"giddily" poems
So I heard once that there’s always
some gnarly looking carrot
in every bag of carrots
and you’re supposed make a wish on it
if you get it.
But I didn’t have a bag of veggies
I had a jar of Gumby and Poki
shaped gummies.
Finally the day came when there
were only two Gumbys left.
One was bent in half and
smashed together
and the other looked as all the rest had.
I pulled out the sad little gummy and
made a wish
like it was some ugly carrot.
I wished my crush would kiss me,
And giddily I walked to a coffee house
because I was hoping he would be there
even though I sternly told myself that
he had no reason to be there.
I found the coffee house closed and knew
my wish wasn’t happening that night.
I talked with a friend about my woes
and she confessed her heartache.
We smiled and laughed and died
just a little on the inside.
We had hoped that in college we wouldn’t
feel like middle school girls
with unrequited crushes.
The next day he dropped off a fish
(and this is no euphemism
or pretty poetry slang,
I opted to fish-sit while
he went home for break).
After he left, and
feeling more than silly
I took out the last Gumby
and pretended.
I pretended that it was every wish
on a boy I had made
since I realized boys weren’t
completely disgusting.
On my way to class
I held the little gummy in my
frozen, clenched fist
and wished
that’d he’d kiss me before he left.
I made it really specific
because every movie I’d ever seen
with genies in it had taught me that
specifics were key to avoiding
mishap and mayhem.
Obviously, it didn’t come true.
And I feel like I’m back in middle school,
wishing on ugly carrots and stars
that look suspiciously like airplanes.
Everyone has crushes,
and still more wishes.
Why I thought
at the age of nineteen
when the glamour of Disney-endings
and romantic-comedy plots
had tarnished to realism,
that a Gumby gummy prayer
would come true,
well I’m not entirely sure.
Maybe it’s no matter how old you are
there are always ugly carrots
and shooting stars
and fast airplanes
and romantic comedies
and gummies in the shape of
kids’ show characters.
Maybe no matter how disappointed I am
there will always be unrequited crushes
and genies for wishes
and God for prayers
and heaven forbid
hope.
Feb 1, 2013
Feb 1, 2013 at 11:53 PM UTC
All wise and knowing seer of Delphi, Oracle I beg thee tell me,
What enchanting malady afflicts my mortal soul?
It churns my stomach like as butter, pangs my heart and makes it flutter,
Spins my thoughts so rapidly, I lose all self-control;
A wildly spinning vortex and I lose all self-control.
Striking deeply, sharp blades whirring, thrusting madly, twisting, turning,
Searing pain that scorches, burning, brings me to despair;
Silently it tracks and trails me, pouncing when my courage fails me,
Oracle, what sickness ails me? Save me from its snare;
Oh wise and noble Oracle, what has me in its snare?
Mortal fool, be still and listen, I espied you in a vision,
Ancient magic has arisen from the depths of hell;
Crafted in the Devil's furnace, cunningly it seeks to burn its
Way into your soul, I've seen this, none can break its spell;
It knows your every weakness and you cannot break its spell.
You must succumb and do it swift, or e'er your soul will be adrift,
Held captive in the Devil's rift, your mind will split asunder;
Your struggle will be fought in vain, eternal doom in endless pain,
Relent or e'er you'll feel its bane, your soul it comes to plunder;
You must relent and let it in, or feel its wrathful thunder.
Oh Oracle, all wise and knowing, fear inside me keeps on growing,
I can sense a chill wind blowing, filling me with dread;
Although your words seem strange and hollow, I submit and gladly follow,
For I know the God Apollo guides the path you tread;
Wise Apollo takes your hand and guides the path you tread.
--
What sweet exquisite joy I'm feeling, giddily my head is reeling,
Days have passed and find me kneeling at my sweethearts feet;
Oh Oracle, I will not tarry, asking her if she will marry,
Saving me from malady, she makes my soul complete;
She drives away the malady and makes my soul complete.
May 3, 2014
May 3, 2014 at 4:45 AM UTC
Falling down and down,
wings melting to wax
until he's submerged
in inky blackness.
Falling from the
clear blue sky,
away from the
glowing, golden orb
hung high above in the air
that he flew too high, too close to
in admiration and enthrallment.
Is this treachery,
is this betrayal?
Of the sky?
Of the sun?
Of the freedom
he'd giddily reveled in?
Is he not supposed
to consider it as such?
Even as he tries to steal
a breath from the cruel water
of the capricious and cold ocean,
gasping and painfully alone?
