i wake up
empty in my heart
the tears roll down
i am lost inside my sadness
the thoughts enter my mind
over taking my soul.with negative
i want break free and just scream
no one hears me
i get up wear my mask
but under the mask is the hurt that.lives deep inside
not everything is ment to be pretty
i just need u be light during my darkest days

Kenny diamond

this not a poem but  just my thoughts

I want to have a book one day but not sure if I am good enough.  I think being able  to just have  book  is something great

I had writer's block for while I want to write but not sure of words. I am going get back into reading help with my writing.

I know this not from but I feel like  this place I can vent

wish I could be reason u smile
Being the guy fix your broken heart
A warm hand hold during your darkest days
Wipe your tears
make you smile but never to cry
I am left on this battlefield
Only my heart in my hand
Hope is in air
so is my warmth
Cutting up from past
But never gave up on love
I miss the feeling as flows deep inside me
I forgot the world when I
saw you
But then woke up was left with just thought of yo

I  have so much I want to say
But not sure how to put it into  words
My feelings out on paper
But my mind  is blocked
I write  but then I take  it away
I  judge myself  while  I tear myself apart
I start over  as my thoughts pour out
Still  thinking to myself
I want to touch people with my words
The negative  cuts in deep
The voice telling me  
Not to write and  just give up
who will I be

The feeling of  writing  
Overtakes me  
Being able  to
Give yourself to   the world
let  your words  tell the story
At  times I feel  free
I open myself up
And hope you can see me for being me.

Why  is it so hard finding love
People  give  up  at  the start
Too lazy get know each  other
Put the work  in and  leave the past in the past
The mistake of others put on you
Here are my flaws
I show you who I am
I bring no faded images
You wanted perfect  
but  have flaws
here  is me  
A  man who wears  his heart  for the world  to seee

My mind is blocked
The only thing my body feels  is the sadness
The tears no longer flow
My heart scared and torn
I wish I? could  break this
The sadness is my cancer flowing in body with no care
I wnt scream but no hears me
break free  break free break free
My words  are the pain  that give  this  hope

We all  need that bad guy in our life
The one  who takes the blame
The  one who makes  us  forget that we  were ever  wrong

That person who we  rip apart  with  our  words
BC  we  cant look  with inside our selfs
We  never  see the  good in the person but always  look  at  the  bad
Puting the past mistakes in their face
As  you the  seat at the top while you live your perfect life

We all  need that  bad guy in our life
But we forget  that   where we  be  if  you saw yourself
Tearing down  your self to rebuild
breaking  down those words  
I woke up  it was clear to me
I was never the bad guy you just never saw the true me.

I am left with so much pain
The  sadness  takes  over  like cancer that can t  be stopped
I wish  i had words  and power to make  it stop
There no password  or  sun shine
Just  the pain in my heart
As  i watch my life slowly  faded  away

Can you helo me?
Do  you have the key unlock
Or is my mind so far gone

I look as i am down on kness
Grab my chest as this sadness flows  through
I miss  your warm  hands  sound of hope in air

I scream break me free
I want rip my mask apart
Let   my pain be go
The words inside my head
This never  ending  song that needs  to end

you left me
My heart never stopped
But my mind playing back
The moments we had
You were my rock
And also my love
I am lost inside without

We care when our mind says not too
I wish i could  not let my feelings  get so deep
When i see  your face
Inside my soul  sends echo to my heart
I can't  help  but love you
You were only one that matter
I wish  i could been your king
But in end  i was just  a pawn in this game of love

People  will laugh with   you then  stab you in back.  We  think they are  friends but all long they are wishing for  your downfall.  They use  your mistakes as bullets in a gun.  The sound of people talking behind  your back as  they smile to your  face.  It started  with hello but now it is time for  a goodbye.

