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The fakeness of fake reality
is in reality ...
and is of no consequence.
If you, in reality,
are fake
the consequence of the fakeness
is - your reality,
Ipso facto, this consequence,
your - fakeness
should cease, in reality
or - prepare for consequences
which - in reality - won't be fake.

The Fakeness Of Fake Reality   Michael C Crowder 17th March  2019
Just thinking out loud
Big Virge Nov 2014
Ya know ......

When your art's your closest friend
It can tear you apart .....
If you won't just bend
To become a ... "famous star" ...
But ...
I guess like Common says ...
One day ... oh yes ... !!!
It'll all make sense ...
The struggles that we go through
To simply make ... progress ...
Or taste what's called ... "Success" ...
You see .....
you've got to keep your head ...
when facing those with less ...
especially when you're striving
to make your art transcend ...
even when they're driving ...
their Lexus or their Benz ...
Remember ... in the end
"True Talent" ... outshines them
because they're ... "Talentless"
The fools who move ...
with shady crews ...
who choose to use ...
people ... like tools
usually refuse ...
to face ... "The Truth" ...
One day it's True ...
they're bound to lose ...
and pay their dues ...
because of lies ...
they have contrived ...
to have their lives ...
in the ... "Limelight" ...
See they're not so nice ... !!!
whether girls or guys ...
guys who have ...
No ***** Size ... !!!!!
or girls who like to ...
spread their thighs ...
tend to use ...
their devious minds ...
to get a slice ...
of the five-star life ...
by hitching ... rides ...
and ... being sly ...
So don't be surprised ...
You tend to find
that ... "talentless mules" ...
"avoid" ... art school ...
If you love your art ...
could you ever choose ...
to follow the path ...
these people do ... ???
Would you choose ... to bend over
for a NEW ... Range Rover ... !?!
or .......
Spread your thighs ... ???
to get a contract signed ... ???
See ... many have fallen ...
by the wayside ...
and have then withdrawn ...
from the publics' eyes ...
leaving the public ...
wondering ...... ??? .......
....... " Why " ........ !?!
Some have paid the ultimate price
and lost their lives ...
or tried suicide ...
before it was time ...
to end their lives ... !!!
The price of fame ...
is getting high ...
just like ... "Price Hikes" ...
What would you pay ... ?
to see your face ...
all over the place ...
Would you sell your soul ...
to become well-known ... ???
Quite a few now do ...
and that's no joke ... !!!
They end up broke ...
with the devil in tow ...
"Louis-Cypher" ... knows ...
No Soul ... No Show ... !!!!!
just the Final Crossroads ....
If you don't believe me ....
Ask ... "Ralph Macchio !!!!!"
Life it seems ...
can be like a movie ...
what you choose to seek ...
may become ... "Your Destiny !!!" ...
So please beware ...
what you choose to dream ...
may result in ...  
... "Nightmares !!!" ...
Be careful what you wish for ... !!!
cos it may come true ...
The Wishmaster ... proves
that it's ... "NOT" ... all good ... !!!
The world's not yours ... !!!
You're just a pawn ...
so ... make smart moves ...
and leave the devil ... forlorn ... !!!
Stay true to your art ...
and you'll get rewards ...
You don't have to be a star ...
to receive ... awards ...
Awards can be received ...
in many forms ...
trust me ... believe ...
If your art has a cause ...
One day you'll see ...
your art-form ... SOAR ... !!!!!
but it may come from ...
an unlikely source ... ???
Someone might say ...
that you've made their day
and have changed their ways
from a path of hate
to a " Higher Place " ... !!!
where their misplaced hates ...
now been .... "Erased" ....
No amount of pay ...
can replicate ...
that feeling of ...
affecting change ...
in someone who ...
has never met you ... !!!!!
A feeling that nice ...
truly has ... No Price ...
when what you've done ...
has ... "Touched Someone" ...
No Fakeness, Lies or Fabrication
Creation designed through Reflection
is art that has no ... Pretensions ...
Heed these words ...
and you will learn ...
how to cherish your art ...
it can help you breathe ...
just like your heart ...
but ... can tear you "apart" ... !!!
like I said in this piece ...
at the very start ... !!!!!
Too many now abuse ...
the arts for loot ...
a fancy car or designer suit ... !?!
or just to prove ...
that they're better than you ... !!!
Well, whilst they lie ...
stick to my guide ...
and you will find ...
that you'll dent their pride
because it's ... "The Truth" ...
from which ... they hide
They'll try to deny ....
til' the day they die ....
but one day they'll find ...
their way to the light ...
The Light ... that shines ...
on those ... inclined ...
to stay true ... to the finish ...
from the very ... start ...
to this Beautiful Thing ....
that we call ................
...... " Art " .................
So much surrounds, artistic mouths, and artistic grounds, that earn artistry and artists ..... pounds .....
So, here are a few of my views, on, artistic moves ......
FARIDA Mar 2017
In a world full of fakeness
i stood out
all alone
but i had no doubt
i was right
and they were wrong
and I was sure
I don't belong

where are the people
who treat you right
the ones who talk good about you
no matter what time

i think this world
needs some of those
the ones who make you feel
like there is still hope

this generation is ruined
by the fake and the mean
but there are some good ones
stuck in between
those are the ones I call
to raise their voice

you and me
could rule the world
we could make it better

We have to save it fast
or i don't think it will last

to all the fake people
listen to me
what do you get for
lying to me
Lots of people inspired me to write this poem, it was all based on true events.
Bader Jul 2015
You can’t tell
How much fakeness in this world
Fake souls
Walking like deadly zombies
You can’t see it
Until it shows everything in front of you
For the right time and moment

When you realize that people have masks
And you don’t know which one to trust
They hide their ugly truth
From the public eye
Fake smiles
The creation of dramas
Start with them
Just to live the lies
That they put around
Their poison words
It will effects your mind
The true colors will show soon
It will effects their skin
Just like a chameleon

Wonders of life
Trying to survive the fakeness
You can’t read them
Until they show it
Music is the only real friend
That you trust
It keeps you real all the time
No matter what life gives you
It will be there for you
Megan Milligan Aug 2011
I. Shining Armor

To all those would-be knights in shining armore:
Make sure you have a goodly supply of silver polish on your person
Because this woman is sick and tired
Of all the tarnish she keeps running into.


Fakeness gets real old, real quick.

I ‘m looking for a man with manners, grace, respect and class.
Not someone who’ll ultimately turn out to be an ***.
I’m not looking for too much I think.
In fact, I’d given up looking at all
Because the lot of them weren’t worth the flesh
God poured their sorry souls into.

Then, you came along,
Swept me off my feet with your Leo hurricane-force personality.
Fire sign burning through my resolves and inhibitions
Until there was nothing left
But trembling and desires and hidden fantasies

But I thought I saw something behind that solid wall of sexuality
A dark knight in shining armor
Intelligence in every timbered vibration fo your baritone voice,
Smooth like Barry white,
****, I thought, you are the whole package!
Family man, gentleman, talented artistic man
Man who said women were to be respected
As they were God’s gift.

How many men, afterall, would walk you to the bus,
Stand in front of you
So the sun didn’t glare in your face, facing west.
A glowing halo surrounded your head.
My angel, mon amour
My knight in shining armor.

II. Tarnish

Fast forward to today.
Man up,
Or move on out of my life.
I’ve waited a long time
For someone with manners, grace, respect, and class.
I’m not going to waste my time
Waiting on as ***.
Not that you’ve been one, mon amour,
But I’m starting to see a little tarnish on your shining armor.

I try to be up front,
Give you the 411 on what’s going on
Is it too much to expect no less out of a relationship?
Honesty, communication
Lay everything on the line so no misunderstandings.
Maybe I’m setting myself up,
Blinded by the shine of your armor
And your promises spoken.
Soothed, hypnotized by the timbered vibration of your baritone voice.
Smooth like Barry White.
Okay, one more time, I will trust you.
On your knight’s honor,
My knight in slightly tarnished armor.

III. Tinfoil

I’m looking for a man
With manners, grace, respect, and class
Not someone who’ll ultimately turn out to be an ***,
And you crossed that line.
The shine is gone,
And no amount of silver polish is gonna wipe clean your tarnish.

You see, there are two things I hold sacred in relationships:
Honesty and keeping promises,
Both of which you failed miserably at as a man.
Yeah I set myself up for a fall as well,
Expecting no less than what I put in myself.

But what good is being together
If you’re the only one putting for any effort.
A relationship is supposed to be give and take.
Not giving and giving and giving and giving
And getting nothing in return
But a bad player’s broken promises
And a broken heart.

Gum stuck on the bottom of my shoe
Has more integrity than you do.
You lied to me.
You put things off.
I would’ve had more respect for you
If you gave me straight talk about flings
Or things like “This isn’t working out”
Instead of sweet talk that left a bad aftertaste in my mouth like saccharin.
The only part of you that ever told me the truth
Was more than happy to stand at attention
And speak volumes
Without saying a word.

And speaking of “not speaking,”
You know what really takes the cake?
You didn’t even have the mother-******* *****
To tell me yourself.
I had to find out from someone else.

