication to life and my craft it's like Richard Roundtree when he was shaft I grab this pen to save lives maybe end a few careers I guess it beats draining my sorrow into beer not to judge those that drink but when I think of someone holding alcohol my mind goes to when I was younger and saw those broken dreams and shattered men on the street corner battling a habit that'll never truly die that's a lot to take in with young innocent eyes my pride may be strong but my heart is weaker than a cheap speaker it's crazy because I've known love very well it's slippery as hell like an electric eel I'm an eccentric I feel like I tried to fit in my race but that shouldn't be in my brain

*drops Mic

Every feel like you're stuck but it doesn't seem like you're in a rut
like you're comfortable but your head constantly zones out
it's weird trying to describe what occurs in my mind

I can be absentminded but I tend to find it's where my favorite writings come from, when my head is in that liquid void so stock up on daydreams like a loaded gun

She said she'd give me pleasure
she said her charms were life's greatest treasure
I got a different feeling
almost indescribable
a high like a kite, but energetic and kinetic
it was strange to experience both to remember and forget
what she brought to the table and did to my head
It wasn't psychedelic, but it wasn't reality based
I know I'm starting to sound like a head case
But Molly gave me a new lease
After I learned to fight a disease

Okay look I'm sick of the games
I'm sick of getting attached only for you to keep dropping other names
I'm sick of all that so just let me know
do you even want me? or like me?
I can move if that's not so
I mean don't get me wrong I do care about you
I think you're beautiful but don't let that make it seem I can't live without you
I mean I'll admit I've made mistakes
but **** it my dignity and my pride isn't something I'll let you take advantage of because that's already been done to me before
you think I'm not new to this thing when I know all too well the score

So like I said if you really want me around then **** it just let me know
I'm only a text or a call away so don't be afraid to hurt me, I'll just grow
I mean, you never text me anyway even when I text you first
in fact, all this is is getting my frustrations with you down in verse.
anyway I'm sick of games and love being an unsolvable puzzle
just lay it out how you feel about me
we'll save both time and blood on my knuckles

We are wolves
We hunt as one.
We howl as one, at the moon so bright.
We die as one, cold and ****** on the frozen forest floor.

There is no confusion amongst our ranks,
We all must hunt to survive, **** or be killed or be shot by the humans, as the vultures eat us as our bodies stank.

There is no fear, only purpose
There is hunger but there is also satisfaction
There is no pain that can't be overcome
There is no battle that cannot be won.

There is no affection, only cold calculation.
There is no heart, only pure grit and determination.
There is no cowardice, only destruction

Blood.
Dripping crimson essence of life
Warm and wholly essential for my feeding tonight.
My body is ready for the darkest harvest
of the... heh heh... innocent sacrificial lambs placed before me....

The flesh unsuppled... and the blood so pure

MORE! I NEED MORE! I'M AS INSATIABLE AS A DOG IN FRONT OF A STEAK!

Blood on the walls...

There's that feeling again
that primal urge,
      that wanton desire
                        I don't know where it comes
from, but it's back and burning, like a never
       extinguished fire.
               That desire for hot skin pressed up   against mine, wanting to hear all of those sensual noises as we pleasure each other, every soft groan and every muttered curse,
                   to desire this and not have access, that's the ******* worst.

Miss independent
So beautiful, so fly
You say you don't need anybody?
We all know that's a lie

We respect what you bring
To the table,
You took the initiative to support and provide for yourself, because you can will and are able

But girl, don't assume that a man with limited finances isn't worth your time
He may not have a jet, three cars, but he's willing to invest his time

He may not be Bill gates, making billions everyday
But If he goes out if his way to make you happy
You'd be dumb not to let him stay

So miss independent
Before you say that men are worthless, shiftless and not worth the time
Stop listening to your bitter single friends, and try to change your state of mind

I have my own thoughts and feelings,
I'm human, remember?

I have desires and needs too
I'm human, remember?

I have dislikes and likes as well
I'm human, remember?

I have emotions with considering too
I'm human, remember?

I have a beating heart and a sound mind
I make mistakes and sometimes I'm unkind
I have strengths and weaknesses
I've cried, laughed, and been struck speechless

I'm human, remember?

When we're tired we sleep
And when we sleep we dream
And lately i keep seeing this dog
Can someone tell me what it means?
He's a little Akita hound
Pointed ears and scrunchy nose
I named him Tanuki
Because he looks like an undersized fox
With no weasels to hold
He's little, tiny and loyal
But only exsists in my head
He loves snuggling by me, apparently
He's loves nodding his head

So why do i keep seeing this adorable dog
As i hover over the cliff of sleep?
So can someone please tell me,
What do my dreams mean?