I  love you
I miss  your  voice
Way you laughed  at my jokes
Made me forget  everything
My heart was so full
Your beauty was  another wonder of  the world
I hope  grab this  gold ring
But woke up it was all dream

Words that cut heart but never heal. The sadness that over comes my soul
Left with only hope
I come back but with same ending
It just the same movie
You never understand me
My pain runs so deep
No love but negative outlook you see
I have break myself free rip apart those chains
Can you hear me or is my words so far gone.
By kenny diamond

you will always see the negtive
But never saw the sun
Words that cut into the skin
That sink in like a cancer
Going into the past
Loading the gun with my mistakes
I wish you saw me
In end i was just another faded image

You  stuck  in your  judgmental  ways
So fast reload  the gun of  the past
Looking for ways  to cut me down
Words  cut deeper then  a bullet
Lost in  negative  but never  saw  good
I can't change who u are
But  always come  back with this hope
Looking for  sun but only seeing the darkness
Bullets of the past  hitting me in chest
I wish you knew pain in my heart
Mom you are  just walking  in your own world

Your  beauty was  more then
Your beauty was never understood
Your beauty was  not just one night stand
Your beauty didn't  tell the  whole story
Your beauty was more   then just  another face
You were more then just beauty

Sun  is  light
the  night is dark
My heart wide open
The feelings left on the floor
i go into this battle
With no walls
But just hope  of  your warmth
The  loyal  is the gold
And understnading is the blood
Love  me but never let go
Hold me  when i fall
Show me kindness  during the dark
The battle  with love is brave
And won with the hope

i  never get  why people are so fake   They run  there mouth behind your back but smile to your face. Always  looking for  the weakness.    At times  it so clear just  like stain glass window.  I should just put this mask on but  never was meant to wear.  All   long  you judged me  with  the  negative outlook thinking  you knew me.  So fast show hate  but forgot  the words  you say over take  your  heart like cancer. I never wanted be just another  sheep.  I am just   man that  is misunderstood .

You walk by and  smile
As  we pass  by
So fast  judge me  
Cut  me down with just  words
So fast  with lies
You  walk smile
As we  pass by
A sheep  trying  be wolf
Image  is  like clear  class window
I  wish i could say  sorry but that would be lie
You never  took  time to  see me
I am too complex   for you
All i can do was hit with those words  
Let  then over take your heart
But wait you never had one

You took the time
I wish i could say the words
But my heart can't  lie
So fast  judge me
But never took the time
See the other side
I never was ment to wear those chains
Or  be  another sheep
if could say sorry that would  be lie
I  am not your cup of  tea

Kenny Diamond

I not sheep
Nor does my heart have filter
You just don't understand
So lost in your own thoughts
Words trying cut my skin
A man with many different mask
Wait was this person you wanted
Or  smoke that fade before sun

Only see  you
My heart burns  for your  touch
Leave  it all behind
Remove this cold from my heart
Holding hands  the warmth  of another
Just  us  wait  min
I woke up left  here
With  my tears
You  turned away
never looked back
Still stuck in my dreams
It was gone before the rain
I wish  you knew how much
I  loved  you

I was nothing more
Just a second class
You never saw the good
But always saw the storm
before the sun
My heart playing on my thoughts
The sadness over taking me
I used have hope
But time goes by
You never understand me
So quick with words
Tore into my flesh
I  always looked for hope
But always found dark
Before the light
I have break away from those chains
Set myself free
My heart screams
So torn and broken
can you fix me?
Or  i am just another broken image in your thoughts

Love  or hate
I am just another image
You can t see
Fade deep in your thoughts
A complex mind
A heart left me caring
As my feelings play on those strings
i wish i could be the image
That see
But  i wear  a different   mask

My heart is my weakness
Care  and love  tug on my heart strings
I just  want  keep hope
I wish i could find words to say
Let inner self come out
My heart needs the warmth
I walk on this hot stones for you
Give me your hand
I can be doc  to put back  your heart
let  me  be sun   that shines  during the rain.

I held on  
I lost hope
i am on my knees
Picking up my heart
There is  no fix
I am torn
can you fix me?

I just never want  to  let go
A kiss with you
A moment never lost
I forget everything
When  i am  holding you
You are sun in my sky
be my  hand when i fall
Hold my heart
I just want  be with you
I will  never stop loving you

I  wish  i could  say  goodbye
It started  with a hello
I should never let you go
It played it out like movie
I thought  this would  been happy ending
Will my heart go on?
The words written all  over your body
I could never let go
I been so torn inside
Don t hold my past
This  should never been a goodbye but know in my heart i know why
Two hearts that were never ment  meet
I will still choose you

My heart is my weakness
The word love to you was just another word
The light vs darkness
You never saw good
But only looked at the   bad
So fast  to judge me as you put me on the cross
All i need was your love
A kind word into my world
hand bring me up when i fall
So much pain over comes my soul
I want scream inside but you wouldn't understand
I have let go of hope
And knowing you will never be rock in my life.

