"evaluate" poems
sunflowers lean in the direction of the sun
although this sunflower leaned in the direction
of the warmth that came from the moon
the mysterious light that attracted the flower
not from what it was familiar with
a new experience and a new way to bend
--
although the moon sung with the flower,
pampered its petals with faraway words and
danced through shadows that felt so close
the moon was in the sky
the sunflower danced, lone
in its own lonely patch
the sunflower was the sun of its own
danced to its own tune, smiled, laughed
was so sure of the world and its offerings
but the moon had its own tune
a slow, cautious, steady, unsure
dance.
the sunflower thought to please the moon
whenever it could with its own light
to dance as the moon's stage and to love
but the sunflower could only dance
for so long, until a petal fell
from its yellow petal crown
the sunflower could not evaluate why
it danced for its love. it simply had
to keep dancing
although the sunflower knew that
its petals were falling off
and the sunflower had bent too far
the sunflower had its own frustrations
but the moon hurt wherever it shined
the moon's songs were so achingly
tearful
the sunflower hardly had any petals left
when the moon began to shine its light in another direction
Jan 28, 2018
Jan 28, 2018 at 11:58 PM UTC
I don't know much of anything about life or love or the grand "meaning of it all," but this I know: I hate the constraints society places upon us, ropes gathered up to knot relationships, tie them up and place them all in nice neat little packages with a cute presentable bow on top. We're supposedly in the "honeymoon phase" right now and we joke about how we'll know when it's done, when the real stuff has begun. But sir, the way I've spread my scars open, reopened all those old wounds for you to discover, evaluate, and assess, I refuse to believe none of this is the "real" stuff. Sure, maybe one day we'll have an actual, honest-to-goodness argument where our mouths become cannons for the shots we volley back and forth. But I can't believe, stubbornly refuse to even consider there will be a day I'll look into those emerald eyes of yours and not fall utterly in love all over again. I can't imagine a morning of waking up and not being grateful to have you next to me. Maybe love isn't constant perfection, and there's no way that every single day will be a dreamland fantasy, but maybe, just maybe when you've found a forever kind of love there isn't a "honeymoon period" at all. Maybe it just is, and that's enough.
Aug 16, 2014
Aug 16, 2014 at 4:59 PM UTC
study, cram, call, make plans...
power point, presentation, speech, rewrite...
theory, materialism and idealism and the difference,
Marx, Freud to psychoanalyze...
on to polynomials, linear equations, I make a scientific notation...
take a break. (eat)
ham sweet and thick
with lots of pineapple and some cherries
potato bread and cheese
PowerAde to rehydrate
little vodca with o.j. and cigarette
after lunch, breathe .
and it’s back to study lab to mentally beat meat.
paper due, final today, did I remember to triple check
and get rid of paper clips, include a cover sheet...
ready to evaluate... I think.
ready to second guess, miss dates and time, "you're late"
again...
95, 98, 3.5 GPA? pre-test, for final, make sure your research is done,
site, source, quote, student rate and double space
power nap, smoke again,
is the day over yet?..
Nov 26, 2012
Nov 26, 2012 at 3:52 PM UTC
Commitment issues
This again?
Yes but this time these are my words
Not the labels thrown at me by exes
Like arrows attempting to pierce me into place
I thought it was meant to trap me
But I think they just wanted me to stop
To think
To really evaluate myself
To see the truth
Im afraid of commitment.