Yes.
I'm the proud Owner of a lonely heart
It's not for sale I'm afraid
Because I mistakenly tore it apart.
Over thinking and over planning
Cracked it like an egg.

Yes.
I'm the owner of a sad mind
Worn and tried from life's ceaseless grind
I don't know where to go
And if I leave what I'll find.

Yes.
I'm uninspired my mind has dried up
My tears have cried up
I want to snap this streak
Of anything I write not meeting ny harsh critique

But I guess it's better than being the owner of a broken heart...

I sat at the bar
You sat at the other end
You just had a fight with your boyfriend
that the whole bar saw begin

He left in a rage
you returned to your drink in a huff
I nursed my drink to build up courage
because I desperately wanted to ****!

Finally I walked over to you
and said "I hope your alright"
she looked dead at me and said
"I need something new tonight"
"What do you mean? I can buy you a drink"
"No I need you tonight not a drink".

I finished off my malt brown whiskey
as she downed her dry martini
I called in a cab
he showed up, and in the back we talked... shall we say freaky

I barely knew your name
in fact I know next to nothing about you at all
but when I laid my eyes on you
my cxck was at your beck and call
We walked into my apartment and I kissed your soft neck
beer goggles weren't on, but she still looked a positive ten

We made our way into my bedroom
our restraint left at the door
you laid me down on my bed
and made me your personal wxore

I caressed her soft warm *******
as she bounced upon my cxck
I laid my tongue upon her lips
as her puxxy my cxck was at rest

As she moaned out her pleasure I said "come to the kitchen"
I barely knew her but so wasn't love,
it was lust with which I was smitten

I bent her over ny kitchen counter
all my things she slid,
I pulled her hair back and spanked her hard
she said "**** me like I'm your little bitxh"

We fxcked ******* the floor, in the room, in the kitchen, on the elevator in the stairwell,
We had more *** than a concubine on hormones, a week had passed before we finally got our clothes on,
"hey I still don't know who you are, what's your name?"
"You'll know, call me next time you have a *******."

Since I see a lot of posts about us
I'm gonna spell it out for those that doubt us
So a lot of people think that material things
Are equivalent to the joy that a person can bring

Oh so I'm supposed to have a car a house and two jobs,
But all you can offer me is nothing but a bad attitude and sporadically slobbing my
****.

So I'm supposed to have an entire kingdom at my disposal
But all you bring to the table is nothing but a wallet that's an empty oval

My point is people, is don't flatter yourself
If you can't meet your own standards, you better put finding love on the shelf

Sometimes I sit back
on my bed with an RHCP track
playing blocking out the world
then the voices kick in
"Why aren't you looking for someone?"
"Do you want to be alone forever or do you think that's a wise endeavor?"
I respond back that my confidence is gone out behind the shack stabbed in the back with a macabre machete the size of a horses ***.
that every time I get comfortable with someone now I flinch, waiting for my heart to get stomped out or chipped away
that's why I said for the time being alone I'll stay.

My head and my heart seem out of sync I think it's clear that I'm trying to focus on myself and trying to accumulate both mental and financial wealth and improving my physical health but my heart sees none of this it just wants to be cuddled and mollified and it's mortifying to me to fight this internal war constantly because I want to be free from my feelings and my past because every time I say they're gone they keep roaring back

Let's take a trip back in time to when I was still young
naive bit smart, hyper and dumb
I was about 4 years old and on christmas that year I got a bike
when simmer rolled around it was time to learn to ride
So my cousins and I went to the park across the street
we started off slow, I learned to balance on my feet
I started rolling with support, two hands then 1
I was cocky like a spring loaded gun

So my cousin suggested that I do one run by myself
I thought "I can do this now I don't need any help!"
So my cousin pushed me and I started to ride
I lost my balance and into the air I did fly
I landed in the grass but I knocked my two front teeth loose
I was crying like an innocent man headed for the hangmans noose

Several weeks later, after I calmed down
after I got my bandaids for my scabs from that mean old ground
my cousin who at the time was pursuing a career in dentistry
decided I would become his first vict- I mean patient, yes young innocent me.

So he pulled my teeth out, by hand I might add
I did stop playing with them, of that most were glad
but here's something I'll probably tease them about until I'm in my grave
those teeth he pulled out? didn't come back in until the first grade.

