Stand up and try
Break yourself and die.
If you feel the pain,
you have much more to train.
Feel it burn,
take your turn,
every step anew,
every time you learn.

Go for the greatest,
always have the newest latest.
Good is not good enough,
Don't whine, tough up rough.
Feel you ache,
know what is at stake,
Don't you lie down
take every chance to take.

And if you died in the process,
a weakling not more or less.
Know that you did this all for nothing.
Instead of just enjoying the progress,
instead of even enjoying something.

Don't try for perfection,
choose your pace at your satisfaction.
It's for your own protection,
don't see this as a lection,
in the end, it's all just your own action.

Have I ever lived if I say
I've never felt this way?
Have I been thinking to real
Denying all I'm starting to feel?

Have I been too sceptical
To experience the end of all?
Have I been stupid
The things I rid?

I'm loving for the first time
After so many times I tried?
Did I never care a dime.
Had I such a blurry sight?

Or maybe I've never felt this
Because it hurts a lot
It's a feeling I won't miss
A feeling I haven't been brought.

To fall for someone who
Makes it complicated
Because he is in love with two
and you're the one who's overrated.

To fall for someone you'd die for
And he would die for you
However there's someone more
who'd die for him too.

As in a chess game I have lost
However, I keep my fingers crossed.

An artists life is blue
When its mind is red

A gipsies say is true
When you're already dead.

A smiley can be sad
and crying can be good

A life can be pointless
If you can't see where you stood.

A world can be square
and a line can be straight.

It's a neverending line,
because you are affraid.

Affraid of the face of blue
And the colour of red

Affraid to see you
Affraid of the dead.

Meet me at the ravine's drop
Feel my body covered in frost.
Find me at a mountain's top.
As you have earned my trust.

Heat me with that heart of yours.
Hope me with your words.
Cover me with planets' cores.
Fly me with the birds.

Drown me with your dreams.
Choke me with your hug.
Blind me with your beams.
And slowly become my drug.

For I have awaited your presence.
And hope I couldn't bear.
And now I enjoy the incense.
Of the mighty red flare.

Sing the song of the broken
Reap the words of the hurt
Silently dead awoken
A crow's beak around a bird

Dance the weather of the storm
Cry the rains who tremble
The crops who creepily form
A true horror's assemble

Play the tides of the depressed
Laugh the sounds of the undead
Guess the impossible unguessed
Take my only love's fed

Hear me roar and mumbles of hunger
Drink the blood of my mind
Hear the anger in the thunder
I am nowhere to find

Socially I'm not the greatest
Interests that haunt the latest
Fantasies for the fiction
Find me in my friction.

The cold nothing fills my ears with frost
The emptiness will leave my poor heart lost
Horror and madness overrun my mind
As an icy wind that my soul feeds and grinds

Only disturbed by the voices of sorrow
The judgements of tomorrow
The voices which are the worst to hear
My own voices who fill me with fear

Oh sweet child don’t you mind the still
Oh small sorrowing thing, try as you will
You will go mad tonight, and die out of fright
For the voices, oh the voices, they have gripped you tight.

Simple beauty is often complicated.
One who tries too hard isn't pretty.
But where exacly is it stated.
What defines beauty?

One is appealing to the eye.
But can be rotten inside.
It can all be one big lie.
One doesn't care and doesn't try.

One can be visually unappealing.
But a beauty within.
In the end, that one would win.
But one is sad, it's a sin.

Simple beauty is simple and short.
True and honest, yet humble.
One cares and repells the wrong sort.
It's the one that'll make you stumble.

Unanswered love is the best one so far.
At least it isn't you who'll give me the scar.

Pain is the best, when no one is at fault.
When your own emotions turn into salt.

At least I'm kept at a safe distance.
At least I can show you some resistance.

You keep my heart secure.
By being pure.

By not loving me.
You have set me free...

Bubbling in the oceans deep.
This is where I sleep.
Greeted by the white shark.
As he gently dissapears in the dark.