Some say more shall be revealed.
Boy, were my eyes opened to the fact
That sometimes a knight in shinign armor
Is sometimes just a ****** wrapped in tinfoil.

So, to all those would-be knights in shining armore:
Make sure you have a goodly supply of silver polish on your person
Because this woman is sick and tired
Of all the tarnish she keeps running into.


Fakeness gets real old, real quick.

IV. Press Seven**

Seven is my lucky number.
It helped me to slam the door on your sorry ***
And a chapter in my life I don’t care to re-read.

How dare you
Call up one day out of the blue
And drop a message on my voicemail.
The second I heard “Hi,  it’s (insert name here)”
Seven dumped your *** faster than you dumped mine
Through a third-party representative.

I don’t want to hear any “Hi, How ya doin’s”
I don’t want to hear any reasons
Or excuses
Or glossing-overs of what you did.

I wasn’t kidding when I said
Fakeness gets real old, real quick,
And that goes for ***** like you.
I may be a big woman,
But I’m not the Big Easy.
I’m a woman of respect
And dignity.

So don’t bother e-mailing me.
Don’t bother calling me.
Delete me out of your rolodex
And go trolling down Fourth Street
If you want nothing but ***.

Never did pressing 7 to delete you
Feel so ****** good.
© 8/23/2010
(rev. 5/26/2011, added part 4)
The light of my life.
The poem of my tongue.
The fire of my chest.
The wind of my *****.
The hate I loathe.
The beauty I view.
My lady.
My dream.
My hesitant rainbow.
My fearless tears.
My coverlet and starlet;
my blanket and dainty amulet.
My distant promise and cautiousness;
but in all my darling; looking ever so stately-
yet not like yon faraway, morning dew.

The hands I adore;
the fingers I want to kiss.
The solitude I live in;
the fate I was born in.
A pair of eyes ever to me too divine,
A charm that loyally strikes, and glows and shines.
A lock of hair that petulantly sways and sweats.
A midday tale of love; as how it is mine,
a beauty that this world ensures,
but cannot adore.

Even the brisk turquoise sea
is ever less glossy than thy eyes,
for their calmness is still less harmful,
unlike unbending, thus insolent tides, at noon.
Ah, Matilda, thou art yet too graceful,
but tricky and indolent, as the puzzling moon!
Thy purity is like unseen smoke,
tearing the skies' linings like a fast rocket,
making me ever thirsty, turning my heart wet,
but still this attentive heart thou canst not provoke;
thou art a region too far from mine;
but still luck is in heart whose fate's in thine.
And as thou singeth a tone I liketh to sing
I cannot help but more admiring thee;
And as thou singeth it genuinely more,
thou capture all my breath and give it all a thrill;
for I realise then, that thou canst be stiff, as sandless shores;
but thy beauty canst so finely startle,
and whose startledness
canst ****.

But deadness, and ever desolation
are vividly clamouring in thy eyes;
Thou art but distinct, distinct indeed-from serenity;
for thou warble thyself, but gladly-away, from thy sullen reality.
Ah, Matilda, how canst a soul so comely
be hateful to fame, and dishonest just from its frame?
Matilda, to those merciless hearts indeed thou beareth no name;
Thou art a shame to their pride, and a stain to their bitterly fevered, sanity.
Yet still, thou art to innocent to understand which,
and in love naively, as thou just art, now-
with that feeble shadow of a pampered young fellow,
Whose stories are also mine,
for his father's money is donned,
and coined every day-by my servant's frail hands;
The sweat of my palms obey me in doing so-
I am my master's son's poor sailor,
and he his sole heir-and soon is to inherit
an indecent boat; full of roaming paths, doors, and locks
And at nights, costly drapery and jewels shall be planted in their hair-
yes, those beastly riches' necks, and skin fair,
And thou be their eternal seamstress,
weaving all those bare threads with thy hands-
ah, thy robust ****** hands,
whilst thy heart so dutifully levitating
about his false painting, and bent even more heartily, onto him.
Ah, 'tis indeed unfair, unfair, unfair-and so unfair!
For such a liar he was, and still is-
Once he was betrothed to a bitter, and uncivil Magdalene;
Uncivil so is she, prattling and bickering and prattling and bickering-
To our low-creature ears, as she once remarked,
She who basked in her own vague hilarity, and sedate glory
And so went on harshly unmolested by her vanity, and fallibility;
But sadly indeed, occupied with a great-not intellect,
As not sensible a person as she was;
At least until the winds knocked her haughty voices out-
and so then hovering stormy gales beneath,
took her out and gaily flung her deep into the raging sea.

Still he wiggled not, and seems still-in a seance every night,
whenst he but cries childishly and calls out to her name in fright.
Her but all dead, dead name;
'Till his father tears him swiftly out of his solitude
And with altogether the same worried face
but drags his disconcerted son back into his flamboyant chamber.
Ah, and I caught thee again, Matilda,
Bowed over the picture of yon young sailor;
'Twixt those sweet-patterned handkerchiefs
On thy lil' wooden table, yesterday
And curved over yon picture, I was certain;
I caught some fatigued tears in thy eyes-
for from thy love thou wert desperate,
but still unsure even, of the frayed tyings of cruel fate.
Ah, Matilda, your hair is still as black as the night
The guilty night, though nothing it may knoweth, of thy love,
and perhaps just as unknowing it seemingly is;
as th' tangled moon, and its dubious arrows
of unseen lilies, above
Shall singeth in uncertainty; and cordless dignity
And which song shall forever be left unreasoned
Until the end of our days arrive, and bereft us all
of this charismatic world-and all its dearest surge of false,
and oftentimes unholy, fakeness.
Oh Matilda, but such truest clarity was in thy eyes,
And frightened was I-upon seeing t'is;
As though never shrouded in barren lies
Like a love that this heart defines;
but never clear, as never is to be gained.
Ah, Matilda, and such frank clarity dismays me;
It threatens and stiffens and chortles me,
for I am certain I shan't be with thee-
and shall ever be without thee,
for thou detest and loathe me,
and be of no willingness at all-
to befriend, to hold, or to hear-
much less reward me with thy love,
as how I shall reward thee with mine.

Matilda, this love is too strong-but so is, too poor
And neither is my heart plainly bruised;
For it is untouched still, but feeling like it has been flawed
Ah, why does this love have to be raw-and far indeed, too raw!
I, who is thy resilient friend, and fellow-sadly never am in thy flavour;
for in his soul only-thy love is rooted;
And this love is forever never winning-and it is sour,
Like a torn, mute flower; or like a better not, laughter.
And my heart is once more filled with dead leaves-
Ah, dead, dead leaves of undelight, and unjoy;
Whose cries kick and bend and strangle themselves-
all to no avail, and cause only all its devouring to fail,
For his doorless claws are to strong,
Stealing thy eyes from me for all day,
and duly all night long.
How discourteous! Virtual, but too far, still-
corrupting me; ah, unjust, unjust, and discourteous!
Tormentingly-ah, but tormentingly, torturously, insincere!
Ah, Matilda! But soon as thou prayeth,
every single grace and loveliness thou shall delicately saith;
Thy voice is as delightful as nailed, or perhaps, cunningly deluded vice-
Which I hath always feigned to be refuting tomorrow,
but is only to bring me cleverer and cleverer sorrow
'Till hath I no power to defy its testy soul,
that for no reason is too shiny and bold,
but so dull, and bland as a hard-hearted summer glacier,
and too unyielding as hurtful, talloned wines.
Oh, but no appetite I hath, for any war
against him-for he is fair, and I am not,
He is worthier of thee, than my every word;
He who to thee is like a graceful poem,
he who is the only one to smirk at
and hush away thy daylight doom.
Matilda! For evermore thy heart is mine;
and mine only-though I canst love thee
only secretly, and admire thee from afar,
Still cannot I stand bashful, and motionless-too far,
For I wish to hath been born, for thy every sake
Though it shall put my sinless tongue at stake
And even my love is even gentler then blue snowflakes;
and more cordial than yon rapturous green lake.
Ah! Look! Upon the moors the grass is swirling,
so please go back now; and be greedy in thy running.
Still when no music is playing,
all is but too painful for thee,
which I liketh to neither witness, nor see,
for upon thee the moon of love might not be singing,
as it is upon all others a song,
But somehow to nature it not be wrong,
for he cannot still be thy charm, nor darling.
O-but I hate thinking of which affectionately,
when thou crieth and which sight, to my heart, is paining.
Ah, Matilda! For even to God thy love is but too pure;
for it is faultless as morns, and poisonless-
like those ever unborn thorns;
Of yon belated autumn melody,
But is, somehow, fraught and dejected
With sorrow, for it is him, that yesterday and now
Thou loveth softly and securely,
Two hours later and perhaps, in every minute of tomorrow.