Jul 25, 2016
Jul 25, 2016 at 8:28 PM UTC
one
tumbled
out of the womb
convulsing
like a breakdancer
five
posed with
lights & cigarettes,
light
eight
lipstick smeared
giddily on the
backhand
twelve
bought birth control
shared among friends
pills split with a jacknife
sixteen
fascinated by
violet waves
& crystal castles
twenty-one
cancer of the soul
flask in her ribs
she moves
among suitors
like whispers of fame
twenty-two
nosering replaced
polished for the wake
croptop in the casket
Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 1:29 AM UTC
Oh my rose in bell jar!
From time to time I watch you from afar,
Keeping you in my peripheral vision
avoiding the precision
to acknowledge your decaying red;
But I notice
You've become more lively
in this unbearable gray time,
Tell me
is it your favourite crime
to mock my remaining solitude?
Isn't suggesting doubtful hope
to a dying person start of a cruel dispute?
Ah! I've known that cruelty you're trying so hard to resurrect,
You were the witness once
And You know he was the only one
That ever charming prince on a white horse
Seemed like a promising escape from my fancy confinement, eh?
With a swooning smile he bought my hospitality
And I fell in hope,
He claimed he had never seen such a beauty
Oh I wish I told him then
this beauty will last
till her awaited twenty first;
Forbidden to leave the cage
doomed with a witch's rage;
That could've spared me
from this additional catastrophe
of heartbreak;
Let me continue;
Soon shy smiles and secret glances
bloomed into hearty laughs and sensual dances
And I had never felt more beautiful in anyone's presence;
My gloomy fort now welcomed these festive winds
And I giddily waited for my blossoming spring ;
But somebody should've told me that nothing feels bitter
than the failed exchange of hearts ;
You see,
I gave him colours
but with that he painted another visage from his past,
Love rekindled in his heart and it was me left with burns and scars;
But instead of blood there were sparkles
that kept my vision lighted and filled my imaginary with scenes from dreamy novels;
And I got addicted these mocking hopes again;
So, my dear rose in bell jar!
Tell me are these imaginations bewitching you too?
Are you blushing or are you angry? You're being too red to give me a clue;
Mar 18, 2023
Mar 18, 2023 at 7:21 PM UTC
the beach is for losing yourself
i ask you what manner of man or beast could ignore its siren song
it dragged our silly smiles across the sand
feet trailing giddily behind us
we slipped wearied into the warm unceasing avalanche
and a year was washed away
in the thunderous salt rinse
the beach is for best friends and for beer
it is for games beneath the stars
while a plankton metropolis fluoresced underfoot
and a meteor grazed the spine of leo
we slumbered through brooding rains
that slunk away when we awoke to stare them down
white shapes cast slender shadows on the reeds at noon
sea breezes crooned tunes every child has always known
in languages no man will ever understand
the beach is for all of us
last night we dreamt of ancestral slimes marching out of it
today let us plunge in
it is for even creeping snakes and gnawing fleas
verily
but most of all
it is for your glistening face
for two sleepy seagreen eyes accustoming themselves to the bright shores of morning
while your coffee cooled on the camp stove
it is for the sheen of your wild brown arms
the surf of your laughter
words with which you filled a quiet moment
circling in my mind like gulls over the harbor
yes most of all
most of all
it is for you
speeding down the narrow cape
i was beside you
tapping in tandem with your electronic music
realizing more with every pastel cottage flickering by
that you had found me
and i had never felt
so safe
Jun 9, 2013
Jun 9, 2013 at 3:25 AM UTC
People -
so many bodies…
Some seem to engage
for but a moment, of course,
before bustling past on hot sidewalks,
with varied smidgens of mind and heart;
collections of vibrating chemistry,
moving to specific oscillations.
How to make sense of it all?
We can be drawn to warm embers,
avoid icy slaps on our cheeks reddening.
Grey shapes pass us by, hardly registering a blip -
are they nothing more than the flotsam of flailing limbs
echoing our own caustic needs and wants pending?
Yet we all want much the same things in life:
to be noticed with kindness by the benign,
safe from the razor-blade elements,
find our slot in life that counts,
and leave something good
for posterity, if it comes…
For dots of humanity
of which we are a part,
in some fashion or another,
keep floating giddily past us…
Are they up for what will come
with stoic resistance, or neglect?
Do they expect some dystopia
and the terrors of a dark night?
Ask the fretting little children,
who can’t sleep for their fright!