When I've been told this in the past
I read it with the understanding that
Commitment issues meant I
Just couldn't have or didn't want a relationship
And that just couldn't be true
I mean just check my track record
No, see
My having commitment issues
Is rooted deeply within my past
These problems originate in an exciting mix of
Trust issues
Abandonment issues
And a variety of other traumas
I am not afraid to enter relationships
And I do not avoid love
Actually, I am obsessed with finding love
With being loved
All the while trying to love another
Thinking I'm succeeding
While subtly sabotaging myself in the process
When I was small
I did not receive the respect and care
Needed to show I was loved
Though my parent said they cared
They didn't protect me the way they should have
I had to take care of myself
Look out for myself
Because I was the only one I could trust
Anytime I got close to someone
They'd either decide to leave
Or get ripped away by outside forces
I was alone a lot
And not great at making friends
With the abuse happening at one house
And some solace found at the other
I was constantly fluctuating between
Hellhole and liberation
All while trying to have a childhood
And survive adolescence
So when they say I have commitment issues
They're probably right
But not for the reasons they think
Not because I'm polyamorous
Not because I don't want to commit
Not because I don't love and
Not because of who I am as a person
My issues come from a long line of
Different abuses by people who
Were supposed to protect me
But didn't
So if you think to judge me
For the trouble I have with trusting you
And trusting you won't hurt me
Or decide to leave when I'm "too much"
Understand that I did not choose to be like this
I didn't choose the pain that led me to love
In such a haphazard way
But I am choosing to do something about it
Sep 2, 2018
Sep 2, 2018 at 8:48 AM UTC
Preface
**When the broad mind has opened, to gaze the stars that shinning in the unfathomable skies and the glittering Nature, its flowers’ fragrances given to taste the wealthy realms of her, as well as Earth's mysteries—that I ever think of to feel and by my thoughts that spread so deep to try to work with things that sounds of ‛creative’. Here I the ‛moody soul’ started his first journey, leaving his home a few years ago and his up-start was through Literature, Science and Arts and Fiction. Writings and paintings here I believed to be most powerful and that those more often need to convey by the Artist’s conscience and the intensity that gains moral knowledge and appreciation. Here the book has the pictorial paths of Quest and the wanderings, all by imagination’s boat, sails from the western Ideas and its enthusiastic flow. Some finds hope along and also hopelessness, God and Love vagabonding among these ink-stained pages.
Dreamt in the wandering world where no chains shall bind, from the dark veiled lands to the daring spark, no atoms that obscure the force calling light, to aim the glad precious moments of life, to embrace me with a silence and its whispering magic, where gate of hope’s always open to bliss, thundering words are always from roam, the nocturnal pleasure that I only know, and when all will run away as time—why I alone in the upward steps of solitude that caressing wild only wings?
If I met Life as a strange stage of different senses—and I only say you to enjoy the aggressive fruits of my invention. Here it is for all of you can read and evaluate.**
Nithin Purple
Acknowledgement
**This book is dedicated to my parents of Love and support,
from where I got the powers to be inspired—to write and prove.
Special Thanks to Parisian Author and poet Roman Payne of
‛cultural book’ for supporting me as a writer of varying tastes. Also Writer, Wilson B Sanchez of New York, who first gave suggestions
and his valuable sparkling comments of self-improvable topics, which I always bother. Belated friend, poet and writer, Curtis Plaskon from France for his valuable support. Also Poet Timothy & Hilda from Virginia, to them I had good writing memories. And for all the Indians, this book is an open heart to read.**
Apr 3, 2014
Apr 3, 2014 at 3:06 AM UTC
I
I am often attracted to things unhinged. Not necessarily (traditionally) romantic, more akin to an unwillingness to ask permission, one who might say It was never your permission to begin with and not be angry or upset about having to say it. Few are so willing to evaluate situations without the overwhelming cloud of emotion. Judgment fully withheld, kind banter catching wind. A needed immediacy.
Jean-Michel Basquiat was aware of the past. He pretended to not care if you did not like his paintings. Part of him was upset some people did not understand. Basquiat strangled history down to basics: music, culture, society (not the same thing), generations of family after family. His point was not for you to obtain this. This was his conscience—tangible. Brain processing. Synthesizing. To him it was so simple. I refuse the word primal because it is misguided, it does not factor purity, clarity. Sugar Ray Robinson told Basquiat to stop painting the background. Tuxedo told Basquiat what words to place and where.
So much of my art is stripped and lucid and enacted with only me in mind.