Charmed by the massive whale.
Who reunites with his female.
My fingertips streak the ocean's floor.
Nice and warmed by the earth's core.

Streaking over the lonely anemone.
To find out he was never alone.
Cuddled by shellfish.
I never wanted to seem selfish.

It all seems like a dream.
Gently flowing with the stream.
In the end it's just how I feel.
But for me, it'll always be real.

Today a most peculiar day.
All was in an orderly way.
Every kid was sorted in a row.
All was neat and tidied with a bow.

And when was asked to write down our name.
All pens moved inmedeatly the same.
There were names in purple, pink, red and blue,
But my pitch black ink pen just didn't do.

Everybody looks at me and frowns.
I felt an idiot, and they all looked like clowns.
The worst part was the unwanted pity.
As if I've been through the worst in this city.

For my ink wrote words as black as my soul.
The words to never be read at all.
My name as dark as a beetle eye.
For I still don't know,... Who am I?

But every word I wrote down on my sheet.
And every time my name was written so neat.
My pen would lose it's ink more and more.
And the darkness would seize, dry and sore.

And that is how my inner colour shone.
As every letter left my comfort zone.
My silver words now burst with light.
To think they used to be as dark as night.

Write your pain away.
But allow your ink to stay.
For we grow and we learn.
With every feelings that burn.

I'm on my way
On my way to the hills
Giving me chills
It can all go wrong now...

I will meet you on the top
The top right ahead
I will be dead
When I will get there...

I shall run to you
To you so far away
Please, I'll be your prey
To die for you...

I have slept too many nights
Now you are gone
Everything gone wrong
Right when I'm here...

I'm here for you
On my way
My way to the top
Where are you???

I'm gone too
Who says who?
What is gone when you are gone?
What does it mean to be true?
Is that you?
Can I see through?
Is this wrong?
Sing my song
Hear me rhyme
The end of Time
___________

Lonely at the end.
Where will I go from this path?
Empty trees with shade

There is no beginning here.
We'll have only sad endings.

Hear the forests cry.
The leaves who tell their own rhymes.
Only to forget.

Try and find a poem on my page
Who wasn't written by heart
That falls appart or doesn't know how to start.

Try to find a word in my life that didn't mean a thing, that felt like just a fling or just herds of words collided on Bing!

Search me a letter that didn't feel or kneel upon my souls whose whole has a seal of my real.

Search me a backspace where I didn't cry, or where I tried to deny my endless colourless sky.

Seek a reason not to read me, I beg you. I will be pleading my readings t'ill the end of time. So I'll be needing you, heeding me, feeding me, reading me t'ill there are no words left. I need the theft, to steal me. So you would heal me. Please, even try to feel me. This is the real me.

Turning my back to the soil and face the starry night's sky.
Amazed by the hypnotising lights of suns that had to die.
The seizing of the light in another world gives us these nights.
Maybe another other worldly girl like me looking at these lights.

She'll see other suns that have died in the distance.
But other than ours their sun will never be lit.
For her sun has died with only in a glance.
And her dead remains are all she sees with.

Her hopes and dreams have died far away.
For she never got older after that demise.
But with her death good came at day.
Because death created our starry skies.

History has repeated and today I'll still turn my back to the soil.
For there is no time for our world to seize it's light and boil.
We will always be blind of another.

I stand here naked in the crowd
A spotlight hits me where I'm proud.
I'll flash the skin of my bones
I will cry to you! Hear my moans!

I will come clean in the open field
Remove my mask and lower my shield
Oh please, shoot me in my roots.
Bleed me! Throw me off my boots.

I am but only a human being.
For it's not just the lies I'm not seeing.
Refuse to be more than I'm capable of.
There is no such thing as peace, fly off, dove!
I have lied, I have deceived.
I have hated and I have grieved.

But I am only mortal.
Imperfect human and fertil.
A beast of the many.
Proud of inventing the penny.