They too need a river of peace ~
the Promise to be fulfilled
made by One wiser
than all else…
~~
Mar 16, 2023
Mar 16, 2023 at 7:58 PM UTC
it was hard not to notice
her suffocating stance
eliminating life
from breath
stark contrasts clashed
chemist stench rife
clawed nails fought
with burnt electric hair
face caked with
false promise
rude lips bled
in twisted shapes
mismatched words
shot giddily from
handgun mind
long since spent
guests' amused disdain
stilled at sharp madness
flashes of veined sclera
screamed woe
signatures etched on
death warrants
coffin lids
clamped shut
wild assertions
rank religious fervor
vomited about
a hushed room
charity's stretched
compassion quit
in rush to regain
a summer's peace
efforts to impress
stabbed coarsely
dense air strangled
rational thought
guilty images beset
tortured space
noxious noise
begging revolt
yet collective dagger
falls aside mute
lest honour
too is lost
as raucous gasps fail
to impress
with anything
less than
dreams
of a quiet book
easily wooed
by a silent stream
Dec 15, 2016
Dec 15, 2016 at 2:37 PM UTC
God, I miss you
I miss you!
(You miss me more)
but I highly doubt it
Does it ache in your chest
when you think of how warm
my breath is on your lips?
Do your knees tremble and buckle
beneath you after imagining our last kiss?
Do you find yourself squirming
giddily in your seat when you
recall something sweet I said
to you when we were in bed?
Does your skin crawl with
anticipation for our next encounter?
Do your fingers fidget when
the urge to divulge emotion is so
strong you want to punch things?
Do you fight yourself daily to just
keep yourself at bay in fear
of smothering me? Something tells
me by your delay in replies
and your nonchalant guise
that you don’t miss me more
than I miss you.
May 22, 2014
May 22, 2014 at 2:57 AM UTC
Break your back over
my heart three times &
claim it's body poetry.
Knock on wood & pray
Zeus didn't hear you.
You say you know no better,
but I've seen the malice in your eyes the
moment before our lips touch & I am
afraid; I love it.
Trust you trust you trust you..
Why would you beg I trust you?
You knew from the second you
saw me that you would end up
covering me in kisses the way
lava covered Pompeii
& giddily watch as I suffer when
you leave me to dry.
You are so heartachingly beautiful,
&, as the daughter of Apollo, I am
obligated to let the son of Aphrodite know;
my father was the brightest star
until nineteen years ago.
Oct 15, 2014
Oct 15, 2014 at 3:47 PM UTC
He never taught me
how to perform
the art of the jump-shot.
I simply watched.
He would dribble down
the clumsy circle
of our carport, back up
behind the exomaed bicycle
and detach his body
from the world, against
gravity’s insistent pull
and fade into a legend,
his wrist becoming a swan
pecking toward the sun.
He never taught me
how to arc a blade,
the gripping bite of a razor,
against my cheek.
I simply watched. He would
lather his face with foam
and I sat conversing with him
as the blade giddily glided,
graceful as a demi-god
reaping the crop of auburn
from his then young face.
When I tried, as a teenager,
I nicked my upper lip and
only harvested my own blood.
When he grilled, he flipped
the meat like an ace of spades,
magic in his wrist revealed.
When he drove, his hands
and feet became extensions
of the car. When he drove
a bus, his eyes sought all angles
of the road, chatoyant caution
in the flicker of his iris.
When he fiddled with our old,
beaten, mellow-toned guitar
he was articulate though
he never knew a chord’s name
nor what song erupted from him.
He read the Bible, but kept
the gospel in his eyes, at the tip
of his green thumb. He read
the Koran, the Torah, the words
of Gotham. I read how he
sought truth, beauty, in all
people. I simply watched him
traverse the dividing line
between saint and stubborn,
between sinner and relinquish.
If there was ever a man
after some God’s heart, he was
one who asked questions
and lived into the answers.
He kept his hands clean, kept
his chin high and mind
was always lofty and companioned
with a world of dreams.
He would often stare out windows
sitting at the dinner table, and I
knew he was living into a prayer.
I never asked what he was doing,
never asked how to do what he
could do. What my Father taught me
was to listen to my own inner voice,
no other’s, and if I wanted to be
a man, I was to simply watch
what a man did for that spoke
a language more fluid than air.
Jun 22, 2015
Jun 22, 2015 at 11:47 AM UTC
We'll stroll one day
Down a country lane,
Palms together, flesh to flesh,
Stopping to kiss
In sunshine-dappled glades.
My hawthorne hero, holding me
against you as we gaze,
Stopping to laze
Upon each other,
Drunk on heat and sweat and summer ***
The scents of oh, everything, including us
And we are all.
Giddily, we'll fall
Together. I will know
What it is to lie with you and laugh,
*********** happiness in warm spurts
As you take me in your arms,
Fondling your possession
Finding me forever willing
Following me, fascinated, into the hot, hot
Summer of our lives.