Jan 20, 2015
Jan 20, 2015 at 9:16 PM UTC
It's getting me worried
It loses all glory
Confusion and fears
Is there, what appears
Another strange moment
The energy's missing
Its colour is new
A new day processing
As if I changed
My program in brains
As if the software
Needed some updates
Relaxed but tense
The opposites rule
Too less defense
Too much to do
The energy's a useful tool
I need to get from somewhere
It should appear inside of me
Not the confusion, that I see
I kinda lost something
The passing days
I tried to evaluate
But it's a mess
I wanted it perfect
I wanted it right
But now life's teaching me
It's alright
I gotta accept it
I gotta move on
I gotta just stop
Comparing at all
Too much to question there
I know, I don't know where
The best solution's hiding
But I will fight, Ill find it
This is already
What I do right now
I give myself energy
I give myself power
I encourage myself
To go on
Keep on moving
On fighting
Stop crying
Amusing how dramatic it sounds
My creativity now is unbundling
I will heal the confusion
I will break the illusion
I will always keep going
And myself, it is growing
Feb 1, 2017
Feb 1, 2017 at 6:23 AM UTC
Providing evidence to myself
I sense boredom
As adventure
But solution to a rusty bolt
Without smeared oil
While unearthing self
Before boredom detects you
In the vicinity
The environs speaks
Actions are no curiosity
To be nosy
While others exist with their dealings
A character brings passe'
To detect
But not evaluate
The boredom
Which leads to nowhere
How can a heart stop pulsating?
Only to have no charge
Jul 26, 2010
Jul 26, 2010 at 10:48 PM UTC
Individuals evaluate their own opinions
and desires by comparing themselves to others.
Grow up with a family of perfect siblings around,
was to compare by parents.
Knowing studies wasn't good during school times,
was to compare around friends.
Knowing wasn't much talent in yourself,
was to compare among the public.
That girl over there?
her brother is so awesome.
That guy over there?
he dumb.
That man over there?
he can't do anything at all.
We were all labeled by others.
What happen if we take off the label?
Does our name reveal and tell people that's who we are?
Do they accept the fact?
We aren't that perfect, we aren't that smart, we aren't that talent.
Still, will you accept just the way we are?
we are just a human that try our best to live.
Feb 3, 2015
Feb 3, 2015 at 9:38 AM UTC
Be still my soul, be still
Dont worry about the open tomb
There is a reason, why is this happening
Trust Him, instead of doubting
He has drawn the portrait
In a perfect beauty and form
Learn to adapt this moment
Look at whats ahead of this
Its a guarantee to find answer that is unknown
Reflect, ponder each of this
Open this eyes like a first time
Like a new born baby
Be excited to the future
Evaluate this heart O God
Echo again the words in my ears
It is finished, it is finished
The curtain was cut into two
O through Your blood I am victorious
Nothing in this world can separate
This life was meant for You
Burn me with fire from heaven
Strengthen this redeem man
I need You this all day long
Apr 21, 2010
Apr 21, 2010 at 5:25 PM UTC
Ten page paper
Orchestral Excerpt Jury
Music History
Sight Singing exam
Practice piano
Piano final
Make revisions
Evaluate
Drink coffee
Cry
Get drunk
Try the ten page paper again
Take some advil to get through the jury
Try to wake up in time to get to 8am Music History
Hope to not get a sore throat for singing exam
Piano piano piano piano
What were we talking about in religion?
What am I doing my paper on?
When's it due?
Music. Music. Music. Music.
Cry.
Cry some more.
Get **** done.
Dec 1, 2011
Dec 1, 2011 at 2:27 PM UTC
Adversity is one of the things we can’t escape in our lives; it is also one of the biggest hurdles that we must overcome for us to become better individuals. However, is this meant to be a negative, cynical assessment of what we must look forward to? The answer to this question is no. There are several effects that adversity can bring to our overall being, it can be either positive or negative depending on how you evaluate them in your perspective.
One of the best things about adversity is that it’s a forceful being that tears us away from our comfort zones. It is like a strong wind that brings us to the places that we want to go but with hesitance to do so, it also removes the things we have grown fond of but are holding us back from what we should be, leaving us to be in the best shape that we can ever become instead of just imagining it from afar.