Matilda! But still tell me, how can thou securely love a danger?
For I am sure he is but a danger to thee, indeed;
Once I witnessed how his face
grotesquely thrusted into furtive anger
As he burst into a dearth of strong holds,
of his burning temper-under the blooming red birch tree;
And as every eye canst see,
He is only soft, and perhaps meek-as a butterfly,
Whenever the world he eats and sleeps and feeds on in-
Tellest him not the least bit of a lie;
Ah, Matilda, canst I imagine thee being his not,
ah, for I shall be drowned in deflating worry, indeed-I shall be, I shall be!
I dread saying t'is to thee-but he, the heir of a ruthless kingdom,
and kingdom of our God not-within their lands and reigns of scrutiny,
His words are but a tragedy, and a pain thou ought not to bear;
O, Matilda, thou art but too holy and far too fair!
Thy soul is, so that thou knoweth, my very own violin-
To which I am keenly addicted;
I am besotted with thy red cheeks-;
As whose tunes-my violin's, are thy notes
as haunting and sunnily beautiful,
And cloudless like thy naivety,
Which stuns my whole nature,
and even the one of our very own Lord Almighty.
Ah, Matilda, even the heavens might just turn out
far too menial for thee;
and their decorum and sweet tantrums idle and unworthy;
Thou art far, far above those ladies in dense gowns,
With such terseness they shall storm away and leave him down.
But why-why still, he refuses to look at thee!
Ah, unthinking and unfeeling,
foolish and coquettish,
unwitted and full of deceit-is himself,
for loving should I be-if thy smile were what I wished,
and thy blisses and kisses were what I dreamed;
I wouldst be but warmer than him,
I wouldst be but indeed so sweet,
I wouldst be loftier than he may seem;
and but madden thee every sole day, with my gracious-
though sometimes ferocious-ah, by thy love, ever tender wit.

I hath so long crept on a broken wing,
And thro' endless cells of madness, haunts, and fear,
Just like thou hath-and as relentlessly, and lyrically, as we both hath.
But not until the shining daffodils die, and the silvery
rivers turn into gold-shall I twist my love,
and mold it into roughness-
undying, but enslaved roughness;
that thou dread, and neither I adore;
For for thee I shall remain,
and again and again stay to find
what meaningful love is-
Whilst I fight against the tremor
and menace this living love canst bring about-
To threaten my mask, and crush my deep ardor.
Ah, my mask that hath loved thee too long,
With a love so weak but at times so strong;
and witnessed thee I hath, hurt and pained
and faded and thawed by his nobility
But one of worldliness; and not godliness
For heavens yonder shall be ours, and forever
Shall bestow us our triumphs, though only far-in the hereafter;
Still I honour thee, for holding on with sincerity-
and loyalty, to such contempt too strong
For thou art as starry as forgiveness itself,
and thus is far from yon contempt-and its overbearing soul;
And perhaps friendly, too unkind not-
like its trepid blare of constant rejection, and mockery
And as I do, shall I always want thee to be with me;
For thou art the mere residue, and cordial waning age of the life that I hath left;
For thou art the only light I hath, and the innate mercy I shall ever desire to seek;
and perhaps have sought shall, within the blessed soul of my 'ture wife.
Oh, Matilda, thou art the dream t'at I, still, ought not to dream,
thou art the sweetness I ought' only charm, and keep;
As thou art the song, that I may not be right'd to sing;
but the lullaby; which in whose absence, I canst shall never sleep.
Dead lover Mar 2017
I accepted for the sake of your exams,
That i am a bad human,
A fake human,
One into emotional drama,
One who's life is fake..  Fake.. And fake..

Fake fake fake and fake...
Your lover did use this word so easily,
I still feel the cuts in me..

I accept what i am not for you Oh best friend,
I accepted the fakeness... And did put it to the end..
Am just so free,  for everybody...

I remember my words...
I won't ever talk to you,
Oh best friend...
I can't put into words how much it hurts,
Am sorry that i was so " fake"....
I never knew I was..
Don't Know why does she think so....

You are my support..
And look,  we are never going to talk to each other...
Well you have your support...
But what about mine?
I feel so Terrible about myself..
I feel like dying...

Oh best friend, am such a useless best friend,
Who's phone number is not even worth trying..

You have done bundles of favors for me,
But your girl has always left me crying...

Just one wish from you oh friend,
Kiss the forehead of my corpse,
The day i be dead...

And whisper what had been my fault in my ear...
Oh friend so dear....
Wandisa Zwane Oct 2015
Written by

Wandisa Zwane  

April 16, 2015


It's 02:31 am and I find myself laying silently on my bed scrolling through Instagram...Twitter...Tumblr....and Snapchat. I find myself struggling to go to sleep.  I wasn't even able to sleep for an hour or two. It's not normal as its way past my curfew. I receive a text message. I'm confused because it's
still too early for anyone to be texting me, and I know everyone nearby is fast asleep because we have school. So who could be texting me?


HER ( via text )

I'm struggling with the math homework, help ? Are you up ?

ME ( via text )

I am actually. FaceTime, call or text?

20 minutes later my phone starts ringing. She was FaceTiming me. I stare at her name for about 5 seconds trying to put myself together.


Hello, Ellie

I wasn't focused on the math. I was hoping that we could forget about the math and just talk about us and the futility of life. For some stupid reason I really thought you were gonna say something cheesy like I can't get you out of my head but can we just talk until we fall in love? But no it never happened as we had an hour long conversation about math.


The futility in that conversation was cosmic to the point where I began questioning existence. But when the call finally ended I was disappointed.


It's 8am and I'm at sitting in English tired and drained. Still contemplating about the futility of life.


Hey, Tyler thanks for helping me with the math homework.


Uhm Ellie do you want to come over too my apartment over the weekend and chill ?


It's 12am and the apartment is really untidy. I jump out of bed and clean the entire apartment in a record time of 12 minutes and 44 seconds. I'm going crazy over here as I'm trying to remember if I gave her the correct directions. Thank god I gave her the correct directions as I see the uber pulling up in front of the apartment complex. I start sweating and shaking and I'm fearful that I'm going to have a nervous breakdown. I start cringing.
I open the door the door and it's her standing directly in front of me. I can't breathe. I'm overwhelmed by an awe of emotions. Literally - she's beautiful


I mumbled - Hey Ellie it's so good to see you ( the hug was very awkward because I was nervous - it was one of those hugs where both people don't know how to hug each which makes things really awkward)




So glad you could make it. How was the drive ( note to self: I should stop making things awkward ) I'm so irritated at myself.


She's sitting on the couch. And I'm sitting right next to her. Okay let's just say there was a 30cm gap between the both of us. I was really nervous. I found myself drinking gallons of water. I forgot to offer her anything. I was nervous to the point where I couldn't even make eye contact. I just stared at her forehead and her lips.


Aren't you exhausted I mean that drive was really long ( she lived like 3 blocks away from me )


Not really , I'm just really stressed about varsity and stuff I guess.

We actually start conversing with one another for 5 hours straight.We smoke about 3 cigarettes and have the most fruitful conversation ever about female energy and the power of the the heart. She's really enlightened - I thought she was really basic. We both can't go to sleep because we're actually  enjoying the presence of one another. It was cathartic and refreshing actually.


Want go up to the roof and look at the universe?


I'd love too.


I brought a blanket up to the roof cause I thought it was cold. It wasn't but we just layed down underneath the open night sky and gazed into the stars. We connected with the universe/ourselves/each other. It was bliss. We ended up falling asleep on top of the roof. To my amazement we were silently wrapped around each other.



( chuckling )
How'd you sleep


( Smiling )
I slept pretty well.


Do you have any plans for today?


YES actually...


The sun is setting and she still hasn't packed her bags.


When are you leaving?

She said she was leaving on Sunday


In 30.


(I tried to not crack in front of her)


About 2 weeks later she surprisingly pitches at my door with her luggage.

I'm moving in with you!

I was excited at the fact that she was moving in with me but I obviously tried acting cool and composed.


As they're sitting there talking to each other about their families, Osho and meditation over a cup of tea.


I was adopted.


WOW - That's a huge plot twist.

She sat there speechless for about 2 minutes trying to fathom the knowledge I just presented to her.


So do you ever think about your real parents?


All the time - they both died in a car accident when I was 3.


I'm so sorry.


It's okay - I mean I know they're somewhere out there in the universe checking up on me. I speak to them when I feel lonely.

Enough about my tragic past..How are your parents?

I've never told any other soul about my parents before. She was the first person I ever told .


I never knew my dad but my mom has been living with a brain tumour for like 2 years now.


Wow. That's must've been so tough for you when you found out about it.


It was. I went through the most vicious cycle of depression for an entire year. But I'm trying to make most of the time I have left with her.


How much time do you have left to see her her and stuff ?


(She starts tearing up)
3 months


I'm still fascinated by the fact that she's into Osho, existentialism, metaphysics and epistemology. But I also felt like our relationship had escalated so quickly. We're we rushing things? The relationship felt like it was moving at the speed of light.


Do you feel like we're moving too fast ?


There's no such thing, if it's meant to be it will be, whether fast or slow as long as it's true, it will last as long as you want it to.

I was momentarily tongue-tied as I was trying to digest the words she just said.



(Still voiceless)

She still had a lot more to say after that

CUES : "rants"

But in that entire rant she said something that echoed within me.