Apr 13, 2015
Apr 13, 2015 at 4:30 PM UTC
stoked lightening, does where your fur stroked unmeeting skin
a ribbon grow heating wetly (at fingers tightly coiling sin)?
does where from stocky steam ****** ***** effuse drunk blood,
a stagger of giggling ****** giddily unstoppably bud?
perhaps, or, does (i know) your unknowing skirt a mutter
a rill of sweetness (acrid) as like honey and butter?
A query, i think, your parting question answers.
At cherry pressing; at crimson lancer.
Dec 18, 2012
Dec 18, 2012 at 4:13 AM UTC
Whisper sweetly into my ear
and let your breath caress my neck
as your words lap at my mind and flood it.
Run your hands gently through my hair
and down my spine
to rest on the small of my back.
Lay your head upon my breast
and feel the beat of the wings of
a million butterflies on your temples.
Mark a path of light touch
from my neck and along my collarbone
and let your lips follow closely after.
Leave blooms of purple roses
across my hips and pink half-moons
down my thighs.
Breathe me in deeply, and feel me
taking the place of oxygen,
and swimming through your veins.
Making your head spin giddily
with fancies surreal
as I dance in your heart's meadow
and set the butterflies free.
Oct 3, 2012
Oct 3, 2012 at 2:13 AM UTC
It's funny how when we are young
We're taught to be honest
Told that the truth is the best
By adults who deal only in lies
Because honestly they've learned
To fear the truth
And what do we get in return?
Panic attacks from (just thinking about)
how our parents will handle
precious, treasured truths that
we hold in our hearts and
giddily whisper to each other in the dark
with a sense of danger and adrenaline
Yet we can't help but want to share them
with each other, with adults, with the world
(look how beautiful and new and vulnerable it is
this truth that I've hidden in my heart)
Because we were taught to be honest
We long to be honest
But are afraid our precious truths will be tainted
By this society of lies
Created by people who say they love us and want the best for us
But if they really care that much
Then why
Why make it so painful to let you know
What we want the most
What we think is best
To share with the people we love what we love
Dec 29, 2016
Dec 29, 2016 at 3:38 AM UTC
The hunky lad passed me smiling.
I sat and wondered what he was into.
I spent the next short time whiling.
Did he like the same things I like to do?
Was it possible he’d find me beguiling?
Or was I just a romantic Ford Pinto;
A bit of data barely suitable for filing?
Not worth a kiss let alone a good *****
Thus run the silent mental maunderings
Of a fool with little else but fanciful wishes
As he went about his chores like laundering
Dusting, vacuuming and washing dishes.
Dreams like those of a damsel in a castle
Drug me away from the drudgery of the day.
And helped me not see life as a hassle;
Instead it made my mind a place to play.
If fortune could send a lucky handyman
To fix something I didn’t know was broken
I could think it was a very dandy plan
And that God was sending me a token.
Almost like a voice was whispering to me
Everything is gonna be okay, my child.
So go ahead and celebrate giddily.
Your life is will soon go from mild to wild.
Oh yes, I would sing and dance in joy
Around my tiny rent-controlled home.
God was going to send a perfect boy
So he would never again need to roam.
He could stop here in his **** travels
And I would make him so glad that he did.
He could stop pounding the gravel;
Just stay with me, almost on the skids.
I’d serve him chicken from the Colonel
I have lots of coupons I’ve set aside.
Maybe he’d like something from McDonalds.
I would set the table with great pride.
And I would make sure there was wine
By the lovely gallon, here for him to drink.
If he wanted a more inexpensive kind
He wouldn’t really even have to blink.
Yes I would make a lower-class heaven
With our modest Rent-a-Center stuff.
I’d do the scutwork twenty-four seven.
I do it all now, it is nothing that tough.
He would only have to love me madly.
Life would be a fairy tale for both of us.
He’d consent to stay forever gladly;
Life would be simply, totally marvelous.