He's isolated on a distant world
Far away from what we know
He's gone and left his favorite girl
He's marooned just to show

How life can curve and twist away
To bend and shaped and shift
Though some would have life the same always
To avoid an emotional rift

Between me and you what we both hold
Dear to us and hpw we are the same
Though shooting stars may break the mold
Our hearts aren't to blame

For hurting when we hurt, crying when we cry
Breaking when we break and lifting us up high
For changing when we change for holding us in check
And for when we are nervous jumping up to our necks

Anyway,  we were here overnight so I checked into the airport hotel
I walked upstairs and cherry perfume I did smell
It was the same woman from the flight!
I tried not to stare with all my might!
It took all my willpower to walk into my room and get set to sleep for the night.

I had gotten in the shower and hear my door click
I turned the shower down, so I could hear outside
The sounds that hit my ears drove my ***** insane

She was in the room! I must've not closed the door all the way
And from the sounds of it she intended to stay.
So I got out of the shower, towel wrapped around my waist
I looked and saw her clothes strewn all over the place

"I saw you staring at me, what you thought I wouldn't notice?
"I love the attention, as I'm now sure you know this.
"I came here to have an affair, and you seem just my type. "
As if she couldn't be sexier, this drove me over the edge
She was someone else's lover? And she was laying here in my hotel room bed. ..

I learned to crawl on basslines,
And learned to walk on the back beat,
I learned to read when i heard 4 or 5 bars
Delievered through the microphone.
And i learned how to dance when a DJ started scratching the records.
In other words, music is in my DNA
I'm a proud soul child and I'll gladly throw that flag on display.

There's so much about music that's strange and unique but,
There's always one thing thats constant.. the beat.
The heart of music that you can feel from the darkest ghettos and projects. All the way to the urban sprawl that is our cities.
The beat.

Allow me to rant like a vulture with no carrion, I'm carrying a burden that's stiffer than Shinsuke Nakamura revolving around something simple, my job.

Now let me start of by saying I like my job, it's simple and pays a decent wage
But I'm incensed at myself, it's a never ceasing rage

Because it's natural to want out of the nest, but dear old mom's job market is phasing out
And I'm caught between her and my own nagging self doubt

Because I want to move away, have my own Corner of the earth
But every time I want to get serious about this ambition I think of her being physically or financially hurt

So I'm stuck in a position that makes no sense

Maybe, just maybe that's why I'm incensed

Sometimes you need to lay back let the stress fade away
it's Christmas time anyway no need to make the skies seem grey
Instead be thankful for what you got
and say one good prayer for those that have not

So now I'm gonna just kick back and relax
put some Sade, Kendrick Lamar, Maybe even The Beatles on blast
inhale on the good and exhale all that bad
I've lived to see another day, that's enough reason to be glad

Head games from a dead brain
It's sole goal, it seems, is to drive itself insane
My memory gets fuzzy
And when I get nervous or forget something my nerves get all buzzy

Head games that I'm losing against myself
You'd think I'd ***** myself to science to achieve wealth
But if a frontal lobe can't be relied on, then can a medical professional?
It ***** because though I try to work around my own problems, my brain puts the bullet in my legs

Don't wake me
please
I want my own world
not your reality
Call me an escapist
Call me a coward
but quite frankly I'm sick of earth
like atlas when he held the burden of the sky
I can't stop myself from wondering why
the world is so cold
to the young and to the old
the young have to grow up so much faster
to survive and even then they won't have a chance to really thrive
And the old are out in the bitter cold be it from past injustices karma or just having nowhere to go

So when the lights have gone off
and the world has shut down
I hope a crying falcon can whisper my words
my dreams, on its crying breath
that I lived with honor and left my heart inside my work
And let my words and thoughts find a home with someone alone that reads and my ink stains give them what they need

You'll have to forgive my lack of rhyme, honestly there hasn't been much on my mind but by digging into my past i'm positive ill find something worth putting into rhyme
So i'm gonna guess and say that, dear reader, you're new to poetry and you may wonder what writing these strange thoughts down will do for me, you see poets tend to reopen old wounds, you may think its crazy but its as normal to us as lunch at noon
So intentionally scabbing ourselves is par for the course,
so why, oh why is the pain we feel still like a brillo pad, very coarse?
well basically although  to you were insane, but to us expressing our feelings and pain, is our claim to fame

I don't know where or why I fell down again it's like sadness is an inescapable stalking fan but that's when I pickup this old reliable pen it's old and tested but its always gotten the job done so now I need to confront these feelings with an ink loaded gun.

breathe

Let me start by saying I love my family and I know that they do mean well but sometimes they unintentionally put me through hell first off I don't mind helping with basic maintenance my grandpa is getting up in age so like dollars it makes sense
But why is it I'm always the number one draft pick for every single job?
The very least you can do is offer to help him out my god!

