I still remember the warmth of your hug but I don't remember why you turned cold on me.
I still remember the truthfulness in your words but I can't remember when they turned into lies.
I still remember the promises you made to me but can't remember why you broke them.
I still remember the day when you said you loved me but I don't know when it turned into hatred.
I still remember the day I met you for the first time but can't remember why & when you left me.
Whenever I am sick at heart,
a river of never ending thoughts
flows inside me.
A state of utter confusion besieges me.
Tears are at the brink of falling.
My heart at the verge of collapsing.
Sense of complete helplessness surrounds me.
This in when words come in for my rescue
"Writing is real healer"
For you to love me,
Your heart should be broken into pieces.
Some people will make you feel loved
living a thousands miles away,
While others will make feel alone
even sitting besides you .
Some people will support you
even though you are beyond saving ,
Others, like a leech
will **** your all your happiness and energy.
Some will always sacrifice for you
no matter how much wounded they are themselves,
While others will remember you
only when they need something from you.
Some will love you with all your
flaws and imperfections,
Others will try to change you as if
you are a glitch.
Learn to segregate between those “some people”
and “other people”.
You were there and I was in love.
Love, then you decided to leave.
Leaving a void in my heart.
Heart drenched in emptiness.
Emptiness that turned me mad.
Madness that gripped my soul.
Soul which craved for something to feel.
Feelings that were already dead.
Death that created the void.
Void which can never be filled.
I let different boys touch me
Because I wanted to know
Even for a second
What it felt like to be loved
Even if that love was cheap
And it tasted like ***
Like the punchline to a joke
I never got because it was me
I let different boys have different parts of me
Parts that they didn't deserve
But I offered up willingly because I couldn't give anything else
Because you broke me
And I was looking for different fingers
To place different pieces and hoping
That the outcome would be a masterpiece
That maybe one of them would find a way
To cover up the handprints you left all over me
I let different boys touch me because I had to prove to myself that you wouldn't be the only one
That the scars that mark my body wouldn't define my worth to be loved
I am still not entirely sure that you aren't the only one
Who could ever touch me
I let different boys touch me because that is all I have been taught
To be a joke
To be silent
To be ready to give until you have nothing left
- I am hoping one of them will show me
- they keep leaving me and I am to scared to offer up anything more than my body to get them to stay
I have been to hell.
It was when you left me and i needed you the most.
It was when i realised i would never hear your voice ever again.
It was when i wanted to grieve for you but i was too weak to cry.
It was when my heart ached to see you just for one last time.
It was when your memories turned into mere broken promises.
But the sad part is
"THERE IS NO RETURNING BACK FROM HELL"