After she said this I felt like fainting. So not only did she make me voiceless I was overwhelmed by an ocean of indescribable emotions- wow


I'd finally recovered from those powerful words she preached to me. So I found myself sitting in the kitchen trying to write a letter to her about how I really felt. I wasn't the best at expressing my emotions through writing but I gave it a shot.


Love is the unforetold explanation for creation. Love is life. It's the merger of minds. The marriage of minds. It transcends through time, it's timeless. It takes you into a dimension filled with possibilities and opportunities. It helps you understand you are that you are not worthless. Every time I am with you I understand we are here for a reason. And every time I stare into your eyes. I realise that you are mine.  

I sealed it an envelope and put it on the kitchen counter.


She opens the letter and starts crying.


I introduce her to some of the guys in the treehouse. They welcomed her to the treehouse with open arms.


So what do you guys do in the treehouse?

PAUL : (one of the guys part of the treehouse)

Well in the treehouse we just try to expand. We write, make music, poetry, nothing much really.


She was to lazy to go home and cook supper she was s bit hypocritical cause she said we should stop buying junk food. So we decided to go to McDonald's. We were down to our last packet of 2 minute noodles anyway.


We went to visit her mother. She introduced me but there was no warmth in the hug we shared. I could feel her shrill body disintegrating. She was really cold. You could see she was dying.


How've you been mom ?


She couldn't even speak properly. It was sad but when she eventually managed to responded to Ellie's question.


I'm still fighting but I don't know if I can do this for much longer.


No mum you can't leave me.


I don't want to make you empty promises my child.

Who's this handsome young man Ellie?


(Smiling heavily)
It's Tyler, my boyfriend

She just called me her boyfriend in front of her mom. She just put a label on our relationship. I thought it was completely platonic.


Afternoon Mam. It's a pleasure to finally meet you.

I knew her name ( Stacy )  but in that moment I felt like a child in primary school - so I decided to be respectful and call her mam. I wasn't sure whether or not I should call her "Ellie's mom" or Stacy. It was just a tricky situation. So I opted for mam.


( smiling )
The pleasure is all mine Tyler.

She told me to come closer to her cause she wanted to whisper something into my ear.


Tyler I'm clearly dying as you can see. So I'm leaving with you an important task of ensuring that's my daughter remains happy at all times.Take care of her for me - please


I'll take care of her - she's in safe hands.


That's the spirit Tyler. Can you give us a moment please Tyler.


Just go down to the kiosk and get me a bottle of distilled water. Please.

(Tyler leaves the room)


I remember the first time you wrapped your tiny hand around my index finger , you had my soul laying on 3 cms of palm.

( Ellie interrupts )


Mom don't do this , prolonging life is pure idiocy.

(she smiles as a tear rolls down her cheek )

Die so your soul can have its summer ,don't worry about my pain cause I'm really happy for you, your soul can finally taste true liberation, see my tears as autumn leaves falling from trees , I'm naked and all I can show you is the truest forms of love.


You're so beautiful because you're so true. Our connection has no equation my daughter, as I leave my body just know that my time with you transcends forever.


Mother it's time for you to leave. Take a piece of my happiness, it's futile anyway and I have it in abundance but I shall be lost without you in body, I shall be found when I'm with you in soul.


Clarity comes with the last breath, as hatred and love become nothing, you are nothing and everything all at once, I'm happy for you have given it to me, tomorrow and yesterday no longer matter

(her heart stops beating and her souls goes home - heart rate monitor indicates her mom has just flat lined)

Ellie starts screaming. The nurses and doctors come sprinting in.




(in agonising pain and disbelief that her mother is dead she starts screaming)



Nurse get her out of here.

She's kicking and shoving the other nurses as she is being escorted out the room.


Don't worry the doctors are doing all they can to save her.

Tyler comes back from the kiosk with the distilled water to find Ellie on the floor crying.


What's wrong?


( Her face goes pale )
She's gone ....


Ellie has locked herself in my/our room. We haven't spoken to each other for like 2 weeks.

She finally decides to come out of the room.


(Breaks down, again  )
It's her birthday today.

I've never seen her so broken and disfigured before. She's in pieces - distorted.


Death is the door between two lives; one is left behind, one is waiting ahead. Death is the ultimate experience of this life - Osho

“Birth leads to death, death precedes birth. So if you want to see life as it really is, it is rounded on both the sides by death. Death is the beginning and death is again the end, and life is just the illusion in between. You feel alive between two deaths; the passage joining one death to another you call life. Buddha says this is not life. This life is dukkha – misery. This life is death"



She put up this facade as if nothing ever happened. She didn't allow herself to mourn the death of her mother. She was apathetic for the next 2 weeks.

This  was a tricky phase because she either woke up angry or sad. She just rampaged through the house, didn't attend lectures - she just left a trail of destruction wherever she went. I even have the scars to prove it.


She gained about 5 kilograms in that entire period. She just kept on stuffing her face with ice cream and chocolates


Tyler thanks for being there in my moment of absolute depression.


I thought you were never going to be able to get yourself out of that dark abyss you were trapped in.


The sun is setting and the couple is walking along the sand enjoying each other's company.


I've got something for you Ellie

( I hope she likes it )




Close your eyes

(Takes out a heart shaped pediment from back pocket  and places it around her neck )

You can open your eyes now.


It's lovely, thank you


(Smiling back)
I'm giving you my heart but not my soul.




(In my head)
I'm giving her my heart she better not break it.

Have you ever had that feeling before in a relationship where you think you love the other person more than they love you. To the point where you'd even get their names tattooed onto your chest. Cause that's how I feel right now.


I'm driving Ellie to the airport. OR Tambo in fact. I'm playing some Jamie ** but I quickly change it and play my favourite song Female Energy.



You excited?


Yes I'm really really excited for this.


I'm really gonna miss you


Me too.

Ellie was completing her mothers bucket list - so she had had to travel all the way to Tibet and learn Buddhism. Nothing much really she was leaving  for 2 months.

But little did Tyler know that this was going to be the last time he sees Ellie because her plane never landed in Tibet - the plane crashed and it sunk with no no one  surviving.


Ellie hands Tyler a letter


Tyler please don't open this until you get home.


I'll try my best.

Car parks at drop and go zone at the airport. Tyler takes out Ellie's bag from the boot.

They hug and kiss

Ellie cries.


Tyler opens the letter.


It's funny how for someone who has been so used to being lonely, the second I grip onto something that seems real, my biggest fear is losing that grip - even though for the longest time ever I've become immune to the feeling of loneliness. The same way people become dependent on other beings, people can become dependent on loneliness too - you become immune to self reassurance, your insecurities, your vulnerability and after a while it seems ideal and okay, but only because it's all you've got. You allow yourself to be consumed by this self indulgent energy making you think you don't need anybody because how else do you get by when you know that you have nobody. So when someone comes creeping in through the front door, with nothing but good intentions - you shut them out because you've lost sight of the difference in the realness of someone coming through the front door and the fakeness of someone coming through the backdoor. I struggle to fathom your presence because I didn't see you coming, through any door, you were just always there in plain sight. I don't know how to describe what I feel when I'm around you because I have never felt anything like it. All I know is that it leaves me in a place
An incomplete screenplay.
ely Oct 2012
You are not known
Not to yourself
Not to your family
Not to your peirs
You are nothing special
Not like fine wine
Not a unique glass
Nothing new
You are just a dust of wind
Nothing to be proud of
Shame is always lurking about
While you hide under a mask of lies and the fakeness that everyone finds true
You weep with in your soul
Slowly rotting inside out
Unrequited Love Mar 2014
I don’t want to plaster on a ton  of make up to be told I'm beautiful
I want someone to look at me when im 100% me and say that they still love me

I want to be comfortable enough to get out the shower put on your hoodie and to have you still want me

The reason I have the make up, straight hair and tight clothing is because without all that fakeness someone would finally decide if they like me for me          

And I'm to scared to hear the answer
I just want to be wanted
Mind of a sinner heart of a saint ....
Stimulated fakeness that makes others faint...
Sitting out playing with time and guns....
Dont judge I never learned to walk before i had to run......
Last nights bottle is the first shot of my day...
Each time I start it pushes everyone farther away.....
You might try to save me.... But I dont want to be found...
Truth be told i hate it up here... Id rather be under the ground...
Äŧül May 2016
I thought till yesterday,
She was true anyhow,
Even as she ditched me.

But now a ****** name is here,
The Catalyst,
She was cheating me.

In search of the greater good,
She dumped me back then,
But she got back what she gave.

"The Catalyst",
Chose someone else,
Someone better looking.

She is never satisfied with herself,
Always looking for more beauty,
Physical beauty is what she sought.

And look at the comedy of life,
Sharvish sought the same,
He found someone more beautiful.

She was served rightly,
For her unfaithfulness,
For ditching true love for fakeness.
My HP Poem #1068
©Atul Kaushal
Life Jun 2014
You will not look at me.