Dec 19, 2016
Dec 19, 2016 at 12:56 PM UTC
In the Land of Dreams
Where no desolation reigns
The heart is light and gay
Absent the misery of loves pain
The soul is unburdened and free
To tip toe giddily among the stars
Or plunge wildly into green salty seas
In the land of dreams
There is no echo
Of suffering human cries
The spirit is cleansed forever of its grief
Death’s hand close no eyes
In the land of dreams
@ Tammy. M. Darby Nov. 18, 2016
Nov 18, 2016
Nov 18, 2016 at 11:11 AM UTC
In this darkness, life
I see not
I feel not, but you
As time passes silently
Minutes per minutes
Days per days
I sense not, but you
To helplessness I submit
In this pitch intoxication
I am not, but you
With the desert singers
I am back, with you
Reclining us all on darkness
By the fire, in submission
pupils’ burning in eyes closed
This tavern serves only
Without, within with you
To the ones with cups
Or no cups at all
I smile giddily, with you
They sing feverishly
Drumming just a plate
Strumming just two stings
To the universes’ rhythm
I drink all, with you
Aged in lovers’ veins
And they sing
Of clay pots and rivers
Of birds and prays
Of dervishes and kings
Of me and you
On the desert sand
Wine flows like the soul
I desire all is more
I desire all is you
In this darkness, life
Open me to enter you
Take me from me
To vanish me in
Darkness and me
Life and you
Mar 8, 2015
Mar 8, 2015 at 5:20 PM UTC
My heart is a bloodhound,
Relentless in nature.
Bounding giddily toward oblivion.
Without remorse
or comprehension.
My heart is a hammer,
Blunt, forceful.
Each obstacle in its path
a nail.
My heart is driftwood,
Lost among the waves,
Ebb and flow —
Futile.
Without destination.
Nov 23, 2014
Nov 23, 2014 at 3:45 PM UTC
My gaze ascends over a hue of celery
officially labeled "yellow wax pepper"
but most definitely a gentle backdrop
holding securely the reminders
of all the love the world has given me.
My toothless, cow-licked, mussed-up babes....
perfect in every way.
Across the room
a single stem stands straight and tall
deep magenta peony
plucked and giddily gifted.
A token of sweet adoration
and a gentle reminder to receive love
when it is offerred.
Under the canopy of my white tree
the green green leaves
comfort me.
A sanctuary, my own little world
in which I can listen
for the chatter and giggles
lose myself in wonder anew
awash in a world-true.
Jun 23, 2014
Jun 23, 2014 at 5:33 PM UTC
I cut my hair just to see if it would grow back.
It was long, thick, and somewhere between
Light brown and strawberry blonde.
I hung my head upside down
And ran my fingers through the eighteen inches
Of snigs and snags and knots
For the final time.
It wasn't silky.
It wasn't particularly soft.
I gathered it into a ponytail
And
Chop, chop, chop
Thousands of tiny hairs cried out
And tumbled to the floor en masse.
I shook my head about
Flinging my shorter hairs into my eyes.
I glowed with the feeling of liberation
While I shivered from the cold on my bare neck
So I stared at the fallen golden rope
Part gleefully, part mournfully
And I waited,
Warily and giddily and wonderingly,
For my hair to grow back.
I tell you this, not to explain
That old photo of me where I look like a boy,
But so that you can understand that
If one day I decide to push you away,
I'll only be waiting.
Jan 14, 2013
Jan 14, 2013 at 8:59 PM UTC
I’m so sick
of dreaming of you
falling asleep
and you’re back in my life
the mistakes we made
the fights we had
we words we said
all forgiven
I’m back in your arms
my heart swells with happiness
you’re back!
I want to scream
I want to cry
I want to shout giddily
and I’m back!
back where
I’m always longing to be
but then
I awake
and a bucket of ice water
runs down my face
down my back
stealing the breath
from out of my chest
I’m needing a life vest
I need someone to help me
because
I am not in your arms
we have not forgiven each other
and you are so, so far away
Sep 20, 2019
Sep 20, 2019 at 10:52 AM UTC
I'd at least like to lurk in your subconscious mind
if I my hands can't wander
through your forest of hair
or your smooth sands of skin.
At least, I'd like to sit in the smallest
chamber of your heart
giddily pulling the strings
if I can't dive in to a chocolatey iris
or curl up in your fleshy twigs.
I'd like, at least, for you to wonder
if I've melted into someone else's body
wonder if I've touched someone
who made me feel like a bit more
human than you could.
Because I sit and wonder often
about the past form of you and I,
I would die upon any indication
that you do not.
May 4, 2014
May 4, 2014 at 12:08 AM UTC
I have not forgotten how it felt to be reckless at 17 and alive
Purchasing the cheapest bottle of chemicals with the highest volume from that shabby 24 hour petrol station.
I have not forgotten how it felt to stay up until sunrise
Tresspassing in privately owned fields before phoning home to say goodnight and lying about sleepovers at well to do houses.
I have not forgotten how it felt to giddily kiss my best friend until we fell asleep
Only to realise he had fallen in love as the stars fell away and summers amber blaze crept up over the hill.
I have not forgotten the quite car journeys home
Driving away from those memories those summers and those friends although they have all misplaced the colour of my eyes and the echoes of our laughs -
I have not forgotten.
May 22, 2016
May 22, 2016 at 9:14 PM UTC