Despite the best thing that we can get from adversity, it can also ******* us if we become too stuck in an unfavorable mindset wherein fear and pain comes to play. We think so much of the unknown that we forget that we have to move on, until when we do so, so much time has been wasted.
Adversity is like drowning in a river of neutrality; we drift to the currents of the same common thread and forget every bit of unique trait we have upon us, and while we face life like lost ravens drifting through the darkness, searching for traces of non-diminished skies, we find meaning in our lives as we find that small patch of white light at the end of every misery we have conquered.
Jul 24, 2016
Jul 24, 2016 at 8:41 PM UTC
Nothing intimidates me more,
Than a woman’s inviting smile,
It pierces right down to the core;
Appealing to everything I adore;
This subtle, suggestive, wile:
Whetting the sense of anticipation,
Igniting fires of the imagination.
Nothing possesses more power,
Than a woman’s determined will;
Disguised as a delicate flower,
Sweetness smothering the sour,
Regardless of the pyrrhic thrill;
Bewitchment in everything but name,
Savouring the illicitness of the game.
No ordinary man has a prayer,
When a woman stakes her claim;
She’ll welcome you into her lair,
Reject her desires if you dare,
Her revenge has legendary fame;
Travelling incognito: deadly intentions,
From this wrath, there are no preventions.
Do not ever, ever, underestimate.
That which cannot be understood:
Avoid the temptation to speculate,
Categorize, classify or evaluate,
The secret mysteries of womanhood;
Whenever tempted by an inviting smile;
Nod politely then turn, and run a mile.
© Paul Chafer 2014
Nov 15, 2013
Nov 15, 2013 at 6:19 AM UTC
I am get petrified and frustrated being alone,
I go to parks, places all alone.
I see people all around me with love and all together.
I am conflicted for a while
Knowing or unknowing whether its good or bad for me to be alone and having space for me-time.
Or is it sad that I am completely alone.
But now if i evaluate I see myself what I am and what needs to be done.
I am a better me now. A me which had to transform into something from nothing at all!
Mar 10, 2017
Mar 10, 2017 at 4:34 AM UTC
When the first words out of his mouth was
"Sup *****
I knew a certain few things
1. He was not getting laid tonight.
2. None of us in this room know why he's the party leader,
All glancing at each other in awe
nodding like a hive mind chanting
yes, this man is in fact an *******
no, i don't know how he rose to power
yes, he did just call us *****
3. I could think of a million one liners that would earn me way more respect up front than that.
I don't know what I was expecting
walking into this basement
Maybe some small fame
The same small fame I get from getting on a stage for slam poetry
or being cast in a reality T.v. show
Or singing kareoke at my local bar.
Maybe for the free pizza
We've all been there.
And yes, maybe it was for the revenge.
the campaign slogan you stamped
recruitment posters with.
Join the evil league of evil!
Launch revenge against the modern heroes of today!
But when I sit down in this small fold up metal lawn chair,
in what is presumably his moms basement
Behind a projecter (also probablly his moms)
Next to captain nose bleed
And princess ********
I already don't have a whole lot of faith in his agenda
So when his opening line
Was "Sup *****
Like that is some sort of impressive villanous monolouge peared down into one and a half words.
I lost any ounce of faith I had in this cult.
And decided to Usurp this "Party Leader".
Now you might be asking:
Why?
Why would you want to be the head of the evil league of evil?
Founded in this pre pubescent boys moms basement
Whos only followers so far seem to be captain nosebleed,
and princess ********
Well
clearly
You don't understand.
Captain nosebleed is already under the thumb of princess ********
I mean lets be real without princess ********
We're three dudes in a basement
Pretending to be super villans.
And you've been known to be pretty charming.
But in your friends evil lair.
Sorry
Moms basement.
You start to evaluate your situation
Gotta make a descision.
Are you fighting for Revenge,
or the small fame?