Not even look at the brave face I practiced
Not look at the smile I painted
Not at the dry eyes I skillfully mastered

This mask I made for you to see
But still, you will not look at me
As if my fakeness, will mutilate the image you have of me

*I can tell you, it will.
jeffrey conyers Dec 2013
How to fit it?
Be fake.
Put on a pretense.
Like those anchor peoples on the newscast.

Hold your opinions.
They don't like opinionated folks.
And if they are they called personal commentaries.

How to fit in?
Put on that smile.
In life we all are actors.
It's a trait of our character.
Unless we get selected to heaven.
Then that's another matter.
We required to be real because the love of God is there.

How to fit in?
Embrace the concept of your surroundings.
Just sit back and take it all in.
Like a shy person you'll be able to describe everything.
From those that fake to the backstabbers.

Now, you can be a rogue.
Just realize renegades doesn't last in the fakeness for long.
But that's how you fit in?

You just need to ask yourself?
Is this your quest?
I keep on staring at the stars,
Thinking about the days I passed!
Fakeness has filled our place,
As if loyalty doesn't exist.
Rumours has occupied the way,
To make me feel completely lay.
Gobbles up my jovial spirit,
Still a pedestrian gets no merit!
Storms appear to roll me within,
Somehow saved myself from deep drowning.
Flew away even the beam of light,
When in darkness, I searched for thy.
But then from the back held my hand,
The footsteps approaching I heard in my way.
Back I turned to catch the sound,
Another betrayal was waiting around.
I still keep on staring the stars,
Thinking all about the days i passed!
Gods1son Mar 2019
Why do we keep how we truly feel
under lock and key

Society has trained us that
to express your emotions is to be weak

How sad that we are somehow fooled that
realness means weakness

Maybe some of us already lost how to be true

Does it not burn within you
when you act a certain way
but you know deep inside that
that is not who you truly are.
Ophelia Jan 2014
Satan's school for girls
White short dress and false eyelashes
Bubblegum ice cream and Coney Island
Oh say that, honey!

No class just ***
Can I be your pretty baby?
Take me to the New York city

I want to see you again,my handsome devil
And I am your little mermaid
Oh baby, how sad...
You don't like my fakeness

Old fashioned vanilla
Don't you think that karma is playing with me?
They always sai "Don't be shy,little girl"
But I am still trying to ****** myself

No class just ***
Can I be your pretty baby?
Take me to the New York city
The Palms motel

All I want to do is to love you
All I want to do is to love you
Do you love me?
He said "Yes, baby, I do"
Big Virge Sep 2018
When You People See ME ...  
Do You Start To Feel ... "Scared" ... ?!?  

If You Do ...  
Let Me Ask You ...  

What Is The REAL DEAL ... ???  
Let's ... INSPECT Your FEAR ...  
Let The TRUTH Be REVEALED ... !!!  
Do You Start To Feel SCARED ...  
Because of My STARE .... ?  
Or ... Is It Because ...  
My Nostrils Start To FLARE ... ?  
Or Maybe It's Because ... ???  
I've Got A ... BLACK GLARE ... ?!?
It Seems ... This Is The View ...  
That ... Most of You Share ...  
Well .....  
Here Is ... MY VIEW ... !!!  
DON'T Look At ... " My COLOUR " ... !!!  
DON'T Look At ..... " My SIZE " ..... !!!  
STUPID ... Racist Remarks ...  
Are Really NOT WISE ... !!!!!  
DON'T Do It With ME ...  
Cos' You'll Be SURPRISED ...  
DON'T .... " STEREOTYPE " .... !!!!!!!!  
It Could Be Your DEMISE ... ?!?  
I SEE THROUGH Your Guise ...  
The FAKENESS' and LIES ...  
With FORTHRIGHT Black Guys ... !?!  
YES Those Thought PROVOKING ... !!!  
And Those NOW ... OUTSPOKEN ... !!!!!  
DON'T LAUGH When You Read This ...  
Cos NOW I'm NOT JOKING ... !!!!! ...  
I'm NOT Just A ... " TOKEN " ... !!!  
For YOU To Sit ... POKING ... !!!  
Your RACIST Type ... " JOKES " ...  
While You ... SNIFF The Coc' ...  
Now DON'T Get Me Wrong ....  
NOT ONLY White Blokes ... !!!!!  
Caucasians To Asians ...  
Now Get My Blood RACING ... !!!!!!  
Because of The IGNORANT Things ...  
... You ARE Saying ... !?!?!  
"Your Attitudes THREATENING ... !!!  
Your DRESS is AGGRESSIVE ... ?!?  
Your Tone is DISTRESSING ... !?!"
"My Attitudes ... THREATENING ... ?!?  
What The HELL Does That Mean ?!?"  
My Lifestyle Is THREATENED ...  
By ... Government SCHEMES ... !!!  
Governments Run By ...  
" WHITES ONLY " ... Teams ... !!!  
Let's Just Get This STRAIGHT ... !!!  
The Blacks Who've Now ...  
... " Joined Them " ...  
Just Make Me IRATE ... !!!!!!!  
They ARE just As Bad ...  
With Their Nose IN THE AIR ... !!!  
of Men Just Like ... BLAIR ... !!!  
They STILL HATE The ... " Dreads " ...  
"Boy, cut down your hair !"
Like Barbers and Shavers ...  
Have ALWAYS BEEN THERE ... ?!?!?  
I No Longer Care ...  
About Being Black ... !!!  
OH YES ...  
That's A FACT ... !!!!!  
Some Black Folk Look At Me ...  
As If I'm On CRACK ... !?!  
My Father Is ONE ...  
Who Stabbed Me IN MY BACK ... !!!!!  
NOT Just Me But My ... " Mum " ...  
....... That's A FACT ...... !!!  
NOT ... " LITERALLY " ...  
That's A DIFFERENT Story " ... !!!  
Let's ......  
Get Back To The Subject ...  
How I Am ... " Perceived " ... ???  
And Why Most of You Think ...  
I'm REALLY ... " Scary " ... !?!  
You People DON'T LISTEN ... !!!  
You Sit There ......................................... Dismissing .....  
The Problem's Blacks' Face ...  
In ... EVERY Workplace ... ?!?!?  
We're STILL Underpaid ...  
And Being ABUSED ...  
And ALWAYS Fall VICTIM ...  
of New BOGUS Rules ... !!!!!!!!!!  
Believe If You Like ...  
DISMISS If You Choose ...  
We Can LOSE OUR COOL ... !!!!!  
And These Days It's GUNS ...  
Just Check In The News ...  
DUMB Rappers Sold Out ...  
For ... Financial CLOUT ... !!!  
And That's The New Message ...  
The Media ... " TOUTS " ... !!!  
That's What Blacks Are About ... !?!  
EVERY Young Black ...  
Is NOT A **** Lout ... !!!!!  
But That's Your EXCUSE ...  
When Young Blacks ...  
Start To SHOUT ..... ?!?  
Back In The Old Days ...  
In The .... " U.S. of A " ...  
We Were TOLD NOT TO SPEAK ... !!!  
To Simply Be ... "meek" ...  
And WATCH OUT For WHITE SHEETS ... !!!!!  
But When Brothers Came ...  
With A ... Message of PEACE ...  
BOTH Malcolm and Martin ...  
Were BOTH ... "Put To Sleep" ...  
If We SPEAK ... We Get BEAT ... !?!  
If We DON'T ... We Get BEAT ... ?!?  
SO STOP Your ACCUSING ... !!!  
When YOU KEEP ABUSING ... !!!  
Cos THIS You May FIND ...  
Is A DEATH LINE Your Choosing ... !!!  
I'm Writing This Prose ...  
To Stay OPEN ... NOT Closed ... !!!!!  
Just Like MY NOSTRILS ...  
When Frustration SHOWS ... !!!!!  
Let Us EXPRESS ...  
OTHERWISE Take The BLOWS ... !!!!!!  
Muhammad Has SHOWN You ...  
How THAT Contest Goes ... !!!!!!  
REMEMBER These Words ...  

What YOU SEE Is ABSURD ... !?!
I'm A PERSON Like YOU ... !!!  
NOT A ... Violent Tool ... !!!  
STOP Trusting Your Telly ...  
The Message Is SMELLY ... !!!!!!  
Just Because I Am Black ...  
You DON'T Have To Be ... " WARY " ...  
My Moods Like Yours ...... " VARY " ......  
So ...  
Do Me A FAVOUR ...  
" Stop Saying I'm Scary !!! " .....
Simply, it's HARD to be Black ANYWHERE, but, in London, contrary to what is presented as being The Truth ..... Don't let all the Pretty, Polite, TOLERANT Talk, Fool Ya ... !!!!!!
Big Virge Aug 2018
WHO ....
Do you ... " Trust " ... ???
and ... Who are your mates ... ???

cos' people these days ...
MOSTLY ... are Two Faced ... !!!

They .....
Talk with you ...
Like Everything's ... " COOL " ...
But ...
Watch Them .... CLOSE .... !!!

You May Get ... FOOLED ... !?!

I've Fallen .. FOUL ...
of ... " Fiendish " ... Cows ...
Who've tried ... Their BEST to ......

Bring Me .... "down" .... !!!