I wish  you knew  the thoughts in my head
i fall down but where this going?
My heart  broken torn inside
The words cut my skin
Dug  a hole  that never went a away
I was never ment to shine in your world
so fast to judge me push me away
Too quick try to  mold me into what your views where
I am just to complex for you or did  you not care to understand
A work of art but  lost in your paint of negative ,
My love was my weakness
Beating my head on this brick wall
It seems to never  end
I wish you  can voice in my head
It time to pick different road.

Years go by
I miss the touch
The feeling of her warmth
Love fills the air
Nothing else matters  but you
Your lips on mine
I leave all my pain behind  
Just let go  
Take my broke heart
Can  you fix me?

Let me open my mind
Shut door on ones who don't  understand me
I can only break those chains
Bring light rather  then darkness
My skin torn cut  fallen
But still shade my skin
So complex but my heart bleeds
I see past your own thoughts
Why did  even care
Was so stuck in negative outlook that you saw in me
So busy bring up past but forgot that we all fallen
Some more then others but we live keep moving forward
I am not blinded just see world in different  light
Time to break those chains

So kind hearted
The years that went by
You are getting older
Time  to get out the  early bird discount
Cover the sofa with plastic wrap
Watch ****** she wrote
As  u go  to bed before 8 pm
Time  to bring out the   check  book    and write a $12 check
Wait  you are not that old

Today was  your day
Look back As sun hits your face
You are one of kind
Loved  by many
I wish i could give  the  you moon
Buy you a five  star dinner
But  in end  all  you wanted  is  for  me to get  a red card
So  Let today be great BC  you are a  work of art.

I battle  myself
A war  that never seems be won
I give in to my own thoughts
I am trapped  inside  myself
I was just second class in  your life
You will never  understand me
So stuck in past as load  your gun
Not with bullets  but mistakes i made
The words cut my skin
Blood pours out on to floor
My tears mixed in
I look up for hope
see  only image you wanted to see
I wish i could be more in your life
But  i can't  be sheep if want become the wolf

Our hearts on line
Broken and hurt at times
Jumping over the zone
breaking down the brick wall
Then to find out you got put in the zone
The hurt and pain overcome
You tell self walk away
But she says lets be friends
Then  you are too busy picking up your heart off the  ground
And ask  your self
Can you get past this
You want  be best guy say yes
But deep down  your mind needs  repair
You broke down the  wall just  find a another one behind it
Months  latter she post
Breaking up and there you are
Picking  and wiping the tears away
All  you ever wanted   to be  was her star in the sky

It started  with hello
But never thought it could been goodbye
So much beauty with heart that i never seen
Time stopes  and all can think  about is her
But this wall was too much
I  just  wanted a   chance  to  swing the bat
Just wanted to  show  her i was more  then  
Another  one  hit  wonder
I  wake up and  miss  the  touch of your warmth skin
Look into your  eyes  and   saw  the world past by
My heart vs  you
you replay the mistakes  of  others
Trying go back  in time
But  the mold just never fits
i can't  be clone of your X
My flaws  never defined me
It was just another layer of my soul
I never wanted be your next mistake
I Just   wanted be the doc to put that heart back together

I wish could hear
love  and not just hurtful words
I wish  i was more then second class in your life

So  quick   to judge
But can t  see the  logic
So quick  bring up  the past
But forgot  you wore  the same shoes

I  lost hope  
But  my head hurts  from this brick wall
My heart  is not made  of stone
It could be my weakness
For  caring  when i just should  of walked away

I can't  be person you see
I am not just another sheep
My flaws cover my face
The past that can;t be un done
Feeling alone inside
As my thoughts tear me apart
The words that stuck my skin
I am broken without no glue
But who would knew
This  was just another mask that need be broken

You are sun in my sky
The star that shines above
I just want hold your hand
Look deep in your eyes
And never let go
Being the reason you smile
Your beauty sends echo
My heart is wake
Take my hand until there nothing left
Your smile turns  darkness into light
I want break those chains
Take my heart just don't  let go