I stand here telling the truth!
The elder, the grown and the youth!
We are but a brink of humanity!
Already through our sanity!

Hit me with your words which shall not be spoken...
I hope, I dearly hope, I'm not alone who feels awoken.
Here the world will grand a token.
For my fellow who are broken,
Accept we are but only human,
Yet human we shall be...

Captured in an empty forrest.
My mind has left me today.
Ran away on it's own, alone.
He has fled me, when the sky got grey.

My body, alone soulles.
Never to be found, here in the ground.
But he's off to a better place, my mind.
And I have gotten used to it, the sound.

It's the noise of madness that keeps pesting me.
Silence is lonely, but can ease me at times.
My mind now in a lush pink cloud.
While my body is stuck with self influenced mimes.

But when he got back, my mind.
He was in for quite a shock.
He would never have expected.
Chaos, disaster, as timed by a ticking clock.

Being back to reality as if awaking from a dream.
But the dream not ending but becoming a nightmare.
And your life is filled with monsters.
The judgement, the dissapointment, the deadstare.

As if everybody can live your life better than you.
Yet they still prefere to live their own lives.
And my mind being numb, not knowing were to start.
While others are still on a pink cloud, thinking of their strives.

If there was a better way to live my life.
Don't you think, I'd live it that way?
I'm not as masochistic as I seem, you know.
I do not prefere things this grey.

I know what I'm doing, and know much is wrong.
But many of the thing I do, the things I've done.
Where only when I got pushed against a wall.
Or do you think I did it all for fun?

Captured in an empty forrest.
My mind will leave me tomorrow
Run away on it's own, alone.
Leave me again with my own sorrow.

Darkness rises.
Toxic level emerge.
Enough disguises.
I'm at te verge.

At the end of me.
At the start of fall.
What became of me.
Look at me crawl.

Black eyes.
Red whites.
All the lies.
All the fights.

It didn't end well.
It never got good.
Ring the alarm bell.
No one stands were I stood.

It's over, it's gone.
My head got insane.
I should've known so long.
Never enter memory lane.

It's over, it's gone.
I've finally lost it.
The will to fight was wrong.
And I will never fit.

Push and pull
Yin and yang
How is this
The only song I sang

Close and far
Wrong and right
How can it be
We always fight

Ups and downs
Mistakes and remorse
Why do we always
Make things worse

Human nature
Wish we were greater.

Push and pull
Love and hate
How is this
My forever mate

Close and far
Pity and war
Why is it always
An ending with a scar.

Ups and downs.
Depression and joy
Oh why do I miss
Being with that boy

Human nature
Wish we were greater

Why don't we begin
Appreciate what's within.

Sometimes, ... it works if you deal with the world
not have the world deal with you.

Sometimes,... it helps if you live with your life
not spend your life living life.

Sometimes,... you'll need to stand back to be great
not be greater and stand back.

If there is no positive thinking, then try progressive thinking, it's better than pitiful thinking.
It's no use to grieve about how your life ***** and there's nothing to do to it, and spill that to those people who's lives haven't ****** just yet.

It's better to shout your growth, and amplify your position, to compare your life to those who just always have a half empty cup of coffee, rather than spill the last empty half you've only got on sorrowing a cup that could have been half full.

Sometimes it's better not to name yourself, to agree you are not special, not different and definetly not the only one...

Sometimes it's better not to name how you feel, not to agree that your half empty or even empty cup of coffee has been spilled over the pages of your success. Success' that used to be visible are still there, if only, only for you.

Sometimes it's okay to like yourself, who you are, how you look, what you did. You're never the bad guy in your own story.

Sometimes it's okay to make mistakes. There's no use to sobbing over spilled coffee. Even the greatest stains of coffee can be washed out, but only by yourself.

Sometimes, it's okay, it's fine, and it's okay to be okay, it's okay to feel fine.

Sometimes is the only time no one knows what will happen, but you will know what to do.
__________

Hold me,
The cold me,
Tell me what you told me.