But I'm ... STILL HERE ...
while they ... STILL CLOWN ...

TRYING ... to judge ...
Like ... Simon Cowell ... !!!!!

I'm ... NO JUDGE ...
and DON'T Wear ... Cuffs ... !!!
But ... Two Faced Liars ...
WILL GET ... Touched ...
by words I ... Write ...
That ... HUFF and PUFF ...
and EXPOSE ... Those ...
Made of ... FAKE STUFF ... !!!!!

So ...
DON'T ACT ... " Tough " ... !!!
If You DON"T WEAR ... " Glove " ... !!!

I'm the ...

" Lord of The Rings " ...
WITHOUT ...................................... Gandalf ....... !!!!!

Guys Tell ... LIES ...
DON'T Be ... Surprised ...

They Normally have ....
A ... " Two Faced Wife " ... !!!

"under" ... The covers ...
They LIE to ... Each Other ... ?!?

HOPING ... Their Fraud ...
Will NOT Be ... UNCOVERED ... !!!

But ..
Big Brother's ... WATCHING ...

Check Out Channel 4 ...
That's where we ... NOW SEE ...
These TWO FACED ... Female ****** ... !!!!!
Who will ... LIE Their *** Off ...
To STOP being ... " Poor " ... !!!!

THIS ....
Is An ..... " ACT " ....
Two Faced People ... PERFORM ... !!!

Now That's JUST ... " TV " ...
But This IS Now The ... NORM ... !?!

From Work ...
to the ... Pub ...

to ....
This Thing We Call .... " LOVE " ....

These Days We NEED ... " Guidance " ...
From WAY UP ..... ABOVE ..... !!!!!

These LIARS ...
DEFY Us ...
By GAINING ... FALSE Trust ... !!!

But ...
CAN'T STAND ... The Heat ...
When Their Ways are ... Discussed ... ?!?

"What did she tell you ?"

"YEAH, what did he say ?"

"He said you're a ****** !"

"He said I was gay ?"

It takes one to know one !"

"Wait what did you say ?"

"You may have a girl,
that don't mean you're not gay !"

These are ... " Examples " ...
of those who ... DISPLAY ...

A Level of ... FAKENESS' ...
In ... MULTIPLE Ways ... !!!!

So WHO ... Amongst you ...
is Simply ... LIVING PROOF ...

That Humans tell ... LIES ...
MORE THAN They tell ... truth ... !!!

I'm Trying to ... Show You ...
to have some ... " Good Taste " ...
Before you ... "Embrace" ...
Someone who's ... TWO FACED ... !!!!!

cos' These Days ... These People ...
Are in ..... EVERYPLACE ...... !!!!!!

From Houses that ... GOVERN ...
to places where people ...
CLAIM ... " Poetic Grace " ... !!!

Some Poets are ... LIARS ...
Who NEED TO .... " Retire " ....

It's Simply ... MY VIEW ...
I May Not mean ... YOU ... ?!?

DON'T Get it ... " ConfuSEd " ... !!!
or ... Try to be ... SMART ...

In The End ...
Time will ... TELL ...
Who speaks TRUTH ...
Through Their ... ART ... !!!

cos' LIES Will Be ... OUTED ...
By ME ... The NEW ... " Shaft " ... !!!

A Brother who's ... COOL ...
and Building My ... CRAFT ... !!!

Don't Think that i'm scared ... !!!

I'm ALWAYS ... Prepared ...
to ... Back UP ... My Words ...
with ACTIONS ... BEWARE ... !!!!!

I'll take you to places ...
Where Eagles ... DON'T DARE ... !!!!!

I'm writing ... Like THIS ...
to Prove i've got ... GIFTS ...
and DISMISS These .............................................................. This FAKE People ...
who speak with a ..... Hissssssss........... !!!!!!

and SLITHER ...
Like ... SNAKES ...

The TRUTH They ........................................................... Forsake ... !!!

and These Are ...
The People ... You KNOW are ...

............. " Two Faced " ...........
I've dealt with so many in my lifetime, that it made sense to write about em' .......
J Mar 2018
I did not like pro wrestling -
No sir - I found it rough.
All the blood and weirdy fakeness!
And dudes almost in the buff!?!

I did not dig pro wrestling -
I found it most uncouth!
I found it much beneath me -
If you must know the truth.

Then I finally watched pro wrestling...
To prove to a cute boy I wasn't a fool.
And ******* I must now humbly confess -
At least - Shawn Michaels.... is pretty cool!
My husband grew up watching wrestling and I being one of three girls was never exposed to it and definitely had a predjudice against it. But honestly if nothing else  it turns out it can be pretty funny and we even had Stone Cold Steve Austin’s entrance music as our entrance music to our wedding reception..and it was awesome (Shawn Michaels’ music is still my favorite though but wildly inappropriate for that venue :))
Ting-Jun May 2013
The anger built inside me
That no one ever sees
It’s the speck of sand beside the sea
A single leaf among the trees

The loneliness taking me
That no one understands
Surrounded by all this fakeness
No true love; just one night stands

The pain slowly killing me
That no one ever feels
New wounds bleed and old scars ache
Marks that’ll never heal

The sorrow consuming me
That no one can ever sense
Tear stains upon a sheet
Two hands (destined) to never meet
Written 2010
Michael Hole Aug 2019
I said I'd write a poem for you,
Once I got to know you,
And now, I think that I do.

It took some time for your colours to shine,
But now I'm done, so here,
Let me show you.

You are light as the day,
With no hint of dark,
It's all bunnies, princesses and pink.

You bore me to tears,
Like a bar with no beers,
And you certainly can't handle your drink.

You're the arms-length kind,
A mediocre mind,
Fakeness and lies are your craft.

You flutter your eyes,
Like a sneaky tweety-pie,
And all the boys start acting daft.

It can't all be bad,
That would be sad,
Of course, there are nice things to say.

I just don't know what they are,
Not those things in your bra,
I've seen bigger **** in ballets.

You have a nice ****,
a nine, if I'm asked,
But that means that I'd have to say...

If I'm being true,
The best thing about you
Is the sight of you walking away.
I never gave it to her.
Jaspal Kaur May 2017
I am fed up of pretending that how
strong I am.
I am weak and sluggish.
My soul is drained.
My heart is hollow.
Even my tears refuse to mourn for me.
I hate myself.
I hate the the fact that I am incapable of
loving and being loved.
Dianne Sep 2013
I love how quickly we just fell into place
like nothing happened,
like a year of nothing, a year of void space
didn't get in between.

I love how natural we can be
after that long miserable gap
and how I know I should feel
a little pretense--a tiny fakeness
but there was none of it.

I love how easy we fall into step
like we've been swaying to the same song
a thousand of times
in our shared separate universe
with each other--like we never even left.

I love our alternate universe
and how it still existed
waiting for us,
knowing that we would fall
like missing puzzle pieces
and it did fell in the right places,
making it seem whole.

and I love how the continuity
of what we had and now have
felt infinite and somehow real
and promising and that the idea imprinted on
a beyondness in the future.

but I do not love
how I could not forget
how I was left expecting
--no, assuming of what could've happened
on the miserable gap
because I am afraid that it would've changed
every. little. thing.

I do not love
how a simple little thing
stood between us like a wall
that got thicker and thicker,
piled with red hard bricks
and along the linings of our hearts,
a tinge of uncertainty had ensued.

alas I do not love
how quickly you bounced back in my life
thinking you could just walk into that wall
without even asking, without trying hard
you crossed that wall that easy
like snapping your fingers
or clapping your hands.

I do not love
how you chose now instead of then,
instead of yesterday,
or the day before that,
or the month before that day
or the next day when you decided to disappear.

and I do not love
how quickly I let you in
how I decided that i should still hold on
how I responded, shaking off the hesitation,
brushing off the doubts,
letting you fill me again
with that light only you radiate.
I'm sorry that I am inadequate
I am sorry that I am absolutely confident
I'm sorry that I'm happy
I'm sorry that you're miserable more than half the time
I'm sorry that you only start loving me once you've broken my heart and I have left

I am sorry that I am not rich or possess glamorous material
I am sorry that these are the type of people that you would settle for
I am sorry that where I come from there is no ego, smallness or bigotry
or watch dogs to keep stars in check so they're humble for there is no extreme self-ansorbtion
I'm am sorry that you cannot feel and I am not there to heal once your conscience starts to breathe
I am sorry that I have failures and dysfunctions
I am sorry that you feel small and inadequate when I achieve
I am sorry that when you are angry; everyone around you must be just as angry
I am sorry for the weakness in you to hurt others because you are constantly hurting and cannot contain it

I am sorry that I am not perfect and may not be everything you have ever dreamed
I am sorry that I have to be crucified for the mistakes and faults of previous lovers
I am sorry that I don't have a *** appetite when I am feeling down and low
I am sorry for being direct and sincere
I am sorry that there are certain things that I do not feel anymore, pains that just cut the broken pieces of my heart
I am sorry that wars have turned me into a recluse and gave me no choice but to grow
I am sorry that I resonate to vibrations that radiate positive energy
I am sorry that I found solace in solitude and understanding myself