Apr 19, 2016
Apr 19, 2016 at 2:53 PM UTC
Glad to see you, the ORANGE hatted man said to the YELLOW shirted Person seated in the FULL Reclining Chair, WHICH *By the *way, was ONLY in the Half Back Position. Being in the Half-Back Position allowed the YELLOW shirted Person to respond in Just a Slightly UPLIFTED EYE ANGLE !! And, the ORANGE Hatted man, Peering Down, with Head ***** Gave EACH of them an EQUAL Opposition Eye Angle of 22 Degrees EXACT ! ! Now, to Verify the fact of Equal Opposition, the PROTRACTOR MAN arrived promptly on the scene to Evaluate the Situation.. He (protractor-man) Had , for the Very FIRST-TIME, been especially Called for this HISTORIC Moment . YES,,YES,, For the very "FIRST-TIME" Equal Opposition between an ORANGE hatted man and a YELLOW shirted person, USING the Measurement of "ALL-MEANING", *THAT IS:: "The Protractor of Life"... This Historic moment would forever be Relished by Another Member of THE SOCIETY , BUT it was up to the Assigned Protractor Man to Assure all Interested Parties, That the ANGLE of Exactness was * C O R R E C T ! ! OR....it wouldn't COUNT ! OH DEAR GOD,,"THOUGHT" the assigned Protractor man, Let my Measurements be CORRECT ! ! The ORANGE Hatted man continued to Patiently Peer at the YELLOW shirted person seated in the :HALF-BACK * Position in the Full Reclining Chair.. A Trumpet Blast form a BRONZE Bassoon,, announced the arrival of a SPECIAL LADY ;Fully Gowned in STARTLING PINK AND Glimmering WHITE PEARLS , adorning Her Neck and SUN-KISSED" DIAMONDS flashed from her Fingers. In her Right hand she firmly grasped an envelope. She Careful in her opening ,as if it were a SEVEN-SEALED SCROLL ** Pulled out the PURPLE with GOLD INLAY INSCRIPTION ,"CERTIFICATE OF APPROVAL " FOR THE Magnificent level of ACHIEVEMENT by the ORANGE hatted and YELLOW shirted man ,VERIFIED BY AN "UN-COLORED " PROTRACTOR-MAN" "HEAVENLY" PRAISES AND ACCOLADES FILLED THE AIR** AND A "BOOMING-THUNDERING VOICED" "NOT-EVERYTHING WILL BE IN......."B L A C K & W H I T E " ! !
Dec 13, 2010
Dec 13, 2010 at 3:26 AM UTC
Today
for the first time
I felt my own mortality.
Before, I went through life
deliberately ignoring death and its couriers
absently aware but blind
to the dangers of life.
Today
I realized that life
is nothing but a quest
to escape death
neverending, never ending
until that day
when everything stops.
Before today
I never had to evaluate my life
in a split second
but today I had to remember anything and decide
(not like I had a choice)
if I was ready or not.
Twelve more inches and
who knows what I would be
saying now.
Nov 13, 2014
Nov 13, 2014 at 12:34 AM UTC
An introvert, I am not
I am just alone
Unattached from iniquity
Peace is all I seek
Reflections from adversities
I evaluate with a hardened stance
Nonspecific abandonments
I negotiate with my floodlight
In mental conflict with my soul
I split atoms and debate
Intuition overwhelms me
yet I accept all things out of my control
Like Wonder’s vision and spiritual being
I remain passionate while on my throne
Feb 21, 2016
Feb 21, 2016 at 7:03 PM UTC
Soon, the weight of independence
will swat me from my day-dream
like a gnat from the sky.
For the life in the great beyond
is hell for the naive
and I am but a fledgling
in a lake of swans.
What have I learned about being human
and what must I still learn
before I am ******
into the void of 9-5
and ''car-pooling"?
I still dance beside the river
and swing in the park.
I still stay up to late
and sing too loud
to old songs from Disney.