See me,
Free me,
But please never flee me

Charm me,
Warm me,
Oh but please, do harm me.

Because you feel me,
The real me,
Your property to peel me.

Hate me,
Wait for me,
It's not just my fate for me.

Drown me,
Don't you frown at me,
At my open gown and me.

**** me, please **** me
Have that rill on me,
If you will please,
Have blood spill me,
Your ***** fill me,
Have my spine chill me,
But please, after this, **** me!

A sweet charismatic wave of colour emerges,
into my empty soulless mind.
Carefull not to leak the notorious oiling spill of darkness,
that penetrates the thought and reverse myself to the futile point of the being I was.

It'll erase the peacefull love and war among myself.
It'll dominate me, and revolve my subtle urges to force myself to a slumber which will never be awoken.

Don't spill the darkness that spoils my mind and rots my roots into a meaningless void of emptyness.
Spare me such accommodation which will hassle me out of my trusted habitat and free my soul only to be replaced by an horrid entity.

Maintain my cloud of unknowing and protect me, from the sinister depts this world has yet to offer.

Ferret on my lap.
Fur all over my shoulders.
This is what love is.

When the skies avert you eyes,
and you wear you flawless disguise.
When you've just escaped demise,
to step into the fury's lies.

When the dawn of darkness is near,
you know just what to fear.
When the cloud's right here,
taking everything you hold dear.

When your sight goes sore
you didn't know what to sign up for.
When all you want is more,
but you're drifting further from the core.

When you just want to stop,
making everything a flop.
When you noticed all you drop,
all the way down from the top.

When you noticed you're not wandering,
stopped being interesting,
no one hears you speaking,
pleading,
bleeding,
begging for more,
because pain is something,
and all you want now, is to start wandering.
_______________

I can't ask him to set his dream aside for me,
But I'm curious at what his answer would be.

I wonder if he would've gotten me out if my ditch.
If he could've shown me a way out of the pitch.

I wouldn't trade my dream for him.
I can't ask him to be with me on a whim.

Though I keep wondering what would happen if,
and only if, he would stand with me right now...

Would I still be pouring my eyes out over all this sorrow?

What is a Haiku?
Guess how many syllables.
Five, seven then five.

So how to make a Tanka?
You add it two more seven.

Every time he coughs my heart skips a beat.
Every time he's silent my worries gain more heat.

Every time he sneezes time stands still.
Every time he cries my spine remains to rill.

Every time he falls my courage drops an inch.
Every time he's sick my mind starts to flinch.

Don't take my baby from me please.
Every time he licks his fur, my heart can rest at ease.

Crawling into my layer.
Hungry for more.
Go ahead, make your prayer.
And beg your God t'ill you're sore.

For my eyes are drenching.
And there's a hole in my chest.
I'll always be watching.
Waiting, lurking to **** you my guest.

Blood will be drooping and clench
Into the screams that are made.
Covered by my sweet revenge,
Please let them be fooled by my façade.

And my eyes twitching hard.
Sore dry and red.
As it all gets discard.
When I'm not being fed.

My fingers scratching my face.
My mouth drooling with war.
And a lady in white lace.
Who had been stolen from far.

The typical muddy nails.
The well timed rhymes.
The screams that prevail.
The horror mirrors the dark times.

Oh, it's that cinematic feel,
Of when Dracula emerges.
The devil and his deal.
The night got so gorgious.

And the taste of the brains.
That are reaching my troat.
No more personal gains.
No more original quotes.

It's that creepy nights cough,
And a horror be feared.
As the jumpscare was just bluff.
Yet I thrilled as they dared.

It's that creepy night upon my eyes.
Big swollen black eyes on both sides.
Oh I know this is goodbye.
That alone I have abide.

It's the zombie feel when your eyes want to shut.
You're forcing you through this movie with fright.
With the creep, the witch or the nut.
Say goodbye to your sleep tonight.

For you won't sleep for a while anymore.
Oh the joys of a horror, making your eyes sore.