Secondly, to my aunt who I show the utmost respect towards
I know you want the best for me but meddling in my life while letting yours fall down the tubes can win you some Darwin awards.

I hated that I had to write this but I needed to get this of my chest,
So maybe me putting this into verse was for the best

sorry I haven't written lately I haven't been my best
quite frankly I've got a lot on my chest
so allow me to air all of this out
I hate bottling up my problems and lashing out.

My laptops broken, and it's an expensive Fix
that doesn't sound like much but a lot of my creative works, poems stories and other things are trapped on it

My mom quit her job so now she's jobless,
she worked for attorneys she liked once but her co-workers gossiped and prodded into her life more than snitch in a mafia outfit

My sister and I haven't been speaking lately all because I made a simple mistake involving a baked pastry, I said I was sorry but she won't accept it
so until she's out of her petty thinking mindset all communications I'm rejecting

along with all this I haven't had much inspiration to run with I've been dry for awhile using throwaway concepts that really don't fit my style so I took a collaboration kick and then a break for awhile

**** love
**** hate
**** this entire world and all those that give me hate

*******
**** me
**** everything it seems

**** lust
**** feelings
because all they do is leave me seeking what I can never find

I've found my personal paradise
Where the water is so clear it hurts my eyes
And Good and bad can go totally undisguised
I can see the sunshine raining into my underwater home
And the rain breaching the waves
It's so oddly peaceful watching the droplets collapse and cry into the sea

Aquas, dear aquas, I'm so glad you were revealed to me.
The lack of oxygen could suffocate an ordinary mortal
But you gave me the strength to persevere
To live in n the water I hold so dear

I **** her collarbone leaving little bites
Our bodies, against each other still fights
She leaves her nails' marks on my back
Like a big ****** heart attack
She places her hand on my chest
But I'm not letting her rest
She whispers "Stop making me *** you naughty boy"
And under the bed takes a *** toy
Red handcuff, I lock her on the bed
She looks at me "please, Mr, **** me bad"

I looked her dead in the eye and slide myself inside
I went faster than normal as she squealed in delight
I grabbed on her waist while thrusting in deep

She slows me down and looks at the clock,
Still moaning she says "Please, stop"
I ask her if she's okay
And with a sweet voice she has nothing to say
Its 8 in the morning, I need to go home son
I put my clothes on leaving, she says biting her lip "come tomorrow in the afternoon"

oh hey.. I'm sorry.
did I forget myself again?
**** my brain, letting me down again
All the synapses and nerve endings
bending at the slightest form of stress
I guess what my own mind can do to me
is unfortunately crazy to even myself
it's uncompromising, uncontrollable,
it's a constant demon on my back
I don't hear the voices up there
but I swear my brain can be
my own worst enemy

my heart isn't too helpful either
getting attracted and attached to people who wouldn't think twice about spraying me in the eye with either
it's seems like my mind don't have logic
or better yet it's a disorder that's neurologic

Somedays you can't get rid of a bomb
Somedays you wanna know what's going on
Innocent blood spilled in the sand
of a far off eaten land

Somedays you win
Somedays you lose
Somedays you think am I really going to make the news?
found dead in the street, robbed or beat
is that what is my due?

Somedays you wonder
can life be once again simple
because now it's as difficult is picking off a pimple
or can I find the answer, in my girl's sweet dimples
because when she smiles it takes my breath away...
and I no longer worry about some days

Anybody else hate assumptions
like you really come off as presumptuous
Its really very scrumptious the tea that I drink
when someone who knows nothing about something tries to speak what they think

Now, if you have an opinion on a topic, that's perfectly fine
If we disagree respectfully that's great, but that's not Who I'm discussing this time
I'm discussing people who don't know anything then flex like they have a functioning mind

you know the type Right? those people who have larger than life mouths?
but when it comes to stating facts they look like they've voided their bowels
it's like you could jump on Google and search it out, connect the consonants and vowels,
and look up the facts and form an opinion, instead of running off at the mouth.

Like I said, I'm okay if your opinion or situation differs from mine,
but I'm speaking on those that jump into a debate completely blind
next time, jump on the net and do a good old fashioned fact find.
then say something once you form an opinion on your "mind"

Don't you hate it when your train of thought is moving consistently and then something derails it?
Another idea or just a random thought pops into your head and displaces
Your concentration, this happens all too often now
With technology improving attention span goes down

and the more it goes down
the less kids play outside
and the less homework gets done

So as the sun sets all I can say is
Distractions are constant but attention you can afford to pay

you just gotta learn what you're paying to
and if the cause is really worth it because
the time you got on this here planet
is all you've got