And now society demands
that all of my future endeavors
will be decide by
some letters
that don't evaluate my worth
as a human being.
My entire life, present and future
have become rooted in knowledge
that contributes nothing
to my personality,
morality,
my goals as a
person.
(or is that no longer a relevant term?)
Freedom, Independence,
The American Dream.
And when I lay in my coffin
and reminisce
on the adventure that was life,
and how I touched lives
and solved personal issues,
rescued friends
from normality.
How I fought for the betterment
of a minority,
I will be glad I learned
Pythagorean Theorem,
Newton's Law.
I will smile coldly in my grave.
I shall thank the Lord
I went to college.
Sep 18, 2013
Sep 18, 2013 at 2:34 AM UTC
Yeah, I am older and bolder
Reborn to be a fighter
Mature, yet I am responsible
Still not wanting any trouble
Getting older is not a problem
I am just wanting more time to be solemn
Quietude is a great opportunity
To evaluate my worth, my rights and duty
I am bolder, creativity is my passion
No time for heresays or wrong notion
I am teased by kindness and respect
Beauty is in the heart, not from what they expect
I am older and bolder, just feel me now
I was waiting for so long somehow
Explore my exotic beauty and madness
Take me, bathe me with your sweet kiss and caress
Oh, take me now, my love, I am yours
Lets have plenty of travels and tours
Take me to the heaven, take me to the moon
We will grow old together, our life will start soon!
Oct 1, 2015
Oct 1, 2015 at 6:43 AM UTC
If you heard it from the mouth of my father or your father
you would marvel
and you would ponder
and you would not question without evaluation
But since it spills from the mouth of a wide-eyed girl
you dismiss
you retaliate,
you don’t evaluate.
You shut down because your perception of intelligence is NOT
the tasteless temperamental teen tantrum
They all have these strange ideas?
Must have seen them on the TV
must have heard them from the trashed or the terrible
It's a taboo: what if the kids have ideas?
What if they're smarter than you?
From the mouth of her father
to the space of her ear,
the things that we say
are the things that we hear
If you heard it from the mouth of my father or your father
you would marvel
and you would ponder
and you would not question without evaluation
But since it spills from the mouth of a wide-eyed girl
you dismiss, see her mouth as a kiss
Don't forget that she's capable
of so much more than this.
May 28, 2017
May 28, 2017 at 2:11 PM UTC
We live in a world where society decides what's real
A world where you are told who you are and what you feel
If you're anorexic or you cut you're an attention *****
And they try to beat you down until you can't take anymore
Or if you get pregnant and are still a little young
They say she's probably a **** and drug addict and high strung
Not realizing that it's really not even their place
Even if it was at least have the guts to say it to someone's face
Instead of judging their live evaluate yours
Stop whispering he say and she says behind closed doors
So what if they're anorexic they're in pain
And if they cut it doesn't mean you can call them insane
Because it's not even your place to say
Shut the hell up stop acting arrogant and move out my way
You are not them you are you
You don't have a ******* clue about what they've been through
Nov 19, 2013
Nov 19, 2013 at 5:43 PM UTC
maybe you will think
maybe you will feel
we all have reasons
we all have decisions
we all have explanations
does it count
does it matter
will it evaluate who we are
will it assess our personality
sometimes it will take seconds
or minutes
or years
what if it takes 100 years
to get back again
to turn that chance again
to hug her again
to say you love her
to say sorry
to make her feel
she's the one
she's the only one
of all the hundreds
xoxo
Jul 5, 2021
Jul 5, 2021 at 2:56 AM UTC
My mind is but a blur
A remnant of what I used to be.
The voices try to tell me
That I'm not crazy.
But the eyes of others peer
Into the depths of my soul.
They seem to evaluate me
And judge me as a whole.
My dreams haunt my life
As the shadow sweeps me by.
The truth I once understood
Is turning into a lie.
I find myself craving chaos
And wanting to destroy.
It's as if my mind
Thinks the world is my playtoy.
Sep 12, 2016
Sep 12, 2016 at 10:30 AM UTC