I am sorry that womankind has been scarred by men who had failed to understand the feminine energy within themselves
I am sorry that I am to blame for your emotional instabilities
I am sorry that you cannot run as fast as the best athlete
I am sorry that I cannot drive as fast as the best Nascar driver for I do not have a car
I apologize for low tolerance for *******, lies and fakeness
I am sorry for my emotional scars
I am sorry for  intelligence when it cannot reach you
I am sorry that you cannot understand how wounded I am, if you did you'd stop trying to hurt me for you'd only be hurting yourself
And lastly I apologize that you lack self esteem to realize the magnanimous potential within you
but see it is self-esteem, work that you do on yourself with the support of those who serve goodness and your best interests

I am sorry that the world is filled with the filth of hell
but what the heck I cannot be sorry for searching for heaven in the circumstance.... So I'm not sorry for divinity.
crackedheart Nov 2015
stop trying to be mister nice guy
when everyone knows you're the complete opposite
stop spreading awful lies
and make everyone think that's the truth of it

you smile pretty pretty
but then suddenly want to **** me
don't you dare stab me behind my back
i'll grab your knife and stab you right back

i don't get why
you have to tell lies
when everyone knows you're lying
there's no point in vying

what's your problem?
you're so paranoid
you can't solve them
just because you're life is a void

you seek happiness
in times of people crying
because you know that your fakeness
is finally working

no, don't get me wrong
i didn't fall for your stupidity
d'you really think i believed all along
all your lies and all your fake stories?
to all those fakers out there, stop trying to be mister nice guy because not all angels worshiped God ;)
Prerna Sinha Aug 2015
i am in a world, a dream world
my eyes are closed but i am awake
this world is so close to the world i have always dreamt of living in...
i can feel the joys and sorrows of life
yet it's so different from the world i am living in
i want to be a part of this world ,forever
Here i am , with my eyes closed, my mind relaxed
i can think what i want to,i can feel what i want to and i can desire what i want to...
it's a pleasure to experience this...
i am luxuriating in this world of mine,
with no hassles, no obstacles,
no tension,no frustration,
it's just a world of xpectations and negotiations.
with my eyes closed, I can feel the outer world,
the one blessed with fakeness,mistrust and selfishness...
but i am proud to have a world of my own,
that inspires me to create wonders in every world that i step into...
Soham Naik Apr 2015
There is nothing.
Its the only thing that i see..
I have conceived emptiness..
In trying to be someoneelse..

The busiest road in oneself..
is the path of thoughts.
because that’s where people often get lost.
So i’ve  tried to visit it less.

There is that chaos.
Which can’t be heard..
But i feel it inside my head.
N now i perceive it like a nerd..

The fear of not being cared.
haunts me day and night..
The only moment i meet myself..
is when i am outside..!!

Now this shell asks for rawness.
As it has seen much fakeness..
The heart aches out a song..
when it sees nothingness..!!
johnny fundyga Oct 2015
(part one)
heal me, my healer, and hear me relay
sounds of a silence that sink as I say
magic makes matter with souls of the sun
bringing to light what, by life, must be done
beauty by name knows but nothing by book
tailor your terra to tempt me to look
know not the vices of violence and voice;
choose but the chances that chose us by choice
red wind is rising to rival the rain
following footprints that paint without pain
empty; the forests of temples of fate
homeward this path that is lulling my gait
dew makers sleeping, they shake as they rest
scared of a world where the sun rises west
frost coming clean to reclaim healthy cause
blooming a garden that cries when it thaws
unlearning language for oneness in tone
singing with nature's implacable drone
gleam of the ethers from air and from earth
riding the waves of celestial worth
following love and its serpentine trails
soft; carried on the most tempered of sails
wind-sung we sing on the prophetic seas
kisses of bliss keep the sea-sick at ease
deep all directions the sapphire stretch
picture abyss only makers could sketch
lost for the never on tidal unknowns  
oceans are homes made the same as our bones
animate majesty, mantra for those
restlessly bested by those who oppose
we know you're starving and freezing and scared
killed by the meaningless secrets you’ve bared
candles can carry the dead to their graves
no need to loosen the nooses of naves
see through the formless and faceless facade
hear the diffusive vibrations of god
people all speaking, both living and dead
talking in tandem like spindles of thread
how do we live? for the skin or the core?
how can the soldiers of peace fight for war?
angels so tangled with angles of death
breed all the beings that banish my breath
greatly immune of municipal hell
make much the matters of mannered men well
monarch; the meshwork, are left without hearts
merging the dreamtime emergence of arts
deviate cautiously from divine hold
rewrite the writings the passion bells tolled
dancing with winds lets the words conjure clouds
stillness; embracing the peace that it shrouds
promise to calm us for what he destroys
wakes up your namesake in lieu of the noise
gather the essence which rather plays chance
echoing off of the echo’s expanse
colors grow colder with notes of old news
shout to the horses out running in twos
wonderful people asleep in their beds
bellow, like autumns of yellows and reds
shades of the greens making credo machines
halting the ships just to justify means
vision, a visage of purples and blues
kissing the dusty-foot soles of our shoes
imprints of infinite fires aflame
amity call of the indigo aim
mother; a father of lands to be shown
birthing grey earth that will neighbor our own
in a glass box made of everyone's dreams
warmed by the water; I see them as streams
golden, we hold them; we stand for the purge
giving our gifts to the gods that emerge
crawling from places that replace the skies
stories of travels unravel third eyes
walk to the edge and discern which way's up
sip from the ripples that form in your cup
heal me, my healer, and stay with me still
manifest fate through the use of free will
stable; the fable: "I love, and I hope."
foresee the patterns like kids skipping rope
seven significant; twelve of the whole
hallow the hologram holding the soul
what changed the orchids to middlemist red?
why when they speak do I hear her instead?
similar ways are our motionless gaze
you make my waking on tireless days
though I may see by the sombering me
closing the crypt keeps a dreamer's eye free
patient, the chaser, emaciate me
force me to feel all the feelings as she
start with the atom and move to the skies
all this as rain is contained in her eyes
glutton of love, for the love's all around
grounded by groundings found bounded by sound
warmth of the heart kindled twins of a spark
circles that need not now be without arc
knowing we’re growing and where we belong  
push north to bring forth to celebrate strong
talk of amends and the love that it sends
space is displaced but the love never ends
bracing the dawn as we’re drawn to the sky  
heal me, my healer, the timing is nigh

