Still, in the fourth quarter
Disabled, a depressed hoarder
Permeation meets ideation
Tectonic joints sliding away
Collapsing Ebony Atlas
In ruin and decay
Water and rock erode away
Overwhelm and pressure
Leading to the break
Dreaming about the long sleep
Paralyzed while awake
I want to stay up late and write about everything I hate
Everything stemming from a lack of humanity
Why am I living through this time of insanity
Is it to make me stronger, capable of anything great?
It is more pain and struggle to endure
More thoughts to flood my waking mind
and stifle my gasping breath
What a time to be alive
when close contact is killer
and true vulnerability is exposure
When connection is weak and the circuits are short
Isolation is preferred to stave that depression wave
that everyone rides at some breaking point or another
The swell is huge and I have had my fill
Swimming to the bank to cash my earnings in clothes
Drinking alkaline for balance over all of the swill
Doomsday prepping for anything goes
Leaning on what’s left of my will
Quarantine life kinda blows.
Soft as a fledgling
caressing my face
Inspired by the transcendent winds I felt yesterday.
As the sun swelters,
I wear the sky with clouds
to keep me light and breezy.
Inspired by a blue dress with specks of blue and white flowers on this hot summer day.
I wonder if people wonder
about me, and if I’m worth
remembering, when I’m projecting
my voice yet can barely hear
my piece over the weight of
the feast. Looking like a snack
won’t sate these beasts. It’s hard
to know your place–when you are
where you’re supposed to be, yet
feel like you don’t belong anywhere.
When the instant reaction to express
your heart lies locked in the spark of
executive dysfunction, and the moment
has wafted away like the lingering smell
stale of yesterday; inner-critique quelling
my own lips from yelling to command
a room’s attention. Not to mention my
vanity lies in personality, skill, intrigue
lack of chatter implies a vestige of depth
for one to sink beneath the surface
yet I wade in opaque waters, watching
reflections to learn just what it is
that ignites hearts that burn
Scorpio moon self in full effect **edit: Libra moon is what I possess*
I plan to unlock
untapped potential to reach
heights I've not yet known.
I will not attack
my lack of activity.
I am still alive.