(part two)
heal me my healer and hear me relay
time is a wheel that will steal us away
roll through the hills where there’s love in the grass
warming the shivering spirits we pass
far back behind us, you’ll find that we’ve been
down to the depths of a place deep within
deep down the earth, soul been snared by the pit
happiness, patience, ascend all from it
ravel the helix, the twist in the pond
crawling from water, the portal beyond
perish traditions see unchanging eyes
grasp at what’s gasping for air in disguise
free of the voices that rattle like glass
free from the flesh and its form and its mass
there is a matrix that’s written in code
such are the numbers that map out the road
see our blood running like lights through our veins
fractions of laserlight fluid like trains
make the connection that’s always between
what is organic, divine, and machine
negative entropy, fall like the snow
bring me to places that only you know
somewhere between the Euclidian line
realms where the parallel coalesce fine
vanquish the cubic dimensional fears
if we are circular, let us be spheres
quiet the screamers of salient winds
crumbling science where silence begins
pyro, the spires of fire consume
water that’s pouring for lores of the bloom
unbounded air that will carry the seeds
planted in earth to fulfill earthly needs
dreams of white elephants enter her side
out walks the teacher that under trees died
what of the stable where shepherds were brought
stealing the metaphor cradle with thought
answers of split the antiquity mind
pulse of the gatekeeper stored sages blind
author, the abstract of poetry eyes
push back the blackness that pours from the skies
hands of the clock are like mages that lie
from whence the beast burnt the cradle does cry
bind the entwining, the ivy, the bound
love-like mosaic, archaic the sound
dawn flows from space with the bells nature tolls
waking the sleepers to rouse body’s souls
fairies are dancing the campfire still
long after centuries burnt up their will
hum of the cello as golden leaves fall
break in the day as the light makes its crawl
crest of the desolate mountains we’ll climb
vexing the loneliness owning our time
truth is a flower that sprouts when we sing
ever we resonate winter to spring
all the white rain that tastes pure on the tongue
must have been born as the raindancer sung
stolen our sight twilit lily pond blue
take too our ears for the ambience through
trust flowing from the first cycle of sun
laughter, my love, for the world has begun
all of the forms of the goddess’s heart
come out, I see them, the whole in the part
it’s in her smile, her voice, her embrace
look not beyond all the love in her face!
dancer, the astronaut gravity holds
stay so the motions don’t hide in the folds
burn the reality, heat of the flame
toss in the fire your face and your name
let us be over the bridge made of black
river of white can ignite coming back
knowledge, devotion, and action create
blankets to reach for the sorrowless state
human, the weak, and the fallible one
soon come the day where we’re clothed with the sun
how clean’s the road between thought and the words?
can’t they just sing like the crickets and birds?
cast of naivety born with your birth
claim same supreme as all men of the earth
never again shall they meet face to face
faces are fakeness that stand in our place
off to the forest, renunciate mind
grieve not for all can be lost to mankind
I am thy pupil, I’ll sit by thy feet
searching for answers somewhere in the beat
save me, my savior and sleep while I wake
take now your rest and diverge dreamer’s lake
swim and be free from the shackles of skin
swim and explore where no person has been
shape now your art and your worlds shall unwind
open the eyelid, the eye in your mind
love is too finite a word to contain
all of the infinite lives that remain
hold I resolve to spend all of my days
lost in my poetry testing the ways
best to explain what it is that I feel
vibrating low somewhere lost but still real
struck, as if lightning had cast from the sky
answers I knew hid from taciturn eye
let us be one as we’re destined to be
I will be you, my love, you will be me
-two hundred lines written for someone at some point about a reason to live.
--it's now an ironic piece.
Shuvam Sharma Sep 2018
Dare to say a 'No' whenever you feel like not doing anything
Share your problem and cry with people instead of saying "I'm fine"
Give people compliments with criticism directly instead of backbites
Speak truth even if it's bitter instead of comforting lies
Cause fakeness is a curved blade, my friend
Will hurt you and get you in pain
Have that courage to take off the mask
And show people the real you
A little time it may take
Few bitter memories you may make
Some close hearts you may break
But that's okay
Cause at the end of the day
No more fakeness will stay
No more showing off you will have to do
Everything will be easy, you will be at peace
And that will  matter the most ❤️
Silver Wolf Jan 2014
You wake up to the sounds of foreign beeps and buzzes
Pounding their way through your eardrums
Invading your head
Manipulating your thoughts
You find yourself strapped down by some invisible force
You can’t quite make out
Opening your eyes is too hard
Drenched in layers of sweat
Built up from last night’s visions
Clearer than the sunlight
Faintly glowing outside
Is it even daylight?
You don’t even know
Or remember
There are no windows in this place
White walls drowning out your thoughts
Your ideas
And replace it with sterile censored
This phony face you stole from the inmate who
Sometimes invades your privacy
Feigning clemency
All doctored up in a silver platter in the form of
Syrupy voices laden with empty promises
Emptiness screams louder than parties and bars packed with people
It seems as if no one is here
Yet everyone’s watching
Spirits haunt this prison while i sleep
They are always here
They never leave
Whispering my mistakes
Constantly reminding what I could have been
And never will
Make them go away
It finally dawns on you
This is the place of nightmares
And there is no escape
Katerina Oct 2013
There is a girl. A sad girl. Whom I’ve known since I was a little girl. She helped me, get away from all the hurt as a child. She always put on a smile for me. No matter what was happening, she smiled for me. I never noticed the sad tears in her eyes, the bruises and cuts on her skin, the fake smile on her lips, or the pain in her heart. Not until I turned 12. When I was 12 I fell into a sadness that was so unbearable I thought I should die. She told me I was worth it when I was young. I never believed her, but it felt good to be noticed. When I turned 4, she didn’t have as much time for me. She had another girl. A girl who needed her more. Then when I turned 7, she had another girl who needed her more than the first. Then when I turned 9, she had 2 children that needed her much more than the first 2. I thought she was my guardian angel. But she only had time for 4 children, not 5. She didn’t know that I was the weakest. She didn’t notice me anymore. So I sat alone crying, my heart dying. But she didn’t know. Now we don’t speak anymore. We’ve grown so far apart I can’t even talk to her or look her in the eye anymore, for fear she will push me away again. I had been pushed away too many times for another heart break. See, I never understood the pain in her eyes, the bruises and cuts on her skin, the fakeness of her smile, or the pain in her heart until I turned 12. It all screamed help me, I break too, I’m not perfect. How do I know? Well I didn’t until I felt the exact same way.
Hayley Jan 2015
This morning, I just wanted to sleep,
I was violently woken by your voices

The worst kind of wake up call is
the one that teaches you that nothing
is ever going to change.

I've given up on trying to find a way out,
I've stopped believing I'm not alone
I'm still surprised every. single. time.

I thought by now I'd be used to this,
I thought I was the King of Hatred
The Queen of Disappointment

Everytime she screams, or he screams, or
I scream
It hurts just as bad,
I still can feel the weight of my family's dysfunctional fuckery crushing me,
I will be nothing at all.

But for now,
I get out of bed,
Look in the mirror,
And smile.

The fakeness of my family lives within me, too
Actually happened this morning.
My mom made me leave the house with her.
Donald Durham Nov 2010
Under a cloak of stars we hid
Hiding from what, we didn’t know
She bared her soul then,
Asked for a smoke
We smoked cigarettes and stared
At the city
Like a million tiny lost ants
They march without purpose, unlike
Their insect counterparts
Who all work towards a common goal
No, these human ants exist only for
Individual gain, definitely not the good
Of the masses
We sat on a blanket in the dead of night
Like two vampiric picnickers
Contemplating the over contemplated
Meanings of why, what, where, and who
Nestled up against a barrier
Not unlike the one that binds me
This mountain of peach, gold, and brown
Stands foreboding in the background
Of this town
We lay here in this artificial nature
Of grass where none should be
Looking skyward for answers
To questions we have yet to ask
And timid rabbits fret at our presence,
Just outside the light in the shadows
It is night all around
Yet only dark when eyes are closed
But when I close my eyes
All I see is light
Not the light that is desperately
Trying to upstage the stars
By inviting you to watch
The carnal dance of flying insect and bat
That is its deviant diversion
Show them discovery-esc nature
So they learn to love mans light
More then those of the heavens
But alas, mans light holds no sway
Here for this is a night for lovers
And we are lovers here
Then she asked if she could
Lay next to me
And bury her face in my neck
Of course, I said, at the cost of a kiss
Placed gently on the flesh found there
And kiss me she did, as the stars
Were aware because just then
I seen them narrow and turn green
With envy
And oh how envious they were
They knew then that their life would end
Their time would come
When they no longer twinkled as bright
But our love would never die
Never lose its twinkle
Never be spoken of as lackluster
Ours was eternal
And theirs was not
I held her there
Next to me
But not quite ever close enough
And then still, very close
So close I can feel her inside me
Circling my soul with the breath
From her lungs
"Breathe out love, so I can breathe you in"
Touch me so I may again feel
I long to know genuine feeling
Of the thread only she can bring me
In this artificial scenario
With carnivore intentions all around
And stars that wont just be happy for me
With a city of plastic and glitter
Ruled by a neon god,
At my feet
Begging for penance
For my forgiveness for their fakeness
Because they know what I possess is real
More real then they could ever dream if being
And a mountain crawling at my fingertips
And I lie here
Thinking of things that
Don’t require thought
I am spent
Emotionally drained
Essence pulled from existence
Have lost weight here
I can float
And I am floating
Weightless and without gravity
I fly towards nothing in particular
With no needs or wants
Just happiness and content-ness
And whatever else that doesn’t really matter
Or does it?
I do not know these questions
Because I seek only answers
Ignorance is bliss
And bliss is
What I crave
But is bliss happiness?
I wish I could be ignorant
And close my eyes to reality
Because maybe the stars
Aren’t envious
Maybe they are mocking me
Laughing at the real ignorance
The real travesty at hand
Is maybe what I think is,
Really isn’t?
I guess I am just a blind fool
With my eyes open
Lying here
Not knowing what is what
Or why, why is
Or where, why came from
It was time to go now
My mind was reeling
From the mental punishment I gave it
The pain stuck like glue to the back of my eyes
We folded the blanket and made our way towards the car
The rabbits were happy they could come out
The stars brightened
We walked arm in arm
Wishing for the night to never end
And our weariness to fade
Like the American dream
This was a night for lovers
And we were lovers there
In that park
On this night
Under these stars
I take from this place
The knowledge
We are all lovers
donald durham 2010
kaitlyn Dec 2013
the anger built inside me
that no one ever sees.
it's the speck of sand beside the sea
a single leaf among the trees.

the loneliness taking me
that no one understands.
surrounded by all this fakeness
no true love, just one night stands.

the pain slowly killing me
that no one ever feels.
new wounds bleed and old scars ache,
marks that'll never heal.

the sorrow consuming me
that no one can ever sense.
tear stains upon a sheet,
two hands destined to never meet.
JNuwewenka Apr 2013
We are white-washed
by the pale moonlight.
So all i plead...
Is that you grant me permission
to color it in, to color you in.
& effortlessly
like a snow leopard in December,
with these young candle flames
that have taught themselves to become our pens,
we'll connect the dots that are the stars
& write our history
among them.
No placing curfews
on our success stories...
we will allow them to interact with greatness,
& "fakeness"
will be just another broken-winged bird
outside our frosted windows tapping to get in.
But even if we did let him in...
they'd be no room for the both of us in these "boxes"
we've grown so accustomed to thinking in...
Think again.
Let him in.
Let him
cozy his feathery body at the fireplace
of your furnaced desires,
& as you watch the smoke rising higher,
as his existence


— The End —